Alex Johnston is about to become rugby league's Don Bradman
Old records are usually broken by a statistical advantage of later eras: modern players often get more chances and more games to pile up whatever stats they need. But Johnston's try-scoring rate is almost identical to Irvine's. This is the most astonishing of all his statistics. Irvine played 236 first-grade games, and Johnston has played 237. In game No.234, he crossed the line four times against Melbourne. Souths, inevitably in this season when Johnston has played outside fill-ins and makeshifts, lost the game.
The one advantage Johnston has had over Irvine is the NRL's sensible rule change, back in 2010, to make the corner post inside rather than outside the field of play. It has enabled wingers to score tries that would have been disallowed before 2010.
Similar to Irvine, on the other hand, Johnston's career winning rate is 57 per cent, well below those of Slater, Lamb and Menzies. He started out in Souths' feeder team in 2013 – which was, appropriately, North Sydney. His debut first-grade season was Souths' 2014 premiership-winning campaign, but he hasn't spent his career sitting pretty outside Greg Inglis.
Latrell Mitchell and Cody Walker have done their bit, but Johnston manages to get the ball in space in even the weakest Bunnies teams. The Sydney Roosters coach, Trent Robinson, raised a few eyebrows this week when he kept going on about 'Roosters footy' – whatever that is, some kind of 'brand' – but there's no jargon or kidology about what 'Rabbitohs footy' is: just get the ball out to the left wing.
This week, Johnston has signed a two-year extension with Souths, meaning that in all likelihood he will turn an 'Irvine' into a 'Johnston'. He's still only 30 years old. In our lifetimes, it's impossible to imagine anyone reaching the mid-200s he is sure to retire with. Daniel Tupou, who on Friday moved into fourth place on the all-time list, is four years older than Johnston.
The magnitude of Johnston's achievement is a thing of wonder. The question remains how rugby league will celebrate. They'll have to be ready with the balloons and streamers. Please don't let them spoil the moment with Sweet Caroline. This one is unique.
Happily, Johnston has turned his left wing into a quiet space where the only enemies he has made in rugby league are the touch judges. His indigenous heritage means his record will offer a special inspiration beyond the rectangle of play. Johnston also has Lumi ancestry from Papua New Guinea, and if he's not still playing when the PNG team enters the NRL, he will be offered an ambassadorial role.
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Which is to say, in the weekly reality show that the NRL can be, the Irvine becoming the Johnston will be one of those beautiful moments to just stop, stand, and applaud. Here is someone who has truly let his footy do the talking.
The day it happens, whoever is at the ground should be allowed to leap the fences, charge on and mob him in the way that Lockett was back in 1999 and Lance Franklin was when he went past 1000 goals in 2022. The field invasion is a thing of the past, and security guards tackle better, some days, than Souths' current middle forwards. But the joy of this record should be allowed to overflow. It won't happen again while any of us are alive.

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