
How to manage money as a couple when you earn differently
B
y Stephanie Ferreira, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions
In many relationships, one partner earns more than the other. One may have taken a career break, started a business, faced retrenchment or simply be in a lower-paying profession. While this is completely normal, it can lead to resentment, guilt or confusion about what feels fair – especially when couples haven't discussed how to manage the imbalance.
With the right conversations, it is possible to balance income differences in a way that feels equal, empowering and practical for both partners.
The emotional side of earning differently
An income gap doesn't just affect the household budget – it can influence how each partner feels, behaves and communicates about money. One partner may feel guilty about spending money they didn't 'earn'. The higher earner may feel burdened by carrying most of the financial responsibility. The lower earner may feel 'less than' – even when contributing in other meaningful ways.
These dynamics aren't unusual. But they do highlight the need for honest, structured conversations about money and long-term goals. What feels fair is deeply personal, and there's no one-size-fits-all solution. What matters is that both partners are heard, involved and part of the plan.
What couples are doing in practice
In my experience as a financial planner, couples manage income differences in various ways. The most common approach is to split joint expenses proportionally to income. If one partner earns more, they contribute more. Whatever's left, each person uses for their own spending or saving.
Others prefer a straight 50/50 split, regardless of income. A few pool all their income into a shared account and pay both joint and individual expenses from there. This approach is less common and can be challenging to manage. It often requires careful budgeting and tracking, especially when it comes to things like debit orders, subscriptions or personal spending. On the opposite end, some couples don't know what the other earns – and avoid joint planning altogether.
Finding an approach that works for both of you
The most successful couples are those who have the conversation, agree on a structure that feels fair and review it regularly. Money is deeply personal, so what feels 'equal' to one couple may not feel that way to another.
Start with shared goals
Goals are a great way to align your thinking as a couple. Set short, medium and long-term goals together. Before you know it, you'll be talking about what matters most and how you want to prioritise your money.
Maybe the focus over the next year is travel and experiences. Or perhaps it's paying off debt, buying a new car or saving for a home. Talk about when you'd like to retire or whether one of you wants to take time off to study or start something new.
When both partners feel invested in the plan, money becomes something that brings you together – rather than something that causes stress or conflict.
Make the conversations easier
Money silence usually leads to money stress. Once your goals are clear, the conversations become easier. You're not just talking about numbers – you're talking about what matters to both of you.
Carve out time to discuss any concerns, ensure your spending plan aligns with your goals, agree on how expenses will be split, who's responsible for what and how often you'll check in.
A practical tip:
Set up a joint card or account for monthly shared expenses like groceries or eating out. Each partner contributes a set amount. It keeps the admin simple – and avoids the ongoing 'whose turn is it?' discussions.
Don't attach your worth to your income
Earning less (or not at all) doesn't mean contributing less. Raising children, supporting a partner's career or managing the home are all valuable contributions. The way you divide financial responsibilities should reflect that. Even if one partner earns significantly more, managing money should still be a shared responsibility.
Ensure both partners have financial security
If one partner takes a career break – to raise children, start a new venture or study – consider allocating a portion of savings or investments in their name. Long-term financial security should belong to both partners, not just the higher earner. The same applies if one spouse is earning significantly less. Think long-term and consider how the current arrangement fits into your broader financial picture.
When balancing different incomes in a relationship, the most important consideration is to engage in open and honest conversations. You don't need to earn the same to feel like equal partners. When both partners are involved, informed and secure, money becomes something you manage together – not something that comes between you. For more information, visit
Hashtags

Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles

The Herald
6 hours ago
- The Herald
Up to 50% of affluent South Africans' portfolios are held abroad, says FNB
More South Africans are looking to international banking to cushion themselves against global volatility, FNB says, as the bank marks the 10th anniversary of its international banking and savings operations in Guernsey. Speaking during the 10-year anniversary on Monday, CEO of FNB Guernsey Aneesa Razack said South Africans were increasingly looking to international banking as a hedge against market volatility, currency depreciation, geopolitical instability and changes in tax trends. 'Today, 30%-50% of affluent South Africans' portfolios are held abroad and we're witnessing a significant increase in clients seeking ways to externalise their wealth and hedge local risk without physically emigrating,' she said. Established to primarily service high-income and high-net-worth customers, FNB's business on the English Channel island has managed to acquire £1bn (R23.99bn) in deposits. Razack said Guernsey had evolved into a highly-respected, transparent and forward-looking centre for international companies. 'When we first set out on this journey, our ambition was simple, to help globally-minded Africans unlock the freedom of a financially-connected world. We believed then, as we do now, that going global should not be complicated or out of reach, but responsible, smart and within grasp for anyone with the vision to grow borders,' she said.


Mail & Guardian
09-07-2025
- Mail & Guardian
Is buying a rental property the right investment for you?
James Carvalho, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions. (Image: Chartered Wealth Solutions) B y James Carvalho, Director and Financial Planning Specialist at Chartered Wealth Solutions Over the years, I've often been asked if owning a rental property a good idea? The short answer is, it depends. The decision is rarely straightforward and should be made in consultation with your financial planner. The appeal of owning a tangible asset is strong, but many people dive in without considering the full picture. Before you invest, ask yourself: Do I have the financial means to purchase and maintain the property – especially if I need a bond, or will I be using after-tax savings? Is this property meant to be a lifestyle asset, part of my retirement plan or simply a surplus investment? This decision should be part of a well-thought-out financial plan. Here are my top five key considerations when buying a rental property: 1. Upfront costs are significant If you're buying an existing property, you'll need to pay transfer and bond registration costs – often a large upfront expense. These costs are not usually covered by the bank and must be funded with after-tax money. However, if you're buying off-plan (ie, from a developer), you typically avoid transfer costs. 2. Tax implications All rental income is fully taxable. When you eventually sell the property, you may also be liable for capital gains tax. Don't forget that if you're acquiring a property, you need to make sure your will is up to date or that you have one drafted. Property is a fixed asset and should be properly accounted for in your estate. 3. Tenant risk The income only works if your tenant sticks to the lease agreement. If the property is vacant, even briefly, you're still responsible for all the expenses, including the bond repayment. Consider how long you could carry those costs without rental income. 4. Growth and rental increases Ideally, your property should grow in value and act as an inflation hedge. But for it to truly work for you, the rental must be market-related and adjusted on the anniversary of the lease agreement. Many owners leave rental prices unchanged just to retain a 'good' tenant. While this may avoid hassles, it erodes the long-term value of the investment. Also, capital growth depends on location and market cycles. For example, between June 2023 and June 2024, the national average house price growth was just 3.2%. Cape Town was the top performer, while Gauteng experienced a decline of -1.1%. 5. Tenants can make or break the experience There's the dream tenant, one who pays on time, takes care of the place – and then there's the nightmare tenant, one who is constantly late and frequently damaging the property. Over time, even enthusiastic landlords may grow tired of managing the stress and maintenance of a rental property. Many of my older clients no longer have the energy for late-night calls to, and chasing rent from, tenants. What's the alternative ? If your interest lies more in property as an asset class than in being a hands-on landlord, there are other ways to invest: Property shares on the JSE or international exchanges. Property income unit trusts. REITs (real estate investment trusts), which offer exposure to commercial and industrial property without direct ownership hassles. These vehicles allow you to benefit from property market returns without managing tenants, maintenance costs or bond payments. Like all asset classes, property comes with risks – vacancy, unexpected costs and market volatility. Whether you're buying bricks-and-mortar or investing via the markets, make sure it aligns with your financial goals. Your financial planner can help you weigh the trade-offs and help you make a decision that's right for your life stage and investment strategy. For more information, visit


Mail & Guardian
02-07-2025
- Mail & Guardian
Few South Africans are planning to retire, survey shows
The high cost of living is making it difficult for people to save with many resigned to working into old age or relying on government grants. (Flickr) South Africans are not saving adequately for retirement, with many planning to depend on the government's old-age grant and to work as long as possible beyond their 60s in order to survive financially. This is according to the It exposes deep-seated anxieties facing workers and According to the survey, there has been a decline in retirement annuity contributions among middle-income earners from 51% last year to 34% in 2025 as debt and living costs take precedence. The middle class, in particular, expressed uncertainty about saving adequately, with many delaying contributions or dipping into savings prematurely. 'The gap between expectations and outcomes must be urgently addressed,' said Lytania Johnson, the chief executive of FNB's personal segment division. 'There is growing positive momentum in our industry and a visible shift from a 'one day' to a 'day one' mindset. We are seeing more South Africans recognising the need to plan and taking initial steps — but awareness without action won't secure the futures that people want.' According to the study, workers are starting to save at the age of 27 but many withdraw their retirement savings when they resign from their jobs to take up different posts. FNB private segment chief executive Sizwe Nxedlana said there were emotional and behavioural barriers to retirement planning. 'What's clear is that most people aren't ignoring retirement, they are just overwhelmed by it. The survey found that procrastination often stems from not knowing where to start,' he said. 'We see that people don't avoid planning because they don't care. They avoid it because it feels too big, too far away or too confusing. That's why we need to meet people where they are, with tools and advice that break things down and build momentum.' The survey uncovers persistent anxieties about rising living costs, future healthcare expenses and the longevity of savings. Younger respondents remain optimistic, expecting to replace 75% or more of their income in retirement, but older adults paint a bleaker picture. Many over-60s are working longer, cutting spending or relying on adult children, with some reporting isolation and regret over inadequate planning. Estate planning also reveals concerning gaps. A total of 60% of respondents have funeral cover and just 40% have a signed will, while one-third have not considered drafting one, often due to myths that wills are only for the wealthy. 'Funeral cover is almost universal in South Africa because people want to ease the immediate burden on family. But a will does that too — and more. It's not just for the wealthy. It's about protecting your family in the long term,' Nxedlana said. The introduction of the two-pot retirement system, allowing access to a savings portion of pension funds, has sparked mixed responses. Nearly 70% of respondents are aware of the system, and almost half claim to understand it, but less than a third have withdrawn from their savings pot. 'The concern is that, while the reform offers short-term relief, the savings pot could be seen as a default emergency fund rather than a tool for building future stability,' Nxedlana said. 'However, there is some cause for cautious optimism, since 43% of those who haven't withdrawn from their savings pot say they don't plan to, which points to an understanding of keeping their retirement savings intact over time.' The survey also signals a shift in retirement thinking, with over 50% of respondents expecting to supplement income through part-time work or side hustles. 'People aren't just looking for products, they're looking for options, guidance and a greater sense of control,' Nxedlana said. 'Bank platforms have surpassed social media and peer groups as the preferred source of retirement advice, with consumers demanding lower fees, user-friendly tools and better education.' Another worrying concern the survey revealed was a tendency to rely on the government's old-age pension, with 17% of respondents factoring this into their lack of retirement planning saying: 'Government grants will provide for me.'