I lived in a caravan park for six months. Here are 10 things I learnt

Sydney Morning Herald

15-07-2025

You've been down the #vanlife rabbit hole, traipsed around your local Caravan and Camping Expo and finally bought your own caravan (or hired one), now it's time to hit the road. So, what are the ground rules, you ask?
After many trips across and around Australia in a Kombi, motorhome and caravan, and a recent six-month stint in a beachside caravan park while renovating our house (see legislation.nsw.gov.au; consumer.vic.gov.au for rules about long-term stays), I've done the hard yards for you. Here are my top 10 lessons.
No one judges your setup, only your parking skills
Watching a newcomer set up his rig is the best show in town, especially if it coincides with happy hour. Here's how it goes; the men will stand around, watching for a few minutes before sauntering over. 'Right hand down. A bit more. Keep going. Yep, now straighten up.' A crowd gathers, voices rise, and the women wander off. The exception is the van dream-team, who have choreographed their hand signals like ground marshals parking an A380. BYO popcorn.
Emptying the caravan toilet isn't a big deal (for him)
To the uninitiated, the toilet cassette is a removable waste-holding tank that needs emptying every few days. Taking the contents to the dump point is the one job that I, along with most women I know, refuse to do (we call it the Walk of Shame). Fortunately, most men hold no such aversion. Rather, they wheel their toilet cassettes through the park with the breezy confidence of someone pulling hand luggage through a terminal. If there are others waiting, they'll enjoy a good old chinwag about tow ball weights, petrol prices and the likelihood of rain, all without interruption – or eye rolls – from their partners.
Duct tape is currency
Leaky hoses, torn canvas, ripped sneakers – you name it, my MacGyver-of-a-husband has patched them all with nothing more than duct tape. So versatile is this tacky tape that NASA even used it to make running repairs on the Apollo 13 mission. Keep a few spares, but if you run out, know your neighbour will happily trade a roll for a cold beer. The consensus is that if it can't be fixed with duct tape, you're in trouble.
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