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USA Today
14-07-2025
- Entertainment
- USA Today
Dirty Water hard seltzer is disjointed, weird and ... kinda nice?
So we've got a weird one today. The drink up for review is Dirty Water, a 4.5 percent alcohol by volume (ABV) seltzer that clocks in at 90 calories and only comes in one flavor. I grew up in New England, which means "dirty water" refers to Boston's Charles River and Red Sox wins of varying importance. So it's a little weird to see a hard seltzer with the name that proudly hails from New York City -- home to all the best salsas and Boston's nemesis. But hey, the can has cool old school graphics and comes in a rare regular fit design instead of seltzer's typical slim fit. I'm on board. Let's see how it tastes. Dirty Water: C+ It pours clear with moderate carbonation -- honestly, that's fewer bubbles than I expected. The smell off the top is generic alcohol (seems like vodka) and just a hint of citrus sweetness. It's nicer than it sounds, but still at least a liitttttle sketchy. That weirdness persists. The first sip is sweet and mildly boozy. Not in a way that burns, but in a way that makes it clear this isn't a Sprite or seltzer. The minimal carbonation leaves a bit of a lingering aftertaste that kinda feels like vodka Fruit Stripe gum. This isn't my favorite, but it's also not bad. Dirty Water is operating on a curve. It delivers more alcohol (4.5 percent by volume) than a light beer with fewer calories (90). That could have left it trapped in the realm of pointlessness like Bluebird Hardwater. Instead it has a definite thesis. Booze and a little citrus/pear sweetness. At the same time, it feels like there's room for improvement. I'm sipping mine close to the best by: date, so it's possible this is a me problem -- but I feel crisper carbonation would be a boon here. I find La Croix remarkably pointless, but I do feel like leaning harder into that "seltzer" amount of bubbles would be a quick fix. It's weird. I think I like it, but it's weird. The mild fruit sweetness and overall flavor profile reminds me of fortune cookie gum, which is a sentence that makes no sense but that's kinda Dirty Water's whole vibe. It's a New York City seltzer that shares a name with a song that celebrates Boston. Strange, but fine. That's where I landed. Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's? This a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I'm drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That's the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm's. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink Dirty Water over a cold can of Hamm's? No. Dirty Water is a nice cool down drink, but I don't think I could handle it in my regular rotation. This is part of FTW's Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.


USA Today
09-07-2025
- Entertainment
- USA Today
Mutiny Island's smoked hot pepper vodka is perfect Bloody Mary fodder
Vodka's strength is its versatility. There's no spirit out there with more flavor variations than eastern Europe's drink of choice. Brands like Pinnacle and Burnett's have stocked their portfolios with wild variants ranging from the logical and flexible (orange) to the absurd and limited (pumpkin pie). The bulk of these flavored vodkas are, uh, not especially well received. No shade there on my end; there's a place for everything and whipped cream vodka has browned out more of my nights than I'd care to admit. That leaves room for a higher plane of flavored spirits out there. I'm not sure Mutiny Island, made from breadfruit and Caribbean rainwater down in St. Croix and clocking in at $27 per fifth, fits that bill based on composition -- but if it tastes great, it might get there on quality alone. But, admittedly, I don't want a sipping vodka. I want a vodka I can mix easily in my favorite drinks. A smoked hot pepper vodka? Heck yeah, sounds perfect for a bloody Mary (even if I just learned the beautiful ways of the Caesar up in Canada). Let's see how it works there. Mutiny Island smoked hot pepper vodka in a bloody Mary with Zing Zang: A- The most obvious place for spicy vodka is in a bloody Mary. I'm a bit shorthanded this time around, so let's get this out of the way. My garnish game? Terrible, especially for someone in Wisconsin. I didn't even have a pickle spear to drop into the mug; just little gherkins. I started with my typical base -- a little pepper, Worcestershire sauce and pickle juice -- before adding vodka and Zing Zang. The vodka smells as advertised; spicy and smoky with a lingering, cutting current of alcohol underneath. I'd normally slop it up with a healthy dose of hot sauce (the one place where Tabasco still reigns supreme), but I want to know how spicy Mutiny Island can make my bloody on its own. The answer is appropriately so -- maybe not as hot as I wanted, but there's a nice lingering heat that sticks to your tongue. It's savory and satisfying and, despite a liberal pour, not boozy-burny but spicy-burny. I kinda wish I had some cheese cubes and a beef stick as a garnish, because those would taste awesome after soaking in this cocktail. While I'd like a little more spice, I really do appreciate the lingering flavor at the end of each sip. This is a balanced, proper bloody that's easy to come back to, and I'm slightly disappointed I'm not hungover to see how quickly I could get this into my bloodstream to revive me (and, potentially, prolong said hangover). For a hot pepper vodka, it's pleasantly restrained. It's gonna be my go-to bloody Mary vodka for a while. Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's? This a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I'm drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That's the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm's. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink Mutiny Island's smoked hot pepper vodka over a cold can of Hamm's? I drank it with Hamm's as my beer back. I highly recommend it. This is part of FTW's Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.


USA Today
19-06-2025
- Business
- USA Today
SweetWater's Day Trip IPA is fine, but a little boring
SweetWater's Day Trip IPA is fine, but a little boring SweetWater was one of the first craft breweries readily available to me as a broke graduate student. By virtue of countless $2.50 420s and Blues, the Atlanta-based beermaker -- bought out by a Canadian concern in 2020 -- has spent most of the last two decades inside my circle of trust. Some of the recent returns have been uneven. The company's Gummies line of fruity, heavy pale ales was hit-and-miss. And maybe it's because I'm up in Wisconsin now, but the Blue doesn't hit the same way it once did (though it's still a solid Atlanta airport beer). Even so, SweetWater remains a brand I seek out. Or, at least, a brand I'm comfortable shrugging toward and grabbing a six pack of once overwhelmed at my local Woodman's. Thus enters Day Trip IPA to my life. SweetWater, as a consequence of being born in the late 1990s, is well versed in pale ales. Let's see how this one turns out. Day Trip IPA: B- Cracking the can unleashes a wave of bitter hops backed by some slightly sour malt. It's clear from the get-go that this isn't a hazy New England ale or West Coast joint. It's a throwback to the salad days of the late 00s where tongue-burning pale ales were the staple that invited all the new local microbreweries into the pool. Fortunately, the first sip is milder than the abrasive smell suggests. This isn't a face-melter IPA. It's got some softness to it thanks to that heavier-than-expected malt load. It does clock in bitter, but it's not going to tie you into knots with a big IBU count. Instead, those hops turn the volume up toward the end to temper things and remind you what we were all drinking 15 years ago. That rounds off each sip, which isn't the dry finish I'd prefer but one I can live with. You're getting a bit of a journey here, from some lemon citrus up front to that hoppy conclusion. It may work better with more carbonation -- there was a bit of a flat feeling to my can, even a month-plus before its best by date -- but as is it's a totally fine, upper-middle class pale ale. That's nice. Not nice enough to stand out in a crowded field or even with SweetWater's best stuff. But, nice. Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's? This a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I'm drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That's the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm's. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink SweetWater's Day Trip IPA over a cold can of Hamm's? I'd mix one in here and there. Day Trip is a totally fine pale ale and one you won't regret plucking out of a cooler. But it's also probably not one you'll actively seek out. This is part of FTW's Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.


Los Angeles Times
09-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Los Angeles Times
Your ‘Interview With the Vampire' tattoos humble (and horrify) showrunner Rolin Jones
Be who you want to be and be that thing for all eternity. Be everything you want to be and be that thing for all eternity. Be all the beautiful things you are and be them without apology, for all eternity. These are three iterations of the same line from various drafts of the pilot episode for AMC's 'Anne Rice's Interview With the Vampire.' And there's probably a perfectly fine 800-word essay one could write about the little journey Anne's desperate line of seduction made along its way to television immortality. Except Anne Rice didn't write that particular line of 'Anne Rice's Interview With the Vampire.' I did. And were you going to just blow past the words 'television immortality' and move on to the next sentence? 'Cause, yeah, that's quite the boast coming from a writer who almost certainly got this gig because Mike White or Quinta Brunson turned it down. Well, it's a fact. And I know it's a fact, because recently, while dragging my knuckles through writing Season 3 of this same show, it was brought to my attention that several people sharing our planet have tattooed the third iteration of that line onto their bodies. And this is the weirdness I'd like to share with you today. My first reaction to seeing internet photos of the physical evidence was, 'Well, that must be fake.' When I saw a second photo of the line on a second body (different body part, more modern font), I heard myself mutter, 'Oh, dear.' I followed that quickly with a performative 'why' and twice a week ever since, when I remember these horrors have occurred, I stop what I'm doing and consider tracking down these souls and offering them money for ink-removal sessions. In these reveries, I tell Those Who Have Been Inked my concerns. I tell them about the guy I once saw at Casey's Tavern in Woodland Hills with a Where's the Beef tattoo. How friendless he seemed nursing his can of Hamm's underneath the No Swearing reminder. I tell them to consider the inevitable moment many years from now (after the robots have enslaved us all) when they are staring at their betraying flesh in the bathroom mirror, deciphering the lateral backward words, 'Be all the beautiful things you are and be them without apology, for all eternity' and shouting back, 'I DID! AND LOOK WHAT F— HAPPENED!' The reveries always end poorly, usually with me shouting something like 'Your body is a miracle!' and their owner robot escorting me off its property. Speaking of robots, when you type the line B.A.T.B.T.Y.A. (451 words so far, people), Google's Generative AI search spits this out. 'The phrase is often attributed to the character Lestat de Lioncourt from the Anne Rice's 'Interview With the Vampire.'' The grammar-challenged robot continues: 'The phrase resonates because it speaks to the universal human desire for authenticity and self-acceptance. It suggests that true beauty comes not from conformity or striving to be someone else, but from embracing one's own unique essences, even it's imperfect or unconventional.' Really? I wrote it and I'm not sure I believe all that. Of course, I'm what the biz calls one of those 'given-circumstance hacks.' And when I think back to the salad days of COVID-19, when I was massaging the line, I think I was mostly trying to figure out how vampire Lestat de Lioncourt could get himself out of the two-murdered-priests hole he had dug himself in with the mortal Louis de Pointe Du Lac. Make him feel seen. The kids love that sentiment. Oh yeah, maybe cast a very attractive Australian with a voice that sounds like what a Hästens mattress would sound like. Just get it to Episode 2. No one's tattooing this on their body. Except they did. And as I type (655 words in, you're almost there, stay strong), I have now seen three separate tattoo photos with this line of text inked on flesh along with several other photos of different lines or images from our show on other parental-saddening torsos. And yeah, it fills me with horror. But it's also quite humbling. These beautifully unwell fans we have, they've taken the thing we wrote (from Anne's lovely novels) and made it a permanent part of their lives. They carry the words with them wherever they go. These are generally young people doing this. And more than the horror or the humility, or the primal fear of servitude to robot overlords, they remind me of when I was young. When I loved things with that kind of intensity. Mike and Quinta, enjoy your Emmys. I have two arms and a thigh.


USA Today
23-05-2025
- Sport
- USA Today
Breckenridge's Spring Forward IPA is a throwback. It's a toss up whether that's good
Breckenridge's Spring Forward IPA is a throwback. It's a toss up whether that's good Welcome back to FTW's Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey. Breckenridge feels like it's always been there. Maybe not with the cache of a Sam Adams or a Sierra Nevada, but lurking on the shelves of your local bottle shop since you hit drinking age. The brewer has, in fact, only been around since 1990. Which, sources tell me is 35 years ago and... good god. My own existential crisis aside, it seemed to embody the rising tide of craft brewing in that era. It made interesting beers outside the lagers that dominated America's macrobreweries. It had funky packaging and art. It came from the exotic land of Colorado, home of John Elway and neon ski pants. What wasn't to like? Despite all these positives, it never seemed to break through the way its peers did. Even now, as part of a national conglomerate (Tilray), Breckenridge feels more like the Errict Rhett in a league of Emmitt Smiths. Now that I've appropriately remembered a guy -- not an insult! Rhett was good! For the time! -- let's take a look at Breckenridge's new spring seasonal. Spring Forward Grapefruit IPA: C+ It pours with a little less carbonation than expected, but still leaves a quarter inch head that lingers well after the bottle has emptied. The smell off the top is split between resin-y hops and grapefruit. Together it's a little rough, but also appealing in a "oh, so this could be interesting" kind of way. The first sip is more bitter than expected for a spring beer. The hops are tart but not especially juicy or danky. That puts a lot of the lift onto the grapefruit, which gets it about halfway up before running out of gas. The citrus lingers in the aftertaste and does mellow out that bitter hop taste, but the overall impression feels like a throwback to the early days of IPAs. Except, you know, with fruit. It's a little underwhelming and surprisingly... divisive? for a national craft brewer like Breckenridge. Which, honestly, makes me respect the effort a little more. There's a certain crispness that I appreciate. But the IPA of it all is a little simple and single note. You can do better. Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's? This a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I'm drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That's the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm's. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink Breckenridge's Spring Forward IPA over a cold can of Hamm's? It's a totally fine pale ale. I'll stick with the Hamm's, though.