TV teen who needed French polisher in Yellow Pages ad unrecognisable 34 years on
Before the rise of the internet, we had the Yellow Pages, a comprehensive directory of local businesses – from advice centres to zoos – all vying for your custom, packaged in a hefty, distinctively coloured phone book. In the 1990s, the Reading-based company became famous for its unforgettable TV adverts, each new release bringing a buzz of anticipation akin to the unveiling of a new John Lewis Christmas advert today.
These TV commercials even turned their stars into temporary celebrities, long before the era of reality TV, and gave birth to several catchphrases. Anyone around at the time will easily remember the Yellow Pages ad featuring elderly man searching for a book titled Fly Fishing by J R Hartley, with the surprising twist that it was Mr Hartley himself seeking his old publication.
There was also the cheeky young lad standing on a stack of Yellow Pages to sneak a kiss under the Christmas mistletoe. And in 2003, Cold Feet actor James Nesbitt was enlisted to rejuvenate the brand, with the actor channelling his character Adam's hapless persona from the show, using the Yellow Pages to navigate tricky situations.
But one of the most memorable adverts, first aired in 1991, featured a shaggy-haired teenager waking up on his living room floor after hosting a house party while his parents were away. Venturing into a bedroom, he stumbles upon a stranger on the bed, exclaiming: "Wake up! My parents fly back today," as a small group hastily tidies up the house. Then after his abject horror at noticing a scratch on a wooden table, he turns to the reliable Yellow Pages to find a solution.
"Hello, French polishers?" he enquires over the phone, adding: "It's just possible you could save my life." The scratch is skilfully polished away in the nick of time and everything seems fine, until the final moment when the unfortunate lad realises that someone has doodled a beard and glasses onto a woman on one of the family's treasured paintings.
The teenager in the advert was portrayed by Nottingham actor Simon Schatzberger, who later played Adrian Mole in a stage production in London's West End, and has since appeared as a Woody Allen-esque character in a stand-up comedy show.
Now aged 57, he's also had a stint as David Klarfeld on the BBC soap Doctors and made appearances in EastEnders as a Rabbi, both in December 2018 and again in January 2019. His other television roles include Band Of Brothers, Daniel Deronda and Father Brown.
In 2019, Yellow Pages announced it would cease printing its iconic directories, after more than half a century. The final editions of the once-indispensable guide were delivered in Brighton, the city where the directory's original copies were distributed.
It boasted 104 editions, each customised to specific areas of the UK, with nearly 23 million copies circulated each year. And in 2023, a perfume was launched that even smelled like Yellow Pages, proving the brand lives on... sort of.
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