‘Our family is no threat to another family': first same-sex couple to marry in Ireland say marriage equality ‘isn't finished'
first same-sex couple to legally marry
in Ireland. They recently celebrated their daughter's first birthday, having fulfilled their long-time dream of starting a family.
Ten years ago today Gollogly and Dowling walked down the streets of Dublin, hand in hand, knowing they were now living in the first country to
approve same-sex marriage by popular vote.
'We didn't feel uncomfortable for once in public being affectionate with one another. We didn't have to hide it and it was celebrated that day,' says Dowling, remembering the joy they felt on that day which he describes as 'like Italia '90 for the gays'.
'Marriage equality isn't finished for us,' says Gollogly, a decade later. Speaking about their journey towards parenthood, Gollogly and Dowling identify some of the challenges faced by Irish couples 'both gay and straight' who want to have children.
READ MORE
'Surrogacy and new modern forms of having families are a part of Irish society and all of us are united in needing to meet those needs for the children,' says Dowling. 'The best needs of the child is sacrosanct and really important. Our family is no threat to another family.'
[
'I burst out crying on referendum results day. I realised how exhausted and scared I had been'
Opens in new window
]
Not long after the night they first met in The George pub, 22 years ago, the couple discussed having children.
'We were about a month together, in the first flights of love and Cormac turned to me and said 'The greatest thanks we can give the universe for the love we share is to have a child and pass that on'. So we always wanted to have a child.
'It took time to get there. We went to the US and did surrogacy in America. We had a very positive experience, thankfully, during the Biden administration.'
Their daughter, Kate Rose Dowling Gollogly, is now 17 months old. She is named after her grandmothers: Gollogly's mother Rosemary and Dowling's mother Kate. They live together in a south Dublin suburb, Gollogly working as a lawyer and Dowling in finance.
'Obviously one of us isn't recognised as a parent. The surrogate is essentially Kate's mother on her birth cert,' says Dowling, something they both want to see Irish legislation 'catch up with'.
'In America it's all very clear,' adds Gollogly. 'It's Ireland that has to catch up with what is the legal reality for where Kate is born and where this all happened. The majority of surrogacy families are straight families and where it might be seen by some as a gay issue, we're in the minority,' Gollogly adds.
[
Almost 6,000 same-sex couples have wed in 10 years since marriage equality referendum
Opens in new window
]
They point to Katherine Zappone and Ann Louise Gilligan's State case for marriage equality – the legal battle for their Canadian marriage to be recognised in Ireland was a significant catalyst for the marriage equality campaign here. 'That was their point: that Ireland needs to catch up legally with the rest of the world.'
As well as advocating for LGBTQ+ parental rights, Gollogly and Dowling express concern for the 'intolerance and hate' now directed at transgender people.
'I feel there's a whole lift-and-drop of that kind of intolerance and hate in some ways on to the trans community,' says Dowling, pointing to the recent
UK court ruling on gender recognition
.
'It's very sad to see it. It's an easy poke at something that they don't want to understand or they don't want to try to understand ... It's a backdoor into discrimination again. It was unnecessary, in my opinion.
'The fight doesn't stop. People need to remember that we need to be visible and we need to be out there marching.'
Hashtags
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Extra.ie
2 hours ago
- Extra.ie
Fundraiser launched for bust of first Irish soldier to receive Military Medal for Gallantry
A fundraiser has been launched with the hopes of having a bust erected of the first Irish soldier to receive the Military Medal for Gallantry in the history of the state. The fundraiser has been created by the Irish United Nations Veterans Association with the aim of commemorating the brave actions of Anthony Browne, as well as other members of the ill-fated Congo Niemba Ambush patrol. The event saw nine Irish soldiers lose their lives, with Trooper Browne helping many of his squad escape before being killed himself, earning him the honour of the Military Medal for Gallantry (MMG) which is the equivalent of the British Victoria Cross — the first soldier of the Irish Defence Forces to receive such an honour. Anthony Browne. Pic: Supplied In 1960, Dubliner Browne was deployed to the Belgium Congo as a UN Peacekeeper aged just 19, and his heroic actions have led the UN vets to try and create a bust of Anthony in Dublin, using it as a place to visit, and talk about the brave Irish soldiers that have represented the country. Michael Buggy, who created the page, shared more of the Rialto native's story: 'On November 8, 1960 he was a member of an 11 strong reconnaissance patrol commanded by Lt Kevin Gleeson a Carlow man. During this patrol they were ambushed by Baluba Tribesmen over 100 strong. The 1962 funeral in Dublin of trooper Anthony Browne, one of the victims of the Niemba ambush. Pic: Supplied 'Nine members of the patrol lost their lives in the ambush, two members miraculously survived, eight bodies were recovered from the ambush scene and the two survivors were removed for medical care. 'Trooper Browne's body was not recovered until two years later from an unmarked grave in the bush, on information received from locals. The scene at the bridge shortly before the first bodies were recovered after the Battle of Niemba in The Congo in November 1960. Pic: Supplied 'One of the survivors in his subsequent report attributed his survival to the action taken by Anthony Browne, [and hence he] was awarded posthumously, the Military Medal of Honour (With, Distinction) in recognition of his exceptional bravery during the Niemba Ambush. All nine were also awarded the Military Star posthumously.' The group has set a target of €20,000, with Buggy adding: 'Your donation will help us fund a bust, not only to his memory, but also to all the other members of that ill-fated Congo Niemba Ambush patrol in 1960 which is still etched on the memory of all Military Personnel and the Thousands of mourners that lined O'Connell St, Dublin, on the return home of their bodies for Internment.'
Irish Times
6 hours ago
- Irish Times
Master brewer who died in Cork house fire remembered as ‘gentle giant with big heart'
A master brewer who died in a house fire in Cork city last week knew the importance of time and 'put more into the life of others than he took out,' his requiem Mass has heard. Peter Lyall, who was remembered as a 'gentle giant with a big heart,' died when a fire broke out at his home in Hollyhill in the early hours of July 21st. The 57-year-old, who worked at the Franciscan Well brewery in Cork for over two decades, was pronounced dead at the scene. His beloved dog Charlie also died. His partner Anna Neville managed to get out of the property and was transferred to hospital. Fr Sean O'Sullivan told mourners at St Mary's on the Hill Church, in Knocknaheeny on Monday that Mr Lyall learned a lot about life from the brewing process which he said involves 'choosing the finest ingredients', blending them in the right proportions and then giving them the time to ferment. READ MORE 'Family, friendship, his passion for work, his love of basketball and coaching, his love of fun and a bit of craic – they were the ingredients of his life he blended them into something that, like his beer, will last long beyond them.' Mr Lyall had also been a coach at Fr Mathew's Basketball club in the city. Shane Long, founder of The Franciscan Well bar and brewery, said Mr Lyall was a modest man. He said Mr Lyall was 'instrumental in producing a beer called Sunbeam' and that he never took any credit for it. 'And when everybody else is gone from here, his beer will still be there, a lasting memory for the amazing man he was.' He also said Mr Lyall met Ms Neville, 'the love of his life', over three decades ago and adored her, their children and grandchildren. Mr Lyall's grandson Paul said he had an infectious laugh which could be 'heard across a room and maybe even through the walls'. Chanice and Kia said he was a 'magical' grandfather who made them feel safe and loved and always told them how proud he was of them. Mr Lyall is survived by his partner Ms Neville, his daughters Sarah and Johann, his five siblings, grandchildren, relatives, neighbours and friends.
Irish Times
14 hours ago
- Irish Times
Dispute over elderly Wexford man's will leaving estate to 38 nieces and nephews should be decided in Circuit Court, judge rules
A dispute over the estate of a deceased Co Wexford man whose will left it to his 38 nieces and nephews is not appropriate for hearing in the High Court and should be heard in the Circuit Court, a judge has ruled. The dispute concerns the estate, including his home at Iskabeg, the Ballagh, Enniscorthy, of Michael Redmond (98), a widower with no children who died in a nursing home in December 2021. In a will dated June 22nd, 2015, Mr Redmond left his estate to his nieces and nephews and there are 38 beneficiaries, aged between 50 and 79, the judge said. In late 2022, the estate executors issued proceedings against the deceased's nephew, Michael Corrigan (76), and Mr Corrigan's daughter, Shinéad , seeking possession of the farmhouse property. The executors say the house was previously valued at €230,000, but this may have increased. READ MORE The defendants issued a defence and also counterclaimed for orders, including for specific performance of an alleged agreement by Mr Redmond the property would be left to Mr Corrigan, and damages of €60,000. In late 2023, Mr Corrigan issued separate High Court proceedings against the executors, seeking orders including payment of €286,000 quantum merit damages, which are damages for provision of goods or services without a formal contract. Mr Corrigan, who is among the beneficiaries of his uncle's will, claims Mr Redmond, his godfather, promised him the farmhouse property and, on foot of that, he had left Achill Island and has lived in it since 2017. He claims he has carried out extensive renovation and upkeep works to the house and curtilage and is the rightful owner. In her recently published High Court judgment, granting an application by the executors to have the dispute decided in the Circuit Court rather than the High Court, Ms Justice Cahill said the orders sought in the High Court claim are almost identical to those sought in the counterclaim to the Circuit Court case. The 'only noticeable' difference is between the sums of damages claimed, she said. There was 'no justification' stated in the court papers for this 'significant' jump on the amount of damages, she said. However, because the executors had consented to the Circuit Court having 'unlimited monetary jurisdiction' in a claim of the type advanced in the existing proceedings in that court, the monetary difference in both claims was not a material matter. For those reasons, and to avoid unnecessary and undesirable multiplicity of proceedings seeing substantially the same orders, and dealing with the same claims and the same property, she was satisfied it was appropriate to remit the High Court proceedings to Wexford Circuit Court. The imperative must be to have all disputes related to the estate resolved so it can be administered without further undue delay or unnecessary costs incurred, she said. Earlier in her decision, the judge noted Mr Corrigan had not attended the hearing of the executors' application. Ms Corrigan did attend but did not identify any 'exceptional circumstances' to justify her attempts to advocate for her father. The judge had ruled there was no basis established for adjourning the hearing of the application and Ms Corrigan had no right to make submissions to the court on the matter. The executors, the judge noted, refuted allegations, including of wrongdoing, made against them by Ms Corrigan in an affidavit which related mainly to the merits of the underlying dispute.
