Friends: Beyond the Differences
JAPAN Forward has launched "Ignite," a series to share the voices of students in Japan in English. What do they see beyond our differences? Individually and collectively, today's students will shape our global future. Let's listen.
This third essay introduces another winning work of the Institute for International Business Communication (IIBC) high school student English essay contest. In the following essay, high school student Anna Koga recounts the hurt she felt when her friend's way of saying goodbye wasn't as intense as her own. She recalls in an essay the emotional experience of learning to understand the differences among friends and overcoming the hurt.
Third in the Series, 'Ignite'
"Thank you for everything," I said, holding back tears, "I will never forget the amazing days I spent with you." I stood in front of the security gate in Pittsburgh International Airport. "I'm going to... miss you... so much," I managed to say between sobs. Clear sky, fresh air and a nice smell of morning coffee. Everything was too perfect to say goodbye to Cathy, my host sister.
It wasn't our first goodbye. A year earlier, Cathy came to my house in Japan as a homestay student. Following a wonderful week, she went back home to Pittsburgh, after which our friendship grew.
Filled with emotions, welling up with tears, I waited for her to say something. Compared to me crying my eyes out, she had a much brighter outlook on our parting. "Yeah," she chirped, "but I can't wait to see you again! Have a safe flight, Anna!"
A quick hug and she gently urged me to go to the gate. Anna Koga is the winner of the IIBC Grand Prize (2024).
If I am being honest with myself, and you the reader, I was disappointed. I had always believed that it is only polite to follow the Japanese cultural custom of nagori oshimu ― saying goodbye reluctantly. I expected her to be just as reluctant. When I was walking into the line at the gate, my head filled with many questions. "Isn't she sad that I'm leaving? Won't she miss me even a little? Did I do something wrong?" I turned to see her face, but she was gone.
Even after three in-flight movies and a long, restless nap on the airplane, I was still thinking about this ordeal. Perhaps she wasn't very moved because she no longer cared about me.
But as soon as I touched down, she texted me "I miss you so much already!"
Why now?!
After some research online, I found that many fellow Japanese have been in the same situation. Not only that, but I also read a blog written by an American woman living in Japan, introducing her experiences of parting with Japanese friends.
What surprised me more was that she felt very awkward when Japanese showed reluctance to leave. This reminded me of [Geert] Hofstede's cultural dimensions theory on differences in cultures across countries and how those relate to values and behavior. According to the theory, Japan is a collectivistic country, meaning that people value connections and crave sustained connections with others. This accounts for the nagori oshimu custom. It is a display of our wish to remain together. In contrast, countries like America are individualistic, and people value independence.
It might be true that cultural differences lead people to have different values. This past year, my host sister didn't text me as much as my other long-distance friends. Despite this, I neither think she doesn't care about me, nor do I believe people in individualistic countries don't care. When telling her that economics would prevent me from being able to visit her as I had planned, her family agreed to let me stay at her house.
She then planned the entire trip for me. She took me to many places and let me try anything I wanted. She stuck by my side and introduced me to her amazing friends. Why would she have done this if she didn't care about me?
Regardless of the culture, everyone has their own life to live and their own sense of values to guide them. Having the exact same sense should not be the thing that maintains a friendship. If what you and your friends value the most is different, even if that changes, the memories of the good times you spent together stay. And that's all you need to stay connected.
I'm sure that I will have various people as my friends, and it may not be easy for me or them to keep in touch. When that time comes, I will remember my experiences throughout each friendship.
And in the end, even if Cathy doesn't cry, you can be sure that I will.
Anna Koga is a student at Saitama Municipal Omiya International Secondary School. Upon receiving the IIBC Grand Prize, she stated:
"I am very honored to receive the Grand Prize.
"This essay is about the differences in values I experienced when interacting with my American friends, and the frustration I felt about it. While writing the essay, I thought about the relationship between differences in values and friendship, and was able to find my own answer to the question, 'What is needed for friendship that transcends differences?'
"I would like to continue to build rich human relationships by interacting with people from all over the world, without being bound by 'differences.'
In particular, I would like to express my sincere gratitude to my teachers who taught me and to all the judges.
Author: Anna Koga
Saitama Municipal Omiya International Secondary School
このページを 日本語 で読む
Hashtags
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Winnipeg Free Press
2 hours ago
- Winnipeg Free Press
Music Review: English post-punks Wet Leg level up on sophomore album, ‘Moisturizer'
A few songs into the second studio album from buzzy English post-punks Wet Leg, singer Rhian Teasdale yells 'level up!' And level up they have. The alt-rock duo-turned-group took their time to complete their sophomore release, titled 'Moisturizer.' It was worth the wait. The album is a terrific soundtrack for a long, hot summer. The Grammy Award-winning Wet Leg emerged from England's Isle of Wight in 2021 with the quirky viral hit, 'Chaise Lounge,' which released before they had ever performed live. The song immediately charmed audiences, a cheeky track centered on Teasdale's deadpan delivery and guitarist Heather Chambers' chunky, jagged bursts. They grew from there, releasing a self-titled debut album in 2022 that rose to the top of the UK charts. On 'Moisturizer,' the two have greatly expanded their skills and range. But they've also retained the raunchy, goofy energy that gained them an adoring audience. The new version of Wet Leg is no longer just a duet. Their touring band, bassist Ellis Durand, drummer Henry Holmes and guitarist/synth-player Joshua Mobaraki have formally joined the project and share writing credit on several songs. The expanded band complements Chambers' oddball progressions and facilitates a bigger, more layered sound. The opening track, 'CPR,' opens with Holmes' drums and Durand's funky bassline before the guitars come in. The band can now groove as well as grind. The lyrics capture the silliness and dead seriousness of a bruising crush. Playing the dispatcher, Chambers asks, 'Hello? 999. What's your emergency?' Teasdale answers, 'Well… the thing is… / I… I… I… I… I… / I'M IN LOVE.' Across the album, there are plenty of tracks that work to rattle car speakers and dominate summer festival mainstages. On the belligerent single 'Catch These Fists,' Teasdale declares, 'I don't want your love / I just wanna fight.' On 'Pillow Talk,' Teasdale coos over an industrial metal drone and delivers some of the horniest lyrics in the band's notably graphic catalog. The slower songs show off the band's new tools. 'Davina McCall,' named after the English television presenter, begins bendy with some oddball chord changes and surprisingly delicate vocals. The slow jam '11:21' could sit next to the soft singer-songwriter Weyes Blood on a playlist. 'Don't speak,' written and sung by Chambers, channels the bluesy energy and corny-sweet lyrics of late Replacements. In total, Wet Leg — now a full band — has a fuller sound. Fans will be wise to join them on the journey. ___ More AP reviews:
Vancouver Sun
5 hours ago
- Vancouver Sun
Sushi and street-style vibes: Two chefs with total of four Michelin stars team up in Toronto
At $125 a pop, tickets for Masaki Saito's Toronto collaboration dinner with Nozomu Abe of New York City's Sushi Noz sold out in less than 30 minutes . The appeal isn't a surprise. Saito and Abe, who are from the same small coastal Hokkaido town, have four Michelin stars between them. And then there's the relative affordability. An omakase dinner at Sushi Masaki Saito , Canada's only restaurant to hold two Michelin stars , costs $780. On July 4 and 5 at MSSM Ossington , 144 guests saw the celebrity chefs in action. And, in a patriotic twist, in contrast to their Michelin-starred establishments, which use almost exclusively imported Japanese ingredients, Canadian products loomed large. Saito estimates that 95 per cent of the ingredients at Sushi Masaki Saito are Japanese; Abe uses 99 per cent imported products at Sushi Noz. At MSSM, where Saito's students execute his Edomae-style omakase menu for $98 per person, they typically use 50/50 imported and local ingredients. Saito and Abe tipped the Canadian balance even further for their collaboration dinner, saying that only seasonings such as soy sauce and vinegar were from Japan. Discover the best of B.C.'s recipes, restaurants and wine. By signing up you consent to receive the above newsletter from Postmedia Network Inc. A welcome email is on its way. If you don't see it, please check your junk folder. The next issue of West Coast Table will soon be in your inbox. Please try again Interested in more newsletters? Browse here. The 11 courses included silky B.C. spot prawns cured in kelp and delicate hay-smoked oysters dusted with dill, Nova Scotia lobster with Ontario eggplant and a refreshing vinegar jelly, and a five-ingredient chilled Ontario corn purée. 'I never touch local American ingredients. When I touched the Canadian local ingredients, it was so good,' says Abe. While a hinoki wood counter cut from a 200-year-old tree and traditional Japanese woodwork define the room at Sushi Masaki Saito, MSSM Ossington is another story. The restaurant is covered in vibrant graffiti by Vancouver-based artist Chairman Ting . At the collaboration dinner I attended on July 5 (the first of three sittings), a DJ spun 1990s and early 2000s hip-hop as guests clinked beers over the two 12-seat sushi bars with Saito and Abe: 'Kampai!' Saito had long envisioned this fun atmosphere, he tells me. 'Five seats, four seats in the club, was my high school dream.' With MSSM's high ceilings, colourful graffiti stylings and pulsing music, he realized it. 'A street-style club inside a sushi restaurant is special,' says Saito. Abe agrees. The Michelin Guide described his namesake New York sushi restaurant as a 'sacred space, where every detail recreates an intimate Japanese refuge.' The atmosphere of the collaboration dinner was a marked change. 'My restaurant has no music, and it's very quiet. People focus on the food. Everyone is quiet,' says Abe. 'But this restaurant has big vibes.' Whether his three MSSM locations (including one in Edmonton ) or newest Toronto spot, Ramen Tabetai (where they make just enough rich, pork broth for 100 Jiro-style bowls per day, selling for $22.88), Saito highlights that his primary motivation for opening restaurants isn't monetary. 'Money is (further) down. First and second priorities are: I want to eat; I want to go. It's a very simple reason.' The restaurants Saito craved didn't exist, he adds, 'So, I made them myself.' Since Saito moved to Toronto in 2019, after running the counter at the two-star Sushi Ginza Onodera on Fifth Avenue in New York City, he says the culinary scene has changed 'little by little.' New York's evolution may be faster, but he thinks its growth has almost reached the ceiling. 'Canada has more space,' says Saito. 'Canada has potential.' His vision for Japanese cuisine in Canada doesn't include any more sushi spots. 'We did that already,' he adds. 'I want to open a tempura and a yakitori. More Japanese cuisine techniques.' Saito says many Japanese restaurants operate at the mid-level in Canada. Unlike New York, which has the likes of the Michelin-starred Tempura Matsui and Torien , specializing in binchotan-cooked skewers, the high-end is lacking. 'If we open, I want to open (a Michelin-level restaurant). No competition. Blue ocean.' He already has his sights set on Western Canada (Calgary and Vancouver specifically), but any future projects would open in Toronto first, with an increased focus on Canadian products. Sushi Masaki Saito aside, which he sees continuing to use predominantly Japanese ingredients, in the wake of U.S. President Donald Trump's tariffs and trade war, Saito is pushing more local products at his other restaurants. 'They should use Canadian products more and more. And then more Canadian pride, like this,' he says, tapping his Sushi Masaki Saito chef's jacket with the Japanese and Canadian flags side by side. Saito notes that he didn't put an American flag on his chef's whites when he worked in New York City. (However, if it ever came down to Canada versus Japan, his allegiance lies with Japan, 'of course.') He points out that many people go to Japan to learn how to brand and care for food products so they fit into the premium category. (Witness the $120 melon or $325 strawberry .) 'Louis Vuitton, Tiffany, they know branding. So Canadian products — pork, chicken, everything — more high-brand, Canadian pride, please.' Saito says it isn't necessarily a question of one nation's products being better than another's. Factors such as the weather, temperature, humidity, the environment and nature all impact the quality. The Canadian products he considers the most promising include oysters, lobsters, spot prawns and sea urchins, which people already consider luxuries. He uses sea urchin companies as an example, which he thinks have the potential to build a brand that captures high-end chefs' attention at home and abroad. 'Then, in 50 years, after we die, maybe the Canadian sea urchin (will be) very famous in the world. They should do it because the Canadian sea urchin is good. Canadian lobster is good. The Canadian oyster is good. Very good, good, good.' Our website is the place for the latest breaking news, exclusive scoops, longreads and provocative commentary. Please bookmark and sign up for our cookbook and recipe newsletter, Cook This, here .
Winnipeg Free Press
7 hours ago
- Winnipeg Free Press
Wrexham lands Down Under for preseason tour and welcomed as a ‘hot ticket' in world soccer
Wrexham, the Welsh soccer team co-owned by 'Deadpool' actor Ryan Reynolds, has arrived Down Under for its latest preseason tour overseas — and where more apt to start than Marvel Stadium. The Wrexham squad has landed in Melbourne for the first of three tour games to get ready for a first season in 43 years in English soccer's second tier, having just secured a third straight promotion. Playing in Australia and New Zealand — after recent preseason tours to the United States — is part of an effort to spread Wrexham's global footprint that has been supercharged by the popular 'Welcome to Wrexham' fly-on-the-wall documentary. 'We want the lads to enjoy these games and the experience,' Wrexham manager Phil Parkinson said after arriving in Melbourne. 'Everyone has to raise their game in all areas,' he added about Wrexham's recent growth, 'and that's what it is all about. There's a huge passion from our supporters in Wrexham and I can imagine there'll be a lot of bleary-eyed supporters staying up through the night to watch the games.' After playing Melbourne Victory at Marvel Stadium on Friday, Wrexham takes on Sydney FC on Tuesday and Wellington Phoenix in New Zealand on July 19. Winnipeg Jets Game Days On Winnipeg Jets game days, hockey writers Mike McIntyre and Ken Wiebe send news, notes and quotes from the morning skate, as well as injury updates and lineup decisions. Arrives a few hours prior to puck drop. 'We're not here on a holiday,' Wrexham captain James McClean said. 'It's great to come and see new things, new experiences but we're here to work, we're here to prepare for the new season. It's going to be the toughest challenge yet, by far.' Melbourne Victory coach Arthur Diles said playing the team owned by Reynolds and fellow Hollywood star Rob McElhenney is a chance for his own club 'to grow our brand and the football market of Australia internationally.' 'Wrexham's a hot ticket at the moment in world football,' he told News Corp. Australia. ___ AP soccer:
