
Trigger warning! My top 20 children's classics that need a rewrite
Humpty Dumpty. Trigger warnings: health and safety, inadequate risk management. Suggested edit:Humpty Dumpty sat on the floor, Humpty Dumpty did not have a fall.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Trigger warnings: gluttony, sloth. Suggested edit: Augustus Gloop wins the Golden Ticket, which is a year's supply of Ozempic.
Charlotte's Web. Trigger warning: death, spiders. Suggested edit: Charlotte, a cute puppy, strikes up a friendship with a kitten and lives happily ever after.
Mr Bounce. Trigger warnings: uncontrolled bouncing. Serious health and safety concerns. Mr Bounce does not wear a helmet. He falls straight through the floor when he gets out of bed, because his anti-bounce boots are so heavy. Suggested edit to include the importance of not jumping out of bed without checking the floor offers adequate structural support.
Winnie-the-Pooh. Trigger warning: sugar addiction. Suggested edit: instead of eating too much 'hunny' and getting stuck in Rabbit's House, Pooh will join a Parkrun round the Hundred Acre Wood.
Where the Wild Things Are. Trigger warnings: monsters roaring their terrible roars so close to bedtime may cause nightmares. Issues with appropriate punishment and verbalising anger. Suggested edit: the monsters talk openly and calmly about the ups and downs of their day. Max encourages them to speak honestly about their mental health and offers tips for channelling roars in a more positive direction.
• 'Trigger toolkit' for museums comes with its own warning
Alice in Wonderland. Glorifies drug use. Normalises hallucination and being off your head. Suggested edit: Alice doesn't drink the bottle marked 'drink me'. The End.
Fairytales: Snow White (food poisoning), Rapunzel (false imprisonment), Dumbo (name-calling, anti-big ear sentiment). Bin them all.
Beatrix Potter: endlessly problematic. Tom Kitten (fat-ism), Jemima Puddleduck (false imprisonment), Two Bad Mice (not bad, just misunderstood), Mrs Tiggy-Winkle (labour relations, fair pay), Samuel Whiskers (vicious anti-rat sentiment throughout). Suggested edit: Samuel Whiskers befriends Tom Kitten and together they plan nutritious meals without suet. Or pudding.
The Water Babies (child exploitation, drowning). Suggested edit: Tom puts on armbands before jumping in the river. Possible new chapter on the benefits of cold water swimming.
The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Trigger warnings: malnutrition, out-of-body experiences. Suggested edit: the caterpillar learns the importance of portion control and eating your five a day. Caterpillar could also live in permanent state of arrested development until 8+ age group.
The Magic Faraway Tree. Trigger warnings: sexism, misogyny, outdated stereotypes of travelling salesmen. Suggested edit: the Saucepan Man becomes the Saucepan Person, Silky to become a male fairy, the Angry Pixie rejects traditional pixie stereotypes and identifies as the Zen Pixie.
The Wind in the Willows (glorifies speeding and dangerous driving, possible climate change denial). Suggested edit: Mr Toad buys a bike.
Watership Down. Trigger warnings: are you kidding me? Have you read it?
Amid all the excitable scientific chatter about life on Mars, or the moon, or wherever we're supposed to be going when we balls up Earth, I'm glad that some scientists are focusing on the most important thing of all, which is tea. There is no point living anywhere without a good brew, so hats off to the British researchers who are seeing if the type of Camellia — who knew? — that gives us tea can survive in space. I can't get out of the house in the morning without a cup of tea, and I don't intend to try on Mars, so fingers crossed they succeed before the gate closes.
• UK scientists grow tea in moon soil, for an out of this world brew
I note also that they're not trying to grow coffee up there, and quite right too. Filthy stuff. Besides, I imagine we'll all need to pack light for outer space and that means appliances that multitask. My kettle beats your Nespresso machine hands down. I've seen the future and it's Twining's.
So the memorial to Queen Elizabeth is to take the form of a translucent bridge in St James's Park, modelled on the magnificent tiara that she wore on her wedding day. It looks better than it sounds and it seems like a lovely idea, but alas, that's not all.
• Queen Elizabeth's horseback memorial will watch over the Mall
The memorial committee has also commissioned a statue of Queen Elizabeth with Prince Philip, a new gate, a wind sculpture, whatever a wind sculpture might be, and another sculpture nearby of the late Queen mounted on a horse. Why are there so many? Why are they all in London, not scattered around the country? And why, even more bizarrely, are they all in the same park in London?
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The Sun
21 minutes ago
- The Sun
Angela Scanlon tells our exclusive new podcast she peed herself on Strictly Come Dancing during ‘spicy' performance
FOR many celebs and famous faces, appearing on Strictly Come Dancing is top of their wish list. After years of turning the BBC show down, Angela Scanlon, 41, finally accepted the offer in 2023. 5 5 Before that, the Irish TV presenter was ''too afraid to be seen as not clever or funny or smart enough'', she told Fabulous in 2024. However, the mum-of-two gave it some thought and realised there were ''loads of things'' she could gain from the experience. For the 41-year-old, it was also about taking part in something purely for herself, after having her second child, Marnie, now three, in 2022. She also has Ruby, seven, with husband Roy Horgan, 43, who works in tech. But in hindsight, it, perhaps, wasn't the best of ideas, as her pelvic floor was ''not ready''. Now, a few years later, Angela has openly spoken about her experience of appearing on the cult favourite show as a mother who had an 18-month-old baby at the time. The mother-of-two shared what really took place behind our TV screens on our new parenting vodcast No Parental Guidance, hosted by parenting influencer Louise Boyce and comedian Hannah East. ''It was a lot. I didn't really anticipate it in my head,'' she told the hosts on the episode. ''The old pelvic floor was under pressure.'' Angela - who also spoke about smartphone bans - went on: ''People don't talk a lot about pelvic floor health. ''In France, I remember in my NCT group the first time around, there was a French woman and she was like, 'I'm going to the physio '. ''I was like, 'For what?' What happened?' ''She said, 'For my - up there'. ''It's obligatory post-birth in France that you have six weeks physiotherapy, internal physiotherapy.'' Strictly 2025 rumoured line-up Angellica Bell: A familiar face on British television, Angellica is a seasoned TV presenter known for her work on shows like CBBC and The One Show. She's no stranger to reality TV, having recently appeared on Celebrity Big Brother. Paul C. Brunson: The charismatic relationship expert and matchmaker from Married At First Sight UK, Paul is known for his insightful advice and warm personality. Swapping the sofa for the samba, he's tipped to bring a touch of class and intelligence to the competition. Dani Dyer: Rising to fame as the winner of Love Island in 2018, Dani has remained in the public eye with various TV appearances. The daughter of actor Danny Dyer, she's reportedly agreed to take part. Vicky Pattison: A reality TV stalwart who first found fame on Geordie Shore, Vicky has successfully transitioned into a presenter and author. Having supported her friend Pete Wicks on the show last year, it seems she's ready to put on her own dancing shoes. Ashley Cain: Former footballer and reality TV star from Ex on the Beach, Ashley has more recently become known for his incredible charity work and campaigning. Stacey Solomon: Known for her down-to-earth charm and successful BBC shows like Sort Your Life Out, fans are eager to see if she can translate her infectious energy to the ballroom. Georgia Toffolo: Best known as "Toff" from Made in Chelsea and for winning I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! in 2017, Georgia is a seasoned reality TV star. Thomas Skinner: The lively entrepreneur who became a fan favourite on The Apprentice in 2019, Thomas is known for his larger-than-life personality and catchphrase "Bosh!". Despite admitting to no dancing experience, he's reportedly "up for giving it his best shot." Tom Parker Bowles: The renowned food writer and critic, and son of Queen Camilla, is a surprising but intriguing name on the rumour list. A regular on MasterChef, it remains to be seen if his culinary precision translates to ballroom finesse. Sir Mo Farah: The legendary Olympic long-distance runner is considered a national treasure. Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink: The former Premier League football striker, famous for his time at Leeds and Chelsea, is another sporting name being linked. Harry Aikines-Aryeetey: Known as "Nitro" from the BBC's Gladiat o rs reboot and a former Team GB sprinter, Harry has already shown off some moves on the Strictly Come Dancing Christmas Special. Balvinder Sopal: The talented actress known for her role as Suki Panesar in EastEnders, Balvinder would follow a long line of successful soap stars on Strictly. Jake Brown: The winner of The Traitors series three, Jake's name has emerged as a potential contestant. Stefan Dennis: The actor, 66, has played six-times married Ramsay Street lothario Paul Robinson since the first episode in 1985 and now the soap is coming to an end, his schedule is clear. While no accidents were shown on live TV, Angela confessed that she did pee herself during her Strictly stunt. ''I think I would've peed myself anyway, to be honest. But yeah, I did. I remember doing rehearsals for the Charleston and it was quite a spicy number. ''There was a lot of hopping as there is but ours was particularly bouncy,'' said Angela who partnered with Carlos Gu and finished sixth. ''I did the rehearsal and I remember Carlos being like, 'What happened there?' ''And I was too embarrassed - cause we were three weeks in at that point and I didn't know him well enough to be like, 'I just wet myself'. ''I was also so afraid because I was like, 'Oh my God, what if this happens on the show?' ''Because it's a lot to, like, manage that while also managing your steps and also managing all that stuff. ''But I will say, you know, it's pretty solid now,'' she chuckled. 5 Not allowing her children smartphones During the episode, Angela also revealed why there's a smartphone ban at her home. 'Ruby stamping her feet and telling me that her best mate has one does not mean I'm going to get her a phone if I believe that she is better off as a human without one,' Angela said. 'I'm OK with being the bad bi**h. "I'm actually fine with her hating me if it makes sense in the long run for her not to have one. I'm still the parent.' Angela addded that she knows her own phone use impacts her. 'It's affected my concentration. "I will be reading a book and think: 'Oh, I've read three pages and have no idea what it said.' "There's a lack of regulation online and we are going to hand that to a child? "My plan is to hold off for as long as possible.' 'I think our generation is justifying it because we love it. "I don't want to let it go. It's the conditioning. "You're going: 'Oh my god, how am I going to tell her she's not allowed it when I'm sitting there refreshing. "It requires us all to make changes.'


The Sun
21 minutes ago
- The Sun
Dumped Love Island star confirms he's dating villa girl he wasn't coupled up with as they ‘soft launch' romance
AFTER being brutally dumped earlier this series, Love Island star Remell Mullings has confirmed he's dating a villa girl - and it's not who fans think it is. The hunk, who sparked fix claims, has soft launched his romance with co-star Poppy Harrison after they enjoyed a brief romance on the show. 3 3 Remell, 24, took to Instagram to share a video of the pair looking very cosy while lip syncing to Fat Joe and Ashanti's popular song What's Luv?. The two, who flirted up a storm on the show, can be seen with their arms around one another, with the words written, 'What could've been,' sprawled on the top of the clip. He captioned it: 'A moment that never aired but it happened.' Fans flocked to the comments section to share their thoughts as one blasted: 'Ahhh at least she's happy with being second best.' Another fan commented: 'I don't understand why you never picked her, that's the only time we saw your personality and game when you were with her.' Somebody else gushed: 'Ya'll look good together man. Happy for you,' while a fourth said: 'What's with all of these comments, I love this.' Remell entered the show on day three with Shea Mannings and coupled up with Scottish lash Alima Gagigo. The pair appeared to be into one another before being hit with a curveball, with the arrival of four new bombshells. Remell, along with Dejon Noel-Williams, Helena Ford and Emily Moran, where whisked away to another villa for a sleepover with the four bombshells that had selected them. Poppy, 22, chose Remell and the pair were quite clearly into one another, with plenty of smooches over the course of the 24 hours. Love Island shock as Remell and Megan are sent packing in savage dumping The following day, Maya Jama strutted her way in and issued the four stars an ultimatum – either stay coupled up with their original partners in the villa or recouple with one of the newbies. He chose to stick with Alima which resulted in Poppy being dumped from the island. However, after finding out about his sleepover antics, Alima confronted Remell before ending things with him for good. She fumed: 'This is why I was struggling to open up to you, right. Then the moment I start to this is what you f*****g go and do. It was all fake. All the recoupling speeches." Love Island 2025 full lineup Harry Cooksley: A 30-year-old footballer with charm to spare. Shakira Khan: A 22-year-old Manchester-based model, ready to turn heads. Megan Moore: A payroll specialist from Southampton, looking for someone tall and stylish. Alima Gagigo: International business graduate with brains and ambition. Tommy Bradley: A gym enthusiast with a big heart. Helena Ford: A Londoner with celebrity connections, aiming to find someone funny or Northern. Ben Holbrough: A model ready to make waves. Dejon Noel-Williams: A personal trainer and semi-pro footballer, following in his footballer father's footsteps. Aaron Buckett: A towering 6'5' personal trainer. Conor Phillips: A 25-year-old Irish rugby pro. Antonia Laites: Love Island's first bombshell revealed as sexy Las Vegas pool party waitress. Yasmin Pettet: The 24-year-old bombshell hails from London and works as a commercial banking executive. Emily Moran: Bombshell Welsh brunette from the same town as Love Island 2024 alumni Nicole Samuel. Harrison Solomon: Pro footballer and model entering Love Island 2025 as a bombshell. Giorgio Russo: The 30-year-old will be spending his summer in the sun, potentially his sister Alessia's successful tournament at the Euros in Switzerland. Yaz Broom: Professional DJ from Manchester who appeared on X Factor 2016 in girl group Four of Diamonds. Andrada Pop: Miss Bikini Ireland 2019 winner who hails from Dublin and works as a nail technician and personal trainer. Emma Munro: Harry Cooksley's ex who entered as a bombshell and works as a hydrogeologist. Departures: Kyle Ashman: Axed after an arrest over a machete attack emerged. He was released with no further action taken and denies any wrongdoing. Sophie Lee: A model and motivational speaker who has overcome adversity after suffering life-changing burns in an accident. Blu Chegini: A boxer with striking model looks, seeking love in the villa. Malisha Jordan: A teaching assistant from Broxbourne, Hertfordshire, who entered Love Island 2025 as a bombshell. Shea Mannings: Works as a scaffolder day-to-day and plays semi-pro football on the side. Caprice Alexandra: The 26-year-old bombshell owns a nursery in Romford. Poppy Harrison: The bombshell broke up with her boyfriend after finding out she would be in the villa Will Means: The fourth fittest farmer in the UK according to Farmers' Weekly in 2023 entered the villa as a bombshell Megan Clarke: An Irish actress part of the OG line-up. Remell Mullins: Boasts over 18million likes and 500k followers on TikTok thanks to his sizzling body transformation videos. Alima Gagigo: 23-year-old personal banker from Glasgow who fancies herself as a 'good flirt'. Ryan Bannister: 27-year-old gym hunk who entered the show as a bombshell. Remell was dumped from the show on day 16 after finding himself in the bottom three boys and left with his tail between his legs. Remell and Poppy were reunited on Love Island: Aftersun which led to plenty of awkward moments, much to the delight of audiences. She expressed: 'Do you know what? I felt really betrayed when you didn't pick me because obviously I had all these hopes especially with the truth or dare game. I was like 'Oh, he actually really likes me'. So I was a bit gutted.' He shot back: 'But I did tell you at the end it was shuffling. I didn't tell you that that was my decision.' The pair made it clear that they wouldn't be rekindling their romance on the outside but it appears they've had a change of heart. 3


Daily Mail
21 minutes ago
- Daily Mail
Shocking moment Brit influencer HStikkytokky batters reveller as massive brawl erupts in Magaluf
TikTok influencer HSTikkyTokky was invovled in a violent brawl after clashing with revellers on the streets of Magaluf during a livestream. The social media star, whose real name is Harrison Sullivan, was on a night out in the Spanish resort this week when the dramatic altercation unfolded. Footage shows how 23-year-old Sullivan suddenly becomes surrounded by multiple men, who are shown aggressively shouting at eachother. In an attempt to de-escalte the situation, Sullivan tells the group of men to 'calm down'. But things take an aggressive turn when Sullivan is suddenly pushed, prompting the TikTok star to retaliate. Sullivan is shown forcefully punching the man who had pushed him and knocking another to the ground as a crowd gathers around them. As the fight continues to escalate, bystanders begin cheering and screaming, while Sullivan unleashes a flurry of punches against the group of men. The brawl was eventually broken up and the two groups were separated from eachother. Sullivan, who was livestreaming when the scuffle unfolded, has since been banned from the streaming platform Kick and his video has been deleted. Taking to X to comment on the incident, Sullivan said yesterday: 'Great night in Magaluf today banned off kick AGAIN for selfe defence. Joke.' MailOnline has approached Sullivan for comment. The streamer and TikTok star, who is originally from Essex, has over a million views on some of his videos. Sullivan made headlines last year after he missed a court appearance for a boxing match in Qatar. The influencer was meant to appear at Guildford Magistrates Court on November 28 charged with a string of driving offences, including failing to stop when he crashed his £200,000 McLaren in Virginia Water, Surrey. Dramatic pictures show the purple McClaren 720S, that can go from 0-60 mph in 2.8 seconds, completely destroyed with black smoke rising from its bonnet. Police issued an arrest warrant at the time for the fugitive and confirmed he was on the run, saying they believed he had left the country after he was scheduled to take part in a Misfits boxing match in Qatar. A day later, Sullivan posted a video on TikTok in which he claimed he had flown back to Britain. He later took to X where she shared a mugshot of himself and said he would 'turn myself in tomorrow morning hold tight yeh'. It is unclear whether Sullivan was eventually arrested. MailOnline has approached Surrey Police for comment. This is also not the first time that the TikToker has been involved in a violent bust-up. In september, Sullivan was involved in a disgusting clash with punters after making his Misfits Boxing debut against a former reality television star. He beat Love Island's George Fensom in Dublin, but was then invovled in violent scenes with audience members outside the ring. Sullivan dominated the celebrity boxing exchange, knocking down Fensom three times and prompting the referee to end the fight, with him then confronting several members of the crowd. A wild brawl erupted when the TikTok creator appeared to spit into a mob of spectators, throw a punch at someone in his immediate proximity and attempted to inflict damage with a chair. The celebrity boxer also grabbed a chair and went to throw the object at others as tempers flared before a security guard stepped in at the last-minute to intervene. Sullivan then lost his head as he fought to escape the grips of those restraining him and unsuccessfully tried to get deeper into the audience where others were attempting to come back at him. A host of security personnel also surrounded the viral social media star as violent tempers were eventually quashed and the confrontation that had threatened to spill over finally calmed down.