What is ‘sleep divorce' — and why is this concerning trend becoming more popular?

New York Post

31-05-2025

There's been a dramatic spike in the number of couples agreeing to part ways in the bedroom as Australia's growing sleep crisis worsens.
New data shows that nearly one in three Australians are struggling to fall or stay asleep three or more times a week, sparking a rise in the number of couples who have embarked on a 'sleep divorce', opting to get their nightly rest in separate beds or rooms – despite ongoing stigma surrounding the decision.
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The research, conducted by leading sleep device manufacturer ResMed for its 2025 Global Sleep Survey, has revealed sleep deprivation is so bad that almost 1 in 5 (18 per cent) of Australians have called in sick.
6 Nearly one in three Australians are struggling to fall or stay asleep three or more times a week, leading to couples getting their nightly rest in separate beds or rooms.
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But shockingly, 41 percent of Aussies are choosing to 'just live with' the consequences of a bad night's kip, almost double the global average.
'This year's Resmed Global Sleep Survey found that the top factors causing Australians to have a poor night's sleep are stress (47 percent), followed by anxiety (42 percent) and financial pressures (26 percent),' Dr. Alison Wimms, Director of Medical Affairs for the company, told news.com.au.
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'Screen time, and inconsistent routines also widely affect sleep in Australia.'
6 41 percent of Aussies are choosing to 'just live with' the consequences of a bad night's kip, almost double the global average.
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Some of those not willing to put up with a poor night's sleep have decided to embark on a 'sleep divorce', with 61 percent of Aussies who have ditched their partner at bedtime reporting a better sleep quality.
'26 per cent said it improved their relationship, and almost 16 per cent noted a positive impact on their sex life,' Dr. Wimms added.
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'Sleeping separately can also improve sleep quality by reducing disturbances from different schedules, snoring, or movement during sleep.'
However sleeping separately does not work for everybody, with 38 percent of the 1 in 5 Australians who opted for a sleep separation – often due to snoring and restlessness – stating they felt their quality of sleep got worse or remained the same.
Alarmingly, almost 1 in 5 of those who have split up at night said they felt their relationship and sex life took a turn for the worse after sleeping apart.
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Sydney couple's therapist Shahn Baker Sorekli however warns that while a sleep separation 'can be helpful in some circumstances', he doesn't always recommend it.
6 According to a survey, 38 percent of the 1 in 5 Australians who opted for a sleep separation – often due to snoring and restlessness – said they felt their quality of sleep worsen or remained the same.
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'The main reason is coming together at the end of the night allows for a bit of a nice routine for the relationship where you can have a moment of connection and intimacy,' news.com.au's podcast, From the Newsroom.
'I'm not talking about, you know, long deepened meaningfuls in bed. It might just be a little snuggle, might just be reading next to each other, but kind of coming together at the end of the night.
'Being a couple, just unwinding is just a nice point of connection. And if you can maintain a good sleep routine together, it can just be really healthy for the relationship. So you close off the world, you in your room together, snuggling away.'
6 'If you can maintain a good sleep routine together, it can just be really healthy for the relationship,' couple's therapist Shahn Baker Sorekli says.
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The clinical psychologist, who authored relationship book The 8 Love Links, said that for those who find sleeping apart 'improves sleep quality it's absolutely a good idea'.
'For example, if one person is a really restless sleeper or somebody has a problem with snoring or perhaps somebody does shift work… and it going to add to the relationship tension, that's when it's a good idea,' he shared.
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'You've just got to be careful not to get into any kind of the pitfalls around it.
6 If sleeping together is 'going to add to the relationship tension, that's when it's a good idea,' Sorekli said about when it is appropriate for separate sleeping arrangements.
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Dr. Wimms noted that it is often women who report poorer sleep quality and higher rates of mood disruptions than men, explaining the gap was noticeable.
'38 per cent of Australian women struggle to fall asleep at least 3 nights a week, compared to 26 per cent of men,' she explained.
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'This is consistent with global numbers where we see women consistently report more sleep challenges. This may be due to hormonal changes through the month, caregiving responsibilities, or higher stress loads.
6 'We see women consistently report more sleep challenges. This may be due to hormonal changes through the month, caregiving responsibilities, or higher stress loads,' Dr. Wimms said.
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'While 4 in 10 Australian women say that their sleep is disrupted by their partner at least a few times a week, most often because of snoring or loud breathing, compared to 28 per cent of men.'
The report concluded that sleep has become the 'silent casualty of our busy modern lifestyles', noting the 'lines between work and home more blurred than ever'.
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Pressures such as the rising cost of living in Australia are also building, resulting in poor sleep across the nation.
But it's not all bad news, with ResMed stating that Australians have become more curious about how they sleep, with 33 percent monitoring their sleep, up from 18 percent last year.
'This increased curiosity, however, has revealed a gap in action with a staggering 41 per cent of Aussies saying they would just live with poor sleep,' Dr. Wimms said.
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'This is higher than the 22 per cent globally who indicated that they would do the same. This gap makes it vital for us to drive awareness of the importance of not just knowing, but taking action to improve your sleep health.
'This could be as simple as raising your sleep in a conversation with your healthcare provider or taking an online sleep assessment to learn more about what may be causing your poor sleep.'
Those who have spoken out in the past about the benefits of sleeping separately to their partner include Michael and Lisa Wipfli, Sunrise host Edwina Bartholomew and her husband Neil Varcoe as well as popular porn star Annie Knight who recently announced she sleeps in a separate bed to her new fiance Henry Brayshaw.