Brian O'Driscoll interview: I took two years to get over Warren Gatland dropping me from Lions

Telegraph

3 days ago

'I avoided going on the piss on the Sunday with all the other lads,' recalls Brian O'Driscoll. 'I knew if I went on the piss, I wouldn't be right until Thursday. So, I went and had an ice cream instead. I trained Monday, trained Tuesday and when the squad was picked on Wednesday, I thought I might be captain, because Paul O'Connell and Sam Warburton were injured. I was making a cup of coffee when I got a tap on the shoulder, and I knew immediately it was not the kind of tap on the shoulder that a captain gets…'
O'Driscoll is back in Sydney for the first time since that fateful moment, 12 years ago, when his world fell apart ahead of the British and Irish Lions' decisive third Test against Australia, the first time in his glittering career that he had been dropped, sparking furore among supporters and pundits back in Ireland.
We are sitting in the 32nd floor of a high-rise building with a stunning view of Sydney Harbour below as the Ireland and Lions legend goes back to the darkest moment of his career, the sharpness of his recall revealing just how devastating a blow it was for a player who when fully fit had never been dropped before in his career.
Just three days earlier he had been put up by the Lions management to do a press conference, heightening speculation that the veteran of the 2001, 2005 (when he was tour captain) and 2009 Lions tours, would be asked to captain Gatland's side following their 16-15 defeat in the second Test in Melbourne that had levelled the series. After defeat in Melbourne, the squad had travelled up to Sunshine coast resort of Noosa, in south Queensland.
Without any warning, suddenly he found himself not even in the 23-man squad, with Jonathan Davies switching to outside centre to accommodate his Wales team-mate Jamie Roberts, who had recovered from a hamstring injury, in the midfield. The rugby world was about to explode.
The tap on the shoulder had come from Lions assistant coach Rob Howley and a short meeting with him and head coach Warren Gatland followed. 'It was a quick conversation,' he adds. 'The only thing I said to them was that they should not have put me up for media if they were going to drop me, but they hadn't had any of their coaches' meetings by then.
'At the time I didn't even ask if I was on the bench or not, so when the squad was read out later it dawned on me that I wasn't going to be involved at all. But I got that. I was not a bench player, Manu Tuilagi [who was named on the replacements] had played a bit of wing too, and I had never really played there.
'But the thing for me, is that Foxy [Davies] and Jamie had gone so well together with Wales in the Six Nations. We had beaten them, but they had won the title. So, for me, the best chance of playing in the Test series was also with Manu. We played well together in the first match but then he got injured. Myself and Foxy were not a good partnership, we were both out and out 13s trying to make it work because the other two were injured. We weren't cohesive.'
'My wheels were not the same as they had been on the previous tours, but I had a greater intellect and understanding of seeing the game and timing the pass. I think I was seeing the game as better than ever.'
O'Driscoll went to training and vowed not to let his aching disappointment affect his commitment. 'The big thing that I'd always said when I was captain of Ireland was that the strength of the squad was the non-playing 23 because they're the ones that prep the team,' he adds.
'All of a sudden, I was like, 'Whoa, I'm that guy. You can't be a poacher turned gamekeeper just because it doesn't suit you. Being a good team player can involve selflessness, and you can't be selective on that. It's when you find yourself in it, you gotta live it. And I was proud of my reaction. On the same day that I heard the news, I went to a community event, coaching some kids. They didn't know if I had been picked or not, so I had to make sure I was high on energy and gave them a good day, even though I went back to my room and was crying on the inside. I also did a bit of video work with Foxy and Jamie. I tried not to throw my toys out of the cot.'
'That really wounded me'
He went out for dinner with his family on the Thursday night but was mindful not to drink, just in case he got a late call-up in the event that Roberts' hamstring injury recurred. 'I just wanted to be a good pro and be ready to play if I was needed' Yet when he came down to breakfast on the Friday, there was a message on the whiteboard saying that the non-23 players were not needed at training.
'That really wounded me,' he adds. 'They don't even need me to hold the tackle bags. It knocked me for six because I wanted to still feel part of it, to feel like I was still adding value in some shape or form. That Friday was a long day.'
The match day itself also felt a weird experience. The Lions clinched the series with a thumping victory, but O'Driscoll did not feel part of the celebrations. 'I didn't want to be walking around with the trophy or be in photographs. I only had two-thirds ownership of it. I couldn't force it. If you are not on the field even for a couple of minutes, you feel a bit of a fraud. You have to have had an involvement; you have to have added value. Cheering from the stands was not something I had been used to doing 14 years before that. It was an unusual feeling. The lads went on and won well and the selections were justified.
He hasn't been back to Noosa. 'It is a beautiful, a stunning place so I still have good memories of it. But less so of that team meeting room in our hotel. I don't know if I would want to go back there, where I got the tap on the shoulder.'
'Like anything, it takes a bit of time,' he adds. 'I had considered finishing after the tour but I am glad that I didn't. I went for one more year and had great memories to finish with, we won the URC with Leinster and the Six Nations title in the final game in France.
'But like any disappointment it stays with you for a while. There is nothing you can do. You can't change it.
'When I look back now it doesn't sting any more, but it probably took a couple of years for me to stop thinking 'I really wanted to have been part of that. Now it has zero impact, but jeez you would want it to be like that 12 years later.'
'Andy Farrell is infectious'
O'Driscoll will be in the stands again this Saturday as Andy Farrell's Lions side attempt to make history by completing a clean sweep of victories against Australia, something that has not been done in the professional era. O'Driscoll believes that Farrell should be given the head coach job again in four years' time.
'Three-nil would be real throat on the stuff and Farrell will want that,' he adds. 'From all the sound bites, the players have loved this tour. Faz is infectious with creating a great environment, a fun environment and a competitive environment, and so if it ain't broke, why would you go and try and reinvent things and find an alternative if he was interested again, which I'm sure he would be.'
Brian O'Driscoll is ambassador for Howden Insurance, the principal partner of the Lions Tour. He was speaking as part of their 'Insuring Greatness' campaign