
About Last Week: What Having A Meltdown Says About You As A Leader
In a sea of quiet leadership mantras and emotionless, direct communications, there exists another leadership style. One that is hyper authentic, effective and, yes, professional.
Leaders that deeply feel also have seats at the table and are often more connected, more open and far more collaborative than those at the table simply checking boxes.
A shared purpose and sense of belonging are great ways to empower team members, engage in constructive competition, and push outcomes from 'meh' to 'WOW!'
What might an occasional meltdown say about you?
You are human
It is okay to have moments. It is okay to lean into yourself. It is okay to free your mind and to release gaps in accountability, frustrating interactions and even misinterpreted slights.
Choosing the silent path forward, 'might seem like a good way to avoid conflict and emotional pain, but it usually comes back to bite you in the end,' shares Crystal Raypole in Healthline.
It doesn't do anyone any favors to suppress response.
While the workplace does not need toddler-like tantrums at every turn, in positions of leadership it is critical to model realistic response and prove that no one is immune from frustration and those frustrations can absolutely overwhelm any human being.
At times, we all could use help pushing through that noise. And sometimes pushing through requires noise.
You care
Emotions are integral in leadership. In fact, they can inspire others to drop set their masks aside and feel comfortable sharing their true selves.
Not caring results in status quo, low-to-no creativity and mostly, as the Talking Heads famously mused, 'same as it ever was.'
For optimum effectiveness, no matter the delivery tone, we want engaged, empathetic and authentic colleagues and leaders.
You let it out
If you don't allow yourself to let feelings come out, where do they go?
The answers are endless, however it's rarely a good thing to lock down emotions and empower them to fester.
Much like resentment, when not released, feelings grow exponentially. The last person you should allow to hold you back is you.
Why many work to remain emotionless
Is it better to offer your authentic self or a robotic shell to those in the workplace? When you fear the judgment of others, you cement your true self to a back burner, constantly needing to calculate each ensuing answer, conversation and opinion.
Fearing judgment imprisons a leader to accept boundaries as a rule of self. Blindly sticking within bounds stifles creative thinking, innovation and improvement.
"Some people may believe that showing negative emotions can lead to others seeing them as weak.'
According to Medical News Today, 'people may hide feelings to avoid showing weakness or vulnerability to others. Some people may believe that showing negative emotions can lead to others seeing them as weak.'
Having recently displayed a bit of an emotional meltdown (understatement of 2025), I asked the lucky recipient of my tirade, 'Does this make me come across as weak?' I simply had to ask. The response I received was, 'No! Quite the opposite!' He went on to detail how hiding feelings, especially when a boiling point has been reached, is unhealthy for all involved.
It's safer to present a stoic persona in the office. But is it realistic? Is it effective? Is it modeling strong leadership?
Are you really protecting yourself or are you trapping yourself in a pressure cooker? You can either choose when to blow or have it burst out when least expected.
The impact of burying emotions
Prioritizing archaic societal expectations over what is actually going on inside your mind and/or body can pack a punch. The negative impact from burying emotions takes a toll.
Bottling up feelings leads to stress, anxiety and unrealistic expectations of self.
If you are lucky enough to be surrounded by a strong team, proving a human response is survivable speaks volumes. You get to have your moments.
Bottling emotions can lead to chronic stress, which impacts the heart, body and mind. Dr. Colleen Mullen says, "The stress caused to the body can lead to increased diabetes and heart disease risks. Other effects can be memory difficulties."
Much like a ticking time bomb, letting the emotions out in bite-size bursts is far more manageable than one dramatic explosion.
It has been said that, 'authentic professional relationships are the heart of personal well-being, career growth, and fulfillment.'
It is impossible to build authentic, reciprocal relationships without sharing your own true self.
In a nutshell
Displaying emotional histrionics is rarely a great path, but, on occasion, embracing those escalated feelings and sharing them certainly lightens the weight of those emotions.
It's also an effective way to turn that societal frown upside down.
Normalizing differences in how colleagues deal with stress, cope with helplessness and lean into releasing that weight drives true acceptance that successful leadership can look and feel different.
Much like 'if you see something say something', find your outlets and, when overwhelmed, find those outlets and have support moving past the heavy thoughts and feelings. If your outlets are not comfortable working you through those moments, find other outlets.
Through reciprocal support comes authenticity, fresh ideas and continuously improved outcomes.
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