
PETER HOSKIN reviews Rematch: Part cartoon, part fashion shoot, it's blissfully free of sponsorship deals, extra credit card payments... and best of all, there's no Cristiano Ronaldo
Verdict: Golazzo!
Video games have conspired to make the beautiful game ugly.
They've reduced football to sponsorship deals, big spreadsheets and, worst of all, hundreds of additional credit card payments so that you might get a limited-edition version of Cristiano Ronaldo in a fluorescent green kit designed by a YouTube streamer.
But now comes Rematch, a game by Sloclap, the creators of the martial arts classic Sifu, which goes some way to making football beautiful again.
Some of this is down to its look.
Much like Sifu, Rematch has a pleasing animated style — part cartoon, part fashion shoot — that eschews the photorealism of other football games and is much better for it.
But mostly it's down to the gameplay.
Rather than controlling an entire team, here you're given control of a single player in brief, frenetic matches where other people are controlling both your teammates and the opposition.
It's you taking the ball, weaving around tackles and aiming into the top corner... goal! Or rather, as in my case, it's you spooning yet another shot skywards.
The potential for madness, as various players do their own things, is limited by the team-sizes — from three-a-side to five-a-side. Picture a human version of Rocket League, the fantastic game of car-based football, and you're not far off.
Unlike Rocket League, however, Rematch's control system doesn't quite come naturally.
After a perfunctory introduction to its various button presses for different types of shot, pass, tackle and feint, it took me a few more hours to be even acquainted with the game's demands. Hence the spooning.
Still, when you do cross that skill threshold — and intentionally volley the ball past a flailing keeper — it's one of the most satisfying feelings in recent sports gaming. And, what's more, there's no Ronaldo in sight.
Pipistrello And The Cursed Yoyo (PlayStation, Xbox, Switch, PC, £16.75)
Verdict: Delightfully batty
Rating:
Bats are small and fast-moving. They're easy to miss. But please don't make the mistake of missing this particular bat, as I almost did back in May.
That's when Pipistrello and the Cursed Yoyo was released, just ahead of the new Nintendo Switch 2 and the brilliant Death Stranding 2 — but, even with such riches, I doubt I'll play many more enjoyable games this year.
Much like the Legend Of Zelda games from which it borrows, the main character of Pipistrello And The Cursed Yoyo isn't technically given top billing in the title.
You play as Pippit, an endearingly oblivious teenage bat who's obsessed with his yoyo.
When a bunch of mutant animals attack the energy company owned by his less-than-benevolent family, it's up to Pippit to save the day — or have his allowance rescinded.
To be clear, though, this isn't a riff on modern Zelda games, with their vast open worlds and vaster ambitions.
No, Pipistrello harkens back to the top-down Zelda games of the later Game Boy era. Its graphics are bright and pixelated. Its gameplay involves powering-up that yoyo to progress further in its dungeons.
Except these dungeons aren't dungeons in the medieval-fantasy sense. They're locations such as shopping malls and football stadia.
Pipistrello's modern urban world isn't just unusual for the genre, it's a joy to explore — full of weirdos, puzzles, secrets and genuinely funny gags.
There are some moments when the game's difficulty spikes a little too vertiginously. But, otherwise, this is a wonderful throwback that also throws things forward. Pipistrello 2? A bat can dream.

Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles


The Independent
36 minutes ago
- The Independent
Anticipation builds for Oasis' first gig in 16 years
Oasis is commencing their highly anticipated worldwide reunion tour at the Principality Stadium in Cardiff. This concert marks the first time brothers Liam and Noel Gallagher have performed together since 2009, ending a 16-year hiatus. Tens of thousands of fans have gathered in the Welsh capital, many embracing the band's distinctive parka and bucket hat aesthetic. The tour has already generated significant revenue from ticket sales, with further income expected from merchandise. Following the Cardiff dates, Oasis will continue their tour across the UK, North America, South America, Asia, and Australia.


Telegraph
36 minutes ago
- Telegraph
The new Corbyn-Sultana party may be the most sinister Britain has seen in decades
Not since Pulp and the Pyramid Stage were united in perfect harmony in 1995 has the Glasto crowd been this excited about a new partnership. They once chanted: 'Oh, Jeremy Corbyn' to the beat of the White Stripes' Seven Nation Army. They have since declared 'death, death' to an actual army, the Israel Defense Forces (IDF). Now, as if by some Eavis-inspired magic, these two worlds have collided to produce Jeremy Corbyn: The Sequel, guest-starring Zarah Sultana. Although the Marxist mash-up is yet to be officially confirmed, we understand the former Labour MPs are unified by a desire to harness Left-wing and Muslim anger to defeat centrists such as Wes Streeting at the next election. Heady stuff. In a social media post, Sultana said the Government is 'an active participant in genocide' in Gaza and highlighted growing poverty, Labour's position on welfare, and the cost of living as reasons for establishing her new party. 'Labour has completely failed to improve people's lives. And across the political establishment, from Farage to Starmer, they smear people of conscience trying to stop a genocide in Gaza as terrorists. But the truth is clear: this Government is an active participant in genocide. And the British people oppose it.' In fact, a majority of Britons (55 per cent) do not view Israel's actions as genocidal, according to the latest YouGov poll, but pro-Palestinian fanatics have never been very good with facts. Corbyn, never a man in much of a hurry, has not yet broken his silence to say whether or not he supports the new party Sultana claims to have set up with him. As soon as he does, we can surely expect a slow pilgrimage of so-called 'progressives' to Islington North, where all new members will be given rainbow 'Queers for Palestine' badges and keffiyeh scarves. Disappointingly, old Compo's lefty pals John McDonnell and Diane Abbott have refused to sign up. Clive Lewis, the Labour MP for Norwich, who once had to apologise for using the phrase: 'Get on your knees, bitch' has also sadly ruled himself out as a future minister for women and equalities. Shame. Sultana famously once said she would 'celebrate' the deaths of Tony Blair and Benjamin Netanyahu – yet claims to espouse a 'socialism without barbarism'. I'm not so sure. I'm not certain someone like Sultana – the MP for Coventry South who lost the Labour whip soon after being re-elected in 2024 – should be considered an expert on barbarism. She once wrote of her support for 'violent resistance' by Palestinians. Sultana has been accused of using racist slurs while a student at Birmingham University, when she described a Jewish student as a 'YT' (whitey) in a Facebook post. In 2015, the 31-year-old, who sat on the national executives of both Young Labour and the National Union of Students, posted on Twitter: 'Yay, the white woman didn't win the Ethnic Minorities Officer Election!' Yay, indeed! She has previously criticised the police and the monarchy. In 2014, she posted: 'Can we get rid of the monarchy while we're fighting the establishment and its institutions? Viva la revolucion!' In 2015, she tweeted: 'Solidarity with those protesting in London right now. Keep safe from the thugs that are the police.' Although she later apologised for her comments about the police, she denies any suggestion she is an anti-Semite, insisting: 'As an anti-racist campaigner and a Muslim, I'm committed to fighting racism in all its forms and I know that these forms are interconnected and must be fought collectively.' Which brings us nicely on to Corbyn, who similarly claims to be a lifelong 'anti-racism campaigner', despite presiding over the Labour Party when a number of Jewish MPs and members were forced out. In 2016, the 76-year-old said he regretted once describing Hamas and Hezbollah as 'friends'. The admission came two years after he attended a wreath-laying in Tunisia for Palestinian leaders linked to the Black September group which carried out a terror attack on the 1972 Munich Olympics, killing 11 people Israelis. Corbyn insisted he was primarily there to pay his respects to the victims of a 1985 Israeli airstrike on Palestinian Liberation Organisation offices in Tunis. Despite being pictured holding a wreath, he said: 'I was present at that wreath-laying, I don't think I was actually involved in it.' Right, Jezza. The important thing to note here is that this isn't Change UK, dreadful though Anna Soubry is. This has the potential to be a political force more frightening than anything Britain has ever known. Despite Sultana's insistence that she is standing up for an 'island that's suffering' – she is not actually interested in the needs of British citizens; her primary aim is to 'free Palestine'. The clue is in the line that she wants 'money spent on public services, not forever wars'. Similarly, her suggestion that 'we need homes and lives we can actually afford, not rip-off bills we pay every month to a tiny elite bathing in cash,' suggests that she is , in fact, more than content with waging a 'forever war' when it comes to class. Or against those she disagrees with, who in her mind are either Tory scum, Zionist scum, racist scum or, of course, genocidal maniacs. Contrary to preaching 'gentler, kinder' politics, Corbyn and Sultana are the high priest and princess of the kind of nasty, vindictive, and divisive hard-Left ideology that saw the Jewish former Labour MP Luciana Berger require police protection to attend the Labour Party conference in 2018. Given half the chance, they would impoverish us in their communist quest for a more 'equal' society and would revel in our immiseration, believing that we must pay for the sins of empire. Sultana describes Farage as a 'grifter'. Yet in her and Corbyn we have the ultimate pair of political fraudsters, purporting to represent the many when, in fact, they are simply a mouthpiece for a vocal minority of deranged zealots.


The Sun
37 minutes ago
- The Sun
‘That is BRUTAL' people cry as a tattoo artist shows off a man's hair tattoo that's giving ‘Lego businessman' vibes
HAIR loss is a sensitive subject to many and can be very distressing, having a negative impact on your confidence. While some learn to embrace their thinning mane and bald head, it seems that one man has taken a rather drastic approach - getting his 'hair' back in the form of ink. 3 3 The artist behind the masterpiece was tattoo whizz Chris Chow - but unfortunately, the man's new 'mane' hasn't become a major hit online. Chuffed with his work, Chris, from Dover, Kent, posted the jaw-dropping results on TikTok - and it's since gone viral for all the wrong reasons. In the video, which has been viewed more than an astronomical 2.3million times in just one day, Chris showed off the freshly inked head from all angles. The black 'tresses' were significantly darker and longer than the client's real hair, some of which had a grey and white tint. The rather bold tattoo also covered only the top of the man's head - whilst the bottom section still had plenty of his real hair. The brand new 'hairdo' also included a short fringe messily swept to the side and a slightly wavy effect. Chris, who posts under the username @ chrischow113, wrote in the caption: ''This is my work!'' 'That is BRUTAL' But while the pair may have been delighted with the makeover, horrified social media users weren't so convinced by the bold inking. More than 123,000 people gave it a like, as a further 5,118 flooded to comments where many shared their thoughts and tagged their pals. One TikToker was lost for words, writing: ''can't believe what I'm seeing.'' I was on Just Tattoo Of Us in 2019 & got the worst leg tattoos for having streaky fake tan , all I can do now is laugh Another chimed in: ''JESUS is BRUTAL.'' Meanwhile, someone else took a wild guess as to what the client had asked for to end up with the bizarre 'hairdo'. "Lego business man please,'' they joked. Tattoo Do's and Don'ts 1. Think, think and think some more Tattoos done on a whim are far more likely to lead to regret than a tattoo you thought long and hard about. Think about why you want what you've chosen. And if you still want it after a few months, then get it. 2. Age restrictions apply You must be 18 years old to be tattooed in the UK. 3. Don't haggle over the price When you go to a tattoo shop the price is the price. You are paying for an artist's time and skills, they charge what they believe those things are worth. 4. Don't get tattooed while you're hungry Eat before you go for your tattoo session and make sure you're hydrated. You're about to be subjected to a period of sustained physical discomfort, if you're feeling a little weak from hunger or you're dehydrated things will not go as smoothly as they should. 5. Don't drink alcohol before you get tattooed If you are drunk or under the influence of drugs, don't go for a tattoo. In fact, if your tattooist has anything at all about them they will turn you away if you are clearly under the influence of any intoxicating substances. I'd also avoid drinking the night before, even a few drinks will thin your blood and make your bleed more. ''I love the way you blended it with his real hair. He looks really happy,'' a viewer chuckled. ''That should be an offence,'' someone else thought. The Sun previously wrote about a man whose tribute tattoo of his daughter turned out looking like something out of a horror movie. her and her partner's matching tattoo was a bad idea. the rather unfortunate inking.