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The Print
06-07-2025
- General
- The Print
Success to failure, UPSC is a family affair
But what is not celebrated is the silent effort of an entire support system—a quiet, unpaid workforce made up of family members, friends, and partners. After all, aspirants live, for lack of a better description, a suspended life built on the edifice of junoon (passion) and self-doubt. But sometimes, it all comes together. The result is announced, and the aspirant's name appears on the list. Those who succeed are elevated to near-mythical status. Their photos decorate newspaper pages and coaching centre hoardings, and they are invited for felicitations and motivational talks. A couplet by Mirza Ghalib could well serve as the unofficial motto of UPSC aspirants: Ragon mein daudte phirne ke ham nahin qayal; jab aankh hi se na tapka to phir lahu kya hai— I'm not impressed by blood that runs in the veins; if it doesn't spill from the eyes, what kind of blood is it? A family that aspires together… It has been said that it takes a village to raise a child. Cliched but true. The same holds for success in the UPSC exam. If UPSC is the Everest of Indian competitive exams, and the topper is the climber, then their family members are the sherpas who make the ascent possible. The mother, often a school dropout herself, becomes the planner. Relatives are told not to visit, and the TV volume is turned down. The father, already exhausted by the demands of underpaid work, becomes proficient in the mechanics of prelims, mains, optional, DAF (detailed application form), and ethics papers. Siblings absorb any and all friction in silence. Affection is expressed not through words but by consoling oneself: 'Let him focus, we will manage.' A natural question arises: why do families do this for an exam where the acceptance rate is lower than that of Harvard? The ideal of public service and giving back to society is sine qua non, but sometimes it is only a necessary condition, not a sufficient one. First, the dream of cracking the UPSC is one that originates in the family, not the aspirant. A good score in Class 12. A local officer who is feted like royalty. A personal experience with socio-economic dysfunction. All these experiences (and more) plant the seed. 'Ladke ko IAS/IPS banana hai'. Whether the child is a doctor or an engineer, the end goal remains the same: to make them a Collector or SP sahab. Second, the fragility of the Indian middle class, especially in small towns and peri-urban India. This class, often first-generation salaried or self-employed, is perched precariously between two possibilities—either remain stuck in the bog of social anonymity, or achieve an almost unprecedented moment of social reordering. An officer in the family changes the way you are respected at weddings and in society. It symbolises entry into the system. Third, UPSC is a hedge against chaos. Chaos of what kind? Private sector job layoffs and the inherent risks built into entrepreneurship. And so, the family stakes everything on the UPSC exam. Also Read: You're wrong about UPSC aspirants. I just got Rank 150 and it's not about money & power The unseen work of women What often goes unseen and unspoken is how the exam preparation ecosystem relies heavily on the labour of women. For male aspirants, their emotional and logistical needs are met by the women around them. It is usually the mother who absorbs the increased domestic workload and tantrums. The sister who takes up an extra tutoring job to ease the financial burden. The partner who becomes the cheerleader and sounding board, without knowing if she will even be part of the future being chased. She watches the aspirant spiral after poor results and walks on eggshells, not because he asks her to, but because she knows that one wrong step might rupture their bond. And what about the female aspirants? 'Shaadi kab karegi' (When will you get married?) becomes a common refrain. Fathers have to weather relatives' jibes and neighbours' questions about their aspirant daughter's advancing age. A 27-year-old man preparing for his next attempt is seen as 'hard-working', but a 27-year-old woman doing the same is termed 'delusional' or as being 'unrealistic'. While chasing her dream, she quickly learns that agency comes at a price and that society charges women interest. So while both men and women struggle, these complex gendered dynamics are rarely acknowledged, and often brushed under the carpet by Indian society. The aftermath of failure Mostly, the aspirant crosses the age limit or exhausts his attempts, and thus his journey ends in a PDF that does not contain his name. Usually, one of two things happens. In the first case, people around the aspirant adjust without recrimination. The father who says, 'Koi baat nahi, naukri mil jayegi' (Never mind, you'll get a job), even when his eyes brim with years of unpaid sacrifice. The mother who pretends she always wanted her son to go into the corporate sector anyway. The friend or partner who says, 'Tune try toh kara, wohi bahut hai' (You tried, it's enough). But sometimes, those around the aspirant let deflating disappointment curdle into rancid bitterness. The aspirant is branded with pejoratives like nikamma, nakara—a good-for-nothing wastrel. Friends and partners distance themselves emotionally. The aspirant, unless he has steel flowing through his veins, succumbs to a life of self-pity and chasing validation. It is tragic, but also very real. Undoubtedly, the greater dignity lies with the former—the families and friends who endure and sustain, rather than deflect and blame. There is a strange, stoic heroism to it. As Kipling said: 'If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster, and treat those two impostors just the same… then yours is the Earth and everything that's in it.' Also Read: A blacksmith's son's grind to a new mom taking the exam 17 days postpartum—UPSC candidates' journeys Credit where it's due This article is not a call to stop celebrating toppers, but a call to recognise what success actually costs and who pays for it. Behind every name in the final PDF, there are often three or four people who made innumerable sacrifices, both big and small, for that result. If we must romanticise the journey of a topper, let us at least be honest about what it truly takes. It is time we gave due credit not just to those who earn the All India Ranks (AIRs), but to those who stood by them and kept the aspirant afloat, in sorrow and in happiness. Pranav Jain will soon join the civil services and is also a columnist. Views are personal. (Edited by Asavari Singh)
NDTV
02-07-2025
- Politics
- NDTV
Goondaism To Corruption, 'Mango' Mishra Is All That's Wrong With Bengal
" Kalkatte ka jo zikr kiya tune hum nasheen; ik teer mere seenay mein mara kay haye haye," wrote Mirza Ghalib, recounting the lost time he spent in the City of Joy. For some like me, who once lived in Kolkata, these lines bring back memories of not just a lost time, but a lost city. In the early 2000s, Kolkata was a city of dreams for many like me who grew up in small towns in eastern and Northeastern India. For us, it was our first brush with the metropolis. No, Kolkata was not an IT hub, nor was it as 'happening' as Mumbai or Delhi. But it had something few other cities did. In Kolkata, knowledge was currency. You could show up in college in a shabby kurta and tattered jeans, but you would be respected if you could analyse Hamlet or critique Communism. The hallowed corridors of Presidency College, where I was fortunate enough to study, would be abuzz all day long with music, heated political debates, and discussions on what was happening in Kolkata and beyond. Was it all good? Not at all. Incidents of violence marred college elections, and on many occasions, top student leaders were accused of sexual harassment and intimidation. I must also add the disclaimer: it was an era pre-social media, and many cases may not have come to light. But from what we know, there was a difference in what a college neta could get away with. There was a difference in the aspirations of such netas, too. Several key student leaders from those years have pursued careers in politics. Others have taken up jobs in the media, academia and other fields. The Rise Of The 'Campus Don' Cut to 2025, Monojit Mishra, a Trinamool student leader, is accused of raping a student on campus. His co-accused, Zaib Ahmed and Pramit Mukhopadhyay, are accused of recording the heinous act to blackmail the survivor later. The crime occurred after college hours in a room that the security guard used. The investigation has revealed the extent of Mishra's access and his influence on campus. Here is an alumnus who completed his law course in 2022. Instead of working as a lawyer, he returns to campus as a contractual staff with a meagre daily pay of Rs 500. The question is, why? While a possible reason could be that he was just addicted to the power he enjoyed on campus, several reports have claimed that Mishra was running an admission 'syndicate' and took bribes to ensure admissions to the college. So, a priest's son who became a lawyer bunks the courtroom, takes on a handout job, and aims to make money through admission bribes. This is not just corruption, it is rot, a death of hope in a city that continues to flatter itself by saying, "What Bengal thinks today, India thinks tomorrow." It reflects a fundamental shift from being a society that once prided itself on knowledge, to one in which being a political party's henchman appears to be a more attractive option than being a lawyer. A Deeper Rot And why is that? White-collar job opportunities in Kolkata have dried up. Many blame the work culture, and others point to lower pay. Anyone who can leave for Delhi, Mumbai, Bengaluru, or abroad, moves out. But those who can't must make do. This is where corruption comes in. Allegations of corruption have come up in every aspect of public life in Bengal and Kolkata, be it education, jobs, public projects, or something as basic as parking. 'Cut-money', an expression used to refer to an illegal commission charged by ruling party leaders, is so pervasive that even Chief Minister Mamata Banerjee has, in the past, warned party leaders to return the 'cut'. The nation got a glimpse of how deep-rooted the corruption in Bengal is when over 25,000 teachers lost their jobs after large-scale corruption in a 2016 recruitment exercise, with the Supreme Court noting that the selection process had been "tainted beyond resolution", and directed the state government to repeat the process. How To Get Away With Everything, Almost The Kolkata rape accused, reports have said, charged as much as Rs 2 lakh to ensure admission to the law college. So, a lawyer who would have had to struggle for years before building a reputation now has an easier option: use political connections to get a low-paying job on campus and exploit that position to make much more money through dubious means. The social implications of this are extremely damaging. A section of young students growing up in Kolkata now no longer aspires to study hard and get a good job. Cosying up to a local neta is a much easier and more rewarding option. Also, such connections virtually give you a free pass to commit crimes, like Monojit did for years, before his luck ran out. Political parties shielding criminals is not new, certainly not for the Trinamool. Sure, the Left Front, the 34-year rule of which is the Trinamool's go-to defence against every political attack, exercised its share of influence on campuses, with leaders of its students' wing often accused of intimidating political rivals. But the impunity enjoyed by their Trinamool counterparts today, as is seen in Monojit Mishra's case, would have surely made those Left honchos squirm in jealousy. Interestingly, after the RG Kar rape and murder case, Monojit had even shared 'hang the rapist' posts and took part in protests and demonstrations. That he is accused of a similar crime now shows the gulf between the real and the virtual. The Many Monojits Over the past few years, this student leader, called 'Mango' by his juniors, has been accused of ripping off a woman's clothes on campus, beating up a college guard and vandalising college property. And yet, he is appointed as a contractual employee in the same college. In most colleges in Bengal, student union elections have not been held for years. But the 'dadas' continue to hold power, have a flattering group of followers and lord this over campuses across the state. Those who stand up to them face the music; others wait for their course to end. Monojit is just one among many. Next year, Bengal will vote again. Trinamool will narrate another success story and blame all failures on the 34-year Left Front rule. The BJP would accuse Banerjee of appeasement and hope to gain from the polarisation. And, a decimated Left would point to crimes and corruption and try to regain some lost ground. Votes will be polled, counted, slogans will be raised, and victories will be celebrated. But will hope return to Bengal and Kolkata? The Siddharthas Are Done A section of 'Bhadralok' in the city abhors the BJP's Hindutva politics, believes that the Left does not stand a chance, and grudgingly sides with the "lesser evil", the Trinamool, which resurrects the "outsider" bogey ahead of every election. The question is, do we condone limitless corruption and lumpenism because we fear a communal shift or a return to the past? Does a 'secular' badge give a political party a free pass to loot taxpayers, turn students into criminals and destroy institutions? Monojit Mishra is not the disease; he is a symptom. In Satyajit Ray's Pratidwandi (1970), the protagonist, Siddhartha, who had to give up his medical studies due to his father's death, loses his cool during a job interview. His final act of aggression shows he no longer hopes to find a job in Kolkata and has nothing to lose. The film was made during the Naxalism years in Bengal, when thousands of bright students declared themselves enemies of the state and were killed in the brutal crackdown that followed. Five decades later, as Bengal's youth searches for hope in vain, one wonders about the future. Will the Siddharthas continue to leave because of the Monojits? Disclaimer: These are the personal opinions of the author
India.com
30-06-2025
- Entertainment
- India.com
This actress earned much more than many heroes, fell madly in love with Dev Anand but refused to become his wife, quit film industry at 34, she is…
Girls used to be desperate to get a glimpse of Hindi cinema superstar Dev Anand. Famous actresses of his era were crazy about Dev Anand. Both of them met on the sets of a film. That beautiful actress of the 40s-50s, who used to charge more than the hero of her time. This actress was so crazy in love with Dev Anand that she remained alone for him all her life. Once, Dev Anand even slapped this actress. Who is this actress whom Dev Anand slapped? The extremely beautiful actress we are talking about is none other than the talented actress of her time, Suraiya. Apart from being a superstar actress of her time, she was also a famous singer. Very few people know that before or along with Dev Anand, Dilip Kumar was also a fan of Suraiya's beauty and art. Suraiya never got associated with him in that way, but there was a lot of talk about this in the film industry. Both Dev and Dilip liked her. Dev Anand's chemistry with Suraiya Dev and Suraiya first met in 1948 when the film 'Vidya' was released. During the shooting of this film, the closeness between the two started increasing on the set. Seeing Suraiya's beauty and simplicity, Dev fell in love with her at first sight. When was Suraiya born? Suraiya was born on this day, i.e. on 15 June 1929. In 2004, when Suraiya said goodbye to this world at the age of 74, everyone expected that Dev Anand would definitely go to see her for the last time. But this did not happen and this love story ended. Why Suraiya's relationship didn't work with Dev Anand Suraiya's grandmother did not approve of her relationship with Dev Anand. She would not let Suraiya and Dev Anand unite and that is exactly what happened. Eventually, Dev Anand married Kalpana Kartik, but Suraiya remained a virgin throughout her life, in love with him. Dev Anand wanted to marry Suraiya. But Suraiya's grandmother was a villain between the two. Then both of them decided to do a court marriage. But Suraiya could not do a court marriage, and after explaining many times, Dev Anand even slapped her once. But later he realized his mistake and apologised to Suraiya. Suraiya was one of the highest-paid actresses of that era. She brought life to her characters in films like 'Anmol Ghadi', 'Mirza Ghalib', 'Phool' and 'Khoobsurat'. The actress who ruled the industry for more than 4 decades never found love.
Hindustan Times
12-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Hindustan Times
Delhiwale: Chai time with Joyce
Mirza Ghalib, Khushwant Singh, Maheshwar Dayal, Sir Syed Ahmed Khan, Ahmad Ali, H.C. Fanshawe , Quli Khan, H.K. Kaul, Percival Spear, RV Smith, Madhur Jaffrey, William Dalrymple, Sadia Dehlvi, James Joyce, Narayani Gupta, Manju Kapoor, Malvika Singh, Rana Dasgupta, Swapna Liddle, Rakhshanda Jalil, Rana Safvi, Sam Miller, Pushpesh Pant, Akhil Kaltyal, and Pradip Krishen, and so many others. They all happen to be writers, and all of them have something of Delhi in their oeuvre. The nit-picking fact-checkers might pick on one of these names, objecting that this writer has got nothing to do with Delhi. They have a point. Even so, no matter wherever you might walk in Delhi-NCR—Jacobpura in Gurugram, or Turrab Nagar in Ghaziabad — one book that comes in handy to crack our city most intimately is James Joyce's Ulysses. The celebrated novel mostly comprises of characters walking the streets of Dublin in Ireland. The city is mapped out with extreme precision. So much so that the book's Dublin has become universally relatable. The places and people in the novel resonate with places and people in the reader's own city. At one point in Ulysses, the hero remarks that it would be a good puzzle to cross Dublin without passing a single pub. A good puzzle will also be to cross Delhi without passing a single chai stall. Indeed, sometimes while strolling the galis around Turkman Gate, this reporter does confuse between the two cities. For you have to understand that the chatter and curses in the Dublin pubs and Dilli chaikhanas are the same! The crowds of men, the tobacco smoke. For instance, the 'applause and hisses' of Barney Kiernan's (in Ulysses's chapter 12) find their exact twins in Old Delhi's hyperlocal Kale Tea Stall, Irfan's tea stall, Babban's tea stall, Ashok's tea stall, and Rani's tea stall. What's more, the Martello Tower in apna Ansari Road is a twin of Dublin's Martello Tower, the iconic landmark where Joyce's novel starts. June 16 is falling on coming Monday. This is the date on which the entire Ulysses is set. The day is celebrated worldwide as Bloomsday, so named after its everyman hero Leopold Bloom. Indeed, the best way to mark Bloomsday in Delhi is to be at the Ansari Road Martello, and read aloud the novel's opening lines: 'Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead…' PS: This photo was clicked two years ago at Haveli Azam Khan's Modern Tea House, which recently shut.
Time of India
24-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Time of India
Bayan-e-Ghalib: Where poetry meets dance
Lucknow: The UP Sangeet Natak Akademi on Friday witnessed a mesmerising confluence of poetry, ghazal, and kathak during Bayan-e-Ghalib, a soulful event that brought the legendary poet's works to life through a unique theatrical presentation. Tired of too many ads? go ad free now The evening featured a compelling dual portrayal of Mirza Ghalib, with one artist reciting his immortal verses while another enacted the poet's journey to literary greatness. Dr Prabha Srivastava enriched the evening with soulful renditions of ghazals, while acclaimed dancer Kumkum Dhar added to the cultural spectacle by choreographing kathak performances to accompany the verses. The event drew appreciation from a diverse audience. "Although I am a doctor, I read Urdu poetry, and the whole act and dance performances were pure magic," said Dr Sneha Charan, 41, who attended the event. Scientist Namita Mehra praised the presentation as a perfect embodiment of Lucknow's cultural heritage, noting, "The combination of poetry, ghazal, and kathak perfectly captures the essence of Lucknow's culture and tehzeeb."
