Why I've been up all night plotting revenge on Qantas

The Advertiser

18-07-2025

This is a sample of The Echidna newsletter sent out each weekday morning. To sign up for FREE, go to theechidna.com.au
I spent the night fantasising about catching the thief. I'd easily overpower him, of course. He wouldn't know what hit him. I'd smack him in the chops once or twice, truss him nice and tight with rope so rough it would leave burn marks and then call the cops.
That's the nice thing about fantasies. Old blokes with dodgy backs and arthritic shoulders are transformed into expert kung fu practitioners with supernaturally fast reflexes.
But as the evening wore on, the fantasy darkened. I'd delay that call to the police. First, I'd interrogate my whimpering victim. Make him squirm, even wet his pants. Find out where he lived. Promise I'd pay him another visit. Let him experience the vulnerability and fear he'd instilled in my daughter by stealing the spare keys and security swipe to her apartment.
She'd rung me earlier in tears. She lives alone. A locksmith wasn't available until the following day, and she feared the sound of her door lock being jiggled during the night. So I spent that night at her place, sharing her sense of being violated and consumed with thoughts of revenge.
The next da,y an email arrived from the CEO of Qantas, Vanessa Hudson, confirming I was among the 5.7 million Australians whose personal frequent flyer information had been compromised in yet another corporate data breach.
Cue another sleepless night fantasising about vengeance.
But this time it wouldn't just be the cyber criminals who hacked their way into a "third party platform" - a Qantas call centre in Manila - who would feel my wrath. Retribution would also be visited upon the entire corporate sector, whose negligence and penny-pinching continue leaving us exposed and vulnerable.
Barely a week passes without a major company releasing another slickly worded, legally vetted hollow apology confirming customer identities are floating around the dark web, available for purchase to the highest bidder, all courtesy of a failure to implement tighter security measures.
The latest Qantas breach isn't just another technical failure. It's symbolic of a wider rot that has crept into corporate culture - businesses refusing to grasp the obvious that investing heavily in robust encryption and state of the art security systems is a revenue-enhancing strategy, not a cost centre.
Data protection builds trust. Trust builds loyalty. Loyalty builds repeat business. It's the equivalent of food safety in restaurants. Poison a customer? You'll be closed down. Allow a customer's data to be stolen? Brand damage, expensive class actions and millions spent on marketing campaigns to rehabilitate your image follows.
How can businesses so focused on the bottom line not do their sums? And who else finds it ironic that at a time when consumers enjoy more power than ever - a critical or positive social media review can profoundly impact a business - we've never been treated more contemptuously?
Companies crave our personal information. They've called it "the new oil" for years. But we have seen so many breaches and resulting inconvenience for customers that a growing number of big businesses now look more like reckless prospectors, mining customers for their data with no concern for the consequences.
So here's what I've been fantasising about: governments, regulators and we - the customers - need to stop rewarding corporate complacency about data protection.
Tougher penalties must be imposed on companies who leave customer information exposed or stolen because of lax security measures. Executives and their boards should have remuneration and bonuses tied to the level of digital security they provide.
And it's more than time for governments to mandate tougher cybersecurity standards, not vaguely worded "best practice" measures that leave enormous wiggle room for businesses focused only on their bottom line.
Qantas should know better. Once a company with strong and emotional community ties, its reputation was shredded under the final years of former CEO Alan Joyce because of an obsessive focus on profits and investors.
Its email to millions of Australians showed it hasn't learned much. Almost half of it was devoted to a point-by-point lesson on how to "remain vigilant to any misuse of your personal information".
Let me add another suggestion. Quit the Qantas frequent flyer program. It's promoted as a loyalty feature but is clearly nothing more than a shoddily protected data-mining exercise.
It's one thing to have your keys stolen. It's another to leave your front door open to thieves.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Have you suffered because your personal data was stolen? Have you stopped dealing with companies that misuse your information? Should tougher penalties be introduced to penalise businesses with lax cybersecurity measures? Email us: [e-mail]
SHARE THE LOVE: If you enjoy The Echidna, forward it to a friend so they can sign up, too.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- Former federal Labor leader now NSW independent MP Mark Latham has been roundly condemned for allegedly photographing female MPs in the parliamentary chamber without their permission.
- The jobless rate has risen to 4.3 per cent, surpassing expectations, as the number of unemployed Australians jumped.
- A man has been charged with the theft of a car linked to several high profile violent incidents, including the alleged "politically motivated" firebombing of a Melbourne synagogue.
THEY SAID IT: "It takes 20 years to build a reputation and a few minutes of cyber-incident to ruin it." Stephane Nappo, French security expert.
YOU SAID IT: It was a small act of rebellion John didn't realise he was committing when he wore a bright yellow parka on a gloomy city day. In a sea of black puffer jackets, he broke the strict winter dress code.
"Be a mellow fellow in your yellow, John," writes David. "Donovan sang about 'Sunshine Superman', after all. Aside from the pleasant contrast with the dour, black puffer brigade, you are far less likely to be mown down in dismal light conditions. Adherence to fashion can be lethal. Remember when the silver/metallic grey hue was the only one available in cars? Well, mostly. The silver car against the grey road in a misty dawn/dusk, no lights of course, was always a gamble but, hell, gotta be hip."
Maggie reports from Sydney's Central Station: "I can see four white or cream puffer jackets, two mauve (one male wearer, one female) a leopard pattern, a blue camouflage-type pattern - and yes, lots of black and dark blue."
Vernon thinks winter is sombre enough without darkening it further with grim colours: "But its hard to find something colourful in the shops, so again fashion is forced upon us by the retailers and manufacturers."
"I remember as kids in Melbourne my grandmother used to wear non-conformist clothing," writes Paul. "Bright floral patterns. We thought it was a little eccentric. She later would wear her nightie when watering the garden. In her final years in the aged care home she would be found swinging on the clothesline naked with another lady. But I'm sure you'll be fine. Thoughts and prayers for John, everyone."
In defence of dark clothes, Chris points out that they absorb warmth when the sun is shining. And Heather writes: "Navy [and black] do not show the dirty marks they pick up on in public transport. And waterproof garments are much harder to clean than our regular clothes. Your bright yellow puffer jacket is great for country walks, but a few rides on our public transport system and it would not be so beautiful and yellow."
This is a sample of The Echidna newsletter sent out each weekday morning. To sign up for FREE, go to theechidna.com.au
I spent the night fantasising about catching the thief. I'd easily overpower him, of course. He wouldn't know what hit him. I'd smack him in the chops once or twice, truss him nice and tight with rope so rough it would leave burn marks and then call the cops.
That's the nice thing about fantasies. Old blokes with dodgy backs and arthritic shoulders are transformed into expert kung fu practitioners with supernaturally fast reflexes.
But as the evening wore on, the fantasy darkened. I'd delay that call to the police. First, I'd interrogate my whimpering victim. Make him squirm, even wet his pants. Find out where he lived. Promise I'd pay him another visit. Let him experience the vulnerability and fear he'd instilled in my daughter by stealing the spare keys and security swipe to her apartment.
She'd rung me earlier in tears. She lives alone. A locksmith wasn't available until the following day, and she feared the sound of her door lock being jiggled during the night. So I spent that night at her place, sharing her sense of being violated and consumed with thoughts of revenge.
The next da,y an email arrived from the CEO of Qantas, Vanessa Hudson, confirming I was among the 5.7 million Australians whose personal frequent flyer information had been compromised in yet another corporate data breach.
Cue another sleepless night fantasising about vengeance.
But this time it wouldn't just be the cyber criminals who hacked their way into a "third party platform" - a Qantas call centre in Manila - who would feel my wrath. Retribution would also be visited upon the entire corporate sector, whose negligence and penny-pinching continue leaving us exposed and vulnerable.
Barely a week passes without a major company releasing another slickly worded, legally vetted hollow apology confirming customer identities are floating around the dark web, available for purchase to the highest bidder, all courtesy of a failure to implement tighter security measures.
The latest Qantas breach isn't just another technical failure. It's symbolic of a wider rot that has crept into corporate culture - businesses refusing to grasp the obvious that investing heavily in robust encryption and state of the art security systems is a revenue-enhancing strategy, not a cost centre.
Data protection builds trust. Trust builds loyalty. Loyalty builds repeat business. It's the equivalent of food safety in restaurants. Poison a customer? You'll be closed down. Allow a customer's data to be stolen? Brand damage, expensive class actions and millions spent on marketing campaigns to rehabilitate your image follows.
How can businesses so focused on the bottom line not do their sums? And who else finds it ironic that at a time when consumers enjoy more power than ever - a critical or positive social media review can profoundly impact a business - we've never been treated more contemptuously?
Companies crave our personal information. They've called it "the new oil" for years. But we have seen so many breaches and resulting inconvenience for customers that a growing number of big businesses now look more like reckless prospectors, mining customers for their data with no concern for the consequences.
So here's what I've been fantasising about: governments, regulators and we - the customers - need to stop rewarding corporate complacency about data protection.
Tougher penalties must be imposed on companies who leave customer information exposed or stolen because of lax security measures. Executives and their boards should have remuneration and bonuses tied to the level of digital security they provide.
And it's more than time for governments to mandate tougher cybersecurity standards, not vaguely worded "best practice" measures that leave enormous wiggle room for businesses focused only on their bottom line.
Qantas should know better. Once a company with strong and emotional community ties, its reputation was shredded under the final years of former CEO Alan Joyce because of an obsessive focus on profits and investors.
Its email to millions of Australians showed it hasn't learned much. Almost half of it was devoted to a point-by-point lesson on how to "remain vigilant to any misuse of your personal information".
Let me add another suggestion. Quit the Qantas frequent flyer program. It's promoted as a loyalty feature but is clearly nothing more than a shoddily protected data-mining exercise.
It's one thing to have your keys stolen. It's another to leave your front door open to thieves.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Have you suffered because your personal data was stolen? Have you stopped dealing with companies that misuse your information? Should tougher penalties be introduced to penalise businesses with lax cybersecurity measures? Email us: [e-mail]
SHARE THE LOVE: If you enjoy The Echidna, forward it to a friend so they can sign up, too.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- Former federal Labor leader now NSW independent MP Mark Latham has been roundly condemned for allegedly photographing female MPs in the parliamentary chamber without their permission.
- The jobless rate has risen to 4.3 per cent, surpassing expectations, as the number of unemployed Australians jumped.
- A man has been charged with the theft of a car linked to several high profile violent incidents, including the alleged "politically motivated" firebombing of a Melbourne synagogue.
THEY SAID IT: "It takes 20 years to build a reputation and a few minutes of cyber-incident to ruin it." Stephane Nappo, French security expert.
YOU SAID IT: It was a small act of rebellion John didn't realise he was committing when he wore a bright yellow parka on a gloomy city day. In a sea of black puffer jackets, he broke the strict winter dress code.
"Be a mellow fellow in your yellow, John," writes David. "Donovan sang about 'Sunshine Superman', after all. Aside from the pleasant contrast with the dour, black puffer brigade, you are far less likely to be mown down in dismal light conditions. Adherence to fashion can be lethal. Remember when the silver/metallic grey hue was the only one available in cars? Well, mostly. The silver car against the grey road in a misty dawn/dusk, no lights of course, was always a gamble but, hell, gotta be hip."
Maggie reports from Sydney's Central Station: "I can see four white or cream puffer jackets, two mauve (one male wearer, one female) a leopard pattern, a blue camouflage-type pattern - and yes, lots of black and dark blue."
Vernon thinks winter is sombre enough without darkening it further with grim colours: "But its hard to find something colourful in the shops, so again fashion is forced upon us by the retailers and manufacturers."
"I remember as kids in Melbourne my grandmother used to wear non-conformist clothing," writes Paul. "Bright floral patterns. We thought it was a little eccentric. She later would wear her nightie when watering the garden. In her final years in the aged care home she would be found swinging on the clothesline naked with another lady. But I'm sure you'll be fine. Thoughts and prayers for John, everyone."
In defence of dark clothes, Chris points out that they absorb warmth when the sun is shining. And Heather writes: "Navy [and black] do not show the dirty marks they pick up on in public transport. And waterproof garments are much harder to clean than our regular clothes. Your bright yellow puffer jacket is great for country walks, but a few rides on our public transport system and it would not be so beautiful and yellow."
This is a sample of The Echidna newsletter sent out each weekday morning. To sign up for FREE, go to theechidna.com.au
I spent the night fantasising about catching the thief. I'd easily overpower him, of course. He wouldn't know what hit him. I'd smack him in the chops once or twice, truss him nice and tight with rope so rough it would leave burn marks and then call the cops.
That's the nice thing about fantasies. Old blokes with dodgy backs and arthritic shoulders are transformed into expert kung fu practitioners with supernaturally fast reflexes.
But as the evening wore on, the fantasy darkened. I'd delay that call to the police. First, I'd interrogate my whimpering victim. Make him squirm, even wet his pants. Find out where he lived. Promise I'd pay him another visit. Let him experience the vulnerability and fear he'd instilled in my daughter by stealing the spare keys and security swipe to her apartment.
She'd rung me earlier in tears. She lives alone. A locksmith wasn't available until the following day, and she feared the sound of her door lock being jiggled during the night. So I spent that night at her place, sharing her sense of being violated and consumed with thoughts of revenge.
The next da,y an email arrived from the CEO of Qantas, Vanessa Hudson, confirming I was among the 5.7 million Australians whose personal frequent flyer information had been compromised in yet another corporate data breach.
Cue another sleepless night fantasising about vengeance.
But this time it wouldn't just be the cyber criminals who hacked their way into a "third party platform" - a Qantas call centre in Manila - who would feel my wrath. Retribution would also be visited upon the entire corporate sector, whose negligence and penny-pinching continue leaving us exposed and vulnerable.
Barely a week passes without a major company releasing another slickly worded, legally vetted hollow apology confirming customer identities are floating around the dark web, available for purchase to the highest bidder, all courtesy of a failure to implement tighter security measures.
The latest Qantas breach isn't just another technical failure. It's symbolic of a wider rot that has crept into corporate culture - businesses refusing to grasp the obvious that investing heavily in robust encryption and state of the art security systems is a revenue-enhancing strategy, not a cost centre.
Data protection builds trust. Trust builds loyalty. Loyalty builds repeat business. It's the equivalent of food safety in restaurants. Poison a customer? You'll be closed down. Allow a customer's data to be stolen? Brand damage, expensive class actions and millions spent on marketing campaigns to rehabilitate your image follows.
How can businesses so focused on the bottom line not do their sums? And who else finds it ironic that at a time when consumers enjoy more power than ever - a critical or positive social media review can profoundly impact a business - we've never been treated more contemptuously?
Companies crave our personal information. They've called it "the new oil" for years. But we have seen so many breaches and resulting inconvenience for customers that a growing number of big businesses now look more like reckless prospectors, mining customers for their data with no concern for the consequences.
So here's what I've been fantasising about: governments, regulators and we - the customers - need to stop rewarding corporate complacency about data protection.
Tougher penalties must be imposed on companies who leave customer information exposed or stolen because of lax security measures. Executives and their boards should have remuneration and bonuses tied to the level of digital security they provide.
And it's more than time for governments to mandate tougher cybersecurity standards, not vaguely worded "best practice" measures that leave enormous wiggle room for businesses focused only on their bottom line.
Qantas should know better. Once a company with strong and emotional community ties, its reputation was shredded under the final years of former CEO Alan Joyce because of an obsessive focus on profits and investors.
Its email to millions of Australians showed it hasn't learned much. Almost half of it was devoted to a point-by-point lesson on how to "remain vigilant to any misuse of your personal information".
Let me add another suggestion. Quit the Qantas frequent flyer program. It's promoted as a loyalty feature but is clearly nothing more than a shoddily protected data-mining exercise.
It's one thing to have your keys stolen. It's another to leave your front door open to thieves.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Have you suffered because your personal data was stolen? Have you stopped dealing with companies that misuse your information? Should tougher penalties be introduced to penalise businesses with lax cybersecurity measures? Email us: [e-mail]
SHARE THE LOVE: If you enjoy The Echidna, forward it to a friend so they can sign up, too.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- Former federal Labor leader now NSW independent MP Mark Latham has been roundly condemned for allegedly photographing female MPs in the parliamentary chamber without their permission.
- The jobless rate has risen to 4.3 per cent, surpassing expectations, as the number of unemployed Australians jumped.
- A man has been charged with the theft of a car linked to several high profile violent incidents, including the alleged "politically motivated" firebombing of a Melbourne synagogue.
THEY SAID IT: "It takes 20 years to build a reputation and a few minutes of cyber-incident to ruin it." Stephane Nappo, French security expert.
YOU SAID IT: It was a small act of rebellion John didn't realise he was committing when he wore a bright yellow parka on a gloomy city day. In a sea of black puffer jackets, he broke the strict winter dress code.
"Be a mellow fellow in your yellow, John," writes David. "Donovan sang about 'Sunshine Superman', after all. Aside from the pleasant contrast with the dour, black puffer brigade, you are far less likely to be mown down in dismal light conditions. Adherence to fashion can be lethal. Remember when the silver/metallic grey hue was the only one available in cars? Well, mostly. The silver car against the grey road in a misty dawn/dusk, no lights of course, was always a gamble but, hell, gotta be hip."
Maggie reports from Sydney's Central Station: "I can see four white or cream puffer jackets, two mauve (one male wearer, one female) a leopard pattern, a blue camouflage-type pattern - and yes, lots of black and dark blue."
Vernon thinks winter is sombre enough without darkening it further with grim colours: "But its hard to find something colourful in the shops, so again fashion is forced upon us by the retailers and manufacturers."
"I remember as kids in Melbourne my grandmother used to wear non-conformist clothing," writes Paul. "Bright floral patterns. We thought it was a little eccentric. She later would wear her nightie when watering the garden. In her final years in the aged care home she would be found swinging on the clothesline naked with another lady. But I'm sure you'll be fine. Thoughts and prayers for John, everyone."
In defence of dark clothes, Chris points out that they absorb warmth when the sun is shining. And Heather writes: "Navy [and black] do not show the dirty marks they pick up on in public transport. And waterproof garments are much harder to clean than our regular clothes. Your bright yellow puffer jacket is great for country walks, but a few rides on our public transport system and it would not be so beautiful and yellow."
This is a sample of The Echidna newsletter sent out each weekday morning. To sign up for FREE, go to theechidna.com.au
I spent the night fantasising about catching the thief. I'd easily overpower him, of course. He wouldn't know what hit him. I'd smack him in the chops once or twice, truss him nice and tight with rope so rough it would leave burn marks and then call the cops.
That's the nice thing about fantasies. Old blokes with dodgy backs and arthritic shoulders are transformed into expert kung fu practitioners with supernaturally fast reflexes.
But as the evening wore on, the fantasy darkened. I'd delay that call to the police. First, I'd interrogate my whimpering victim. Make him squirm, even wet his pants. Find out where he lived. Promise I'd pay him another visit. Let him experience the vulnerability and fear he'd instilled in my daughter by stealing the spare keys and security swipe to her apartment.
She'd rung me earlier in tears. She lives alone. A locksmith wasn't available until the following day, and she feared the sound of her door lock being jiggled during the night. So I spent that night at her place, sharing her sense of being violated and consumed with thoughts of revenge.
The next da,y an email arrived from the CEO of Qantas, Vanessa Hudson, confirming I was among the 5.7 million Australians whose personal frequent flyer information had been compromised in yet another corporate data breach.
Cue another sleepless night fantasising about vengeance.
But this time it wouldn't just be the cyber criminals who hacked their way into a "third party platform" - a Qantas call centre in Manila - who would feel my wrath. Retribution would also be visited upon the entire corporate sector, whose negligence and penny-pinching continue leaving us exposed and vulnerable.
Barely a week passes without a major company releasing another slickly worded, legally vetted hollow apology confirming customer identities are floating around the dark web, available for purchase to the highest bidder, all courtesy of a failure to implement tighter security measures.
The latest Qantas breach isn't just another technical failure. It's symbolic of a wider rot that has crept into corporate culture - businesses refusing to grasp the obvious that investing heavily in robust encryption and state of the art security systems is a revenue-enhancing strategy, not a cost centre.
Data protection builds trust. Trust builds loyalty. Loyalty builds repeat business. It's the equivalent of food safety in restaurants. Poison a customer? You'll be closed down. Allow a customer's data to be stolen? Brand damage, expensive class actions and millions spent on marketing campaigns to rehabilitate your image follows.
How can businesses so focused on the bottom line not do their sums? And who else finds it ironic that at a time when consumers enjoy more power than ever - a critical or positive social media review can profoundly impact a business - we've never been treated more contemptuously?
Companies crave our personal information. They've called it "the new oil" for years. But we have seen so many breaches and resulting inconvenience for customers that a growing number of big businesses now look more like reckless prospectors, mining customers for their data with no concern for the consequences.
So here's what I've been fantasising about: governments, regulators and we - the customers - need to stop rewarding corporate complacency about data protection.
Tougher penalties must be imposed on companies who leave customer information exposed or stolen because of lax security measures. Executives and their boards should have remuneration and bonuses tied to the level of digital security they provide.
And it's more than time for governments to mandate tougher cybersecurity standards, not vaguely worded "best practice" measures that leave enormous wiggle room for businesses focused only on their bottom line.
Qantas should know better. Once a company with strong and emotional community ties, its reputation was shredded under the final years of former CEO Alan Joyce because of an obsessive focus on profits and investors.
Its email to millions of Australians showed it hasn't learned much. Almost half of it was devoted to a point-by-point lesson on how to "remain vigilant to any misuse of your personal information".
Let me add another suggestion. Quit the Qantas frequent flyer program. It's promoted as a loyalty feature but is clearly nothing more than a shoddily protected data-mining exercise.
It's one thing to have your keys stolen. It's another to leave your front door open to thieves.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Have you suffered because your personal data was stolen? Have you stopped dealing with companies that misuse your information? Should tougher penalties be introduced to penalise businesses with lax cybersecurity measures? Email us: [e-mail]
SHARE THE LOVE: If you enjoy The Echidna, forward it to a friend so they can sign up, too.
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- Former federal Labor leader now NSW independent MP Mark Latham has been roundly condemned for allegedly photographing female MPs in the parliamentary chamber without their permission.
- The jobless rate has risen to 4.3 per cent, surpassing expectations, as the number of unemployed Australians jumped.
- A man has been charged with the theft of a car linked to several high profile violent incidents, including the alleged "politically motivated" firebombing of a Melbourne synagogue.
THEY SAID IT: "It takes 20 years to build a reputation and a few minutes of cyber-incident to ruin it." Stephane Nappo, French security expert.
YOU SAID IT: It was a small act of rebellion John didn't realise he was committing when he wore a bright yellow parka on a gloomy city day. In a sea of black puffer jackets, he broke the strict winter dress code.
"Be a mellow fellow in your yellow, John," writes David. "Donovan sang about 'Sunshine Superman', after all. Aside from the pleasant contrast with the dour, black puffer brigade, you are far less likely to be mown down in dismal light conditions. Adherence to fashion can be lethal. Remember when the silver/metallic grey hue was the only one available in cars? Well, mostly. The silver car against the grey road in a misty dawn/dusk, no lights of course, was always a gamble but, hell, gotta be hip."
Maggie reports from Sydney's Central Station: "I can see four white or cream puffer jackets, two mauve (one male wearer, one female) a leopard pattern, a blue camouflage-type pattern - and yes, lots of black and dark blue."
Vernon thinks winter is sombre enough without darkening it further with grim colours: "But its hard to find something colourful in the shops, so again fashion is forced upon us by the retailers and manufacturers."
"I remember as kids in Melbourne my grandmother used to wear non-conformist clothing," writes Paul. "Bright floral patterns. We thought it was a little eccentric. She later would wear her nightie when watering the garden. In her final years in the aged care home she would be found swinging on the clothesline naked with another lady. But I'm sure you'll be fine. Thoughts and prayers for John, everyone."
In defence of dark clothes, Chris points out that they absorb warmth when the sun is shining. And Heather writes: "Navy [and black] do not show the dirty marks they pick up on in public transport. And waterproof garments are much harder to clean than our regular clothes. Your bright yellow puffer jacket is great for country walks, but a few rides on our public transport system and it would not be so beautiful and yellow."