Gender Agenda Newsletter Just tired

The Hindu

6 days ago

Just tired
When we first decided to co-author the newsletter, Sunalini, Radhika, and I, feminists from different age groups, geographies, and socio-economic locations, decided that gender-based violence could not be the focus of Gender Agenda. That way, we would be subscribing to the general notion of what is perceived as 'gender-related news', often tilted towards reportage on heinous crimes against women and gender minorities. Taking that route would defeat several facets of our personhood — the politics surrounding our bodies, access, and autonomy.
Yet, this week, the deaths of two young women in the country, prove repeatedly that gender-based violence — familial and institutional — is a reality for us.
Earlier this week, tennis player Radhika Yadhav, was shot dead by her father Deepak Yadav, in Gurugram. He fired five bullets at the 25-year-old who was cooking in the kitchen. The police claim that Deepak was jeered at by fellow villagers for allegedly living off his daughter. They taunted him for having raised a daughter who wore make-up and created content on Instagram. Here, her father's honour was linked to Radhika's behaviour.
Four days later, in Odisha, a 20-year-old B.Ed. student set herself ablaze on the premises of the Fakir Mohan College against the college's alleged inaction on her formal complaint of sexual harassment by the Head of the Department of Teacher Education, Samira Kumar Sahu. Going by what the principal said, the student faced rustication after bringing up the harassment complaint. 'Whether she meant to take her life or not is difficult to say, but it will be entered into the records as death by suicide,' wrote reporter Satyasundar Barik. Here, the student's voice felt unheard.
Another report put together by the data team of The Hindu that accessed numbers from the National Crime Records Bureau, said that a string of dowry-related deaths had been reported from across the country in 2022. Of the 7,000 dowry deaths reported every year on average, only around 4,500 were charge-sheeted by the police. This is, of course, only reported crimes.
Rithanya, 27, from Thiruppur, died of suicide due to harassment by her husband and in-laws last month. A chilling video that circulated online showcased Rithanya's father who praised his daughter for being committed to her husband even in her death. Rithanya did not just endure torture from her in-laws, but also saw her parents washing their hands of her.
When families and institutions that are meant to form a circle of protection around us fail, where do we go? Do we rant, write open letters, beg for mercy, endure every inappropriate touch, and become torchbearers of patriarchy ourselves? I am tired of ex-gratia amounts, condolence tweets, opposition party protests, and candlelight marches.
Wordsworth
Gendered travel
People across genders perceive travel differently, often influenced by social and cultural factors. This leads to varied patterns in trip frequency, distance, mode, and even the perceived safety of travel environments. Recently, Ladies Compartment, a group exhibition by Method (India), now on view at Galerie Melike Bilir in Hamburg, Germany, displayed the artworks of six women, some of whom showed the quiet solidarities of the ladies' compartment in Mumbai's local trains.
Toolkit
A report released by market research firm Kantar states that Indian advertisements continue to perpetuate traditional beliefs about masculinity. Several outdated norms persist more strongly in the media than they do in men's own beliefs, the report reads. Men said that 35% of ads perpetuated the belief that real men don't cry, 27% of them perpetuated the fear that men do not voice their fears, and 24% felt that sharing problems with women reduces status.
Ouch!
A child is not equal to the woman; a woman is not equal to the man. A man is not equal to the elderly person in the family. We all have different roles, and we are all different.'
Kangana Ranaut, Hindi cinema actor and MP
Women we meet
Fifty-one-year-old Safira Altaf can move a barbell that has a load of 65 kilograms with relative ease. She began weight training three years ago and says that the experience has been incredibly freeing for her as she is confident about taking care of herself when she is old. 'Once, many years ago, a doctor told me women should not lift heavy weights. I blindly followed him. How foolish I was. After years of ignoring my body, I have now begun lifting weights again. I am incredibly strong,' she says. Safira suggests women ignore their partners and children for five hours a week to focus on themselves. 'It is imperative to lift. It helps prevent lifestyle diseases. Mental health too,' she says.