‘She feels like the sister I never had': Telegraph writers on International Friendship Day
Whether providing company at lunch or a sympathetic ear to gossip with over coffee, health experts are unanimous on both the mental and physical benefits to the body of long-term friendships.
Zoe Jane Hindle, a functional wellness practitioner and creator of the hormone health course Busy Gal says: 'Oxytocin is the hormone that is released in response to physical touch, eye contact, emotional connection and building trust.'
'Oxytocin helps to reduce cortisol as it calms the signalling between the brain and the adrenals, it also helps regulate emotional resilience, supports progesterone production and improves sleep quality.'
Nicky Keay, a hormone health expert, says that good health requires focus in three different areas: physical, mental and social.
'See friendship as a long-term investment – you should naturally lean on these friendships as you get older,' she says.
Do you have a long-term friendship that has helped you through difficult times? Someone you can always rely on to brighten your day or talk about the news? Let us know in the comments.
Lisa and Mick
If you had told me 36 years ago that one day I would be 'in charge' of Mick Brown, I'd have been dumbfounded. I pitched up at the offices of a yet-to-be-launched paper in 1989 with ideas about being a news journalist formed from watching films.
Mick was my editor and was blessed with equal amounts of brilliance, patience and charisma – coming to work was a joy, I learnt so much from him and I was heartbroken when it came to an end 18 months later.
But reading Mick's work over the years, and seeing him from time to time, crystallised just what a fantastic fella he continues to be… and it was with utter delight that I saw him sitting at a desk when I arrived at The Telegraph a few years ago.
Yes, in theory I'm his boss but when we sit down to discuss a feature, it's usually over lunch at the local greasy spoon with diversions into shared loves such as Steely Dan tunes, Margaret Howell knitwear and Sardinian holidays.
He still makes coming to work a joy.
In 1989 I was editing the features and review section of a start-up newspaper called The Sunday Correspondent.
Staffing the section from scratch, and keen to find somebody attuned to a young and female audience, I interviewed a 24-year-old journalist who had been working on Elle magazine, and who arrived for the interview on a motorbike, dressed in black leathers, helmet under her arm. Quick, clever, and keen, she got the job.
She is now what is described as my line-manager – a title that makes it sound as if we both work for the railways. I just call her my boss.
Journalism is a carousel. Friends and colleagues come and go in your life, and often come back again. I was very happy when Lisa came back. We have much the same taste in music, films and books, and we are both passionate about journalism.
She is delightful company – well, most of the time anyway – and how many people can say that about their boss? In short, we are on the same page which is a very good thing for two journalists to be.
Dom and Francis
Francis and I were thrown together by our wonderful pal David Knowles as co-hosts of The Telegraph's podcast Ukraine: The Latest, which has gone out every weekday since the start of Russia's full-scale invasion of Ukraine on February 24, 2022.
We tragically lost David a year ago, but Francis and I have carried on everyday from London, Ukraine and around the world, reporting the news, explaining the context and interviewing guests including presidents, military chiefs, Ukrainian rock stars, young chess prodigies in war-torn Odesa, and everyone in between.
Throughout, and despite his very dodgy fashion choices, I have breathed a little easier when I knew Francis was with me, secure in the knowledge that today's broadcast would be just as good as yesterday's, and just as good as David would have produced.
Despite not knowing the difference between a T-72 tank and a BMP-3 infantry fighting vehicle (and, incredibly, showing not the slightest desire to have me teach him), I have come to accept Francis's idiosyncrasies with criticism that never goes beyond that which is absolutely necessary.
After three years, though, I grudgingly accept that I would be lost without his steady hand, deep sense of duty and resolute spirit.
I am 20 years older than Francis, but we both wish we could be the other's age and, importantly, act accordingly. I think that's why our friendship works. But he's really got to do something about those clothes.
It's scary to admit, but over the past 1,200 days – roughly the length of your average medieval siege – I've spent more time with Dom Nicholls than anyone else in my life. Barely a day has passed without at least one message exchanged, and that's before you even factor in our time in recording studios, war zones, and international airports serving questionable coffee.
And yet, somehow – despite routinely mocking each other's fashion choices (Dom's wardrobe appears to be inspired by a midlife crisis at a beach bar) – we've never once had a proper argument. The closest I came was in Kharkiv last year. After a night of little sleep as a result of air raids, I went to meet Dom at the station.
It was late, packed, and I must have run up and down the place six times like some kind of stressed-out courier pigeon. When I finally found him, he looked as relaxed as if he'd just stepped off a cruise. I, meanwhile, was drenched in sweat and slightly feral. 'Why didn't you pick up your phone?' I demanded. 'I knew you'd find me,' he replied – which was, annoyingly, the nicest thing one friend can say to another.
To an outsider, we must seem like a mismatched pair. I favour suits and ties; Dom dresses like he's heading to a barbecue. This is especially baffling given he spent 25 years in uniform – you'd think he'd have a lingering fondness for a tailored jacket. But beneath the aesthetic chaos, we share much: a sense of humour, of responsibility, and a belief that the work matters.
At events, people sometimes lean in like they're about to reveal a state secret and whisper, 'Do you two actually get along?' I always say: we couldn't do this every day if we didn't. Our reporting, while a great privilege, is often emotionally exhausting – but Dom believes, as I do, that there is always hope, even in the darkest times.
When we lost David, it was Dom who called to tell me. I can only imagine how hard that was for him – but I genuinely can't think of anyone I'd rather have heard it from.
Samuel Johnson once wrote, 'Every man thinks meanly of himself for not having been a soldier.' I know the feeling. But I count myself incredibly lucky to work so closely with one – even if I still think he shouldn't be afraid to wear a tie now and then.
Laura and Rachel
While far beyond cliché by this point, the siren call for all Gen Z and Millennial women by Dolly Alderton still rings true. Her musing that 'Almost everything I know about love I have learnt from my long-term female friendships' is more than apt when it comes to Laura.
At the beginning of May 2023 I whipped around to an American accent coming from another desk; hardly a common occurrence in Tele Towers. That first coffee run turned into daily lunches and in the two years that have followed we have become almost inseparable.
Laura came from The Times, and the US before that where she had both worked and studied. Her charming accent, a unique hybrid between the States and Leeds, has quickly become a fixture of the newsroom, bringing calm to even the most stressful of breaking news days.
In the years that followed, rarely a week a has passed without at least two evenings out together at various work events or just for fun. Laura has a calm sense of self that can riddle the most complex of professional or personal trials with sagacity. Expertly deploying her specialised state-side meets British stiff-upper-lip blend in knowing exactly when emotion is, and more importantly, isn't needed,
Even during Laura's secondment to Washington DC where she covered the US Election, stressful work schedules and a five-hour time difference proved no match for our daily 20-minute voice notes and FaceTimes. I even crossed the pond for the first time to visit her last December.
They say of modern day friendships, that presence is a luxury. In a world of instant messages often taking president over more meaningful moments, imagine how rich I feel to spend every day together, just a few desks apart.
We may both be only children, but she truly feels like the wiser, wittier sister I never had.
Gordon and Christopher
They say friendships forged in battle are often stronger than the bond between siblings, and you don't have to have fought in a war to know exactly how that feels.
Journalism, like the Armed Forces, is a career in which adversity has to be overcome on a daily basis, as the troops (reporters) fend off the twin threats of the enemy (other news organisations) and your superiors. In both cases, it's a great way to find out who your real friends are.
For nearly two decades, the person who has perhaps best fitted that description in my life is Chris Hope, with whom I have shared office space for most of my Telegraph career, both at HQ and in our cramped, stifling outpost in Parliament, reporting on everything from the MPs expenses scandal to general elections.
Chris is one of those people who will always have your back both professionally and personally. Equally importantly, he also sees the funny side (and very often the sheer absurdity) of any situation and laughter is a given when Chris is around, usually at his own expense.
He is now doing brilliantly as GB News's political editor, having left The Telegraph to make the switch into broadcasting, but few days go by without us contacting each other for a laugh or a gossip about what our colleagues or acquaintances have been up to. Our wives have become friends too.
Another thing that's a given with Chris is trust. We can discuss anything without having to worry about it being repeated. A true friend is a safe space, and Chris is both to me. It's just a shame he supports Liverpool.
Millie and Shauna
We met each other at work and from the very beginning there was something easy about our connection. We only spent a short amount of time together on the same desk, but what started as a professional relationship quickly turned into something much more meaningful.
We started spending more time together outside of work – grabbing coffee, venting about difficult days and becoming each other's sounding board for both personal and professional challenges. Our conversations flowed effortlessly, from work deadlines to deeper topics like family, relationships and future goals.
Earlier this year, we took a leap and moved in together (along with our friend Eleanor). People might assume it would be too much to see each other every day both at work and at home, but for us, living with each other has been a continuation of the comfort we found in each other's company. In fact, we even walk home from the office together when we can.
We hang out most evenings, binge-watching Girls or Sex in the City while talking through our days. On weekends, we're often out together at parties, catching up with friends, or impulse buying more table runners and vases for our beautiful new home.
What makes this friendship special is the balance we've found. We support each other without judgement, challenge each other to grow and celebrate each other's wins – big or small. It's rare to find someone who understands both the demands of your job and the nuances of your personal life and we feel lucky to have found that in each other.
Our friendship is a reminder that some of the best relationships begin in the most ordinary places and can evolve into something truly valuable and lasting.
Broaden your horizons with award-winning British journalism. Try The Telegraph free for 1 month with unlimited access to our award-winning website, exclusive app, money-saving offers and more.
Solve the daily Crossword
Hashtags
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Yahoo
an hour ago
- Yahoo
What makes the Mediterranean diet so healthy?
The Mediterranean diet has long been considered one of the healthiest dietary options for a long life. But, why is that the case? Researchers say the answer lies both in the nutritious value of the meals and in their anti-inflammatory ingredients, such as dark leafy greens and olive oil. 'The Mediterranean diet is probably one tool to keep your underlying systems in harmony with each other, and that may make you less vulnerable,' Dr. Annie Moore, a University of Colorado School of Medicine internal medicine specialist, said in a statement. Eating anti-inflammatory foods — including nuts, tomatoes, and salmon — is important to help reduce inflammation. Inflammation, which is our immune system's natural response to invaders, can be harmful when it persists. Chronic inflammation has been linked to heart disease, respiratory illness, autoimmune disease, arthritis, dementia, cancer, and other conditions, according to the Cleveland Clinic. Other foods have been tied to chronic inflammation, including those with high-fat and sugar content. "Many experimental studies have shown that components of foods or beverages may have anti-inflammatory effects," Dr. Frank Hu, a professor of nutrition and epidemiology at the Harvard School of Public Health, said. So, the next time you make a meal, what do you choose to stay Mediterranean diet-compliant? If you're choosing a protein, make it fishy. Oily fish including salmon, mackerel, and sardines are rich in omega-3 fats, which have been shown to exhibit anti-inflammatory properties. Maybe also reach for fish oil, but know that there's no convincing evidence to recommend them, according to Harvard Women's Health Watch. 'Fish oil contains omega-3 fatty acids, which are part of a healthy diet that is associated with lower levels of inflammation. Your body can't manufacture omega-3 fatty acids —eicosapentaenoic acid, docosahexaenoic acid, and alpha-linolenic acid — so it's important to get them through your diet,' Harvard Health said. Experts say to cook that fish in extra-virgin olive oil, which contains anti-oxidants that fight inflammation. One is known as oleocanthal, which 'has been shown to work like ibuprofen,' according to Harvard Health. Olive oil can help fight arthritis symptoms throughout the body, according to the Arthritis Foundation. 'Antioxidants are almost like a shield around your cells, like a blanket around them to protect them from oxidative damage,' registered dietitian Julia Zumpano explained to the Cleveland Clinic. But, it's not just olive oil that's a great source of antioxidants. As a side, reach for the greens and the beans, David Dunaief, an internist in New York, told The Washington Post. 'Dark, leafy green vegetables may lower inflammation by increasing antioxidant levels,' he said. There are many versions of a Mediterranean diet. The MIND diet, or 'Mediterranean-DASH Intervention for Neurodegenerative Delay' diet, targets the health of the aging brain with its selection. Whereas the DASH diet, or 'Dietary Approaches to Stop Hypertension' eating plan, is focused on fighting high blood pressure. Make sure to avoid ultraprocessed foods, including soda, smoked meat, chips, white bread, and others that are high in saturated fats, sodium, and sugar. Recent research has tied eating ultraprocessed food to an increased risk of lung cancer. Instead, grab a whole wheat roll, put nuts and tomatoes in a salad, and eat blueberries and other fruit for — or, at least, with — your dessert. Cherries are in season! 'Sometimes it's easier to add healthy foods than taking other foods away,' Moore said.
Gizmodo
2 hours ago
- Gizmodo
Diet Swap Study Reveals How Ultra-Processed Foods Can Derail Weight Loss
In case you needed more incentive to cut down on ultra-processed foods, a new diet swap study out today reveals that people experienced greater weight loss while eating minimally processed foods than they did when they ate a nutritionally similar, ultra-processed diet. In a six-month trial led by scientists at University College London, study participants were assigned one of the two diet regimes to follow for eight weeks, and then took a four week break before swapping to the other diet for another eight weeks. Participants lost more weight while eating the minimally processed diet than the ultra-processed one; they also shed more unhealthy fat. The findings, published Monday in Nature Medicine, suggest that, among other things, ultra-processed diets are especially good at stoking people's food cravings, the researchers said. Ultra-Processed Foods Have Disturbing Health Effects, Large Review Finds Although there is some debate over what constitutes an ultra-processed food, there are generally considered products or ingredients that have gone through high levels of industrialized processing, like breakfast sausages, candy, or sodas. There is a growing mountain of evidence that suggests a diet rich in ultra-processed foods is less healthy overall than a diet made up of mostly whole foods, and that ultra-processed foods may raise the risk of certain diseases. Most of this research, however, only shows a correlation between ultra-processed diets and poorer health outcomes, and not a direct cause-and-effect link. Clinical trials can provide stronger evidence, but they're notoriously difficult to do in the world of nutrition science for many reasons, particularly funding, the researchers said. A New Diet Study Confirms Your Worst Suspicions About Ultra-Processed Foods The results highlight the importance of following government dietary guidelines, Dicken said. But the study also indicates that people who want to lose weight may see the most benefit from sticking to minimally processed foods. As to why the ultra-processed foods are worse for dieting, the researchers have their educated guesses. Ultra-processed foods tend to have more appealing textures and artificially boosted flavors, which often means they are softer or easier to eat, and tastier. Their appearance and packaging might also make them more visually appealing to potential customers. Interestingly, the volunteers in this study reported that both diets were equally satisfying to eat on average, but they also reported having better control over their cravings while on the minimally processed diet. Dicken noted that the researchers weren't able to directly test these potential explanations in this trial, though, so more research is needed to know for sure. The team has already launched their next study, which is testing out a behavioral support program to reduce people's intake of ultra-processed foods. But Dicken cautioned that it will take widespread societal shifts, not individual scolding, to change our collective diets for the better.
CNN
3 hours ago
- CNN
Eating minimally processed meals doubles weight loss even when ultraprocessed foods are healthy, study finds
People in the United Kingdom lost twice as much weight eating meals typically made at home than they did when eating store-bought ultraprocessed food considered healthy, the latest research has found. 'This new study shows that even when an ultraprocessed diet meets nutritional guidelines, people will still lose more weight eating a minimally processed diet,' said coauthor Dr. Kevin Hall, a former senior investigator at the US National Institutes of Health who has conducted some of the world's only controlled clinical trials on ultraprocessed foods. 'This (study) is the largest and longest randomized controlled clinical trial of ultraprocessed foods to date,' Hall added. Hall's past research sequestered healthy volunteers inside a clinic for a month at a time, measuring the impact of ultraprocessed food on their weight, body fat and various biomarkers of health. In a 2019 study, he found people in the United States ate about 500 calories more each day and gained weight when on an ultraprocessed diet than when eating a minimally processed diet matched by calories and nutrients. The weight loss from minimally processed food in the new study was modest — only 2% of the person's baseline weight, said study first author Samuel Dicken, a research fellow at the department of behavioral science and health and the Centre for Obesity Research at University College London. 'Though a 2% reduction may not seem very big, that is only over eight weeks and without people trying to actively reduce their (food) intake,' Dicken said in a statement. 'If we scaled these results up over the course of a year, we'd expect to see a 13% weight reduction in men and a 9% reduction in women.' Men typically have more lean muscle mass than women, which along with testosterone often gives them a quicker boost over women when it comes to weight loss, experts say. The study, published Monday in the journal Nature Medicine, provided free ultraprocessed or minimally processed meals and snacks to 55 overweight people in the UK for a total of eight weeks. After a short break, the groups switched to the opposite diet for another eight weeks. Study participants were told to eat as much or as little of the 4,000 daily calories as they liked and record their consumption in a diary. By the end of the study, 50 people had spent eight weeks on both diets. While the number of participants may seem small at first glance, providing 16 weeks of food and implementing randomized controlled clinical trials can be costly. For the first eight weeks, 28 people received daily deliveries of minimally processed meals and snacks, such as overnight oats and homemade spaghetti Bolognese. Minimally processed foods, such as fruits, vegetables, meat, milk and eggs, are typically cooked from their natural state, according to NOVA, a recognized system of categorizing foods by their level of processing. Concurrently, another 27 people received a daily delivery of ultraprocessed foods — such as ready-to-eat breakfast bars or heat-and-eat lasagna — for eight weeks. Ultraprocessed foods, or UPFs, contain additives never or rarely used in kitchens and often undergo extensive industrial processing, according to the NOVA classification system. Because ultraprocessed foods are typically high in calories, added sugar, sodium, and saturated fat and low in fiber, they have been linked to weight gain and obesity and the development of chronic conditions including cancer, cardiovascular disease, type 2 diabetes and depression. Such foods may even shorten life. Researchers in this study, however, did something unusual, said Christopher Gardner, Rehnborg Farquhar Professor of Medicine at Stanford University in California who directs the Stanford Prevention Research Center's Nutrition Studies Research Group. 'They tried to make a healthy ultraprocessed diet by picking ultraprocessed foods with the recommended number of fruits, veggies and fiber and lower levels of salt, sugar and saturated fats,' said Gardner, who was not involved in the study. Both the ultraprocessed and the minimally processed meals had to meet the nutritional requirements of the Eatwell Guide, the UK's official government guidance on how to eat a healthy, balanced diet. The United States has similar dietary guidelines, which are used to set federal nutritional standards. 'This is a very solid study, matching dietary interventions for nutrients and food group distribution, while varying only the contribution of ultra-processed foods,' said Dr. David Katz, a specialist in preventive and lifestyle medicine, in an email. Katz, who was not involved in the study, is the founder of the nonprofit True Health Initiative, a global coalition of experts dedicated to evidence-based lifestyle medicine. The study's goal was weight loss, which often comes with improved cardiovascular readings, such as lower blood pressure, cholesterol and blood sugar levels. That happened, but in rather odd and surprising ways, said Marion Nestle, the Paulette Goddard professor emerita of nutrition, food studies and public health at New York University, who was asked to write an editorial to be published with the study. Instead of gaining weight, people on the ultraprocessed diet chose to eat 120 fewer calories a day, thus losing a small amount of weight. People on the minimally processed diet, however, ate 290 fewer calories a day, thus losing even more weight and some body fat as well. 'One possible explanation is that (people on the minimally processed diet) did not like the 'healthy' meals as much as their usual diets,' Nestle, who was not involved in the research, wrote in the editorial. 'They deemed the minimally processed diet less tasty,' Nestle said. 'That diet emphasized 'real' fresh foods, whereas the ultra-processed diet featured commercially packaged 'healthy' ultra-processed food products such as fruit, nut, and protein bars; sandwiches and meals; drinking yoghurts, and plant-based milks.' Less than 1% of people in the UK follow all of the government's nutritional recommendations, according to the study, often choosing ultraprocessed foods as the basis of their normal daily intake. In the US, nearly 60% of an adult's calorie consumption is from ultraprocessed foods. 'People in this study were overweight or obese and were already eating a diet high in all kinds of ultraprocessed foods,' Gardner said. 'So the ultraprocessed diet in the study was healthier than their typical normal diet. Isn't that an odd twist?' People on the minimally processed diet had lower levels of triglycerides, a type of fat in the blood linked to an increased risk of heart disease and stroke, but other markers of heart health didn't vary much between the two diets, according to the study. There was one notable exception: low-density lipoprotein, or LDL, known as 'bad' cholesterol because it can build up in arteries and create blockages to the heart. 'Surprisingly, LDL cholesterol was reduced more on the ultra-processed diet,' said dietitian Dimitrios Koutoukidis, an associate professor of diet, obesity and behavioral sciences at the University of Oxford, who was not involved in the study. 'This might imply that processing is not as important for heart health if the foods already meet the standard UK healthy eating guidance,' Koutoukidis said in a statement. 'Further research is needed to better understand this.' According to Hall, the results fit quite nicely with preliminary results from his current study that is still underway. In that research, Hall and his team measured the impact of four configurations of ultraprocessed foods on the health of 36 volunteers. Each lived for a month in the Metabolic Clinical Research Unit of the National Institutes of Health Clinical Center in Bethesda, Maryland. 'When you modify an ultraprocessed diet to have lower energy (calorie) density and fewer highly palatable foods, you can offset some of the effects of ultraprocessed foods in causing excess calorie intake and weight gain,' Hall said. In other words, choose healthier foods regardless of the levels of processing. 'People don't eat the best ultraprocessed foods, they eat the worst ones, so the take home here is to follow the national guidelines for nutrient quality,' Gardner said. 'Read your nutrient label and choose foods that are low in salt, fat, sugar and calories and high in fiber, and avoid foods with too many additives with unpronounceable names. That's the key to a healthier diet.'
