Latest news with #Erratica
Time of India
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- Time of India
Coco-colonialism
Bachi Karkaria's Erratica and its cheeky sign-off character, Alec Smart, have had a growing league of followers since 1994 when the column began in the Metropolis on Saturday. It now appears on the Edit Page of the Times of India, every Thursday. It takes a sly dig at whatever has inflated political/celebrity egos, and got public knickers in a twist that week. It makes you chuckle, think and marvel at the elasticity of the English language. It is a shooting-from-the-lip advice column to the lovelorn and otherwise torn, telling them to stop cribbing and start living -- all in her her branded pithy, witty style. LESS ... MORE London is going nuts over 'nariyal' Oxford Street isn't yet redolent with aromas of simmering aviyal, albeit close enough. Goodbye, Coca-colonialism's. Hello, coco-colonialism. London is being blitzed by coconut milk, water, oil, fresh/desiccated/compacted kernel. From tabloid, tube and bus, I'm bombarded with ads ordering 'Convert to Coconut'. It isn't baptism by fiery kari, but by cool tetrapack. Downing packaged nariyal paani is not a patch on slurping from the real thing, even if easier to wield. It's already caught on among India's sipping classes. Here, the little blue and white cartons are drink du jour not only coz Britain – indeed all exited-from Europe – is in the throes of a throat (and grass)-parching Indian summer. It's a wider conquest. The unrelenting ad's baseline says, 'It's not a cult'. The udder distaste for milk from nature-intended sources led to such substitutes as soya, oat, almond, apple…Coconut conversion, however, goes beyond Veganism & Co. Its messaging cashes in on the greatest, latest massage: 'gut health'. This is the silver bullet; sure-fire seduction; certain path to nirvana, physical, mental, psychological, yea, even social. As always, We knew it first. Remember the ancient eastern wisdom of a healthy morning evacuation? Here, 'potty' is ensured via pot of 'Coconut Yog'. That's yoghurt, not Guruji Iyengar. The ad promises 'ALL YOUR PROBLEMS WILL BE SOLVED. If your problems are exclusively breakfast-based. Or dessert-based. Or curry-dollop-based. Or wanting-a-whole-coconut-in-each-pot-based.' Chicken tikka masala and king-sized samosa, ok, but no self-respecting desi visitor will cure home-food yearning with ersatz Ernakulam. Better to favour real curry, Mercifully this is no longer the pineapple-riddled atrocity once dished up in icky-sticky Bangladeshi dives. As a mark of my own upgrading, the only Bangladeshi I encountered was expertly shaking signature cocktails in a Portobello tapas bar – and called himself 'Jose'. Still, good to know that 'coconut' is now something more desirable than a WOG (Westernised Oriental Gentlemen) who was 'brown outside, white inside'. Even more satisfying is palms metaphorically swaying amidst oaks, more evidence of East and West mixing, and nixing colonial Mr Kipling. *** Alec Smart said: 'Tesla test-drives India.' Facebook Twitter Linkedin Email Disclaimer Views expressed above are the author's own.
Time of India
10-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Time of India
Water ways
Bachi Karkaria's Erratica and its cheeky sign-off character, Alec Smart, have had a growing league of followers since 1994 when the column began in the Metropolis on Saturday. It now appears on the Edit Page of the Times of India, every Thursday. It takes a sly dig at whatever has inflated political/celebrity egos, and got public knickers in a twist that week. It makes you chuckle, think and marvel at the elasticity of the English language. It is a shooting-from-the-lip advice column to the lovelorn and otherwise torn, telling them to stop cribbing and start living -- all in her her branded pithy, witty style. LESS ... MORE An exhibition to Thirst after Our 2018 TOI litfest and my recent volume for the tricentenary of Mumbai's mystical Parsi well were both titled Waternamah. This week I again immersed myself in the 'story of water'. 'Thirst' is the Wellcome Collection's latest London exhibition. Spread over Aridity, Rain, Glaciers, Surface Water and Ground Water, its historical artefacts, present-day videos and future scenarios show that freshwater is at the centre of a crisis that goes way beyond climate – indeed way back into antiquity. If WWIII was predicted to be over water, the oldest exhibit features the first recorded such war – a tablet on Sumerian epic, 'Gilgamesh and Aga' (composed around 2000 BC). King Aga enslaves the subjects of King Gilgamesh of Uruk to dig wells for his own city and, if refused, threatens to cut off Uruk's supply upstream on the Euphrates. Rivers have continued to be politicised by those who have the 'upper' hand. Unsurprisingly. Over 70 per cent of the earth's surface may be water but only three percent is fresh; two-thirds of it is locked in ice caps; and our cavalier disregard is perilously depleting what's available. Thirst isn't just physical. The text accompanying the first exhibit, Jeebesh Bagchi, Monica Narula and Shuddhabrata Sengupta/ Raqs Media Collective, tells us 'Across South Asian philosophy, the word is associated with craving, aspiration, longing and desire.' The exhibition keeps presenting their darker manifestation, shared loss, but also human resilience. All three coalesce in Gideon Mendel's wall-wide, ominously silent video, Deluge 2007-2024, looping images of people from five countries across continents struggling through waist-high waters. We see how nature strikes back, punishing human hubris in assuming divine rights to all Earth's resources. But nature sometimes benignly also gives back. We read how 'The Sinai peninsula saw unusual sustained rainfall during the pandemic after decades-long drought. Local wormwood, Artemisia Judaica flourished, and was found to treat the symptoms of the Covid variant, Omicron.' The same space showed how artist and wildcrafter Lofa Aziz introduced biomimicry, ethnobotany and citizen science to Bedouin youth who already had deep generational knowledge of their land, giving them new agency in preserving natural heritage. Our own efforts to save the Ganga could take heart from the 'sacred activism' ritual at the source of Beirut River last year. Individual fragile threads were braided into a strong 'prayer belt', symbolising the power-infused connection between individuals, communities and nature. Dare one hope that our own fragile Ganga-Jamuna culture could be thus revived? Indeed, 'Thirst' resonated with me in so many ways. The Raqs trio presenting third-century stepwells of Rajasthan and Delhi, 'their watermarks inscribing a history of thirst …carrying a memory of each step taken in search of freshwater'. Didn't it also etch the feminization of poverty? Like rivers flowing into a common ocean, we are bound in the global commonality of urban discord over water. In my first years in Bombay, in TOI's evening paper, 'Fight at Common Tap' vied only with 'Pydhonie Panwalla Stabs Paramour'. It's not very different today, even in parts where exorbitant tankers replace fractious faucet. Why, only India? The very day I visited 'Thirst', a London tabloid Phew!ed over the city being spared prolonged water shut-offs in 2027 thanks to last-minute funds for a reservoir. Not just with omnipresent monsoon waterlogging. Every coastal city can connect with the Malaysian fisherfolk despairing over catch-rich mangroves dying from the pollutants spewed by a nearby Chinese factory. Move over, mosquitoes. Humans are the vectors of water-related killers jeopardising not only our own existence but all life on the planet. 'Thirst' advises a strong gulp of restraint. *** Alec Smart said: 'Preamble says 'sovereign, socialist, secular'. How about 'sacrosanct'?' Facebook Twitter Linkedin Email Disclaimer Views expressed above are the author's own.
Time of India
02-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Time of India
YourTube, MyTube
Bachi Karkaria's Erratica and its cheeky sign-off character, Alec Smart, have had a growing league of followers since 1994 when the column began in the Metropolis on Saturday. It now appears on the Edit Page of the Times of India, every Thursday. It takes a sly dig at whatever has inflated political/celebrity egos, and got public knickers in a twist that week. It makes you chuckle, think and marvel at the elasticity of the English language. It is a shooting-from-the-lip advice column to the lovelorn and otherwise torn, telling them to stop cribbing and start living -- all in her her branded pithy, witty style. LESS ... MORE Ticket to ride on the London Metro If Underground movements are your cuppa tea – or Matcha Latte – hop aboard. 'Mind the Gap between the train and the platform. This is the Jubilee Line to Stratford.' The canned announcer keeps up her reminder on every route and imminent stop. Try not to stare. The London Underground gives you a seatside view of Britain's multicultural reality. Plus summer tourist tsunami. In addition to surroundscape of the world's ethnicities, skin shades, body shapes, hair types, you get a Babel-grade surroundsound. TS Eliot updated to: 'In the compartment, women come and go, talking a polyglot lingo.' And, like across Britain, you are never 'far from the madding crowd' of Hardy local accents. As un-understandable. 'This is the Bakerloo Line to Elephant and Castle.' Try not to stare. Aided and abetted by current heatwave, less is more than an eyeful. Forget your Eng Lit (Hons) Keats, Shelley and whatever their words were worth. Barely-there shorts and tops have long been the 'cuckoo call of Spring'. Have a lark discreetly observing buttered skin on toasted legs. Or, more kosher-ly, marvel at the sartorial variety. Techie casual, banker formal, tourist classic to unclassifiable. Eliot again, 'Mornings, evenings, afternoons, I have measured out my train life in much more than Tee-spoons. Don't stare. Read your phone or free copy of 'Metro'. Or compartment ads for youthful cheeks and mature cheese. Or a pithy gem from Poems on the Underground. Or Transport For London's omnipresent safety signs, 'See It, Say It, Sorted' for suspicious movement, and the '61016' text to report sexual harassment. Or simply the caution to 'Carry water in hot weather.' 'This is the Circle Line via Tower Hill. The next stop is Sloane Square'. But no '90s Sloaney sashays aboard. Only tired Mum struggling with perambulator. Or tired tourist struggling with suitcase coz next stop is rail junction Victoria. Never seen is tired cliché of bowler-hatted toff with tightly furled brolly and copy of FT. Though, in this Ascot season, plenty of women in fancy frocks and fancier hats/ ascinators teetering on 'the District Line to Richmond' en route to National Rail. Mostly it's Eastbound, Westbound. 'Change here for the Whatever Line to Royal Albert Hall/ Museums/ Monument/Heathrow. The Underground is a spoked hub. Not 'Way Out', but way towards. As in 'Xanadu' (Coleridge poem not Newton-John song), we move 'Through caverns measureless to man,/ Down to' Platform 1/2/3/4. And await the resounding roar which will finally take us to the 'pleasure dome that Kubla Khan aka Lonely Planet did decree'. Or to an enticing business-op. Or, best of all, a catch-up with old friends. *** Alec Smart said: 'In political football, it's 'Bend it Like Hindi'.' Facebook Twitter Linkedin Email Disclaimer Views expressed above are the author's own.
Time of India
25-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Time of India
We are the world
Bachi Karkaria's Erratica and its cheeky sign-off character, Alec Smart, have had a growing league of followers since 1994 when the column began in the Metropolis on Saturday. It now appears on the Edit Page of the Times of India, every Thursday. It takes a sly dig at whatever has inflated political/celebrity egos, and got public knickers in a twist that week. It makes you chuckle, think and marvel at the elasticity of the English language. It is a shooting-from-the-lip advice column to the lovelorn and otherwise torn, telling them to stop cribbing and start living -- all in her her branded pithy, witty style. LESS ... MORE And like that only everywhere If you want to feel homesick, don't travel. Means, I'm not saying, 'Why you want to travel? Simply stay home, no.' Opposite I'm saying: 'Go, go, travel, travel.' Kyon ki, everywhere we are meeting Indians. Making us think, 'Arrey, I'm in India only. Plus, enjoying Western-bestern things too.' It has been like that only for me this past fortnight. Last Saturday, I felt particularly at home. Intrigued, I'd gone to see Marriage Material at the Lyric theatre in Hammersmith. It was based on award-winning Brit journo Sathnam Sanghera's book and centred on the Bains family's Wolverhampton corner shop. The Iqbal Khan/Gurpreet Kaur Bhatti adaptation itself sounded shop-worn. My bad, coz I couldn't keep up with the impenetrable Wolverhampton accent? Nope. My v. Brit companion assured me that not many in the local-desi audience could have understood all of it either. Ah, the audience. It certainly wasn't the garden party-throwing, yacht-owning, millions-owing, Mallya-fide malai-layer of uppity desis. This one was like a raucous Patiala-Patel gathering. The Mums still spoke with Indian accents and dressed in tacky Colaba/Janpath. The younger lot dressed and spoke London. That accent is certainly not English as she is spoke (affected) in India's hangover Delhi clubs; in Calcutta, which has its own Oxbridge-Bong'; and by a certain gentleman whom it fits to a T. Saturday's middle-class Mummy-Papa may have also felt more comfy in no-frills Lyric than in intimidating West End icons. No Royal Box here. So non-stratospheric ticket prices. But then no air-conditioning – on a heatwave weekend. Mercifully there were no cell-phone detonations during the play. Nor even the crackle of crisps. But gent in next seat and poly sweaTee kept up a steady rustle, delving noisily into his backpack, looking for some lost treasure of Tutankhana. His Mrs occasionally dug in too, crackling away in counterpoint. During intermission the hall filled with boisterous Inglish-vinglish exchanges – and aromas. Is that a lamb samosa I see before me? Out damned greasy spot. I'm not wanting to eat you only. Too hot, no? *** Alec Smart said: 'Sahib Trump and 'Bibi', but Iran's no Ghulam.' Facebook Twitter Linkedin Email Disclaimer Views expressed above are the author's own.
Time of India
15-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Time of India
A Thursday
Bachi Karkaria's Erratica and its cheeky sign-off character, Alec Smart, have had a growing league of followers since 1994 when the column began in the Metropolis on Saturday. It now appears on the Edit Page of the Times of India, every Thursday. It takes a sly dig at whatever has inflated political/celebrity egos, and got public knickers in a twist that week. It makes you chuckle, think and marvel at the elasticity of the English language. It is a shooting-from-the-lip advice column to the lovelorn and otherwise torn, telling them to stop cribbing and start living -- all in her her branded pithy, witty style. LESS ... MORE So much more crashes along with a plane A dear friend perished in the Ahmedabad Indian Airlines plane crash of 1988; our domestic carrier still hadn't merged with Air India. No remains of his body were found and his wife lived with a hope she could never bring herself to bury. That flight had originated in Bombay so there would have been more whom I could have lost, and thankfully didn't. But Ahmedabad was my town-in-law, I still have close family there and closer friends. Any of them could have been on board AI 171 last Thursday. To date I know only of one. She missed her flight that morning; her not being on time turning to timeless – and incredulous – gratitude. And perhaps not a little mixed feelings thinking of those who did not get away. What then about Viswashkumar Ramesh? I have often pondered over what it must feel like to be the sole survivor of a tragedy that kills hundreds? Or, worse, the rest of your family? I've been so haunted by this sudden death because it struck in a place I love for many reasons, most of all for its contradictions. No city can be one-dimensional; but Ahmedabad is defined by its dichotomy. The resident deity is Rokda, cash, mounted on dhandho, business, but it is equally home to the most vaunted of IIMs, schools of architecture, design and dance, to so many litterateurs and artists. Aspiration is the common factor, the desire to make life better. Yes, it was also on board that Dreamliner which turned into nightmare. An Ahmedabad-London flight represents the vast percentage of Gujaratis who straddle both places. Those who went to Britain to improve their circumstances or their families going to visit. Or, in the case of software engineer Prateek Joshi, bringing his family to live there with him after six years of struggling for clearances. The one image I can't get out of my head is that of the selfie he posted just before take-off. His own mission-accomplished glow, his beaming wife, his three little kids smiling with yet-not-fully-grasped hope but with definite joy of finally being full-time with Papa. All vapourised in 30 seconds. A one-way ticket as Prateek Joshi never intended it to be. *** Alec Smart said: 'Accident compensation is a contradiction in terms.' Facebook Twitter Linkedin Email Disclaimer Views expressed above are the author's own.
