Proposed changes to divorce law could end blame game
The current law requires couples to either go through a lengthy separation before a divorce is granted, or proceedings can begin straight away if one person is at fault either through desertion, adultery, or unreasonable behaviour.
Joan Davis, CEO of counselling service Relate NI, said the current law is "outdated and not in keeping with modern society and how relationships come and go - it's just the reality of life".
The biggest issue, she said, is the length of time that a couple must be separated before being able to begin the process.
Currently, a couple is unable to apply for a divorce, or in the case of a civil partnership - a dissolution, within the first two years of marriage.
Once that time period has been reached, a divorce petition must be based on at least one of five reasons:
two years' separation with the consent of the other spouse to divorce
five years' separation
unreasonable behaviour
adultery
desertion
The same grounds apply for the dissolution of a civil partnership, with the exception of adultery.
The most recent figures for Northern Ireland show that the majority of people who filed for divorce in 2023 list separation as the reason.
"Why would a legal system and a society want to persecute people more when a relationship is broken down by keeping them tied together and increasing that level of anxiety, adding to an already huge mental health crisis?," Ms Davis told BBC News NI.
"Divorce numbers aren't going to change, and if they do change the legislation there's not going to be a rush of people running to the courts for divorce."
Ms Davis said blaming one person for the end of the marriage can have a negative impact on the wider family unit.
"Is that a good thing for a parent to be doing, you know? So the children then know how bad that other parent is?
"If mum or dad has spent so much time explaining how bad they are, and it's all their fault, it's really not good for family life."
Finance Minister John O'Dowd said the options being put forward "could reduce the conflict that can arise from divorce or dissolution".
"Many marriages and civil partnerships are loving, happy and last a lifetime, but unfortunately some don't and break down for a number of reasons," he said.
"This can have a devastating effect on those families, especially where children are involved, and can lead to additional and unnecessary conflict."
Clare Curran, Director at Curran Bowles family law, said Northern Ireland's divorce laws are "very antiquated", adding that they should "fall in line with the English system".
She said the two systems used to be similar, but after many Stormont collapses Northern Ireland has fallen behind in terms of "modernising the application for divorce process".
"It doesn't work. It's slow and arduous, so everybody just gets into this blame game, which is really contentious and actually expensive."
Ms Curran said it's about "striking the right balance, making sure that it's not too easy".
"You don't want to dilute the meaning of marriage and the importance of the consequence of marriage by making it super easy to be able to dissolve a marriage.
"Since the reform in England, it's only been a positive thing. It makes the process easier, more accessible, quicker and cheaper.
"So, what's not to like about that?"
The alternative options included in the consultation are largely based around how divorce works in the Republic of Ireland, England and Wales.
The first is for the current law to remain the same with no change.
Second, is the introduction of an administrative, no-fault divorce, similar to what is offered in England Wales.
This means that one person can apply for a divorce and does not need to prove a reason why beyond the breakdown of the relationship.
Supporters say it allows for a quicker, less contentious divorce with the process typically taking around 6 months.
The third option is also a no-fault divorce, but closer to what is in place in the Republic of Ireland.
Like option two, this means that no specific reason has to be provided to instigate proceedings, and no-one has to take blame for the end of the marriage.
However, it's a lengthier process, as the couple does have to show they have lived apart for at least two out of the three previous years and that there is no possibility of reconciliation.
The consultation will run until 26 September.
End of blame game in divorce laws
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