Gen Alpha Is Different in So Many Ways, Including Their ‘Awkward Phase'—Here's Why

Yahoo

17-06-2025

Fact checked by Sarah Scott
If you've scrolled through recent end-of-school-year photos or passed a group of sephora tweens at the mall, you might notice something different about today's kids. Generation Alpha seems to be more polished, stylish, and mature than many of us were at their age.
This is leading many parents to wonder if Generation Alpha is bypassing the "awkward phase.' TikTokers have been sharing their thoughts on this observation, with one saying Gen Alpha immediately gets to their 'glow-up stage' and another saying they are growing up way too fast.
Is Generation Alpha really skipping the 'awkward phase?' The answer is more complicated than yes or no. While many tweens may look different on the outside, experts say the 'awkward phase' has not disappeared. It is simply taking new forms.
The 'awkward phase' usually refers to the tween years, roughly ages 9 to 12, when kids physically, socially, and emotionally begin shifting into adolescence. It's a time of experimentation, often shown in bold fashion choices, offbeat interests, and social discomfort. In past decades, this stage was easy to spot: clashing colors, poor makeup attempts, and wardrobes inspired by favorite TV stars.
But those outward signs only told part of the story. The 'awkward phase' has never been just about appearance. It's about identity-building, boundary-testing, and emotional growth. That hasn't changed for Generation Alpha.
'I don't think the 'awkward phase' has disappeared—it's just evolved,' explains Jessica Hill, founder of The Parent Collective, a platform supporting expectant and new parents."The awkwardness hasn't gone away; it's just being masked or reframed to fit into a highly-curated digital culture."Today's tweens are growing up in a world shaped less by cable TV and more by short-form videos, Instagram aesthetics, and influencer culture. Instead of idolizing sitcom trendsetters, many emulate lifestyle creators who promote capsule wardrobes, skincare routines, and age-appropriate yet refined looks.
It may seem like today's children dress like young adults, but they are simply responding to their environment, just like every generation before them. Unsurprisingly, social media is playing a massive role. Most platforms require users to be at least 13, but research shows that 38% of kids 8 to 12 years old use social media, according to Common Sense Media.
'What kids see online—the styles, the humor, the ways of presenting yourself—bleeds into real life,' says Hill. 'The awkwardness hasn't gone away; it's just being masked or reframed to fit into a highly-curated digital culture.'
That's true even for tweens who aren't actively posting or scrolling on social media; they are still absorbing norms through peers.
But while signs of awkwardness may look different, the core experiences of middle childhood remain. Kids today are still figuring out who they are, navigating hormones, trying to fit in with peers, and managing friendships and emotions. Their inner worlds are just as complex as before.
The difference is in how they express it. Rather than layering rainbow socks over leggings, a tween might pour creativity into editing videos or organizing Pinterest boards. As Hill puts it, 'Social media has dramatically shifted how kids form and express identity—and it's complicated.'
It's natural for parents to feel uneasy as childhood seems to shift rapidly. The 'mini adult' look can create the impression that kids are maturing too fast or like innocence is fading.
There's also concern that kids are becoming self-conscious earlier, pressured to present a polished image both on and offline. Social media doesn't just amplify comparison—it can rewire how kids relate to themselves and others.
'Modern-day tweens appear to be 'growing up faster,' as they are privy to more information than ever before and spend more time immersed in goal-oriented activities to hone singular areas of expertise at increasingly early ages,' says Debbie Raphael, MD, a double board-certified parent and child psychiatrist.
This type of development and over-reliance on digital activities may come at a cost. 'Fast tracking the journey of middle childhood may lead tweens to forgo opportunities for mastering developmental tasks that, although difficult, are crucial to social functioning and future healthy relationships,' says Dr. Raphael.
Instead of mourning the changes, focus on what tweens need most: space to grow, freedom to be imperfect, and reassurance that it's OK to not have all the answers.
Celebrate a changing awkwardness. Tweens today still face complex emotions and uncertain friendships. Be present, laugh, and let them embrace their awkward moments. Make sure to check in with your tween and get to know their world by asking open-ended questions.
Encourage creative outlets. Offer kids safe spaces for expression, such as art classes, digital storytelling, journaling, or DIY projects. Let them decorate their rooms or explore hobbies to support identity development.
Use screens to bond. Try watching their favorite shows, following them on Instagram, or talking openly about what they're seeing online. 'Prioritizing relational health is paramount,' says Dr. Raphael. 'This means tending to our relationship with our tweens even as they retreat with their devices.'
Understand new ways of connecting. Just because tweens spend more time online doesn't mean their friendships lack depth. 'My boys, for example, have vibrant social lives that often play out online,' Hill shares. 'They'll gather on Discord or game together for hours, laughing and talking as they would in person. That felt foreign to me at first but that doesn't make their experiences any less meaningful.'
Model realness. Hill emphasizes the value of showing kids it's OK to be imperfect. 'The more we normalize realness at home, the less power the curated world of social media holds over them,' says Hill.
Avoid adult assumptions. Dressing maturely doesn't mean a tween wants to grow up faster. Often, they mimic trends without understanding adult meanings. Approach with curiosity, not alarm. Remember, many kids of Generation Alpha may appear more composed, but they are still learning, fumbling, and forming who they are.
Read the original article on Parents