Chinese wedding custom of Three Letters and Six Rites explained, and what has replaced it

South China Morning Post

14-06-2025

My niece got married last week and I was in London to attend the wedding. It seems only yesterday that I was propping her up and burping her after she had finished her bottle. Suddenly, she was getting married.
Her husband, my nephew-in-law, is a young British man of Indian descent, and a series of traditional Indian rituals took place at the house of the groom's parents the day before the wedding.
The day began with a ritual presided over by a Hindu priest, followed by the Haldi and Mehndi ceremonies, which involve turmeric and henna pastes. There were also lots of delicious treats.
I spent a delightful day in that house in the London suburbs, a day saturated with beautiful sights, sounds and smells. For that special occasion, I wore a kurta, a traditional South Asian tunic, and was assured by the groom's family and relatives that I looked handsome in it. They were much too kind.
Indian weddings often involve a series of traditional rituals.
For Chinese weddings, the traditional 'Three Letters and Six Rites' is a series of ceremonies that were designed to ensure social recognition, family consent and spiritual blessing of the union.
The Three Letters refer to important written documents used during the wedding process: the Betrothal Letter, given by the groom's family during the engagement stage to formally propose the union; the Gift Letter, which details the items and quantities presented during the formal gift-exchange ceremony; and the Wedding Letter, presented when the groom comes to collect the bride, symbolising the official transfer of the bride to the groom's household.