25 Target Must-Haves For Busy Parents
A positively ingenious set of Infantino wrist rattles that'll save you from picking up that rattle yet again for your baby who hasn't *grasped* grasping yet. Just attach the rattles around the wrist or the ankles like a bracelet and let your baby discover the magic of their rattling hands and feet while you take that well-earned deep breath.
Promising review: "Super cute multi-functional baby toy with soft colors and teething accessories." —Brittany bPrice: $6.99 for two rattles
A lightweight and sturdy step stool that is 1,000 times better than lifting your kid to help them wash their hands. Unlike wooden ones, this step won't hurt them if they trip onto it, and it's light enough to move it around when they get older — saving you time and energy.
I have this stool and love it. When my oldest started standing independently, I got a decorative, oh-so-cute wooden one. I underestimated how clumsy toddlers are and how often they fall. She'd trip over her feet in the bathroom and get a huge bruise or scrape herself on my adorable footstool. Finally, I said "NEVER AGAIN" and bought this one. What was I waiting for?? This one is higher, lighter, and easier to clean and I do not miss the princess ballerina footstool. Plus, my kids easily grab it when they need to reach something, and I only need to involve myself if I hear a crash. Glorious. Promising review: "My 3-year-old uses this stepping stool constantly. It's great for when he wants to wash his hands, get something from the fridge, turn on/off the light switch, or use the toilet. It's very handy." —Love FPPrice: $15
And a pair of Munchkin faucet extenders to help your toddler feel a taste of independence and help save your hands from quadrupling the washing. These sink extenders help your little one easily reach the water without needing to be hoisted up like a sack of potatoes.
BuzzFeed editor and mom-of-two Heather Braga has this for her 3-year-old. She said, "We're working on potty training my toddler, which comes with the added routine of constant handwashing. He's itching to be independent in all ways (yay) so I knew it was time to add these to my cart. They slip over the two very different faucets in my bathrooms and have truly made it easier than ever for my son to wash his hands."Promising review: "I have two toddlers who are potty training. This has been a wonderful addition to our sinks! Don't have to juggle between carrying your little one and washing their hands at the same time!" —K1525Price: $10.99 for a two-pack
A compact, portable Jool Baby travel potty seat that can make an adult seat the perfect size for little potty trainers. Save your back from holding them up onto the seat in public restrooms so they don't fall in because the bare minimum here means no peeing toddler clinging to you and bringing your face inches from a public toilet.
This amazing potty seat comes with a travel bag and can be quickly and easily wiped clean with an antibacterial wipe. It suctions onto the toilet, keeping your kid both physically and mentally secure. Promising review: "This product has been a game changer for getting my toddler to use the potty in public. He is smaller, so normal potties are intimidating to him. I highly recommend this seat for any little kids!!! So easy to attach and fold up. Each to clean after, too. Such a brilliant product." —KatePrice: $14.99 (available in three colors)
A bottle of detangling spray for turning morning cryfests into a quick and easy process. This leave-in conditioner is hypoallergenic, all-natural, and gentle — plus it smells amazing.
I recently switched my fine-haired daughter over to this leave-in conditioner, and we both love it! The citrus vanilla scent is SO good, and it actually works. I can spray this on wet hair after a shower or on a knot in dry hair, and it's equally great. Promising review: "This stuff smells fantastic and works like magic! My kids have long, wavy hair, and this has become a part of their hair care routine because it's so amazing. It detangles, and the good smell lasts in their hair." —Mama KesPrice: $7.79
A formula-mixing pitcher, aka an absolute game changer for avoiding gas and getting formula ready, like, ~yesterday.~ Not having premade formula while you have a hangry baby should be low on your list of effort you want to use. And there's nothing like making an entire batch before bed and easily pouring a bottle when you're still half asleep.
The formula comes out clump-free, can be made up to 24 hours in advance, and has no bubbles, which can lead to gas. If you're a nursing mama, it can also re-mix breast milk. Promising review: "I love this pitcher; it is the perfect size. Easy to use so that you can store formula for the whole day, and it removes air bubbles in the milk. If you have a baby registry, make sure to add this gift." —RhondaPrice: $10.49 (available in three colors)
A cool mist humidifier that'll help soothe when your kiddo comes down with a cold and hopefully get them back up and running sooner. I don't know about you, but I have precisely zero minutes to waste on yet another virus my kids bring home.
So many people swear by humidifiers, but I had never used one before having a baby. If you're a skeptic like I was, I can verify that getting a humidifier has been so helpful, especially now that my kids are a bit older. Whenever I see the first sign of a sniffle, I pull the humidifier out and see dramatic improvement when I try to grit my teeth and hold on until it passes. Promising review: "This humidifier has been a blessing! Our other one got wet so we ordered this. I was skeptical because of the size, but it actually works great!! I love the different selections you get for what type of speed you want for your humidity and light." —JayPrice: $39.99 (available in two colors)
A super convenient Ubbi grape cutter to take all of the work out of minimizing choking hazards. Quickly insert the grape or tomato and slice it into a safer size — especially when you have several young kids or are prepping for a party or play date. One less thing to worry about!
Price: $9.99
A snack storage solution so they can quickly grab their treats with zero fuss and zero wasted time.
Promising review: "I have type 1 diabetes, and I use this as my snack tray when my blood sugar drops. So now I can easily see what I have, and my family can get something quickly for me. This could be used for so many different things. Great product!" —mzmullisPrice: $19.99
And a set of clear fridge organizers that'll make preparing meals and snacks easy and efficient rather than chaotic and frustrating. Keep your essentials at the ready and just watch how easy you'll make it look.
Promising review: "Great addition to our fridge! Helps keep our fridge more organized and makes it look better, too! Great thick material. Very easy to clean, too!" —SamyasPrice: $25 for a four-piece set
A touchscreen toaster so they can ~independently~ figure out exactly how they want their toast without figuring out what the number dial actually means (I mean — do any of us REALLY?). Just touch the image of what you're toasting, touch the image of how dark you want it, and enjoy the benefits of a morning that doesn't include scraping char off of toast.
Promising review: "This toaster is amazing. The countdown clock and toast color options are so handy. Makes perfect toast every time!" —Oswald LuciusPrice: $59.99 (originally $299.99)
A Shark handheld vacuum to quickly pick up crumbs under the table or high chair without getting on your hands and knees with the dustbin. Save yourself time, energy, and effort by quickly sucking up crumbs and enjoying the feeling of walking near the table without Cheerios sticking to your feet.
For the longest time, I used a dustpan and broom to get my kids' crumbs after meals. It wasn't that big of a deal, but it was annoying. I finally decided to treat myself to a handheld vacuum, and I do not regret anything except for waiting so long to get one. It's one of those really small things that really did make one part of parenting so much less work. Now that my baby is a big kid, she happily vacuums up after meals that are still messy years later. Promising review: "I absolutely LOVE this little vacuum! It's so easy to use — my 2-year-old, who likes to help, can even use this vacuum. It's powerful and the attachments are easy to exchange. It is bagless and easy to empty; you can charge it easily from any outlet. I have a long-haired cat who sheds a lot and this vacuum works well for pet hair." —StruPrice: $69.99 (originally $99.99)
A fan-favorite Skylight calendar for keeping all of your family appointments in plain sight. Not only does it automatically sync to your calendars, you can set up chore charts for your family members and keep lists all in one place.
This calendar does use a subscription for a wider range of functions, but the calendar, chore chart, and lists (aka the most important) don't require anything extra. That being said, it's a huge time saver since it connects to Google Calendar, iCloud Calendar, and Outlook Calendar to keep everyone's schedule in one place. Promising review: "This literally does it all! There is also an app that goes along with it so you can see your calendar on the go & it can be separately accessed by your spouse or kids as well! The chore charts and reward stars are great for kids. The meal planning calendar is such a great tool. Being able to have everyone's schedule all in one place is just great. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️" —ADPrice: $279.99 (originally $319.99)
A shoe organizer to keep footwear front and center rather than *maybe-possibly-under-the-bed-will-you-just-find-it??*. This low-profile storage solution can keep things organized and out of the way and shave off precious minutes from getting out of the house.
Promising review: "No more messy entryway whenever we have guests. This is a very nice piece. Sturdy and easy to assemble. Happy with this purchase." —ken210Price: $102.99
A document holder AND backpack station that can hold documents, backpacks, and a sweater without completely gunking up your entryway. Each kid can have a station because you do NOT need to search for the backpack and homework folder as you're trying to get everyone out for school.
Each organizer can hold up to 25 pounds, so if you have middle or high-school-aged kids, it might not work if they keep heavy textbooks in their backpacks. Try something more heavy-duty to clean up the entryway and keep things organized. Promising review: "This was perfect for our preschool homework station! Kept homework in the pocket and hung backpacks on the hooks! So functional yet still very modern and sleek." —JosiPrice: $24
An easy-to-use toy storage solution if the very idea of packing up a vast array of toys is exhausting in and of itself. Simply pile toys into the mat, gather them, and collect up to nine pounds in one beautiful scoop. Even the youngest toddlers can scoop and dump — because you have no time to waste picking up hundreds of tiny toys.
Price: $53.99 (originally $83.99)
A Bissell vacuum/mop combo that'll make your old bucket and mop system completely obsolete. This machine will vacuum and mop at the same time, keeping your floors squeaky clean and allowing you to forget there was ever a time when you would wipe the crumbs off your feet on your pant leg.
Promising review: "It is a great product, especially for people who don't have time to waste. The product is easy to use, it cleans and mops simultaneously, you don't have to switch from vacuum to mop, and it sanitizes. The first time I used it, I could see the difference on my floors." —SashaPrice: $179 (originally $229.99)
A gentle alarm clock for your older kids that doubles as a night-light and an OK-to-wake clock for your youngins'. The light gradually gets brighter to help wake them up more peacefully than you in a "GET UP OR WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE" panic.
Promising review: "I use this as my alarm clock. The light feature that turns on 15 minutes prior to my set alarm time is wonderful! It slowly gets brighter, and I am always awake before the alarm sounds. It's nice to not wake up the whole house. The night-light feature options are very pretty and nice to have just before going to sleep." —JBPrice: $30
A magnetic responsibility chart so the ~responsibility~ of getting ready in the morning doesn't land fully on your busy shoulders.
This chart comes with 92 magnets for personal, communal, and social skills and a dry-erase marker for any goal that might not be included in the provided magnets. If you have a non-reader, check out this simplified version for the morning and evening routines!Promising review: "A probably one of my favorite purchases from target. Really helps my toddler to understand responsibilities and keeps us on track for the day!" —JessicadrakePrice: $25.49
An electric toothbrush because absolutely no one has any time for cavities. This toothbrush comes with an app to help ensure your kids are brushing those mouthbones rather than taking a swipe and calling it a day.
Promising review: "Daughter loved that she could choose the design on her toothbrush. Cleans teeth very well. The app helps her stay constant with brushing for the full length of time. Really happy with the product. Works better than other electric toothbrushes we have tried in the past." —TargetMomPrice: $34.99 (available in pink and blue)
A car seat buckle release tool that'll protect your nails *and* your patience from how surprisingly difficult unbuckling is. Plus — when they're older — they can learn to unbuckle themselves, ensuring that you are not burying your face in the drop-off line as you get out of the car to unbuckle your kid. The car seat buckle desperately needs to be one less thing you fight with.
Promising review: "Liked the colors. Bought one for each car. My daughter can now unbuckle herself with this which helps speed up the drop off line at school." —EricaPrice: $28.99 for a two-pack (available in two color combos)
A backseat storage bag to store toys, snacks, or whatever else they need as you're chauffeuring them to all of their practices. If you're on the go often, having some snacks always at the ready is going to save a lot of energy.
If you're keeping this in your car full-time, only pack snacks that won't melt. Promising review: "Love how this can fit on the seat of my car or on the floor. Love the pockets on the sides that allow me to put items that I need but don't want my twins getting into. Fits so much stuff and perfect for a road trip." —TwinmamaPrice: $15
And a portable trash bin that'll help keep tissues, snack wrappers, and other garbage from filling up the backseat. Just stash the trash, empty it, and enjoy the freedom of not having to chase down snack wrappers that fall out when you open the car door.
I keep a small trash can with me, and I am always surprised at how quickly it fills up. Luckily, the trash can fills up instead of my backseat. It's so easy to empty while I'm at a gas station or quickly before I head out with the kids, and it's saved so much mess. Promising review: "I love this trash can for my car. I have one in each vehicle. Its small and can easily be squished out of the way if needed. This is the first trash can my kids use in the car." —ChrisPrice: $10
A visual timer to help make transitions easier for everyone. Since kids can't tell time, "five more minutes" doesn't mean much. With this handy timer, they can watch the colored portion get smaller and be less shocked when time is up. If you have a kid who struggles with transitions (like mine!) or doesn't understand any time but NOW, this timer is for you because no one has time for a meltdown.
Price: $35.04
And a foot massager because at the end of the day, you deserve a little relaxation too, darn it. You might as well give those dogs a little rest — because tomorrow's busy day is already calling.
Price: $109.99
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Yahoo
12 hours ago
- Yahoo
I Was Today Years Old When I Learned That These 23 Things Can Kill You
Listen — we all know the internet can be a horrific, dark place, but it can also be an incredible resource that teaches you things you're shocked you had no idea about. You know — those things that you feel like there should've been a high school "how to be an adult" class on? Well, this post is exactly what I'm talking about here. Both Redditors and members of the BuzzFeed Community shared the simple — and sometimes seemingly harmless things — that, believe it or not, can actually kill you. I'll be honest, I had no idea about half of these, and these people have probably saved my butt a time or two. Here are 23 unexpectedly deadly things they shared: 1."Leaving food out on the counter." —u/Ok_Application7142 "I made garlic-infused olive oil once. Left it out because that's how I always saw it on people's counters. Used it a few weeks later. I got botulism. I was out for four whole days, writhing in pain with nothing left to expel. Turns out, I could have died." —u/Zabroccoli The USDA advises not to leave food out for more than two hours in cool weather and one hour if it's 90° or higher. Temperatures of 40 to 140° are the "danger zone" for bacterial growth, with the amount of bacteria doubling in as little as 20 minutes. 2."Garage door springs." —u/TheDarkRabbit "My father-in-law drunkenly pulled the emergency release red cord on our very old, SOLID wood garage door. The door fell down with such force that it dislodged the spring, and that thing shot right through the wooden garage door, shattering it into a million pieces! It was the most terrifying moment. Had that spring shot in the other direction, there would have been multiple fatalities, I'm sure of it." —u/Ambrosia0201 3."Cat and dog bites. My cat bit me, and I ended up in surgery because the infection was anaerobic. I could have lost my thumb or gotten sepsis. Go to a doctor to get an animal bite cleaned." —sdk "Cat scratches, too, especially for people with compromised immune systems." —jcorey1513 Contrary to the name, both cat scratches and bites can lead to Cat Scratch Fever — a bacterial infection your cat can give you if they've been bitten by a flea. 4."Giving infants water to drink. It doesn't have to be much; water intoxication can kill them very easily." —u/19Thanatos83 5."For adults: Drinking lots of water while also trying to be 'healthy' by going low-sodium can mess you up badly if your potassium levels go too low. I did that and spent a week in a coma." "Now I have to take supplements, drink lots of Gatorade, and put lots of salt in/on my foods, or my blood pressure plunges, and I have to worry about falling in the shower because my compression socks are off." —shelleye "Water toxicity isn't limited to babies, BTW. Once I got a migraine on a hot day. I called the doctor, and he told me to drink more water. So I did. It got worse, and I started to get nauseated. He said, again, to drink more water. So I did. He failed to ask, at the beginning, how much water I had already been drinking. Which was A LOT. More than most people. Cut to later that day. I came to in my sister's living room. I had made it there on the bus, but I didn't remember how. I was confused and acting really weird. I had thrown up several times, then I fell asleep. She thought I was just really sick. I realized later that I had water toxicity. I could've died, all because the doctor didn't bother to ask how much water I was drinking and assumed my migraine (which I got ALL the time) had been from dehydration. There is too much of a good thing." —pandamama710 When things like overconsuming water affect the sodium levels in your blood (like the latter story), it's called hyponatremia. When this, like in the former case, affects your potassium levels specifically (as potassium is an electrolyte), it's called hypokalemia. 6."Rags covered in linseed oil can spontaneously combust when left in a pile. I randomly discovered this fact in a Reddit post titled, "The new guy burned down our workshop." A carpenter I know confirmed that this is a real thing. I've been getting into refinishing old furniture, so I'm glad I learned this now. You'd think it'd be more common knowledge!" —u/doctor_x "I'm sure most people know this, but it doesn't have to be linseed oil; basically any type of combustible liquid can have the same reaction. Oil, gasoline, kerosene, paint thinner, etc. Always store your dirty rags in a metal, fireproof canister designed for that purpose. Bonus items that can, under the right circumstances, burst into flames: grains, animal manure, hay, woodchips. While some people just want to see the world burn, some seemingly benign items do, too." —srandlett25 "My cousin nearly died in a house fire from this. My aunt's dog saved his life. And yes, they both survived." —kelseyc48a791d61 According to NASA, this is a reaction known as auto-oxidation. Essentially, linseed oil — which is a "self-ignition combustible" — reacts with the oxygen in the air and can spontaneously heat, thus causing a fire. 7."A dental infection. I went to grief support meetings, and a woman there lost her son to an impacted tooth that spread infection to his brain." —u/jefuchs "I worked in a dental office for a good while, and we had a patient with chronic periodontal disease and a small tooth abscess that wasn't coming in for treatments as directed, and wasn't taking prescribed antibiotics as directed. Next thing we heard, she was in the ICU with endocarditis, among other things that they linked directly to the infection in her mouth. She survived and got some of it treated in the hospital, but as soon as she could, she was in our office like clockwork for the rest of her treatments." —s45b9ebeb9 8."If potatoes are not stored properly and become rotten, they produce a toxic gas called solanine and can make a person unconscious if they've inhaled enough, and result in death in some cases. There was a news article back in 2013 of an entire family in Russia that was killed by it." —u/Moon_Jewel90 "I about died from this as a kid. My grandma had a potato box in her kitchen, which is exactly what it sounds like. It was a wooden box about the size of a trash can and had a lid on top that she stored potatoes in. When I was 10 or so, I was playing in the kitchen, and I got curious about it. I was never especially interested because, like, it was a potato box. What do I wanna look at some potatoes for? But for whatever reason, I got curious, opened the lid, and woke up on the floor sometime later with my chest burning so badly that I could barely draw breath to cry for what felt like ages. I didn't find out why exactly that happened until I was an adult and saw a comment like this on Reddit, but I was scared to even go NEAR that damn potato box for the rest of my childhood." —u/Zazulio 9."Flowing water that is only inches deep can still have the strength to sweep you away if you're not careful." —u/akumamatata8080 "When I was a kid, one of my friends died this way. The family was crossing a shallow river in a Landcruiser Troopcarrier with lifted suspension, and the undercurrent swept the car away immediately. The mom, dad, and sister escaped in time, but my mate (around 7 years old) couldn't undo his seatbelt fast enough and drowned." —u/Mike9601 and u/commiecomrade 10."Mixing bleach and ammonia when you clean produces a toxic gas that will make you REALLY sick. " —u/Any_Assumption_2023 "This is why you don't use bleach to clean litter boxes!" —j458091739 Bleach + ammonia = chloramine gas, which — when inhaled — can cause coughing, nausea, shortness of breath, chest pain, wheezing, pneumonia, and fluid in the lungs. 11."Pressure washers are quite lethal." —u/floydie1962 "Can confirm: pressure washers are dangerous. Mine stripped a layer of my sandal sole off when I accidentally blasted my foot with it, and it stung for about a day. It wasn't a super duper ultra-powerful pressure washer, either." —u/swithinboy59 "I was just using one about a month ago, and like a dummy, I stuck my hand out and it sliced my finger wide open. It was just like getting cut with a dull knife, it hurt like a MF." —zmyersmyers" 12."Going to sleep while drunk and choking on your own vomit. Always lay your drunk friends on their side and lift their chin to open their airways. DO NOT lay them on their backs. My friend died from this at age 32." —u/K8syk8 13."Slipping down the stairs. Yes, some people know stairs can be dangerous, but many don't realize how deadly residential stairs can be." —u/Parking_War_4100 "Did that. Got a concussion and five staples in my head." —u/thebeamingbean 14."Ladders. People think you have to fall far to get hurt or die. Eight feet is plenty." —u/Ancient-Valuables "I was always told falling your own height can kill you." —u/Quality_Street_1 15."Tylenol. The dangerous dosage is only about four times the therapeutic dosage." —u/Waltzing_With_Bears Taking Tylenol as intended can provide pain relief, but taking more than the advised dosage can have serious medical consequences, such as permanent liver damage, seizures, coma, and death. 16."A lot of medication interactions. Mucinex DM with antidepressants, Tylenol for a hangover. Always look up the potential drug interactions of medications. Every time. I've had doctors give me some deadly cocktails because they neglected to check them against the meds I was already taking. It happens more than you'd think." —u/otterboviously "My grandfather nearly died a few months ago because his doctor prescribed him a medication that interacted with one he was already taking, because he couldn't be bothered to check. I've also had medications prescribed that would interact with ones I was already taking. Always ask your doctor about interactions, because they won't always check." —anonynasty There are tons of handy drug interaction checkers online; however, always make sure to ask your pharmacist or doctor if you're uncertain. This is also true for over-the-counter medications and supplements, not just prescription medication. 17."Party buses. My wife's cousin was on one a couple of years ago. They were all dancing on the bus while it was driving on the 101 freeway in LA. She slipped and fell against the door, which gave way. She fell out of the bus and was immediately run over by a car. There wasn't much left of her, closed casket for sure. She was celebrating her 30th birthday, but instead, she died and left behind 5 kids, all under 10." —u/bowlskioctavekitten 18."Cheerleading. I had an accident and almost died because one of my teammates lost their balance while I was on top, and I fell. I broke my neck and I haven't been able to walk or move most of my body again since." —u/Glum_Benefit3704 19."Other people mowing the lawn. My stepdad was cutting the grass 300-400 ft from the house. He hit a rock and it flew all the way to the house, through two panes of glass, and between me and my mom sitting by the window It shattered the glass on the oven door." "I had always heard about the dangers of being around running lawnmowers, but didn't think much about it. That rock could have blinded or killed someone. Now I know, but people think I am nuts when I tell them to put their kids in the house when cutting the grass." —luckyangel30 20."Playing in a deep hole at the beach. Everyone forgets how heavy dirt actually is." —u/GuiltyLawyer and u/Is_Unable "When I was a little kid, there was a construction project at my school, and there were trenches. They did a demonstration where they took the strongest kid in the school of 1,000 students and had him lie down on the stage. Someone placed a bucket of soil on his chest, and then he tried to stand up. He couldn't move it. They even supported the bucket to make sure he wouldn't get hurt from it being too much weight. That was educational." —u/St_Kevin_ 21."Hitting your head. r/TBI is full of stories about simple slips and falls that resulted in death and lasting effects. I simply fell on ice at work once. Bam! Unconscious. I woke up saying I was OK but got talked into getting in an ambulance. I started dying in the ambulance from a severe brain bleed. I was in a coma and was expected to die, but I survived. I lost most of my memory, emotional stability, the ability to easily make new memories, and a ton of IQ. Still…in all, I'm not dead!" —u/cbelt3 "Always protect your head! I worked in a mental hospital with a Neurology Department. We had SO MANY kids and grown folks who had serious brain damage from a head blow that didn't seem that serious at first. In particular, I remember a little boy who was climbing a fence and fell, hitting the concrete below. He ended up in a wheelchair with a mental age of 2-3 years for life. In addition, you would be shocked at how many women ended up having seizures and brain damage from being whacked in the head by their men." —luckyangel30 22."A grape. My wife had a friend/coworker whose young daughter choked to death in front of her and her mother. They tried to dislodge the grape, but nothing worked. By the time an ambulance got there, the girl was brain dead. It's about the worst thing I can imagine as a parent. We were cutting our kids' grapes in half until they were 10 after that happened." —u/jpiro finally, "Confined spaces. If it only has one way in and out, especially if it is below ground, there is a very real possibility that there isn't enough oxygen in there to support life. Even something as simple as rusting metal can remove the oxygen from the air, and if there isn't airflow going through the space, the oxygen-depleted air won't be replaced. Other processes can remove oxygen or produce actively toxic gases. This sort of thing often kills more than one person, as the first person to find the victim goes in to rescue them and becomes the second victim." —u/SuspiciouslyMoist Do you know of a simple thing like these that can accidentally kill people? If so, tell us about it in the comments below. Note: Submissions have been edited for length, clarity, and factual accuracy.
Yahoo
a day ago
- Yahoo
People Who Found Out About Their Spouses' Sinister Secrets After Marrying Them Are Sharing What Happened, And It's Really Frightening
We recently covered a Reddit thread that asked users who discovered major secrets about their spouses after marriage to share their stories. This inspired members of the BuzzFeed Community who have endured similar revelations to open up about their experiences. Here's what people shared: 1."My ex-husband neglected to tell me that he was more interested in men than women. When I did find out, I was pregnant and not working due to severe morning sickness. I wanted to run, but I felt trapped. More of his lies came out, and we divorced a couple of years later. I found out during the divorce that he was soliciting men on Craigslist and inviting them to the house while he was taking care of my daughter." —Anonymous 2."After working to get my husband through medical school and putting off finishing my college career until he graduated, he had an affair with his assistant, and she had his baby while we were still married. I finished my Master's and divorced him." —Anonymous 3."This guy was pursuing me to no end, even sending flowers to my job. I finally agreed to marry him. I never loved him, really. But I was willing to learn to love him. Then, he started acting strange when we picked out a house to buy. I had a VA loan and discovered his name couldn't be on the deed because of a foreclosure. His ex-wife still lived in the home and refused to pay mortgage payments. So, once I purchased our home on my own, he was infuriated that he'd have to sign a disclosure agreement and that he'd have no rights to the property. That didn't stop him from getting a restraining order against me a year later and trying to have me forced from the home when I filed for divorce. He was a true loser." —Anonymous 4."My husband didn't tell me he still owned a condo with his ex and was still close with her and her current husband. I found an email in which he complained to her about how rude my children were. He invited his ex and her husband to visit us, but he didn't tell me until they arrived, and we were scheduled to join them for dinner." —Anonymous 5."My husband didn't tell me he was already married to another man. At first, I was horrified, but it turns out they are both bi and very into me. I'm now enjoying two husbands." —Anonymous 6."He told me he didn't want to buy me an engagement ring because he'd rather use the money for a down payment on a house. I found out after we were married that there was no money. He said he had a BS in Sociology when he was actually five classes shy of his degree. I found this out after being married for 18 years. He told me he never used any drugs, but I found out when we were divorcing that he was getting high with our kids as a bonding experience and that when he was younger, he used to get so drunk/high that he'd crawl out to his car from bars. He was a Boy Scout leader for our son's troop, and I found out he was forging signatures on badges, so my son's scouting career was false. It took me 24 years to be rid of him." —Anonymous 7."He told me he was divorced. Then, a week before our wedding, he had to go to court to get his divorce finalized. I would never have dated a married man. Then, he had an affair and told his new woman that he and I were already divorced. Pathological liar." —Anonymous 8."My ex-husband of 20 years told me after we were married and moved to another state that he had a little girl. The little girl is six months younger than my son. My son was born in July; she was born in December of the same year. We also got married in March of that year. He claims it was before we were married, but we were engaged and had set plans to fly to Miami to get married. I never had another child by him." —Anonymous 9."My ex didn't tell me he had a problem with being on the internet. I found out after six years of marriage that he had a secret Facebook account with only women on it, saying he liked to get down and dirty. I also found out he was doing live porn on the internet with other people posting his privates all over the internet. Needless to say, I divorced him." —Anonymous 10."Before marriage, he pretended to be kind, helpful, a good father, and employed with a steady job. He later admitted to stealing all of my money and all of the kids' money from their savings accounts, as well as spending tens of thousands of dollars on sex workers during work hours as a children's social worker. We're divorced." 11."Lying is integral to my soon-to-be ex's negative value system. He said he loved me; he didn't. He said his grandparents had a small bank account in our name; they didn't. He said he had kidney cancer; he didn't. He said he didn't get money from his brother's estate; he did. He said he'd take me to Hawaii when I finished my thesis; he didn't. I had no idea when I married the loser that everything he said was a lie." —Anonymous 12."This happened in the late 1990s. About a year or so into our marriage, my then/first wife showed me a final collection notice on unpaid college loans. She was visibly upset, insisting that she never got any prior notices in the mail. It got me mad. I cashed out an investment and paid it off to make the debt collector disappear. A couple years later, she asked for a divorce and moved out. In the summer of 1999, I was going through my house, clearing out her excess stuff, when I opened up a storage bin and found — surprise, surprise — all the prior collection notices she had hidden away. That was the least of the eye-opening discoveries I learned about her. We divorced in March 2000. Exactly a year later, I met a sweet woman and married her two years later. We've been happily married for 21 years. Oh yeah, and we both pay our bills on time." —Anonymous 13."Three years after we were married, I found out that my husband is sexually attracted to men. I found a questionable male picture on his computer while restoring it from a virus, and I made it his desktop image, hoping he would object to it somehow. Instead, he didn't bat an eye. When I confronted him, he said, 'I'm working on that.' We obviously are not together anymore." —Anonymous 14."Wooh! Where do these folks come from?!? First, it was his age (older than he stated), then a story about being in the military. Now, the icing on the cake: his baby momma was in labor with twins on our wedding day! All his guests knew what was up. I had no clue and was pregnant really soon after the wedding. Now it makes sense why he wasn't thrilled we were pregnant." —Anonymous 15."I only found out that my husband had previously been married when I went to register my child's birth at the embassy. To top it off, he was still married to that person in another country. He did not think it counted since he permanently left that country. Needless to say, he had to pay legal fees in two countries and travel there to get a divorce. I only believed him when I saw the legal documents translated and submitted to our local courts." —Anonymous 16."My then-boyfriend, now husband, always brought me little gifts and cards. I was young and he was 10 years older. I thought it was so sweet and thoughtful. It definitely was a big reason I fell for him. It wasn't until years later that I realized his mom and sister were buying the cards and gifts. It wasn't his thoughtfulness at all." —Anonymous 17."I am a physician, and he is a teacher. Years after we were married, he basically told me that I was not good enough and that he would never have married me if he had been a physician or lawyer. I am his third wife. We are in the process of getting divorced." —Anonymous 18."My ex-husband went into great detail about his yellow truck at home in California (I'm in CT) and said he had broken off an engagement. At our wedding, his mother told me that she had to break up with his ex-fiancée for him when she came over for her regular dinner time when the family was preparing to come for the wedding. Also, he never owned a vehicle. I had been driving him everywhere. He never let me talk to his mom. He cheated on me, so we are not together anymore." "My other ex-husband, as it turned out, had never been with another woman before me. That would be fine, but he told me he had been with three. Two didn't have names, but one was named Zoe, and he made up her backstory. It all came crashing down when he said he had gone to Machu Pichu with her and didn't know what country it was in. I was with him for eight years, and so many wild stories about him exist. I've been divorced for quite a while." —awkwardlamp47 19."I was working with a dental office shortly after graduating from high school, but before I started design school at the Pasadena School of Design. This character supposedly was a dental student at USC, and I was naïve enough to believe him. Two years later, married to this delusional liar and pregnant with our first child, I was still unaware that he wasn't a dentist but just a guy making false teeth for patients. It got worse. He became physically abusive, but my two children and I were able to escape his lies and abuse. I recently got a friend request from him on Facebook. No way in hell would I befriend him." —Anonymous 20."We got engaged after 10 glorious days. A year and a half later, we married. Then, he casually told me everything he told me when we got together was all lies. He didn't know or want me, much less love me. He just wanted to 'do' me but knew I wanted to wait for marriage. Also, he was homeless because his ex left, and he couldn't pay the rent. Many years and kids later, I still feel used. People think we are so happy, but I feel empty inside. Our children, who are on their own and doing well, know their dad is only here because I pay all the bills." —Anonymous 21."My dad was 12 years older than my mom, so he lied about being 40 since he didn't think she would be interested at 28. He had always looked young, so it was easy to pull off. The day she found out his real age was at the courthouse when they were signing the marriage license. He thought she would be so mad, but she laughed it off since she was so in love at that point and didn't care how old he was. She would always lovingly retell the story while he looked on embarrassed." —cute-as-ducks419 22."He only married me for a green card. He was dating other women the whole time we were married. One of his dates called and clued me in. Hello, divorce lawyer!" —Anonymous 23."When I met my future husband, we were making small talk at a Saturday night gathering for single people. I was in my early 20s. He was 10 years older than me, incredibly handsome, and seemed kind. I asked him if he had plans for the upcoming week. He said his friend was having a baby, and he was going to see them sometime that week. It sounded normal enough. I innocently assumed he meant a guy friend, and the friend's wife was having a baby, and my dude was being supportive. Two years later, we were engaged. After we were married, he told me the 'friend' he had mentioned the night we met was actually his ex-girlfriend." "They were going through a breakup when I met him; the baby was his. That pregnancy had ended due to a stillbirth the week we met. I was amazed that he thought he couldn't tell me the truth about that situation at some reasonable point before we married. I would not have married him if they'd had a baby, but I chalked it all up to 'live and learn.' I was trying to do the 'right thing' and honor my marriage vows by forgiving him and putting that in the past. I divorced him 24 years later when I gradually found out he had racked up many thousands of dollars in debt over the years without telling me and had hidden that from me by eventually taking over the financial 'management' of our shared bank account, a task I had openly done for us for years. He had also invested his pension from early retirement, which was a substantial sum of money that could have sustained a humble but secure lifestyle for us for the rest of our lives, into a business venture with an acquaintance against my adamant disagreement. The acquaintance turned out to be a crook who had convinced my ex to allow him to 'manage the finances' since they were business partners. The guy stole all of my ex's (our) money and disappeared with all of the equipment, files, and computers from the business. The acquaintance was operating under an alias and wanted in another state for doing the same thing to somebody else. I am so relieved to be out of that tough marriage. I am much poorer, wiser, and not impressed with the quality of men my age I've met. The bar now is so incredibly low. I don't know if I want to be with anyone again." —Anonymous "My first husband told me right after we were married that he wasn't in love with me yet, but he said he would learn to love me over time. We lasted 20 years and had three kids before his dysfunctional behavior finally made me realize I couldn't fix what started broken." —Anonymous Gosh, how devastating and unsettling. It's incredible how some people can hide their true colors from even those closest to them. Scary stuff. If you also married someone who hid major parts of themselves from you, what happened? Tell us in the comments or submit anonymously using this form. Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
Buzz Feed
2 days ago
- Buzz Feed
The Hidden Financial Side Of Gender Transition
If you're a longtime BuzzFeed reader, you might recognize the handsome face of Ash Perez. Ash was making videos with us back in the golden age of BuzzFeed, alongside folks like Quinta Brunson. Now, after coming out as trans in 2023, he's working on a series with the Try Guys called New Guy Tries, all about exploring his masculinity. Recently, Ash stopped by Financial Feminist Podcast, hosted by Tori Dunlap, to talk about the costs of his transition. In the episode description, Tori wrote, "This is a great episode if you've ever been curious about the experience of your trans friends and neighbors, especially if you've wondered how to be a better ally to their community." One part of their conversation is taking off online, where Ash gets into all the costs that have gone into his transition. Here's what he had to say: First, Ash shared that he enrolled in gender therapy to explore his identity. "I was paying, I think, $350 out of pocket for that, for one session." He also had top surgery and got his eggs frozen as part of his transition in case he wants to have kids someday. Ash shared that he spends about $20 a month on testosterone. According to a 2022 study in The Journal of Law, Medicine and Ethics, the cost of gender affirming surgery can range from around $7,000 to $63,000, depending on the procedure. In the US, health insurance plans that get federal funding are required to cover gender affirming care, but how much is covered (and how challenging it is to get) can vary widely depending on each individual's plan and location. Private health insurance plans that don't receive federal funding can opt not to cover this healthcare, despite the fact that the American Medical Association endorses it as essential. "Then [there's] the cost, again, of taking off work, having someone take care of you," Ash continued. "Finding community, camps. There's amazing resources for trans people, but, like, you pay for those spaces." Before Trump's executive order requiring documents like passports to reflect gender assigned at birth, Ash also spent $500 updating his documents from female to male. Then, Ash shared an unexpected cost. "I'm going through fucking puberty again. The amount that I've spent just now on acne care that I thought I was fucking done with is been monstrous." He also needed a whole new wardrobe as he transitioned. "The first is changing your style. And then on testosterone. I'm literally growing." Tori chimed in to point out that Ash lives in Los Angeles, and Ash replied, "What if you're in Kentucky? And by the way, if you're trans in Kentucky, you probably don't have the doctors that I have access to, so you're gonna fly for surgery. I would say probably over 50% of trans people have to fly to get the care that they need." Finally, Ash estimated that he's spent at least $15,000 on his transition so far. He further summed it up by saying his transition has included many costs, some expected, some surprising, and some truly heartbreaking, like the cost of facing discrimination. "It's not just what you're spending. It's what you're not earning." In the comments, more people shared what they've spent on their transition: And opened up about some of the hidden costs: Seeing the costs laid out like this is a peek into the trans experience that we don't often get to see in media, and I'm so glad that Ash opened up about this side of his journey. Understanding the financial impact involved in transitioning really goes to show how much it means to the people who are on this path, because it's such a big commitment to take on. Can you relate? If you feel comfortable, share what you've spent on gender-affirming care in the comments! Looking for more LGBTQ+ or Pride content? Then check out all of BuzzFeed's posts celebrating Pride 2025.
