Lessons from ‘When Life Gives You Tangerines'

Observer

10-05-2025

'Psychologists believe that healing from trauma centres around regulating the central nervous system through rhythm, repetition and bodily safety'.
I have always found watching Korean dramas challenging, mainly because I could not remember the characters' names, but also because of the length of most series. However, when I started watching 'When Life Gives You Tangerine', I knew I would be hooked. The show centres around Ae-sun, who becomes an orphan at an early age and ends up living with her stepfather, helping him care for his two young children. Ae-sun is blessed by the love of her sweetheart 'Gwan-ski', a fisherman's son and her late mum's friends, who worked as divers 'Haenyeo' collecting molluscs and seaweed from the ocean and selling them in the village streets.
We also see 'Ae-sun's' paternal grandmother, despite being harsh on her at the start of the series giving up all her savings so 'Ae-sun' can buy a fishing boat. These acts of kindness are not limited to family members as we see the elderly landlords donate a portion of their rice secretly to Ae-sun so she can feed her small family.
The series gives a deeper insight into the psychology of loss, grief and resilience when staying still and weeping your pain is not an option. After losing their younger son in the storm 'Ae-sun' and 'Gwan-ski' keep on working day in and day out because life does not pause. They grieve differently hiding their guilt for not saving the young boy.
The psychologist Vessel van Der Lolk states in his book ' The Body Keeps the Score' that trauma recovery is rooted in the body and the mind and that healing from trauma centres around regulating the central nervous system through rhythm, repetition and bodily safety. We see the grieving couple indulging themselves in the daily routine of working and socialising with others.
The father is up every morning to catch fish from the ocean while his wife looks after the children, cooking for them and then going to work after sending them to school. The family could not afford to go off sick or pay for extensive therapy sessions. They simply had to keep working and carry on. The series shows how the geopolitical factors affect the daily lives of people in the village how social customs influence relationships and how paternal stubbornness and attitude towards those perceived to be from a lower social class deprive the younger generation from marrying their first love. We also see how social values change between generations with the new ones focusing on easy and quick ways of achieving wealth.
The series shows us how parents go a long way to provide for their children, giving up their dreams so their children can complete their education and have a better life. How parents continue to love and care for their children and grandchildren until they die and how love makes harsh days more bearable.
Unlike other TV dramas, 'When Life Gives You Tangerines' is about celebrating life with all its sweet and sorrowful moments holding on to hope and cherishing whatever life gives you.
BLURB
Unlike other TV dramas, 'When Life Gives You Tangerines' is about celebrating life with all its sweet and sorrowful moments holding on to hope and cherishing whatever life gives you.