06-06-2025
Woman Gives Hilarious Math Lesson on Mom Libido ... and Angers Men
After a day spent cuddling, carrying, consoling, and serving as a human jungle gym, many mothers reach bedtime feeling 'touched out," physically and emotionally depleted from constant contact. Their partners often don't share that sensation. On average, men think about sex 19 times a day.
Recently, Maddie Muhs, who has two toddlers, did moms everywhere a service by breaking down the elusive formula behind maternal libido for their partners' benefit.
Here's the breakdown: (Hours of Sleep + Number of Real Meals Eaten While Seated) x Partner Support ÷ Number of Annoying Comments He Made — Number of Times Touched by Children = Mom Libido.
Muhs, a talent agent in Houston, Texas, walks through an example: If mom got eight hours of sleep and ate three full meals, and her partner handled both school pickup and bath time but irritated her twice, 'then we have to subtract the 1000 times that she was touched today,' Muhs explains. 'Does anyone know what the answer is?'
She delivers the verdict: 'Not an (expletive) chance.'
Muhs says her husband, Darren Schmidt, 42, had no notes, but teased that she was going to 'piss off a lot of men.'
'And I did,' she tells with a laugh.
Muhs says that the pressure to 'bounce back' after having a baby goes beyond losing weight or slipping into pre-pregnancy jeans. Women are also expected to be sexually available just as they were before.
Hormones also play a significant role for women. 'Am I ovulating? Am I in my luteal phase? What part of my cycle am I in? That affects our drive,' Muhs explains. "But male hormones are wired one way: It's always sex, sex, sex.'
The comments section on Muhs post quickly filled with messages from both women and men, with many of the latter suggesting that she's asking to be cheated on.
"Yes!!! I just sent this to my husband!"
"Don't get married and have kids if you refuse to meet your husband's needs. Definition of a trap right there. No love in your relationship."
"Women using this as an excuse to not have sex with their husband but also doesn't want their husband having sex with anyone else."
"breastfeeding minus 1,000,000."
"I have one little one, but when she is clingy, she is CLINGY and then here comes hubby wanting hugs and kisses and all the touches too…. Like can I please have my body back?!"
"I'm an engineer, I can confirm this formula is right."
"Forgot to minus the number of times children said 'mom.'"
"Divided by the number of minutes your husband sits on the toilet during the chaos that is dinner, bath time and bedtime routine. Maybe that would get them off the pot."
"You wanna be divorced?"
Muhs says she and Schmidt have open lines of communication, and he fully understands where she's coming from. 'Darren thought the video was really funny. After he watched it, he said, 'You actually missed a couple of (variables),'' she recalls. 'I'm lucky to be with someone who gets it!'"
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