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The Brutal Things Couples Say In Fights That Leave Scars For Years

The Brutal Things Couples Say In Fights That Leave Scars For Years

Yahoo03-06-2025
Fights are inevitable in relationships, but some words hit so deep they leave scars that never really fade. These aren't the dramatic slams or the cliches—you expect those. These are the quiet assassins: the phrases that seem small in the moment but crack the foundation of trust, love, and safety.
This is the ultimate threat in a fight—the suggestion that they're *settling* for you. It plants a seed of doubt that can grow into resentment, insecurity, and constant comparison. According to Integrative Psych, statements that undermine a partner's self-worth can have lasting negative effects on intimacy and trust.
Even if they don't mean it, it becomes a haunting thought: Am I not enough? That question poisons the relationship.
This line cuts deep because it dismisses the other person's feelings as selfishness. It says, 'Your emotions aren't valid—they're just ego.' Over time, it erodes a person's confidence in expressing themselves. As noted by Psych Central, emotional invalidation can make people feel unseen and unheard, damaging the core of connection.
It's not just a criticism—it's an accusation that they're inherently self-centered. And once said, it lingers in the air every time they open up.
Love can survive fights, but *not liking* someone? That's a dagger. It makes your partner question their worth in the relationship—are they lovable only when they're easy? As Verywell Mind points out, feeling disliked by a partner can trigger deep insecurity and anxiety.
This isn't just a heat-of-the-moment comment—it's a fracture in how safe they feel being fully themselves. It leaves them walking on eggshells.
This line feels personal because it drags in family baggage they didn't sign up for. It's an indirect way of saying, 'Your worst traits aren't even yours—they're inherited.' It's not just an insult—it's a multi-generational wound. As Psychology Today highlights, comparing your partner to their parents can be deeply hurtful and lead to long-term resentment.
It makes people feel trapped in a cycle they can't control. And it's a comparison they'll never forget.
This phrase gaslights your partner's emotions, framing them as the problem. It makes them feel like they're 'too much' and that their feelings aren't valid. It's a dismissal, not a conversation.
Over time, it silences people—making them second-guess whether they're allowed to feel anything at all.
This is an existential grenade. It doesn't just attack the moment—it questions the entire relationship. Once that thought is out there, it's impossible to un-hear.
It plants a quiet insecurity that lingers long after the fight ends. You can apologize, but you can't un-say it.
This line diminishes and invalidates your partner's feelings in one shot. It frames them as irrational, overreacting, and emotionally unstable. It's not a disagreement—it's a character judgment.
Once someone feels like they're 'too much' for you, they stop trusting you with their real emotions. That's a slow death for intimacy.
This sweeping generalization turns a single argument into an attack on their entire personality. It traps them in a pattern they can't escape—no matter what they do, they're 'always' wrong.
It's a form of emotional cornering. They'll feel like they can never win, so why even try?
This comment is a subtle way of stripping away your partner's agency. It's belittling, dismissive, and designed to make them feel small. Even if you think you're pointing out immaturity, you're actually creating distance.
No one wants to feel parented by their partner. It shifts the dynamic from equal to unequal—and that's corrosive.
Throwing the relationship itself on the table during a fight is a power move that destabilizes everything. It says, 'I could walk away at any time, and you should fear that.' It turns conflict into a negotiation for survival.
This threat becomes a shadow over every future disagreement. It erodes trust, because now the floor can drop out at any moment.
This statement flips the narrative entirely, positioning one person as inherently better, more valuable, or more desirable. It's not just a criticism—it's an assertion of superiority.
It makes the other person feel small, unworthy, and replaceable. That's a wound that lingers long after the fight is over.
Comparing your partner to someone else—an ex, a friend, or even a celebrity—is a punch to the gut. It says, 'You're not enough as you are, and here's who you *should* be.' It makes them feel like they're competing in a game they can't win.
It's a form of emotional sabotage. And it's almost impossible to recover from fully.
This is the ultimate blame-shift. It puts the entire weight of the relationship's struggles on one person's shoulders, absolving the other of any responsibility. It's not just an insult—it's a verdict.
That kind of scapegoating is a relationship-killer. It makes your partner feel like there's no room for growth—only blame.
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Why stress during pregnancy affects your baby's gut health
Why stress during pregnancy affects your baby's gut health

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time2 days ago

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Why stress during pregnancy affects your baby's gut health

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Why Some Men Walk Away From Their Wives After Decades Together
Why Some Men Walk Away From Their Wives After Decades Together

Yahoo

time5 days ago

  • Yahoo

Why Some Men Walk Away From Their Wives After Decades Together

Sometimes, after decades of shared experiences, laughter, and challenges, men decide to walk away from their marriages. It's a moment that can surprise everyone around them, leaving friends and family scrambling to understand what happened. While every marriage is unique, there are common threads that might explain why some men decide to leave. It's essential to recognize these reasons not to place blame but to foster understanding and, perhaps, create conversations that might prevent such an outcome. Here are 15 reasons why some men might choose this path. 1. They Start Craving Growth After years of being in a relationship, some men find themselves craving personal growth and new experiences. The routine of marriage may start to feel stifling, and they yearn for something more fulfilling. According to a study by Lisa Firestone, Ph.D., published in Psychology Today, many people experience a desire for self-discovery during midlife, which can lead to significant life changes. This desire often isn't about escaping the relationship but rather about exploring untapped potential or interests. Unfortunately, this pursuit sometimes requires distancing themselves from familiar surroundings, including their spouses. For many, the need for personal growth can be a catalyst for wanting a fresh start. This isn't to say that growth can't occur within a marriage, but some men may feel it necessitates stepping away from their current life. They might feel a renewed interest in hobbies, rekindling friendships, or even changing careers. These changes can lead to them evaluating their role within their marriage and whether it's compatible with their future aspirations. When the marriage no longer aligns with their personal goals, they may choose to walk away. 2. The Emotional Connection Is Gone Emotional intimacy can be as vital as physical connection, yet it's often overlooked. Over time, some men may feel that the emotional bond with their wives has weakened or even disappeared. They might find it difficult to communicate their feelings or feel their emotional needs are not being met. This can lead to a sense of loneliness, even when they're physically present in the relationship. Without addressing these feelings, they may start contemplating leaving to find a more fulfilling emotional connection elsewhere. Men often internalize their struggles with emotional intimacy, which can exacerbate the distance between couples. They may avoid discussing their feelings due to fear of conflict or not wanting to appear vulnerable. This can create a vicious cycle, where the lack of emotional connection leads to more withdrawal, further deepening the rift. It's not uncommon for unresolved emotional disconnection to eventually result in the end of a marriage. The absence of emotional interaction can make them feel like two strangers living under the same roof, prompting one to leave. 3. They're Experiencing Midlife Crisis The term "midlife crisis" is often joked about but can be a profound experience for many men. This phase typically brings about a strong urge to reassess life choices and consider different paths. According to psychologist Carl Jung, a midlife crisis can spark significant personal change, causing people to question their identity and purpose. During this period, some men might feel the need to reinvent themselves, which can lead to drastic decisions, such as leaving a marriage. They are often in search of something that reaffirms their vitality and relevance in the world. Navigating a midlife crisis can be tumultuous and might involve significant emotional upheaval. Men experiencing this often seek to make up for lost time, eager to pursue dreams or interests they previously set aside. 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The struggle with identity loss can come from various aspects, such as career changes, retirement, or simply the passage of time. Men may feel that their personal needs and desires have been sidelined in favor of family obligations. This internal conflict can create tension within the marriage, as they may feel misunderstood or unsupported in their journey of self-discovery. The need to reclaim their identity can become a powerful motivator to make significant life changes. Leaving the marriage might be seen as a necessary step towards finding themselves again. 10. Their Health Issues Have Shaken Them Up Health issues, whether physical or mental, can put considerable strain on a marriage. When one partner struggles with health problems, it can alter the dynamics of the relationship significantly. Some men might feel overwhelmed by the added responsibilities or the changes in lifestyle that health issues bring. 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Ultimately, the pursuit of excitement and novelty might lead them to step away from the marriage in search of something that reignites their passion for life. 12. They Grew Apart Years Ago Over time, people evolve, and their interests, values, and priorities can change. For some men, this natural progression leads to a realization that they have grown apart from their spouse. They might find themselves with little in common with their partner, feeling more like roommates than a couple. This growing apart can result in a lack of connection and understanding, creating an emotional distance that's hard to bridge. As the gap widens, they might decide that leaving is the best course of action to find a relationship that aligns better with who they have become. The feeling of growing apart often sneaks up gradually, making it hard to pinpoint when things started to change. Men might notice that their conversations lack depth or that shared activities no longer bring joy. This gradual drift can create a sense of loneliness, even within the partnership. Without conscious effort to reconnect and rediscover common ground, the relationship can feel empty. In these situations, leaving might seem like the only way to pursue a connection that feels more authentic and fulfilling. 13. They're Influenced By Other People External relationships, whether friendships or family connections, can have a profound impact on a marriage. Influences from outside the marriage can create tension, especially if boundaries are unclear. Some men might feel torn between these relationships and their spouse, leading to conflict and resentment. Over time, these external pressures can strain the marriage, making it difficult to maintain a harmonious relationship. The decision to leave might stem from a desire to escape these external influences and find peace. Navigating external relationships requires a delicate balance of loyalty and boundaries. Men might feel that they are constantly mediating between their spouse and other important people in their lives. This can create stress and tension, as they might feel they are not meeting anyone's expectations fully. The pressure to maintain harmony can be overwhelming, leading to feelings of frustration and inadequacy. Ultimately, leaving might be seen as a way to alleviate the stress and prioritize personal well-being. 14. Their Love Life Is Non-Existent Physical intimacy plays a vital role in fostering closeness and connection within a marriage. When physical affection diminishes, it can create a sense of distance and dissatisfaction. Some men might feel rejected or undesirable when their partner shows little interest in physical intimacy. This absence can lead to feelings of loneliness and a longing for physical connection. Over time, the lack of intimacy can become a significant issue, prompting them to consider leaving the marriage. The decline in physical intimacy often coincides with other relationship stresses, creating a cycle of resentment and withdrawal. Men might feel frustrated and disconnected, impacting their self-esteem and emotional well-being. This can lead to misunderstandings and a breakdown in communication, further eroding the relationship. Addressing these challenges often requires open dialogue and a willingness to reconnect. However, if the situation remains unresolved, they might decide that leaving is the only way to fulfill their physical and emotional needs. 15. The Mutual Respect Has Left The Building Mutual respect is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, and without it, a marriage can quickly deteriorate. Some men might find themselves in situations where respect has eroded, whether through constant criticism, belittling, or disregard for boundaries. This lack of respect can lead to a toxic environment, where one or both partners feel undervalued and hurt. Over time, this can lead to resentment and a desire to escape the negativity. Leaving might be seen as a way to restore their sense of dignity and find a more respectful partnership. The erosion of respect often stems from unresolved conflicts and poor communication. Criticism and disrespect can become habitual, creating a negative cycle that's difficult to break. Men might feel helpless and trapped, with their efforts to improve the situation going unacknowledged. The absence of respect can make the relationship feel more like a battleground than a partnership. In such cases, leaving might appear to be the only viable option to find peace and a relationship built on mutual respect. Solve the daily Crossword

Bread may be to blame for your depression and fatigue — and cause schizophrenia
Bread may be to blame for your depression and fatigue — and cause schizophrenia

New York Post

time24-07-2025

  • New York Post

Bread may be to blame for your depression and fatigue — and cause schizophrenia

There's bad news for carboholics. A growing body of research suggests that eating bread, pasta and other grain products may trigger or worsen a wide range of psychological symptoms, including depression, anxiety and even schizophrenia. Experts warn that some people could be especially at risk, with these mealtime staples quietly sabotaging their brains every time they take a bite. 4 A protein widely found in bread, pasta and other grains could be why some people are depressed or anxious. Westend61 – Advertisement The key culprit, researchers theorize, is gluten. This naturally occurring protein — found in wheat, barley and rye — acts as a binder that gives baked goods and other foods their structure and chew. For most, it's harmless. But in others, gluten sensitivity can trigger a range of unpleasant symptoms, including bloating, diarrhea, constipation, fatigue, headaches and joint pain, according to the Cleveland Clinic. Advertisement In more serious cases, it can develop into celiac disease, an autoimmune disorder in which the body mistakes gluten for a harmful invader, like a virus. The resulting immune response triggers inflammation and damage in the small intestine — but the effects may go far beyond digestion. 'Inflammation that starts in the gut doesn't stay in the gut. [It] can have a damaging effect on the brain,' Dr. Emeran Mayer, a gastroenterologist and neuroscientist, told Psychology Today. 'When immune cells are activated, the vagus nerve system sends a signal to the brain that can trigger fatigue and depression-like behavior,' he noted. 4 Most traditional bread products contain gluten. bukhta79 – Advertisement In children, that can look like irritability or symptoms of ADHD. In adults, it may show up as brain fog, mood disorders or more serious psychiatric conditions. Take depression, for example. While around 8% of the general population is diagnosed with major depressive disorder at some point in their lives, studies suggest that people with celiac disease are hit much harder — with some research putting the rate as high as 30%. Celiac disease has also been linked to a greater risk of anxiety, panic disorder and even schizophrenia. In fact, one study found that people with celiac are three times more likely to develop schizophrenia than those without the condition. Advertisement Beyond inflammation, research suggests that damage to the gut lining caused by gluten sensitivity may also contribute to these mental health issues. That damage can interfere with the absorption of nutrients essential for brain function, including B vitamins, iron, vitamin D, magnesium and zinc. Deficiencies in any of these can lead to a variety of psychological symptoms. 4 Some studies suggest a potential link between celiac disease and an increased risk of developing schizophrenia. andriano_cz – Scientists have also found that people with schizophrenia often test positive for high levels of antibodies linked to gluten sensitivity, hinting at a possible connection between the two. These antibodies can cross the placenta, and studies show that mothers with elevated levels may increase the risk of psychosis in their children. 'We don't know everything. But it's another step closer connecting the dots about these illnesses,' Deanna L. Kelly, a psychiatry professor at the University of Maryland School of Medicine who has spent the past 15 years leading clinical trials in schizophrenia and severe mental illness, told The Telegraph. Can a gluten-free diet help? The research is mixed. Advertisement Some studies have found that a gluten-free diet can ease anxiety, depression and neurological complications in people with celiac disease or gluten sensitivity. 4 Some people with gluten sensitivity experience mood changes, including depression. SHOTPRIME STUDIO – In one trial, participants with celiac reported lower anxiety levels after following a gluten-free diet for a year. Advertisement But others show no significant improvement — and in some cases, anxiety levels remained elevated even after cutting gluten. Some experts think part of the problem may come from the psychological stress of managing a chronic health condition. 'Being on a gluten-free diet can also lead to some of these psychiatric or mental health issues, because you have to be somewhat hyper-vigilant,' Debra Silberg, a gastroenterologist and chief science officer at Beyond Celiac, told Discover Magazine. 'There's also a fear of going out and becoming exposed to gluten,' she added. Advertisement Across the country, about 1 in every 133 people — roughly 1% of the US population — is estimated to have celiac disease, according to Beyond Celiac. That adds up to around 2 million Americans. Researchers believe the number of people affected by gluten intolerance is much higher. Studies estimate that about 6% of the US population — or roughly 20 million people — may be sensitive to gluten.

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