Time is running out for Clare McCann to cryogenically preserve her son who died by suicide last week
The devastated mother desperately trying to keep the lifeless body of her 13-year-old boy preserved so he can 'come back to life' and see the world is not such a 'cruel, horrible place' - and people really do love him.
With just 48 hours left to raise $300,000 for cryopreservation, McCann is acutely aware she might miss the crucial time window, and the thought of what to do next is debilitating.
'I've been sitting there with him in the morgue just kissing him, realistically from Thursday I know I should be putting him in a fully synthetic sleeping bad and putting ice packs surrounding him at the minimum to have any kind of chance but I just don't want to disturb him if this is all for nothing,' McCann told news.com.au
Watch McCann's heartbreaking plea in the video player above
'I mean, I want him back, but at the same time, the ice will disfigure him so if I can't use the cryopreservation technology how do I do that to my baby? I can't do that to my beautiful baby.
'If this doesn't work, if I can't raise the money to do this then I can't even think about what's next, a cemetery … I can't even.'
McCann was gutted to find her only child Atreyu had died by suicide on Friday after several months of relentless bullying at high school.
She said his tormentors held his head under water at school camp, taunted him with name calling, drew pictures on his arms and generally 'made him miserable and withdrawn' to the point he had stayed home from school for the last four weeks.
McCann says she wishes she had never sent him to high school.
'Bullies need to be stopped, the system needs to be fixed, this cruel behaviour that goes on it has to stop and schools have to take it seriously and until they do, every child should be home-schooled,' she said.
'I feel so guilty I sent him. Adults need to stand up and fix the system. But how can I fight to save other kids if I can't even save my own child. I need to save him right now that's all I can think about.'
McCann has raised almost $12,000 of the $300,000 she needs to have a shot at preserving Atreyu's body.
The little boy, named after the hero in The Neverending Story, had talked about the prospect of 'being frozen' when he dies and coming back in the afterlife with his mum.
'We talked about swimming in the ocean, then we joked, no we might get eaten by sharks, so then we thought about coming back as birds and flying together.
'The thought of being able to bring him back gives me something to hang on to. Without that I literally have nothing.'
As the hours ticked by this week, and hopes faded for a millionaire with an interest in science coming forward to help fund the cryopreservation, McCann sat with her boy and read him his favourite book.
'I brought him The Neverending story today to read to him in the morgue because we never finished it,' she said.
'It's so sad because the last time we read it was probably two, three weeks ago and we got up to a horrible bit and that's where it was left. So I thought 'I need to take you out of that bit' so I read to him past that bit and beyond. Now I just have to do everything I can to give him a chance to come back.'
McCann is hurt by the horrible comments on social media about her plight.
'People are making comments saying I'm entitled, I'm an actress, I'm worth $2 million. I shake my head, I've been a volunteer for the last 10 years, and home-schooling my son. I've never even made like half a million in my life.
'If people don't want to donate or don't agree with what I'm doing then scroll on, why do they have to be so horrible?'
Comments like 'what if your son wakes up and you've already passed?' are also hurtful.
'If my son's in cryo, I'm going into cryo. Do you think I'm just gonna let him wake up by himself to his misery? No. And even if I don't make it, I've got friends who've said they'll commit and they'll do it.
'I want him to wake up and see the world can be more kind, and he can get the proper help he needs in a mental health care facility. He can have a second chance.'
Founder of Southern Cryonics Peter Tsolakides told news.com.au time was fast running out for McCann but he was doing everything possible to help.
'We have already lost valuable time so the conditions are not optimal for success for Clare's boy, but no one ever knows, we will help her in whatever way we can. All the members here feel so sorry for what she's gone through,' Mr Tsolakides said.
Southern Cryonics is a not-for-profit enterprise and the first cryonics storage facility in the southern hemisphere.
Based in Holbrook, it currently houses one body, although more than 40 people have already signed up to go through the process when they die.
'What normally happens is we would have come into contact with the person before death, a medical team would visit the hospital and there is monitoring by the emergency response team until legal death is pronounced,' Mr Tsolakides said.
'It's a complicated process but already, with the time delay, we have missed important steps in cooling the body at the pace we need to keep the brain at optimal health.
'What this process is really about is keeping the brain healthy so that one day when science and medicine catches up, the body is ready for what's next,' he said.
Agreeing it is still unknown whether anyone preserved this way can ever be revived, Mr Tsolakides said everyone who has signed up to have their body suspended knows science is a long way behind but it's about 'giving yourself the best chance'.
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