From an icy first date at the Frog Pond to a wedding that was pure fire
studying criminal justice at Boston University at the time. He remembered Boston Common offers free ice skating on the Frog Pond. 'But guess what...? I don't know how to skate.'
For the wedding, Bethel had one design request: a mirrored aisle. "She didn't care if we didn't do the fireworks, the fire sparkles, the boat, the smoke," remembers Daniel. "She just cared about the aisle." After the two saw their wedding video, Daniel admits: "Yeah, great touch."
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He decided to wing it anyway.
They met at CVS in South Station. Bethel remembers Daniel's curls and puffy blue jacket; he was cute, 'chatty, and very easy-going.' He brought her to the Common, proposing they take a spin on the rink.
'She was like, '
Not a chance
,'' remembers Daniel. Bethel also did not skate — and 'I'm not planning to,' she says.
They sat on a bench and tried to brainstorm a new plan while the winter wind nipped, and an hour or so passed by. Daniel accompanied her back to South Station, where they kissed in an elevator before she left for her train.
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Daniel's six-year-old nephew Elmar served as ring bearer for the ceremony.
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FaceTimes and texts filled the in-between until weekend trips to their respective campuses became the norm. They discussed the future — their hopes and goals for work, family, and building generational wealth. Both help out their close-knit Ethiopian families and are one of four siblings (Bethel, the eldest, with a brother and two sisters; Daniel the third
of four boys.)
On Valentine's Day 2015, a romantic evening in Boston turned into three when
$9
an hour
,' repeats Daniel — and trekked through the snow to pick up water and food while they waited out the storm. It was an expensive surprise for a new couple, but the bond they built during that weekend, they agree, was worth it.
'Spending those three days early on in our relationship was extremely important because we got to know each other even better.'
Following the ceremony, the couple changed into Ethiopian wedding attire for the next series of events. They arrived for lunch and additional celebrations via a boat across the lake on the venue's property.
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When Bethel graduated from Colby-Sawyer in May 2017
and considered leaving New England to job search, 'he stepped in and was like, 'I'll move out from my family house and then we can move in together,'' she remembers.
Related
:
Starting that July, Daniel
— a full-time student with two jobs — covered the rent for their shared Dorchester apartment for six months while she searched for a position. Once employed, she told him she'd cover the next six. 'Bethel is extremely independent,' adds Daniel.
To Bethel, his gesture came with a far more meaningful message: 'That meant he really cares... he makes me feel loved.'
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Beyond their Maldives engagement and wedding in Portugal, the couple are frequent flyers and say they actually prefer travel that immerses them in the local community: "We love going to new places, not resorts. ... actually see how locals live to get different perspectives in life," says Daniel.
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'I think about the future a lot,' he says. 'I invest my time now for a better future tomorrow.'
'He doesn't always talk about 'What are we gonna do today?' It's about in 10 years, in 15, 20 years,' says Bethel.
When Bethel got into nursing school, she kept her full-time pharmaceuticals job while pursuing her degree. His focus on a shared future had started to rub off on her.
'He motivates me,' Bethel, now a psychiatric nurse practitioner, says. 'It was satisfying — especially at my graduation — all the work we did, all the support he gave me.'
Daniel recalls giving Bethel a designer handbag for her graduation, only to see the funds back in his bank account soon after. She said she was grateful, but 'we're not at a level where I get to carry a $2,500 bag yet,' he remembers. 'I fell in
love again.'
Daniel hired a photography service through the Maldives resort where they stayed to capture the proposal. He'd originally planned to propose during a trip they'd had to cancel for her birthday.
Provided
Their financial decisions prioritized buying property and planning for a family, but also a celebratory fund, for things like birthday trips and going out to eat. (Both partners identify as foodies.) 'Along the way, we made sure we enjoyed ourselves,' says Daniel.
Daniel proposed to Bethel on a trip to the Maldives they planned for his birthday in March 2024. He had coordinated with the hotel to stage a photoshoot by the beach, and as Bethel turned toward the water, he dropped to a knee in the sand. They'd discussed getting engaged far in advance, but it didn't take away from the emotional surprise.
'It was everything and even more,' Bethel says.
Following their celebration in Braga, the couple and some of their friends and family returned to Porto where post-wedding festivities continued for another day.
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Bethel and Daniel, now 30 and 29, wed on May 9, with a multi-day destination wedding celebration with 94 guests in Portugal.
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At first, the newly engaged couple agreed not to do anything fancy. But a few months later: 'I started getting Instagram reels with wedding ideas,' says Daniel with a laugh. 'We did it big.'
Their wedding events began Thursday with a welcome party at
To mark the occasion, the couple exchanged 'dream' gifts. A Rolex watch for him, a gown by
The couple ran through a tunnel of sparklers held by guests while Shallipopi's "Laho" played en route to their cake cutting ceremony. Following the cake and fireworks, guests returned to the reception for dancing
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They had a seated dinner, followed by a cake ceremony and a 'fire cascade' performance set by the venue's lake. Smoke and showers of sparkling fireworks went off as Meek Mill's 'Dreams and Nightmares' played.
Their first dance was to 'You Are the Reason' by Calum Scott and Leona Lewis. Neither claims dancing expertise; they practiced the day before. After more than a decade of moving in synch, they weren't concerned.
'We went with the flow,' says Daniel. 'We pulled it off. Really good.'
Read more from
, The Boston Globe's new weddings column.
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Rachel Kim Raczka is a writer and editor in Boston. She can be reached at
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Time Magazine
14 hours ago
- Time Magazine
‘When We See Refugees, We Should See Opportunity'
It was heartbreak that almost ended Faduma Abukar. But an opportunity enabled her to turn it into a new beginning. For years, the Somali refugee had treated painting as a lonely release while living in the Ethiopian capital Addis Ababa, a catharsis to express the pain and frustration of being stuck in a foreign land with few prospects and an uncertain future. Every time Faduma's mother went to the local Internet café to speak to their father, who was toiling as a migrant worker 5,000 miles away in northern Europe, she would beg the manager for scraps of used printing paper to bring home to Faduma and her six sisters. The family had no television at home and barely enough food—just two meals a day of rice and vegetables. 'Meat was a real luxury we had maybe once every three months,' Faduma, 26, tells TIME. As refugees without official documentation, school or official work was out of reach, rendering drawing and painting their only escape from a bleak existence inside those four walls. 'Because we did have money, we just had to stay at home,' Faduma recalls. 'You cannot go to school; you cannot really go outside.' A childhood friend who had earlier moved from Addis to Canada and had been suggested as a possible husband for Faduma offered a ray of hope. 'My mom loved him; my sisters loved him,' she says. 'He was really the perfect guy for me.' But there was a problem. As the suitor belonged to a rival Somali tribe, Faduma's father stubbornly refused to sanction the union. 'He was so angry,' recalls Faduma. Around the same time, a dear cousin of Faduma's died after falling into a deep depression sparked by her parents similarly rejecting a love match. 'I saw my cousin getting sicker and I thought I faced the same destiny,' recalls Faduma, eyes welling. Faduma's heartbreak and ongoing acrimony with her father led her to embrace art as a form of therapy, pouring her pain and rage onto the page. Then, in late 2022, Faduma heard that the French Embassy was calling for submissions for murals on its perimeter wall to celebrate 125 years of bilateral relations with Ethiopia. Despite no formal artistic experience or training, Faduma's application was accepted. 'It was really such a big wall!' she recalls. 'But they give us many colors, brushes, and everything. I was so happy to paint there.' The result is remarkable: a wave of primary pointillism as a lone figure aided by supporting hands pushes away a grey tableau of grim torture. This highly acclaimed work brought Faduma into contact with more local artists and with it more opportunities. Before long, her work was featured in UNICEF's U-Report Ethiopia program, and she has since even held a solo exhibition. Today, Faduma's paintings fetch several hundred dollars—enough to support her family and provide some semblance of independence. 'I think art saved my life,' says Faduma. 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Raba Abdur fled her native Sudan to Ethiopia in 2011 and is currently studying psychology after winning a scholarship from a University in Kenya. 'I want to be a counselor as my community, especially women and girls, face a lot of issues in the camps,' she says. 'Some of them get married early and can't continue school. So I really want to help educate them.' As well as easing access to documentation, the UNHCR is also moving away from housing refugees in the archetypal tented refugee camp, embracing a new paradigm dubbed Solutions from the Start in partnership with donors such as the World Bank and African Development Bank. When a crisis occurs, instead of setting up tent cities with food, education, healthcare, sanitation, and other necessary services, refugees are housed within existing communities, which have their infrastructure and facilities augmented by donor funding. Hospitals receive more doctors and beds; schools get more classrooms and teachers. Not only is it inclusive but it's also cost efficient, because it eliminates the need for expensive parallel systems. 'It enhances the existing facilities for nationals and also expands them to include refugees,' says Andrew Mbogori, UNHCR Representative for Ethiopia. 'This builds quite a lot in terms of cohesion between refugees and the host community.' More than 70,000 Sudanese refugees fleeing the nation's civil war have been hosted among existing communities in Ethiopia's Benishangul-Gumuz region, as well as another 50,000 Somalis in its border region of Bokh. 'There are no parallel arrangements at all,' says Mbogori. 'It's an expansion of already existing [services], which is a win-win situation.' However, integrating refugees and granting them rights remains politically sensitive. While donors are generally in favor of integrated communities, Mbogori says that the hardest challenge is getting governments on board. Drastic cuts to USAID—which had allocated $12.7 billion to sub-Saharan Africa in 2024, including 1.2 billion for Ethiopia—has spurred a growing realization that integrating displaced people and allowing them to contribute to the local economy can turn a perceived burden into a boon. 'When we see refugees, we should see opportunity,' says Mbogori. 'They can fend for themselves and come with a lot of skills.' Faduma is no stranger to the challenges of displacement camps and scant legal status. Like many refugees, her story is complex. Although ethnically Somalian, her parents fled her homeland's civil war in 1992 to Yemen, entrusting their lives to people smugglers on board a boat that ended up spending 16 days at sea with no food and water. 'Many people died, including my cousin and grandma,' Faduma says. 'Afterwards, my parents had a really big phobia of boats.' 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In the end, a refugee whose son had just died allowed the family to stay in the extra tent that had been allotted for the funeral preparations. 'It was so cramped with all of us in there that if you fell asleep on one side you couldn't turn over,' recalls Faduma. The family found the camp a frightening place, especially for eight women staying alone. 'Whenever we went to get water, people would chase us,' recalls Faduma. 'Men would tell my mom, 'You have a lot of girls, why don't you give us one of them, and then we can make things easy for you.'' Before long, the family decided to go back to Addis. However, leaving the camp meant they were no longer eligible to receive healthcare, education, and other services provided by the UNHCR. 'But our main purpose was to get the refugee card,' says Faduma. 'And the situation in the camp was miserable. So we went back to the city.' Advocates for Solutions from the Start say another benefit of the scheme is that refugees are no longer beholden to camps for basic services. Moreover, providing refugees legal working status removes opportunities for exploitation and graft. Often in host countries with poor governance a gray economy emerges where undocumented migrants must bribe venal officials for documentation to live or work. Faduma herself worked for seven years teaching Arabic at a local school in Addis before receiving her Fayda ID. 'I never heard of a refugee who was refused a job because they didn't have a work permit,' says Faduma. 'But they might not pay you fairly and use the fact you are a refugee to make problems for you.' In many places refugee populations are ostensibly permanent. The presumption that refugees move over borders for just a few weeks to escape some crisis then quickly return home is pollyannaish. The typical stay of refugees in Ethiopia is some 15 years, says Mbogori. In southern Lebanon, almost half-a-million Palestinian refugees have lived in cramped displacement camps for decades, remaining largely stateless without access to public services while facing restrictions on employment and property ownership. At Thailand's riparian border with Myanmar, at least 90,000 refugees have lived in nine camps under similar conditions since the early 1980s. 'Governments in Southeast Asia still look at refugees through a national security lens and have an extremely allergic reaction to any sort of integration into the local community,' says Phil Robertson, the Bangkok-based director of Asia Human Rights and Labour Advocates. Objectors to refugee integration often talk about a 'magnet effect,' whereby making conditions easy for refugees will encourage more to arrive. And certainly there's a correlation between progressive policies and refugee numbers. 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Cosmopolitan
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Yahoo
a day ago
- Yahoo
The Bride Designed Her Own Blue Wedding Dress for Her Contemporary Outdoor Nuptials in New York's Hudson Valley
The duo tied the knot between two rows of maple trees. Niki Korman and Sage Usher connected on Hinge in the early days of the pandemic. They had both just left New York City for their respective hometowns, and they didn't realize how long they'd be away from the city—ultimately, the lockdown restrictions gave them a chance to get to know each other virtually, and when things opened up a few months later, they got together for their first date in the Big Apple. In June of 2022, Sage proposed to Niki at the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens. Shortly after their engagement, they stumbled upon Wildflower Farms in Gardiner, New York; the beautiful locale stopped them mid-Instagram scroll, and they wasted no time booking a little Valentine's Day getaway to the Hudson Valley hideaway. 'We had such an amazing time and loved the property that once we knew it was the only option for us,' Niki says. 'When we were there, we pictured all of our family and friends there together, enjoying both the indoor and outdoor activities together on top of the beautiful hotel itself.' And that's exactly what Niki and Sage did. They envisioned an elevated camp weekend with activities like tennis, hiking, and pottery for guests to enjoy, so they planned three days of events with help from the team at Pat Glenn Productions. The celebrations kicked off with a rehearsal dinner with their families on Friday night, which was followed by a welcome party for all guests on Saturday. The next day, on September 1, 2024, the couple exchanged vows beneath a canopy of maple trees with 165 of their closest loved ones watching. Their goal was to let the natural beauty of their venue shine, but they also knew they wanted a tented reception that could later transition into a club-like after-party. Read on to see how the details came together—from the bride's blue wedding dress and the dainty ceremony florals to the textural wooden elements and high-energy after-party—in these photos by Kristin Piteo. Related: 17 Botanical Wedding Ideas for a Naturally Beautiful Affair Niki and Sage invited their immediate families to join them for a rehearsal dinner on the porch at Wildflower Farms the Friday before their wedding. There, everyone enjoyed a family-style meal while sitting at one long, communal table. A live musician performed throughout the evening, and the intimate, family-centric event was the perfect way for Niki and Sage to kick off their wedding weekend. On Saturday, guests were encouraged to enjoy activities on the property. Cocktail making, tennis lessons, hiking, pottery classes, and focaccia making were all on offer. After a busy day, Niki and Sage invited all of their 160 guests to join them for a welcome party, which was held on the great porch and spilled inside to the hotel's Clay restaurant. Niki wore a Jean Paul Gaultier dress featuring suspender buckle straps paired with Valentino heels and a Bottega Veneta clutch, which she paired with jewelry borrowed from her grandmother. Niki owns the clothing brand TT Studios, so she worked with Sage to create his custom matching set for the pre-wedding event. He accessorized with white sneakers and a Hublot watch. The indoor-outdoor welcome party ensured that guests were able to enjoy all that the property had to offer. 'It had a very nice indoor-outdoor flow to it,' the bride says. Later that night, the couple moved the party into the green room below the restaurant which acts as a speakeasy. 'We had a bartender down there and music—it turned into a full on dance party until 1 a.m., which was a lot of fun!' Niki remembers. Niki knew she wanted to wear blue on her wedding day, and as the owner and designer of TT Studios, she decided to create her own wedding and after-party dresses. She dreamt up a slim-fitting silk dress with hand beading and a plunging neckline for her walk down the aisle, and it was the only bridal look she tried on throughout the process. 'I do partly regret not going to bridal stores to try dresses on in a more traditional fashion,' Niki admits. 'I think it would've been nice to do so with my mom but also it would've maybe given me more ideas with my own design. Ultimately, it all worked out well and I was happy with the result of my design.' She accessorized with Amina Maudi heels, her grandmother's diamond bracelet and earrings, blue earrings she borrowed from her mom as her "something blue," and custom rings from Louis Newman Jeweler. Related: 13 Best Colorful Wedding Dresses You Can Buy Right Now Niki shared a memorable first look with her dad on the morning of the wedding. He wore custom heart-shaped cufflinks featuring a photo of them together when the bride was a child. Sage wore a black tuxedo and shoes from Dior, which he accessorized with a Rolex watch that was a wedding gift from his bride. Niki and Sage wanted to have a first look before the ceremony to make sure they had time for photos. They kept it light and casual, and remember it being a fun way to kick off the celebrations. 'We both laughed,' Niki says. 'We are not super emotional people and we giggled and gave each other a hug and kiss. It was very nice, but quite on brand for us.' Related: Everything to Know About First Looks—Plus, 20 Examples to Inspire You The couple's ceremony took place outside beneath two rows of maple trees. Wooden chairs were arranged on either side of the aisle, facing in, and loose wildflower-inspired floral arrangements of white blooms, greenery, and grasses were displayed at intervals. The aisle itself was created with a platform that had been covered in astroturf to blend into the existing landscape. 'I wanted the chuppah to flow and connect within the trees to look natural,' Niki says, so the floral team weaved it into the canopy of trees with vines and cascading white flowers. The couple hired live musicians to play acoustic versions of some of their favorite songs for the ceremony prelude and processional. Sage walked down the aisle with his parents to 'Smile' by Uncle Cracker. Niki's parents walked her down the aisle to an acoustic guitar version of Kacey Musgraves' 'Rainbow," which the bride says has always been an important song to them. Niki held a bouquet of white wildflowers finished with a diamond brooch that Sage's mother gifted her. Niki's grandfather, Steven, officiated the couple's ceremony. Instead of exchanging personalized vows during the ceremony, the duo elected to write their words to one another and share their promises in cards on the wedding morning. Then, at the ceremony, they swapped traditional vows. One they were announced as husband and wife, the newlyweds recessed to 'Heaven' by Avicii as guests showered them in flower petals. Guests gathered around a circular bar on the open-air patio during cocktail hour. An oversized arrangement of greenery with pops of white flowers was displayed in a large ceramic urn as the focal point of the space. Everyone mingled and enjoyed passed appetizers and drinks before making their way to the tent for the reception. Ivory draping lined the walls of the reception tent, and the space was filled with a mix of round wooden tables and farm tables dressed with white gauzy table runners. Plenty of white candles at varying heights were used throughout the space, lending a warm glow to the tent. "I had a clear vision of a ceiling flower installation,' Niki explains. "Because of that, I wanted the flowers on the tables to be more dainty and whimsical." The place settings featured wildflower chargers and custom distressed linen menus, which the bride sourced from a company in London. Niki and Sage shared their first dance to the tune of Rex Orange County's 'Loving Is Easy." Then, their band played Carol King's 'You've Got a Friend' for a combined father-daughter and mother-son dance. 'The band was incredibly talented and we loved how their dancing got the crowd going on the dance floor,' the bride says. The Hora was one of the couple's standout memories from the night. 'Sage's friends in Toronto have a special styled Canadian Hora where they get very rowdy and excited,' Niki says. 'It brought amazing energy to start the night.' The couple wanted their reception to transition straight into an after-party, and their planning team and band helped ensure that happened. 'We knew we wanted an extreme juxtaposition at the after-party—a full-blown club built in a barn-like setting,' the bride explains. 'Everyone was enjoying how much it resembled a real club.' Niki designed a fitted dress with long sleeves, a keyhole detail, and hand-beaded accents as her after-party look. 'I initially designed it being shorter, but it felt a little too young and wanted a bit more of a mature look so decided to make it longer,' she explains. She styled her look with her grandmother's double diamond bracelet and Rene Caovilla shoes. The couple and their guests danced all night long, which was exactly what Niki and Sage dreamed of. Their late-night DJ was integral in keeping the dance floor packed. "Niki found our DJ on TikTok and we have become fans of his going to his shows in New York City,' Sage explains. After the wedding, the duo spent nearly a month traveling through Thailand, Vietnam, and Weddings Credits Photographer Kristin Piteo Planning, Design, Flowers, and Rentals Pat Glenn Productions Venue, Catering, and Accommodations Wildflower Farms Bride's Hair Duke Duquette Bride's Makeup Cat Mignano Invitations Paperless Post Reception Music Element Music After-Party Music Luke Alexander Videographer Kenneth CooperUp Next: 40 Décor Ideas for a Dreamy Forest Wedding Read the original article on Brides Solve the daily Crossword
