LGBTQ+ seniors find safety and joy in North Carolina retirement village
Durham, North Carolina — There's more than just wine and cheese on the menu at happy hour at Village Hearth in Durham, North Carolina.
The retirement village serves up a safe space for people 55 and older who identify as LGBTQ+. It's one of the nation's first co-housing developments created specifically for an aging, queer population — like 73-year-old Barb Chase.
"I lived my life pretty much in the closet, and I was ready for an experience that was super affirming," Chase said.
The 28 single-story pastel-colored cottages are individually owned, but connected physically by walking paths and ideologically by acceptance.
"As we age, community is one of the most important things to ensure our continued health," Chase said.
Over seven million LGBTQ Americans will be over age 50 by 2030, according to the Human Rights Campaign. Fewer than half of states have laws prohibiting housing discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity — and there is no federal law.
That's why Margaret Roesch and her wife created Village Hearth more than five years ago when they couldn't find somewhere to retire.
"I know if we ever ended up in assisted living or in a nursing home that we would have had to go back in the closet, potentially," Roesch said.
Patricia Stressler and Tami Ike moved to Village Hearth from about an hour away in Greensboro, where they lived hiding their relationship.
"We're still in that generation where we don't want to make people feel uncomfortable," Ike said.
Like many gay and lesbian seniors, the couple doesn't have the traditional safety net of adult children for connection and care. With this community comes built-in support from each other.
"I think there is a small percentage of people who are very close-minded, and I think just for day-to-day living, wanting to be comfortable every day, not having to be on guard for anything or anyone," Stressler said.
"I feel like we're going backwards, and so I think this type of community is needed more," Ike said.
For these seniors — trailblazing for decades — it's a chapter with fewer struggles and more happy hours.
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