Hint, hint: How to soft-launch bae, the right way
The term dates back to the Dark Ages, aka 2020. It first showed up in a since-deleted tweet by actor Rachel Sennott, who'd spotted the trend. The term borrows from tech companies, which release new devices and software – bugs and all – to a small audience before a formal roll-out. Done right, it's a subtle, confident, clear indicator that there's someone in your life. Executed poorly, it's a pile of mystery limbs, confusing captions and zero context. Here's how to do it right.
Tease your new relationship with just the shadow of your partner, or their shoes. (SHUTTERSTOCK)
Ease into it. Humans are in their oversharing era. So why go full PDA on a milestone that you're still figuring out too? If you've been single for a while, a soft launch also allows you time to adjust to your own change of status. Besides, half the fun is in drawing out the drama.
Announce the presence, not the person: If you two have vacationed together, have them pop up only as a shadow in your posts (You'll have to stage these. They'd better be on board with the crazy). Or get you and your SO in front of a mirror; you facing it, them with their back to it. Then, hold hands and take a selfie of your reflections. It shows all of you, but not all of them, keeping the mystery intact. If even one of you is the cheesy type (we're not judging) have their face obscured by a bunch of flowers. Big petals, people. Big petals!
Take tips. Zendaya and Tom Holland didn't post directly about each other for ages, but their comments and appearances in each other's stories started during the Spider-Man: Homecoming press tour in 2017. Tom tagged Zendaya in photos she wasn't even in. Smart fans picked up on the connection months before the paparazzi produced proof. Content creator (@NitibhaKaul) is currently on a vacation with someone. His face is hidden not just on her feed, but on his own too. Who is this guy? Nicely done, Nitibha!
Skip the clichés. Soft launches are subtle and sweet. Crucially, they're authentic to the new relationship. Being formulaic will give it away faster than you want. So, avoid heart bombing (suddenly liking and commenting on each other's posts). Go easy on posting random body parts – a hand here, a jawline there – this isn't an autopsy! And don't post romantic quotes with no context: Soulmates Always Find Each Other? Eww! No one wants to read between those lines.
When you're ready, make the reveal clear. Post a picture and tag them. Give people the deets. (SHUTTERSTOCK)
Keep them real. Once your audience is aware a certain someone exists in the background, let their personality show. Start posting about things they like that didn't make it to your feed before. Suddenly you're watching Korean body horror, posting Coldplay lyrics when your last caption was all Olivia Rodrigo. Your mutuals will soon start connecting the dots.
The final move. When you're ready, make the reveal clear. Post a picture with their face, tag them, use a caption that confirms what many may have already suspected. Don't be smug about it; everyone knew what you were up to all along, Sherlock.
Expect an aftermath. There will be questions. There will be surprise. Not everyone was clued to every hint you'd been dropping. For the most part, strangers on the internet want to know how long it's been going on and hoe serious it is. You don't owe the world a press release, but maybe a How We Met post might help. Just remember that your relationship, even if it fizzled out before the reveal, is your business. Avoid over-curating and over-explaining. If it feels like you're trying too hard, step back.
From HT Brunch, July 05, 2025
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