Monsoon rains trigger deadly flash floods in northern Pakistan
Hashtags
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
Yahoo
16 minutes ago
- Yahoo
What is a 'lesbian bottom?' LGBTQ+ sex experts explain & give tips for how to do it right
The terms 'bottom' and 'top' have been around since the gay leather scene got it's start in the '50s, but while most people know what it means when you're talking about gay sex — terms to differentiate between someone who likes to be penetrated during sex and the one who wants to penetrate — what is a 'lesbian bottom?' The terms top and bottom may have been coined by and for gay men, but the broader queer community and especially sapphics have taken to using the terms to describe sexual dynamics too. Even the straights have tried to co-opt the terms, though they consistently get it wrong and conflate 'top' and 'bottom' with 'dominant' and 'submissive.' They clearly have never met a bossy bottom, power bottom, or service top. But it can get complicated in sapphic relationships because queer women are more likely to both give and receive sexual pleasure in a relationship, unless they are a stone top or a pillow princess. And while being a 'bottom' usually refers to a preference in positions, it can also be shorthand for a sexual dynamic — especially in sapphic relationships. So what exactly is a "lesbian bottom?" To figure it all out, we talked to LGBTQ+ sex and relationship experts to find out what a lesbian bottom really is, and some tips and tricks for being the best lesbian bottom around. What is a lesbian bottom? Iryna Kalamurza/Shuttestock Ok, so you know what gay men mean when they say they're a bottom, but what is a 'lesbian bottom?' 'When sapphics or lesbians talk about being a 'bottom,' they're typically referring to a partner who enjoys receiving touch, sensation, or stimulation during sex — whether that's physical or emotional,' Emily Lambert Robins, a licensed clinical social worker and AASECT-certified sex therapist, tells PRIDE. 'It's less about a rigid role and more about a preference for surrender, receptivity, and being attuned to what feels good when letting someone else take the lead.' These terms seem simpler when a dick is in play, and penetration is usually on the sexual menu, but for sapphics, it can look a little different. 'For some, that can look like being on the receiving end of oral sex, strap play, or sensual touch. For others, it might be more about an emotional dynamic rooted in trust, vulnerability, and responsiveness,' Robins continues. Just like some people try to peg bottoms as always being submissive and tops as always dominant, people tend to pigeonhole butch and femme lesbians into specific roles in the bedroom, but butch bottoms and femme tops do exist. 'What's important to note here is that these terms reflect identities that help people understand and communicate to others what they find fulfilling, pleasurable, or affirming,' explains Willow Sipling, an LGBT advocate, subject matter expert, and sociologist. Is it all about positions? Sexual positions are just part of the picture. Lesbian tops are more likely to be the one strapping, or giving oral sex, but that's not all the term encompasses. 'While physical positions may play a role, being a bottom often speaks to a certain energetic position: one of openness, willingness, and connection,' Robins says. 'Some bottoms love being guided or 'done to,' while others express strong preferences and communicate boundaries clearly. It's a dance of power, trust, and pleasure that can look different depending on the relationship, mood, or moment. The key is how the experience makes someone feel, not how it looks from the outside.' According to Byrd, a certified sex educator who specializes in queerness from Sex Ed With Byrd, lesbian bottoms also want to relinquish control. 'Being a lesbian bottom isn't just about who's receiving or who's on the bottom physically,' they explain. 'Among lesbians and sapphics, bottoming often blends physicality, sensation, emotional dynamics, and power play, but it doesn't always include all of those at once. For some, it's a preference for receiving pleasure. For others, it's about being submissive in bed. And sometimes, it's just a playful label that helps describe a dynamic that's hard to name otherwise.' What makes a good lesbian bottom? A good lesbian bottom doesn't need to 'perform in a specific way,' Robins says, but should be 'present, communicative, and connected to their body' and be self aware enough to know 'what feels good and what doesn't,' is open to trying new things, expresses both boundaries sand desires clearly, and is responsive in bed so that your top can understand your desire by paying attention to your 'word, sounds, or movement.' Women, and femme presenting people, are socialized to be giving and helpful and so it can be difficult to set that social conditions aside be a little greedy about your own pleasure, but Byrd points out that being a good lesbian bottom means allowing yourself to 'receive, without guilt or pressure to perform.' Tips for improving your bottoming skills Roman Chazov/Shutterstock Play with power dynamics! For some lesbians and sapphics, bottoming and submission are connected. 'That can be explored through dirty talk, light restraints, or role play—always consensually,' Robins recommends. Don't wait for your partner to guess what feels good. Do some cool exploring if you need to before bringing a partner into the equation. Use your words! Sounds are great, but throw in a 'Yes, just like that,' 'slower,' or 'right there' so your top knows what feels good. This goes for if something hurts or is uncomfortable too. 'Explore sensation and pleasure, not just climax. You don't have to be goal-oriented to have a satisfying experience,' Byrd says. But what if it's your first time? Choose a sexual partner who respects you, your voice, and the pace you want to go at in bed. Bottoming requires a level of surrender that is easier if you trust your partner. Control your breathing to help with those pesky first-time nerves. 'Slow, intentional breathing can help calm nerves, increase sensation, and keep you present during intimacy. If you notice yourself tensing or holding your breath, try exhaling gently and resetting,' Robins recommends. Be honest about being new to this. It might help you rid yourself of some of your nerves to be up front about your level of experience, and it will help your partner create a better experience for you. Don't stress about perfection. This is your first time, and you're still learning, so try to focus more on exploration and playfulness than your performance. Make sure to spend some time on aftercare. Cuddling, laughing together, and talking through the experience can help you reconnect to your partner after the intense experience of bottoming for the first time. There can never be enough lube! Biggest mistake lesbian bottoms make Lesbian bottoms often make the mistake of performing, instead of focusing on their authentic reactions. It's also important not to push past or ignore your own bounders in an attempt to please your top, this will just lead to a bad experience for everyone involved. 'There's also a misconception that bottoming means being passive, but in reality, a connected and attuned bottom is fully engaged, just in a more receptive, responsive way. The most satisfying experiences come from knowing your limits, communicating clearly, and staying present with your own pleasure,' Robins explains. Sipling agrees, 'Many tops receive gratification from pleasing the bottom they are having an encounter with. For one to know what gets them going, and then to communicate this information with a top, can lead to a satisfying encounter for everyone.' What should you do if you get performance anxiety? Nicoleta Linescu./Shuttestock "It's completely normal to feel nervous stepping into a new role, especially when it involves vulnerability, trust, and intimacy,' Robins assures. 'Performance anxiety often shows up when we put pressure on ourselves to do things 'right,' but bottoming isn't about getting it perfect—it's about being present and attuned to your own experience.' If you're feeling nervous, talk to your partner about it, and be honest about what is freaking you out. If nerves are getting the best of you, try 'lying back and receiving a massage or kiss, and build from there,' instead of committing to using toys, penetrative sex, or exploring power dynamics on night one, Byrd says. 'Remind yourself that there's no script to follow. You get to define what bottoming means for you, at your own pace, with consent and care leading the way,' Robins agrees. Experts Cited: Emily Lambert Robins, a licensed clinical social worker and AASECT-certified sex therapist. Willow Sipling, an LGBT advocate, subject matter expert, and sociologist. Byrd, a certified sex educator who specializes in queerness from Sex Ed With Byrd. This article originally appeared on Pride: What is a 'lesbian bottom?' LGBTQ+ sex experts explain & give tips for how to do it right RELATED Common power bottom myths you probably believe 15 things all bottoms want tops to understand 17 simple tips for new bottoms you need to know, according to sex experts Solve the daily Crossword
CBS News
18 minutes ago
- CBS News
Frustrated tenants take action one month after Fort Worth apartment fire
One month after a six-alarm fire ripped through The Cooper Apartments in Fort Worth, tenants on Wednesday began taking matters into their own hands. Some residents entered the building and tossed belongings from a second-floor balcony. "It has been awfully frustrating," said Parker Perego. "I spent a month living in my parents' guestroom until I finally was able to find a new place in. Now that I have a new place, I don't have much of anything to put in it because it's all locked upstairs." Antonio Busby was one of at least two dozen tenants who protested outside the complex Wednesday, hoping to get answers from the Cooper management team about when they would be allowed to recover their belongings. The fire displaced more than 800 tenants, including Busby. "I feel like it's unacceptable," Busby said. "I feel like they're more concerned with their own liability before the well-being of their own tenants." Tenant Miriam Zarza is still missing her three pets that were inside the building when the fire happened. "Like I'm devastated. I don't want kids. These were my kids. These were my only babies. I've been having them since they were born. It's just a very heartbreaking experience," said Zarza. After 30 days of tenant demands, the management team finally provided some answers. In a statement to CBS News Texas, a spokesperson said that starting Monday, they will "begin reaching out to each resident individually to discuss next steps relative to their personal belongings." "That's very surprising. It seems like they're trying to make a good face for show rather than getting with the residents and letting them know what the timeline is," said Busby. "So, that's pretty shocking to me. I'm glad to hear it, but I wish it had come from the rental property and the Light Bulb Capital Group rather than coming from you right now." The Cooper management team added that, given the size of the community, the process will take time, but they will provide tenants with regular updates. While Zarza said the news of being allowed back inside her apartment provides some relief, it doesn't bring back her pets or ease the frustration she and others have felt over the past month. "I'll believe it when I see it. They've been saying that since the week of the fire, and we have not gotten updates," Zarza said. "So honestly, I'll just believe it when I see it."
Hamilton Spectator
an hour ago
- Hamilton Spectator
Texas A&M's collie mascot Reveille X has eye removed after glaucoma diagnosis
COLLEGE STATION, Texas (AP) — Reveille X, Texas A&M's border collie mascot, had her right eye surgically removed after veterinarians diagnosed her with glaucoma, the university's president said Wednesday. The collie — also known as the 'First Lady of Aggieland' — was diagnosed with glaucoma after experiencing discomfort and cloudiness in her right eye, President Mark A Welsh III said in a message on the school's website . The veterinary team removed the eye out of an abundance of caution after discovering signs of abnormal tissue, he said. 'I'm grateful to report that Miss Rev has come through the surgery successfully, has been discharged and is resting comfortably,' Welsh said. Texas A&M's Reveille mascot dates back to 1931, when a group of cadets found an injured dog and sneaked her on to campus. The dog barked when buglers played morning reveille, earning her the Reveille name. Reveille X took over as the latest iteration of the mascot in 2021. A souped-up golf cart known as 'Rev Force One' helps transport the collie across campus. Welsh said Reveille will take a brief hiatus from engagements as she recovers. 'According to her veterinary team, we can expect Miss Rev to be back to enjoying all her favorite activities — cruising on Rev Force One, attending classes, cheering on the Aggies and keeping our campus squirrels in line — this fall,' he said.
