I started a new job but a colleague who lost out on my role is cold and rude – what can I do?
Here, Karren gives advice to a reader who wants to get back into an in-house role after years of freelance work.
Q) I recently started a new job and everyone seems really nice, except for one woman who is at the same managerial level as me, but in a different department.
She has been very cold towards me, makes a point of speaking over me in meetings and is really abrupt whenever I talk to her.
A colleague mentioned this woman unsuccessfully applied for my role, so I wonder if that is what's fuelling this attitude.
I'm not sure what to do, as I don't want to make an enemy of her by going to HR, but I'm starting to dread coming into the office.
Do you have any advice?
Bella, via email
A) It's understandable that you're feeling uncomfortable – navigating tension with a colleague can be challenging, especially in a new role.
If her behaviour is being driven by disappointment over not getting the job, it's likely more about her than it is you.
Find a calm moment to have a direct but non-confrontational conversation, acknowledging any awkwardness and expressing a desire to work together professionally.
Approach her with empathy, while also setting clear boundaries.
Talk through examples of how her behaviour – such as not listening to your input, speaking over you in meetings and being abrupt – makes you feel undermined and disrespected.
Karren Brady is an 'ice queen' who ignores The Apprentice candidates - even when the cameras aren't rolling, claims ex-star
Also, give examples of interactions she has had with other colleagues, where she has been more respectful, to show her that the way she treats you is different.
Sometimes, simply addressing the tension can shift the dynamic.
Above all, protect your own wellbeing – no one should dread coming into work.
With time and professionalism, the situation may ease, especially as you establish yourself in your role.
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