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Yahoo
7 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
The No. 1 Sign You Were Raised by a Narcissist, According to a Psychologist
This story discusses child abuse. If you are a child being abused, or know a child who may be facing abuse, call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at (800) 422-4453, or go to States often have child abuse hotlines, but if you suspect a child's life is in imminent danger, call 911. If you've been on the internet lately, you've probably seen the term "narcissist" thrown around. It's become a common label used to describe toxic traits and behaviors, often in the context of romantic relationships. You may think of the classic love-bombing, manipulative cheater or the arrogant, entitled spouse who is always right. Another type of relationship that's often plagued by narcissism is the one between a parent and child. The narcissistic parent trope is often depicted in film, such as Faye Dunaway's role in "Mommie Dearest," or the neglectful parents in "Matilda." Narcissistic parents can shape the entire family dynamic and have a lasting impact on a child's wellbeing. However, children of narcissists may not realize this until they're struggling with the effects years or decades later. How can you tell if a parent was a narcissist? spoke to Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., clinical psychologist, narcissism expert and author of "It's Not You," about the telltale signs that a person might've been raised by a narcissistic parent or caregiver. "Narcissism is a personality style or pattern that's characterized by some pretty set qualities and traits, and you have to have most, if not all, of them to call someone narcissistic," Durvasula tells These include inflated self-importance, an excessive need for validation and admiration, entitlement, lack of empathy, pathological selfishness and arrogance, Durvasula explains. Narcissists often believe they are "special," and expect favorable treatment. Narcissism exists on a spectrum. Most people will exhibit some narcissistic qualities, to varying degrees, at different points in their lives (i.e. toddlers). However, a narcissist has displayed a consistent pattern of these traits and behaviors, often to the extent that it causes problems in their life or for others. In relationships, narcissism can translate into manipulation, invalidation, betrayal or gaslighting, Durvasula adds. A common misconception is that 'narcissism' is a disorder, says Durvasula. 'Saying someone's narcissistic isn't diagnosing them. Assuming you've paid attention to the patterns, it's making a comment on their personality," she adds. However, nrcissistic personality disorder is a disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. The DSM-5 defines NPD as a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration and lack of empathy, which begin in early adulthood and affect all areas of life, as indicated by meeting at least five out of nine specific criteria, per the Cleveland Clinic. In order to be diagnosed with NPD, you have to be formally evaluated by a psychologist or psychiatrist. Bu there's the problem. "A lot of narcissistic people aren't going to therapy," Durvasula says. Even if they do, they may not be able to identify narcissistic traits or connect them to problems in their lives. As a result, there are many people who meet the criteria but will never be diagnosed with NPD. 'There are also people who have a diagnosis of NPD, and their narcissism isn't nearly as severe as the many, many people out there who have never been diagnosed." As far as the prevalence of NPD, there is a lack of 'good' data, says Durvasula, but research suggests it affects 1–6% of the population. That said, the number of people who have a narcissistic personality type (but not necessarily NPD) is likely much higher. When a narcissist becomes a parent or caregiver, these traits can significantly impact how they raise children. 'The narcissistic parent often has a poor sense of differentiation from their child. ... Their child is an extension of themselves,' says Durvasula. They may view a child's independence as a threat, and use control and manipulation to maintain dominance. As a result, the child's needs and emotions are often neglected. Common traits among narcissistic parents include: Using children as a source of validation Prioritizing their needs over children's Having unreasonable expectations Being unable to understand children's feelings Being obsessed with their family's appearance Not respecting child's boundaries Giving love conditionally based on a child's ability to perform or meet their expectations Narcissistic parents often use enmeshment to control children. 'It's communicated in a million ways that the child doesn't get to be separate from the parent, so the child having a need or a want that's different would be selfish,' says Durvasula. They often put themselves first. 'There's no awareness, no attunement to their child,' Durvasula adds. Children may feel responsible for their parent's happiness, at the cost of their own desires and dreams. If a child shows emotions that evoke shame in the parent, they are often viewed as a 'bad kid.' They may blame one child for everything — the 'scapegoat' — or pit children against each other. Narcissistic parents also weaponize guilt. 'Even if they don't say it directly, they'll say, 'you owe me'," Durvasula says. 'Narcissistic parents view themselves as special or perfect, and they expect that from their children,' Durvasula says. Errors are often not tolerated, and when errors do happen, the parent may become verbally abusive or give the silent treatment. Generally, narcissistic parents lack empathy, but they can also be inconsistent with love. A narcissistic parent may have mostly bad days but one good day when they show glimpses of warmth and attention, which a child often holds onto, Durvasula notes. Due to the appearance-obsessed nature of narcissists, this dysfunction isn't always obvious. "It's this dichotomized space where the Christmas cards look great or the home looks great, but there's a real emotional impoverishment." Narcissistic relationships are also on a spectrum, Durvasula adds. At the most severe level, there's violence and abuse. "Most people are at the moderate-to-mild end ... but it's still incredibly invalidating." Growing up with a narcissistic parent or caregiver can significantly affect a person's development, mental health and behavior in childhood and adulthood. 'The child doesn't have options. They have to attach to their parents for survival. ... This is also who feeds them and houses them ... and who is meant to make them feel emotionally safe,' says Durvasula. In order to maintain that attachment, children will learn to modify themselves, she adds, which can impact self-esteem. The No. 1 sign that a person was raised by a narcissist is chronically feeling like they are "not enough," says Durvasula. "I haven't done enough. I didn't try hard enough. I didn't give enough. ... That's the guiding construct in their life." Other parenting styles or childhood trauma can also cause a person to feel this way, she adds. But "I think there's something unique about the child with a narcissistic parent, because the myth sold to the child is that there's always something they can do that would be enough." During adulthood, this may manifest as perfectionism, self-doubt, shame and imposter syndrome. 'They're always peddling faster and faster,' says Durvasula. 'You (think) you have to earn love. You have to earn validation. You have to earn being seen." They may struggle to set boundaries or become codependent people-pleasers because they're used to sacrificing themselves for a narcissistic parent. Another telltale sign a person was raised by a narcissist is "difficulty expressing needs, wants or aspirations," says Durvasula, adding that it's because they were made to feel ungrateful or selfish when they did. Inconsistent reactions from the narcissistic parent, like rage or emotional abandonment, also create anxiety. 'Yelling at a kid is terrible. Withdrawing and withholding from a kid is worse,' says Durvasula. These children become adults who fear speaking up. "(They think), 'I better not share what I need or I'm going to lose my partner, or if I try to negotiate for a higher salary, this person won't hire me, or if I say how I'm feeling people, will think I'm overly sensitive and dramatic," says Durvasula. First, always consult a mental health professional if you have concerns. Generally, the first step is acknowledging the parent's narcissistic behavior. "What they did wasn't OK, and it hurt you,' says Durvasula. Some children may struggle and feel disloyal, especially if the narcissistic parent had a difficult backstory, such as migration trauma or severe poverty. 'You can be compassionate (toward) their narrative, but what they did was not OK,' says Durvasula. Healing can look different for everyone. It may involve therapy, support groups and lifestyle changes. There's no one-size-fits-all approach for dealing with a narcissistic parent. Some people may not engage at all or limit communication, whereas others adopt coping strategies because they still live with their parents, for example. In any case, Durvasula recommends going into interactions prepared. "Have realistic expectations of this parent, recognize their limitations and interact with them as such." The parent may never apologize or change, but you can control your reactions and set boundaries. Durvasula suggests using a trick she calls narcissist bingo. "Make a bingo card, or write a list, with all the things they do ... whether it's criticism about your job or looks, or gaslighting." Next, decide on a number of bingo spaces they can fill before you disengage. "If you can't get out of the situation, do something else, go to the restroom and splash water on your face, walk to your car, whatever it is to help you regulate," says Durvasula. Finally, it's important to practice self-care and nurture your inner child. This article was originally published on
Yahoo
03-06-2025
- General
- Yahoo
Childhelp Launches 'Hope for a Safe Summer' Campaign to Protect Vulnerable Children During Summer Break
SCOTTSDALE, Ariz., June 03, 2025 (GLOBE NEWSWIRE) -- As families prepare for sun-soaked vacations and poolside fun, Childhelp is urging communities to stay alert to a quieter, more dangerous reality: For many children, summer is not a break — it's a breakdown of their most consistent safety net. That's why Childhelp is launching 'Hope for a Safe Summer' campaign — an effort to raise awareness and prevent child abuse during the months when it's most likely to go unnoticed. 'Summer should be a time of joy,' says Michael Medoro, Childhelp Chief of Staff and COO. 'But for children living in abusive or neglectful environments, the end of the school year often means the end of their daily contact with trusted adults who can step in and help.' Why summer is so risky for kids: Fewer mandatory reporters: During the school year, teachers, counselors, and coaches are often the first to spot signs of abuse. In fact, teachers are the primary reporters of child abuse in the U.S. But when school lets out, that critical connection disappears. Less structure and supervision: Summer often brings looser routines, more unsupervised time, and less oversight. This can lead to increased exposure to potential abusers, including family members, family friends, or online predators. According to the FBI, more than 500,000 predators are online at any given time, often targeting children who are spending more time alone on devices. Fewer interactions with safe adults: Families may isolate during vacations or due to financial constraints, which means fewer check-ins from neighbors, friends, or relatives who might otherwise notice signs of abuse. Some families may travel to visit extended relatives — and unfortunately, abuse can also occur in those environments. Increased stress at home: Summer can bring added financial strain due to childcare costs, food insecurity (when school meals are no longer available), and the pressure of vacations or camps. These stressors can increase the risk of abuse and reduce a parent or caregiver's ability to cope in healthy ways. Fewer calls for help: Despite the increased risk, child abuse reporting drops dramatically in the summer — with some studies showing as much as a 23% decrease in hotline calls. That doesn't mean abuse stops. It means it's going unseen. Childhelp's Hope for a Safe Summer The Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-4-A-CHILD) is available 24/7, staffed with professional counselors who provide immediate, confidential support and resources to children and adults in need. It remains a lifeline for those who have no other trusted adult to turn to. By donating just $22, one child can get the life-saving support they need through the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline. The campaign runs until August 31. About Childhelp: Founded by Sara O'Meara and Yvonne Fedderson in 1959, Childhelp® has brought the light of hope and healing into the lives of more than 13 million children as a leading national nonprofit organization dedicated to helping abused, neglected and at-risk children. Childhelp's programs and services include residential treatment services, children's advocacy centers, therapeutic foster care, group homes and child abuse prevention, education and training. The Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline serves children and adults nationwide 24/7 through phone, text and online chat. For more information, visit and follow Childhelp at MEDIA CONTACT: Jessica Parsons Meghan Krein Gordon C. James Public Relations Childhelp O: 602-274-1988 / C: 602-686-5746 O: 480-922-8215 / C: 480-528-0537 jparsons@ mkrein@ in retrieving data Sign in to access your portfolio Error in retrieving data Error in retrieving data Error in retrieving data Error in retrieving data
CBS News
24-04-2025
- CBS News
Protesters outside Meta's NYC office call for more protection for kids
Demonstrators gathered outside Meta's Manhattan office Thursday, demanding the company take better precautions at protecting children. Emotional family members clutched photos of their children, saying young people are increasingly at risk of harm because of social media. Open letter calls for end to promoting dangerous content on social media About 45 families from the United States and the United Kingdom say they lost children to what they call "online harms." They delivered an open letter to Mark Zuckerberg signed by more than 10,000 people, including 18 safety organizations. They want the company to take greater action to protect kids. The letter calls on Meta to "end the algorithmic promotion of dangerous content to children under 18, including explicit and sexualizing content, racism and hate speech, content promoting disordered eating or self-harm, dangerous viral challenges, and content promoting drugs and alcohol." They also call for "purging known problematic adult accounts and not connecting them to kids, and upholding firewalls to prevent unknown adults from communicating with young users through direct messages." A Meta spokesperson released a statement that reads in part, "Teen accounts have built-in protections that limit who can contact teens and the content they see, and 94% of parents say these are helpful. We've also developed safety features to help prevent abuse, like warning teens when they're chatting to someone in another country." Meta also says it worked with the nonprofit Childhelp to launch an online safety curriculum to help middle school students recognize potential online harm. "It's not too late for today's children" Family members shared their stories and their pain. "Hey Meta, flashback to the darkest moments of my life when my 16-year-old son David died by suicide after he was cyber-bullied for months on your very own Instagram," one parent said. "After losing my son, Elijah, my only child, to fentanyl that he obtained from Snapchat, I realized other families have similar experiences," another parent said. "Stop looking the other way," one woman said. "It's too late for my son, Brett, but it's not too late for today's children. Do something," another parent said. If you or someone you know needs help, you can call or text 988 to speak with a trained, caring counselor 24 hours a day, seven days a week. You can also chat online with a counselor at
Los Angeles Times
12-04-2025
- Automotive
- Los Angeles Times
The Crowd: Coastal Orange County teems with activity this spring
A small band of people gathered on the corner of Bristol Street and Avenue of the Arts in Costa Mesa to protest the recent performance of the Israel Philharmonic at the Renée and Henry Segerstrom Concert Hall. While protests are as much a part of the American foundation as apple pie, driving past, I couldn't help but question the objective of standing in opposition to a philharmonic orchestra. Music, after all, is one of humankind's most enduring gifts unifying people across borders, throughout the ages. The concert, produced by the Philharmonic Society and sponsored in great part by the Henry T. and Elizabeth Segerstrom Foundation, was brilliant. Music director and conductor Lahov Shani led the orchestra in an inspirational program that began with a rousing performance of both the U.S. and Israeli national anthems. The 'Star-Spangled Banner' and 'Hatikvah' blended with explosive hope and promise. Max Bruch's 'Kol Nidrei' followed, heightening the emotional pull of the evening. Leonard Bernstein's 'Halil' and then Tchaikovsky's 'Symphony No 6 in B Minor' capped the evening concert that ended in multiple standing ovations, and then an encore. A special nod to principal cellist Haran Meltzer. The Packard International Motor Car Club will bring its most elegant and historic display of what many auto collectors and historians consider the finest American cars ever built to a show at the Hyatt Regency Hotel, Newport Beach, Saturday, May 8, from 8 a.m. to noon. Upwards of 40 outstanding cars, Concours d'Elegance quality, dating from the 1920s to the 1950s, will be on display. The Packard Club is headquartered in Santa Ana and is a non-profit social organization dedicated to the preservation of these remarkable examples of automotive engineering and art. The event is free to the public. The Balboa Island Museum is planning its popular annual Memorial Day BBQ in the Park honoring local veterans. The museum, working with sponsors including the Balboa Island Improvement Association (BIIA), the Louis and Gladyse Foster Family Foundation, Rusty's Chips, 501 Park Avenue, and more, will produce the Monday, May 26 celebration at 115 Agate Ave., Newport Beach. Volunteers will serve your favorite barbecued burgers, dogs, SPAM and chili. Free to all vets; $15 for adults, $10 kids. To learn more visit The Newport Beach Country Club welcomes Childhelp's Rich Saul Memorial Golf Classic on April 28. The 13th anniversary outing is named for the late former Los Angeles Rams center Rich Saul. The Childhelp Classic is celebrating its 43rd year on the Orange Coast and will be co-chaired this season by Debra Violette and Catherine Caporaso. Eileen Saul, Rich Saul's widow, will act as tournament coordinator. Organizers expect to raise more than $600,000 benefiting the work of Childhelp in O.C., saving the lives of the most abused and neglected children in need. Platinum title sponsors of the golf tournament are Jacquie and Michael Casey, joining executive sponsors the O'Connell Family Foundation and the Cleo A. Bluth Family Charitable Foundation. To learn more, visit They are calling for 'All Hands on Deck!' Newport Sea Base will host its Good Sea Scout awardees Anne and John Wortmann on May 16 at a reception in support of youth involved in the various programs offered at Sea Base. More than 10,000 local youth participate in Sea Base marine-focused experiences annually. John Wortmann is a Newport Beach Commodore, and the chairman of the Board of Governors for Balboa Bay Club, among many other civic and charitable endeavors supported by both he and wife Anne, the Pasadena Rose Queen in 1976. For ticket information, sponsorship outreach and more, contact Elena Garcia at (714) 546-4990 x121 or April 5 marked Leo 'Marty' Schlocker's 100th birthday in Newport Beach, his home since 1964. The WWII Army veteran was an enlisted member of the 513th Parachute Infantry Regiment of the 17th Airborne Division attached to Gen. George Patton's Third Army. Wounded and captured by the German Army during the Battle of the Bulge, Schlocker discarded his dog tags that indicated his Jewish religion, fearing death, and was sent to Stalag 9B as a prisoner of war. Following his service, Schlocker returned to the U.S. and served 23 years with the Los Angeles Police Department, 25 years in the Army Reserve, and 30 years with the L.A. Airport Authority as superintendent of operations. A lifetime member of the Newport Beach Elks Lodge 1767, Schlocker joined his wife, Pamela, family and friends celebrating his 100th, and a lifetime of family, community and national service.
Fox News
05-04-2025
- Entertainment
- Fox News
‘Rocky' star Dolph Lundgren, wife Emma Krokdal soak up Miami sun after actor's years-long health battle
"Rocky" star Dolph Lundgren and wife Emma Krokdal were spotted soaking up the sun in Miami Beach after the actor's lengthy health battle. Lundgren, 67, and Krokdal, 29, were photographed enjoying a day at the beach during a stay at the luxury Faena Hotel. The action star, who revealed in November he was cancer-free after nine years of treatment and surgery, showed off his fit physique as he went shirtless in a pair of blue and white swim trunks. Lundgren sported a black watch and a silver chain. The "Expendables" star wore what appeared to be black kinesiology tape wrapped around his ankles. Krokdal put her trim figure on full display in a lavender-colored string bikini. The personal trainer accessorized with a pair of large tortoiseshell sunglasses, a belly button ring, beaded bracelets and gold hoop earrings. The pair carried white towels as they strolled along the shoreline before lying down to sunbathe. Lundgren was seen rearranging a lounge chair under a red and white umbrella while his wife relaxed in the chair next to him. The actor later wore a white polo shirt before the couple walked back to the hotel where they were seen beaming as they caught more rays. Lundgren and Krokdal, who announced their engagement in June 2020, tied the knot at their villa in Mykonos, Greece, in July 2023. The actor was previously married to jewelry designer Anette Qviberg, from 1994 to 2011. The former couple share daughters Ida, 28, and Greta, 23. In an Instagram post Lundgren posted Thursday, he shared that the couple had traveled to Miami to attend an event supporting the charitable organization Childhelp. "Their mission to prevent child abuse, is a cause very close to my heart and something I've experienced personally," he wrote of the nonprofit in the caption. "Every 10 seconds there's a report of child abused in the United States. Appreciate your help," Lundgren added, sharing a link to Childhelp's website. "Protect our children — our future," he added, tagging Childhelp's Instagram account. Lundgren has previously spoken out about being physically abused by his father while growing up in Sweden. The "Creed II" star's post included a trio of photos taken during their trip. In one image, Lundgren posed in a brown suit with a white dress shirt and white sneakers in the lobby of the Faena. Krokdal, who was wearing a white floral blouse with a sheer white layered skirt, joined him in another snap. The third photo featured Lundgren on stage as he received an award at Chidhelp's "Miracles in Miami" fundraiser. The pair's trip comes after Lundgren announced he had beaten the odds after being given two years to live at one point during his battle with cancer. In a November Instagram post shared from his hospital bed, Lundgren announced he was "finally cancer free with gratefulness and excitement for a bright future." In the video he posted, Lundgren said, "Here I am at UCLA. I'm about to go in and get rid of that last tumor. Since there are no cancer cells in my body anymore, I guess I'll be cancer-free, so I'm looking forward to this procedure." He explained he was undergoing lung ablation, a minimally invasive procedure that uses heating or cooling mechanisms to destroy tumor tissue, according to the Mayo Clinic. "It's been a rough ride and really taught me how to live in the moment and enjoy every moment of life. I mean, it's the only way to go," Lundgren said before heading into surgery. Lundgren was first diagnosed with cancer in 2015, when doctors found a tumor in his kidney. The doctors were able to remove the tumor, and he remained cancer-free for five years. During an interview on "In Depth With Graham Bensinger," he revealed doctors found a "few more tumors around the area" in 2020 and removed six additional tumors, but one had grown into the "size of a lemon" in his liver, and doctors were unable to remove it. "It wasn't looking good," he told Fox News Digital in January 2024. "I mean, there was a doctor in London who basically told me you should stop working and spend more time with your family. Then I realized it was serious." However, the "Universal Solider" star later learned his doctors were "giving me the wrong treatments because they hadn't really checked on all the biopsies." "I got a second opinion from a UCLA doctor, and she went back and looked at all the biopsies, and she said, 'Well, you know, this is a different mutation than what they said,'" Lundgren recalled. "They hadn't checked it. They just assumed. As soon as I got the new medication, I started getting better. And that was all [2022]. "And then last year, I removed all those tumors," Lundgren recalled. "They freeze them out or use radiation. And then, you know, now I'm living a normal life, I would say. Except I gotta go and do a scan every three months. But everything else is kind of back to normal. So, it was scary and magical at the same time."
