15 Reasons You Feel Like You're In A 'Situationship' With Your Own Husband
When was the last time you had a heart-to-heart conversation with your husband that wasn't about logistics or what's for dinner? If your discussions rarely stray beyond the mundane, you might be in a situationship. The spontaneity and depth that once characterized your conversations have given way to a perfunctory exchange of words. It's as if you're roommates rather than partners in life.
According to Dr. Andrea Bonior, a clinical psychologist and author of "The Friendship Fix," the absence of meaningful communication can be a red flag. She explains that when couples cease to share their inner thoughts and feelings, they risk drifting apart emotionally. Without regular, open dialogue, even the strongest bonds can grow tenuous. It's essential to prioritize intentional communication to maintain a genuine connection.
Remember those early days when any moment could be an opportunity for romance? If flowers or surprise date nights have become relics of the past, you might be in a situationship. It's not just about grand gestures; even the smallest acts of love have vanished into thin air. When romance becomes an afterthought, your relationship might be treading on thin ice.
The absence of romance can signal a disconnect between partners, where complacency replaces genuine affection. It's easy to fall into routines that eschew the excitement of yesteryear, but it's harder to reignite the spark once it's gone. A lack of romance can gradually erode the emotional foundation of your relationship. You both deserve to feel cherished and desired, not just tolerated.
If you and your husband operate in distinctly separate social circles, you may find yourself feeling like more of an acquaintance than a partner. This division can gradually lead to a sense of isolation within your marriage. Shared experiences and mutual friends help solidify a partnership, fostering a sense of unity. Without these connections, it's easy to feel like two ships passing in the night.
A 2018 study conducted by the University of Kansas found that couples who share social networks tend to experience stronger relational satisfaction. Lead researcher Dr. Jeffrey Hall noted that shared friendships can act as a buffer against relationship stress. When your social lives don't intersect, you're missing out on opportunities to strengthen your bond through shared experiences. It might be time to bridge that gap and find common ground.
Do you sidestep the tough talks, hoping they'll resolve themselves? Avoiding conflict may provide temporary peace, but it can also create a situationship within your marriage. When important issues are swept under the rug, resentment and misunderstanding are likely to fester. Healthy relationships require confronting challenges head-on, no matter how uncomfortable.
The avoidance of difficult conversations can lead to emotional distance and decrease intimacy. It's a temporary fix that doesn't address the underlying issues threatening your bond. By fostering an environment where open dialogue is encouraged, you're more likely to maintain a strong, supportive partnership. Remember, the best relationships are built on honesty and trust, not avoidance.
Do you find yourself going through the motions without any real thought or intention? Living on autopilot can make your marriage feel more like a business arrangement than a loving partnership. When you're only half-present, your emotional connection becomes a casualty. This detachment can gradually erode the intimacy and understanding that once defined your relationship.
According to relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, one of the predictors of relationship dissatisfaction is a lack of emotional presence. Being present means tuning into your partner's needs and emotions, not just being physically there. When you're in autopilot mode, you miss the subtle cues that are essential for maintaining a thriving relationship. To combat this, practice intentionality in your interactions, ensuring your actions align with your intentions.
When was the last time you shared a moment of real intimacy? The absence of physical closeness might signify you're drifting into a situationship with your husband. It's not just about sex, but about feeling connected and valued through touch and affection. Without it, the emotional connection can wither, leaving resentment in its place.
Physical intimacy is more than a mere expression of love; it's a vital component of a healthy relationship. It fosters a sense of belonging and reinforces the emotional bonds between partners. When intimacy evaporates, it can feel like you're living with a stranger. Rebuilding this aspect of your relationship requires effort and vulnerability, but the payoff is a renewed sense of connection.
If it feels like you and your husband are always on different pages, this misalignment could indicate a situationship. When your goals and priorities diverge, it can feel as if you're living separate lives. Shared values and aspirations are crucial for maintaining a united front. Without them, the foundation of your relationship can start to crack.
A survey by the Pew Research Center highlighted that shared priorities are essential for relationship satisfaction. Researcher Dr. Juliana Horowitz emphasized that couples who align in their goals and values report higher levels of happiness. It's crucial to regularly check in with each other to ensure your priorities are still in sync. This alignment creates a sense of partnership and purpose within the marriage.
When was the last time you discussed the future with your spouse? If long-term plans are never on the table, you may be navigating a situationship. Without shared dreams and aspirations, a relationship can become stagnant. Future planning is an investment in your partnership, signaling commitment and shared purpose.
The absence of future discussions can indicate a lack of direction and shared vision. Planning together creates anticipation and excitement, reinforcing your bond. Without this, your relationship might feel like it's stuck in a perpetual state of limbo. Reignite the conversation about your future and explore what you both want moving forward.
Do you often find yourself handling life's challenges alone, despite being married? If so, you might be in a situationship where you're doing the heavy lifting solo. Marriage is meant to be a partnership where both parties support and uplift each other. When you feel like you're single, it's a clear sign that something is amiss.
Feeling like you're on your own can breed resentment and dissatisfaction. A healthy relationship requires both partners to participate and contribute to each other's well-being actively. If you're carrying the emotional load by yourself, it's time to address the imbalance. Seek ways to create a more equitable and supportive partnership.
Does it seem like your interactions are more transactional than emotional? If your marriage resembles a business partnership rather than a loving relationship, it's a sign of a situationship. Emotional connections are paramount, and when they're absent, the relationship can feel hollow. A series of obligations and exchanges may have replaced the love and care that once defined your marriage.
When a marriage feels transactional, it can strip away the joy and spontaneity that make relationships fulfilling. It's easy to fall into routines where you're merely going through the motions, but it's harder to break free from them. Reconnect with your partner on an emotional level, exploring what truly matters to both of you. This shift can transform a utilitarian relationship into one that is rich and rewarding.
If doubt and suspicion have crept into your relationship, it might be indicative of a situationship. Trust is the cornerstone of any successful partnership, and its absence can lead to a groundswell of insecurity. When you can't rely on your partner, the foundation of your marriage begins to crumble. Rebuilding trust requires time, effort, and transparency from both parties.
Erosion of trust can manifest in various ways, from questioning each other's motives to a lack of openness. In a strong relationship, trust fosters a sense of safety and understanding. Without it, misunderstandings and conflicts can spiral out of control. Address any trust issues head-on, working together to restore faith in each other's intentions.
Have your shared hobbies and interests fallen by the wayside? If so, this could be a sign you're slipping into a situationship. Common interests are crucial for maintaining a sense of connection and camaraderie. Without them, the relationship can begin to feel distant and impersonal.
When shared activities disappear, so do the opportunities to enjoy each other's company in a relaxed and joyful setting. This absence can create a void, where you find yourselves living parallel lives rather than intersecting ones. Reignite shared interests by exploring new hobbies or revisiting old ones together. This shared focus can rejuvenate your bond and bring back a sense of playfulness and adventure.
In times of crisis, do you feel supported by your partner, or do you find yourself weathering the storm alone? The absence of emotional support can indicate a situation where the relationship lacks depth and substance. Emotional support is the bedrock of a healthy partnership, providing comfort and reassurance. Without it, you may feel isolated and overwhelmed.
A lack of emotional support can lead to feelings of loneliness and detachment. It's essential to create an environment where both partners feel heard and valued. By actively providing emotional support, you can foster a sense of security and belonging within the marriage. This foundation is key to navigating the inevitable challenges life throws your way.
Do you hesitate to share your thoughts and feelings with your husband, fearing judgment or indifference? This reluctance can be a telltale sign of a situationship within marriage. Open communication is vital for emotional intimacy and mutual understanding. Without it, the relationship can feel superficial and unfulfilling.
When you're afraid to speak up, it can create an atmosphere of tension and frustration. A healthy relationship encourages vulnerability and openness, allowing both partners to feel valued and understood. Break down the barriers by fostering a safe space for dialogue and expression. Rebuilding trust in communication can strengthen your bond and ensure you feel seen and heard.

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Yahoo
03-07-2025
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15 Reasons You Feel Like You're In A 'Situationship' With Your Own Husband
In the realm of modern relationships, there's a peculiar place where romance and ambiguity intertwine, where the lines between love and convenience blur. Welcome to the "situationship"—typically the realm of dating apps and undefined connections. But what if you find yourself in one with your own husband? It's a sobering thought, and yet, more common than you'd expect. Here are fourteen signs that might have you pondering the state of your marital union. When was the last time you had a heart-to-heart conversation with your husband that wasn't about logistics or what's for dinner? If your discussions rarely stray beyond the mundane, you might be in a situationship. The spontaneity and depth that once characterized your conversations have given way to a perfunctory exchange of words. It's as if you're roommates rather than partners in life. According to Dr. Andrea Bonior, a clinical psychologist and author of "The Friendship Fix," the absence of meaningful communication can be a red flag. She explains that when couples cease to share their inner thoughts and feelings, they risk drifting apart emotionally. Without regular, open dialogue, even the strongest bonds can grow tenuous. It's essential to prioritize intentional communication to maintain a genuine connection. Remember those early days when any moment could be an opportunity for romance? If flowers or surprise date nights have become relics of the past, you might be in a situationship. It's not just about grand gestures; even the smallest acts of love have vanished into thin air. When romance becomes an afterthought, your relationship might be treading on thin ice. The absence of romance can signal a disconnect between partners, where complacency replaces genuine affection. It's easy to fall into routines that eschew the excitement of yesteryear, but it's harder to reignite the spark once it's gone. A lack of romance can gradually erode the emotional foundation of your relationship. You both deserve to feel cherished and desired, not just tolerated. If you and your husband operate in distinctly separate social circles, you may find yourself feeling like more of an acquaintance than a partner. This division can gradually lead to a sense of isolation within your marriage. Shared experiences and mutual friends help solidify a partnership, fostering a sense of unity. Without these connections, it's easy to feel like two ships passing in the night. A 2018 study conducted by the University of Kansas found that couples who share social networks tend to experience stronger relational satisfaction. Lead researcher Dr. Jeffrey Hall noted that shared friendships can act as a buffer against relationship stress. When your social lives don't intersect, you're missing out on opportunities to strengthen your bond through shared experiences. It might be time to bridge that gap and find common ground. Do you sidestep the tough talks, hoping they'll resolve themselves? Avoiding conflict may provide temporary peace, but it can also create a situationship within your marriage. When important issues are swept under the rug, resentment and misunderstanding are likely to fester. Healthy relationships require confronting challenges head-on, no matter how uncomfortable. The avoidance of difficult conversations can lead to emotional distance and decrease intimacy. It's a temporary fix that doesn't address the underlying issues threatening your bond. By fostering an environment where open dialogue is encouraged, you're more likely to maintain a strong, supportive partnership. Remember, the best relationships are built on honesty and trust, not avoidance. Do you find yourself going through the motions without any real thought or intention? Living on autopilot can make your marriage feel more like a business arrangement than a loving partnership. When you're only half-present, your emotional connection becomes a casualty. This detachment can gradually erode the intimacy and understanding that once defined your relationship. According to relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, one of the predictors of relationship dissatisfaction is a lack of emotional presence. Being present means tuning into your partner's needs and emotions, not just being physically there. When you're in autopilot mode, you miss the subtle cues that are essential for maintaining a thriving relationship. To combat this, practice intentionality in your interactions, ensuring your actions align with your intentions. When was the last time you shared a moment of real intimacy? The absence of physical closeness might signify you're drifting into a situationship with your husband. It's not just about sex, but about feeling connected and valued through touch and affection. Without it, the emotional connection can wither, leaving resentment in its place. Physical intimacy is more than a mere expression of love; it's a vital component of a healthy relationship. It fosters a sense of belonging and reinforces the emotional bonds between partners. When intimacy evaporates, it can feel like you're living with a stranger. Rebuilding this aspect of your relationship requires effort and vulnerability, but the payoff is a renewed sense of connection. If it feels like you and your husband are always on different pages, this misalignment could indicate a situationship. When your goals and priorities diverge, it can feel as if you're living separate lives. Shared values and aspirations are crucial for maintaining a united front. Without them, the foundation of your relationship can start to crack. A survey by the Pew Research Center highlighted that shared priorities are essential for relationship satisfaction. Researcher Dr. Juliana Horowitz emphasized that couples who align in their goals and values report higher levels of happiness. It's crucial to regularly check in with each other to ensure your priorities are still in sync. This alignment creates a sense of partnership and purpose within the marriage. When was the last time you discussed the future with your spouse? If long-term plans are never on the table, you may be navigating a situationship. Without shared dreams and aspirations, a relationship can become stagnant. Future planning is an investment in your partnership, signaling commitment and shared purpose. The absence of future discussions can indicate a lack of direction and shared vision. Planning together creates anticipation and excitement, reinforcing your bond. Without this, your relationship might feel like it's stuck in a perpetual state of limbo. Reignite the conversation about your future and explore what you both want moving forward. Do you often find yourself handling life's challenges alone, despite being married? If so, you might be in a situationship where you're doing the heavy lifting solo. Marriage is meant to be a partnership where both parties support and uplift each other. When you feel like you're single, it's a clear sign that something is amiss. Feeling like you're on your own can breed resentment and dissatisfaction. A healthy relationship requires both partners to participate and contribute to each other's well-being actively. If you're carrying the emotional load by yourself, it's time to address the imbalance. Seek ways to create a more equitable and supportive partnership. Does it seem like your interactions are more transactional than emotional? If your marriage resembles a business partnership rather than a loving relationship, it's a sign of a situationship. Emotional connections are paramount, and when they're absent, the relationship can feel hollow. A series of obligations and exchanges may have replaced the love and care that once defined your marriage. When a marriage feels transactional, it can strip away the joy and spontaneity that make relationships fulfilling. It's easy to fall into routines where you're merely going through the motions, but it's harder to break free from them. Reconnect with your partner on an emotional level, exploring what truly matters to both of you. This shift can transform a utilitarian relationship into one that is rich and rewarding. If doubt and suspicion have crept into your relationship, it might be indicative of a situationship. Trust is the cornerstone of any successful partnership, and its absence can lead to a groundswell of insecurity. When you can't rely on your partner, the foundation of your marriage begins to crumble. Rebuilding trust requires time, effort, and transparency from both parties. Erosion of trust can manifest in various ways, from questioning each other's motives to a lack of openness. In a strong relationship, trust fosters a sense of safety and understanding. Without it, misunderstandings and conflicts can spiral out of control. Address any trust issues head-on, working together to restore faith in each other's intentions. Have your shared hobbies and interests fallen by the wayside? If so, this could be a sign you're slipping into a situationship. Common interests are crucial for maintaining a sense of connection and camaraderie. Without them, the relationship can begin to feel distant and impersonal. When shared activities disappear, so do the opportunities to enjoy each other's company in a relaxed and joyful setting. This absence can create a void, where you find yourselves living parallel lives rather than intersecting ones. Reignite shared interests by exploring new hobbies or revisiting old ones together. This shared focus can rejuvenate your bond and bring back a sense of playfulness and adventure. In times of crisis, do you feel supported by your partner, or do you find yourself weathering the storm alone? The absence of emotional support can indicate a situation where the relationship lacks depth and substance. Emotional support is the bedrock of a healthy partnership, providing comfort and reassurance. Without it, you may feel isolated and overwhelmed. A lack of emotional support can lead to feelings of loneliness and detachment. It's essential to create an environment where both partners feel heard and valued. By actively providing emotional support, you can foster a sense of security and belonging within the marriage. This foundation is key to navigating the inevitable challenges life throws your way. Do you hesitate to share your thoughts and feelings with your husband, fearing judgment or indifference? This reluctance can be a telltale sign of a situationship within marriage. Open communication is vital for emotional intimacy and mutual understanding. Without it, the relationship can feel superficial and unfulfilling. When you're afraid to speak up, it can create an atmosphere of tension and frustration. A healthy relationship encourages vulnerability and openness, allowing both partners to feel valued and understood. Break down the barriers by fostering a safe space for dialogue and expression. Rebuilding trust in communication can strengthen your bond and ensure you feel seen and heard.
Yahoo
16-06-2025
- Yahoo
Why Your Overly Positive Personality Drives Your Friends Crazy
In today's world, where Instagram filters everyone into perfection and motivational quotes are slapped on everything from mugs to T-shirts, it might be shocking to realize that your relentless optimism isn't always welcome. Your toxic positivity might be the very thing that's driving your friends up the wall. We get it; the intention is good, a well-meaning attempt to uplift and inspire. But sometimes, just sometimes, your sunny-side-up perspective might be doing more harm than good. Here's the rundown of why everyone might not be jumping on your positivity parade. Your relentless positivity might set a standard that your friends feel they can't live up to. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt, as they compare themselves to an unrealistic ideal. Instead of inspiring them, you might inadvertently be creating a divide. It's important to show your friends that it's okay to have off days and that nobody is perfect. By being open about your struggles and vulnerabilities, you can model what it means to embrace the full spectrum of human emotions. This can make you more relatable and approachable, fostering deeper connections with those around you. Remember, authenticity breeds connection. When you share your true self, you permit others to do the same. When a friend is venting about their terrible day, your immediate response is to remind them that it could be worse. You've got your 'stop complaining and be grateful' speech down pat, and while it seems like the right thing to say, it often just feels dismissive. The University of Kansas conducted research showing that validating someone's emotional experience fosters stronger connections. By skipping over their feelings, you're unintentionally ignoring their reality and the chance for genuine connection. Your friends, believe it or not, aren't searching for a pep talk at every turn. Sometimes they just want someone to say, 'Wow, that sucks.' It's not about reveling in negativity; it's about acknowledging that life isn't always a motivational poster. By jumping straight to the bright side, you're missing the opportunity to stand by them in their moment of need. And that, dear optimist, can feel incredibly isolating. In your pursuit of happiness, you might breeze past the gritty, messy details of life that your friends are entrenched in. This avoidance of the uncomfortable aspects of life can make your positivity seem disingenuous. In real friendships, glossing over the less-than-perfect parts can prevent deeper bonds from forming. It's the grit and grime of life that often fosters the most authentic connections. While you might think your relentless cheerfulness is a breath of fresh air, it can come across as shallow. Your friends might feel like you're not someone they can turn to when they're knee-deep in a mess. True support means you're willing to step into the muck with them, not just hover above it with a smile. Remember, real life is a mix of highs and lows, and ignoring the lows doesn't erase them. When you tell someone, 'It could be worse,' you're not making them feel better. Instead, you're telling them that their feelings aren't justified unless they're at the end of the suffering spectrum. This minimizes their experience and makes them feel like they need to compete with others to earn their right to feel bad. In reality, everyone's struggles are relative and should be respected as such. Assuming that your friends should feel grateful for not being in a worse situation can quickly shut down meaningful communication. It prevents them from fully expressing themselves because they're constantly comparing their problems to those of others. This comparison game can lead to feelings of inadequacy and shame that you're inadvertently amplifying. What you're left with is a friend who's more likely to bottle things up, avoiding your dismissive reactions. Telling someone to 'just think positive' sounds easy enough, but it's akin to telling someone to 'just fix it' without offering any tools. It disregards the complexity of emotions and the underlying issues that need addressing. According to psychologist Dr. Barbara Markway, strategies like mindfulness and acknowledging one's feelings are more effective in changing a negative mindset. Simply willing away negativity is not a sustainable strategy. By reducing someone's internal struggle to a simplistic directive, you're not giving them any real guidance. They need actionable steps, not just platitudes, to navigate through their challenges. When you throw 'just think positive' at them, it can feel like you're throwing them into the deep end without a life vest. Helping someone involves more than just a slogan; it's about offering concrete support. When a friend shares their struggles, responding with 'At least you have…' might feel like you're helping them gain perspective, but it often does the opposite. This type of response can feel invalidating, as it shifts the focus from their feelings to a comparison that may not be relevant. According to a study published by the Journal of Clinical Psychology, emotional validation is crucial for effective communication and relational satisfaction. By playing the 'at least' game, you sideline their current experience, leaving them feeling misunderstood and unsupported. It's important to realize that highlighting silver linings doesn't make the clouds disappear. Your friends need space to express their feelings without being told that they should feel differently. By constantly pointing out what they should be thankful for, you might be unintentionally telling them they don't have the right to feel upset. Allowing them the freedom to express their emotions without caveats can be far more supportive. Life isn't just a series of good or bad events; it's a spectrum of experiences that can elicit a wide range of emotions. But your tendency to paint everything in black and white might be doing a disservice to your friends. This binary view of emotions can prevent them from fully exploring and understanding their feelings. When you insist on positive thinking, you might be closing the door on meaningful introspection. Emotions are complex and often layered, with multiple feelings occurring simultaneously. This richness can't be distilled down to just 'happy' or 'sad.' By pushing a simplistic, positive narrative, you're encouraging them to bypass this complexity. Authentic support involves recognizing and validating all emotions, not just the ones wrapped in sunshine. Your insistence on seeing the bright side might add more stress to your friends' lives. A study from the University of California, Berkeley, found that forcing happiness can lead to increased levels of stress and anxiety. When you pressure your friends to be perpetually upbeat, you're ignoring the natural ebb and flow of emotions. This expectation to constantly maintain a positive outlook can be exhausting and feel like an additional burden. Instead of alleviating stress, your relentless optimism might be piling it on. It creates an environment where your friends feel they must suppress their true emotions in favor of the ones they think you'll accept. This suppression can lead to deeper emotional issues that surface later on. Encouraging your friends to be real and honest, even when it's not pretty, can offer genuine relief instead of added pressure. When someone opens up about a problem, resist the urge to jump straight into solution mode. Your brain might be wired to fix things, but not every issue has a straightforward resolution. Some problems require time, patience, and a willingness to sit with discomfort. By insisting on a quick fix, you might be dismissing the complexity of what they're going through. Your friends need your support, not your superhero cape. Solving their problems might make you feel useful, but it can come across as dismissive of their capacity to handle their own lives. Being there to listen and understand that some issues are ongoing can be more supportive than offering a list of solutions. Sometimes, the best way to help is by being present rather than presumptuous. Perpetual sunshine might seem appealing, but it can create shadows where none should exist. In your quest for unwavering positivity, you might cast judgment on those who don't share your sunny disposition. This can result in alienating those who are processing their emotions in their own time and way. Your friends might start to feel like they must wear a mask around you, obscuring their true selves. Not every day calls for a smile, and pretending it does can be exhausting. By expecting everyone to mirror your constant cheerfulness, you could be negating their genuine feelings. This expectation might prevent them from feeling safe enough to express their true emotions. Recognizing the full spectrum of emotions in your friends can foster more genuine connections. Your need to maintain a positive façade for others might suggest an avoidance of dealing with your own emotions. Constantly focusing on others' happiness can be a way to deflect from your struggles. This deflection might seem like generosity, but it can be a sign that you're neglecting your emotional well-being. Your positivity can be a mask, a way to hide what's going on underneath. By relentlessly promoting positivity, you might be denying yourself the opportunity to grow and learn from life's challenges. It's essential to look inward and acknowledge your feelings. Only then can you genuinely support others in their emotional journey. Remember, self-reflection doesn't diminish your positivity; it enhances your authenticity. Your drive to be a beacon of positivity often means that you feel the need to always be 'on.' This can lead to an unsustainable cycle of emotional exhaustion and burnout. While your intentions are noble, it's crucial to remember that nobody can maintain a constant state of high energy and happiness. Perfection is an illusion, and striving for it can be draining. Your friends might feel like they're walking on eggshells, trying to match your enthusiasm. This pressure to conform to your upbeat outlook can be taxing on relationships. Allowing for moments of vulnerability and authenticity can create a more balanced dynamic. Letting go of the need to always be 'on' can make room for more genuine interactions. It's easy to fall into the trap of offering unsolicited advice when someone shares their struggles with you. You might think you're helping by providing solutions, but sometimes, your friends aren't looking for advice—they just need an empathetic ear. Offering advice can unintentionally convey that their feelings or actions aren't valid. Listening without interjecting can be far more powerful than any advice you can offer. When you rush to fix things, you might miss out on understanding the depth of what they're experiencing. Your friends might start to feel like their emotions are problems to be solved rather than experiences to be shared. By holding back on the advice, you allow them to explore their feelings without judgment. This creates a space where they can process and heal on their terms.
Yahoo
02-06-2025
- Yahoo
KU professor joins lawsuit to pressure New Jersey to allow DNA testing of Lindbergh evidence
Jonathan Hagel, an assistant professor of history at the University of Kansas, is among plaintiffs in a New Jersey lawsuit filed to compel opening of a documentary archives tied to the kidnapping and murder of aviator Charles Lindburgh's son. Hagel and other researchers seek permission to expose certain documents to modern DNA testing. (Submitted) TOPEKA — An assistant professor at the University of Kansas is a plaintiff in a New Jersey lawsuit seeking modern DNA testing of state archive materials tied to the kidnapping and murder of the infant son of trans-Atlantic aviator Charles Lindbergh. The 200-page Mercer County Superior Court suit was filed amid controversy about decisions by New Jersey State Police to block access to the case archive. The plaintiffs — KU historian Jonathan Hagel, author Catherine Read and retired teacher Michele Downie — said their Open Public Records Act request related the 1932 kidnapping was rejected. Hagel, a New Jersey native who has studied the Lindbergh case, said DNA analysis of ransom notes or envelopes could contribute to understanding whether Bruno Richard Hauptmann, who was executed in 1936 after convicted of first-degree murder, acted alone in the high-profile crime. It is among questions that have riveted scholars and investigators since Hauptmann's trial. 'There were more than a dozen ransom letters overall, and they were sent through the post,' said Hagel, a New Jersey native who has studied the Lindbergh case. 'If Hauptmann's DNA is on it, then he definitely is not innocent of being involved. But, if there is other DNA, that would confirm other people's involvement.' Twenty-month-old Charles Lindbergh Jr. was abducted from the family estate near Hopewell, New Jersey. The family was contacted through ransom notes and parcels, and a demand for $50,000 was paid. The toddler's remains were subsequently discovered adjacent to a roadside several miles from the Lindbergh home. 'There are those who think we're likely to find Charles Lindbergh's DNA on the materials,' Hagel said. 'They believe there was some kind of accident, and he orchestrated this as a way to deflect responsibility.' At least one previous lawsuit unsuccessfully sought to compel New Jersey to allow DNA testing of documents associated with the case. A state appellate court said New Jersey law didn't guarantee a public right to physically examine archive materials. In 2023, the State Police said access was restricted to preserve contents of case files. 'My take is that states or police organizations, like any bureaucracy, just like to protect their stuff,' Hagel said. 'There are others who think the state police are embarrassed they may have botched it quite badly and been involved in a railroading.'