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How to Potty-Train a Co-Worker
Bathroom Battles Can you help me with this problem? I work in an elementary school as an occupational therapist. I work very closely with teachers in the school on Individualized Education Program legal documents, which need to be worked on collaboratively — I can only do my part if everyone else does their part. I have a co-worker that I work especially closely with, not by my choosing. Professionally he is obnoxious, always waiting until the last minute to complete parts of the document that are required for me to do my part, and terrible at staying on track during meetings… These are things I can handle. I can speak with him about these things. Where I struggle is that his bathroom habits are disgusting. In the school there are only four adult bathrooms. Teachers are all strapped for time, including finding time to use the bathroom, so I get that things might be a little rushed in the bathroom. The problem is that I have entered the bathroom immediately after him multiple times to find a toilet seat covered in urine and a toilet full of frothy pee. We've made eye contact and greeted each other as he exits and I enter. As someone who sits on a toilet to use it, this is unacceptable. This is unprofessional, since this is a shared space, but it doesn't necessarily rise to the level of bringing it up to my supervisor. I have to keep working with this guy, and using the bathroom after him. What should I do? — Anonymous Disgusting. (Your use of the word 'frothy' really sent me over the edge.) I agree that this is unacceptable. And universal: Though the subject makes for a provocative advice column question, I'll bet most of those reading this have had to deal with a co-worker — known or unknown — with disgusting bathroom habits. And it can feel purposeful sometimes. It feels that way to me, at least. Which brings me to this: I wonder if part of the issue here is that your colleague is passive-aggressively doing this deliberately. Does he seem displeased with his work? Is he hostile in other ways? You don't seem to feel any hesitation about discussing your challenges with him professionally; I wonder whether it might be worth having a bigger, 30,000-foot discussion with him about whether he's even happy in his job. I agree that your colleague's behavior doesn't necessarily rise to the level of making an intervention from a supervisor necessary, but I also don't think you should be expected to grin and bear it. Here's my advice: Design and print four signs and tape each sign on the outside of the door of each of the four bathrooms, or on the wall next to the toilet, where everyone can see them. The signs should state plainly, and succinctly, that people who use the bathroom are expected to clean up after themselves, which means flushing the toilet and wiping away bodily fluids so that surfaces are clean for other people. Want all of The Times? Subscribe.
