Latest news with #Mumsnet
Yahoo
4 hours ago
- Yahoo
Woman Says She Has the ‘Ick' After Her Female Neighbor Brought Up Sex in Front of Her and Her Husband
A woman said she felt extremely uncomfortable after her husband and a female neighbor joked about sex in front of her The woman, who shared her story on a popular community forum, asked others how she should 'deal' with the situation The story sparked much debate among the woman's fellow community membersA woman said that her neighbor and husband recently put her in an uncomfortable situation, and she's now wondering how to 'deal' with it. The woman detailed her story on the 'Am I Being Unreasonable?' forum on the U.K.-based community site a place where women can go to seek advice from other women. In her post, the woman said that she and her husband have a neighbor who has been widowed for several years. She explained that they all 'generally get on very well,' exchanging Christmas cards and helping each other out when needed. However, the original poster (OP) went on to say that things recently got awkward while they were hanging out in her yard after a neighborhood barbeque. 'The three of us (me, [my husband], and neighbor) sat in the garden listening to music,' she said, adding, 'then came the bit that shocked me.' 'There was a brief conversation about a new local massage center that we thought was a bit dodgy,' she said, adding, 'Then, [the] neighbor volunteers that when she moved to the area with her former husband, she jokingly thought about setting up a fantasy style sex chat line.' She said that the neighbor then went 'into detail' about how she would have theoretically operated the business. The OP says she was caught off guard as their conversations had never previously strayed into 'personal sexual areas,' adding, 'I have only ever thought of her as a nice lady [around] my age.' The woman said that she was then 'mortified' when her husband chimed in that 'he'd use her phone line.' The PEOPLE Puzzler crossword is here! How quickly can you solve it? Play now! She said that she was 'very tired' that evening and so did not tell her husband how upset the encounter made her feel, but that she woke up the following morning 'thinking WTF happened last night and how do I deal with it?' The OP said that her husband has since told her to 'calm down,' as 'it was just a joke.' '[The] neighbor has invited us over for a BBQ," the woman said at the end of her post, adding, "How would you deal with this situation?' In a follow-up comment, the OP clarified that she was less concerned with the content of what the neighbor had said and was more bothered by the context in which it was said. 'If [the] neighbor had shared that with me while we were out one-on-one I would have reacted in a different way, and likely had a good laugh. But I don't understand why she would share something like that with a couple. Hubby reacted enthusiastically about hearing her naughty side. The whole situation has given me the ick,' she explained. A number of commenters said that they thought the OP was overreacting and that she should let the incident slide. 'You brought up massage parlors, OP. She didn't start talking about it out of nowhere. Don't overthink this and go to the BBQ,' said one person. 'What do you have to deal with? Just don't bring it up again if you don't want to talk about it,' added someone else. Another person said, 'I'd just think it was a joke. You're all grown adults … Why shouldn't she joke about sex?' Others, however, agreed that the neighbor crossed a line and said they thought the OP was well within her right to feel uncomfortable. Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. 'I would make it very clear to my husband he crossed the line, and I want him to have NOTHING to do with this neighbor at all. And certainly texting or speaking to her would be a big line crossed!' one person said, adding, 'She was testing the water and flirting with your husband in front of you, and instead of shutting it down, he encouraged it!!' 'You seem determined to blame her, but your husband was the one who took it from business plan to personal and sleazy. He massively disrespected you, not her,' said someone else. Read the original article on People
Yahoo
5 hours ago
- General
- Yahoo
Mom Is Left ‘Feeling Guilty' After Allowing Her Kids to Use Their Pocket Money to Pay for Family Day Out
A mother admitted that money is "always tight" a week before payday, regardless of how much she budgets for her family In a Mumsnet post, she said her children volunteered to use their pocket money to go on an outing together However, the mom was left feeling "guilty" after other parents commented about her making her children use their savingsA mother is feeling broken after her children publicly announced they used their pocket money to pay for a family day out. The mom explained in a lengthy Mumsnet post that money is 'always tight' by the end of the month, regardless of how much she budgets. A week before payday, she suggested to her children that they go to the park, picnic, ride bikes or do anything that didn't involve having to 'buy a ticket or spend any money.' 'They asked to do something which costs money, but offered to pay for it themselves with birthday/pocket money (adults go free),' the mom said of her children. 'At this point, honestly, I was pleased and proud they were showing initiative, cooperating with one another, negotiating as a team, etc." 'They have enough to pay without emptying their savings, so I happily agreed,' she added. The mother said that when they arrived at the activity, her children told the cashier they were only able to come after offering to pay for the outing themselves. Strangers standing nearby began 'tutting and muttering that no child should have to buy their own tickets' and critiqued her parenting. 'I sort of stuttered that I was actually very proud of them working together to find a solution to get to do something they'd wanted to do, then we moved away,' the mom said. 'I didn't want to start explaining the whole backstory, financial circumstances, etc. 'But now I'm starting to feel guilty, and maybe I should have held the boundary that a no money day is just that, regardless of where the funds come from,' she continued, before asking members of the forum to share their opinions. 'AIBU [am I being unreasonable] to have let them pay?' she asked. 'I was feeling really positive about it all till about 10 minutes ago :(' A flood of responses to the post attempted to reassure the mom that she isn't the only parent strapped for cash by the end of the month. Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. Many said they wouldn't have shamed her for allowing her children to pay for the outing. 'Not at all unreasonable, you've taught them a valuable life lesson that money isn't growing on trees,' one person commented. 'Ignore that nosey, judgey cow. I think this is totally fine 👍 it's not like you make them pay for their bed and board every week 🤷' another said. The PEOPLE Puzzler crossword is here! How quickly can you solve it? Play now! 'What happened to saving up to do/buy something? This used to be normal,' a third wrote. 'Now, kids seem to be given whatever they want whenever they want. Your children will understand the value of money, this woman's children may well be throwing a strop next time they aren't just given something simply because they want it.' Read the original article on People
Yahoo
6 hours ago
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
Jilted Bride Says She's ‘Gobsmacked' After Her Bridesmaid Made a Big Decision on What Would've Been Her Wedding Day
A woman canceled her wedding in Italy after discovering that her fiancé had been cheating with "numerous women" In a Mumsnet post on June 23, she revealed that some of the wedding party went ahead with going to the European country for the weekend She was left "gobsmacked" when one of her bridesmaids got engaged during the trip on the day that would've been her weddingA jilted bride is accusing one of her bridesmaids of being 'insensitive' for announcing their engagement. On Monday, June 23, the woman penned a Mumsnet post explaining that she found out four months ago her fiancé was cheating with 'numerous women,' and so their wedding that was set to take place in Italy was canceled. She said some of the bridal party decided to go ahead with going to the European country for the weekend, as they had already paid a 'big expense' for their flights and accommodation. 'My best friend (and bridesmaid) was one of these guests and she contacted me via FaceTime yesterday to tell me her boyfriend proposed on Saturday (which should have been my wedding day) on the beach in Italy 🙈,' the woman wrote. 'I was absolutely gobsmacked and replied, saying I was pleased for her, but I needed time to process the news and ended the call,' she continued. 'I am happy for her, but I do feel it's totally insensitive, and I'm in total shock.' Struggling to accept her friend's happiness, the jilted bride asked, 'How do I move past this?' Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. The post garnered hundreds of responses with the majority of commenters arguing that her critique of her friend was unreasonable. Several people advised her to focus on how 'lucky' she was to have found out that her partner wasn't loyal before tying the knot and told her to put her hurt aside to celebrate her friend. 'It wasn't your wedding day,' one person wrote. 'Her life doesn't stop because you didn't get married. Her boyfriend proposed and she said yes, timing wasn't her choice. Sorry your ex was a d--------, but life goes on.' 'Was she supposed to turn him down because of the date? Or just not tell you?' another chimed in. 'I can understand why you'd be a bit sad about it, but she's not really done anything wrong.' is now available in the Apple App Store! Download it now for the most binge-worthy celeb content, exclusive video clips, astrology updates and more! A third said, 'I can only imagine what a tough day it was for you, sending you a hug. I think you're justified in feeling hurt. But your bridesmaid didn't ask to be proposed to, and I'm sure you'd have been thrilled for her had it been a different place and time. She has been insensitive in breaking the news to you in the way she has." "I'm sure in her shoes I'd have said 'I'd love to marry you, and my answer is 'yes' but I think we should get officially engaged somewhere else because after all, this should have been best friend's wedding day/location and I don't want to rub her nose in it,' ' the same person continued. 'I wouldn't fall out with her, but I would share your feelings with her sensitively.' Read the original article on People
News.com.au
18 hours ago
- Health
- News.com.au
Health anxiety is the 3am curse plaguing Aussie mums
It was a tiny, crescent-shaped birthmark on the inside of my five-month-old's thigh that started it all. Until that point, new motherhood had for me, mostly been the kind of oxytocin-fuelled, soft-lit montage of bliss you see in Huggies ads. I had a 'good' sleeper, a great support network and a new parents group who got together for champagne brunches. We were killing it, my baby and I. Then the birthmark. Surely it had been there since he was born, but for whatever reason, I noticed it one morning and couldn't stop fixating on what it meant. Convinced it was a sign of some sinister illness, I followed the Reddit-Mumsnet-Web MD rabbit hole down to the most obscure depths of Dr Google. By nightfall I'd diagnosed him with a serious, degenerative neurodevelopmental disorder. My mother was staying with us at the time; she found me in the bathtub with my baby, sobbing and panicked while he stared up at me, bewildered by the fuss. A GP visit, ostensibly booked to confirm my baby's diagnosis, morphed into a referral to a psychologist and a diagnosis of health anxiety. Health anxiety, also known as illness anxiety disorder or hypochondria, is a form of anxiety that manifests as intense fear of having or developing an illness, even when there is little evidence to support the belief. Except rather than worrying about my own health, I was fixated on that of my baby. 'It's called health anxiety by proxy,' explains psychologist Anoushka Dowling, of the lesser-known condition. 'And it is the same fear and preoccupation, but this time directed at the health of your children. It is fearing the worst from minor symptoms, for example: 'what if this headache is actually a brain tumour?' According to Dowling, there are several telltale signs a person might be experiencing health anxiety by proxy. 'They will likely be constantly thinking about or talking about a particular illness or health related worry,' she says. 'They also may be checking for signs and symptoms, and usually turning to online sources to find more information. A person with health anxiety may either repeatedly seek assurance from health professionals, (oftentimes more than once because of a fear of signs being missed) OR they will avoid health professionals altogether out of fear that their worries will be validated.' Dowling says that while worrying about your child's health is, to some extent, a normal part of parenthood, fixating to the point that it causes you distress or is without evidence means there could be a problem. The advent of 'Dr Google' (where every headache is a tumour and every bruise is leukaemia) has exacerbated things she says, as has, more recently, Covid. It all sounds very familiar. While that first acute episode of health anxiety by proxy was by far the worst, there have been other periods in my nine years as a mother where it has raised its ugly head. And while therapy has helped mostly overcome the 3am curse that would keep me awake, googling in a cold sweat, it's also been a numbers game: the sheer volume of times I've assumed the worst, only to be proven wrong. On the surface, some of my more dramatic moments have been laughable, were it not for the real panic underpinning them. The time I took my second newborn to the child health nurse over concerns she yawned too much, for example. Or the ultrasound I demanded of my son's skull because I was sure it was 'too bumpy'. And yes, Covid, with all its uncertainty and hand-washing and invisible threat, left me grappling for a time with a rising dread every time a runny nose or a fever spiked. It's an experience borne out in the numbers: studies clearly show that health anxiety has increased in the past decade (with a decent boost delivered by the pandemic), and while, as a relatively new condition, there aren't a lot of epidemiological data on health anxiety by proxy, experts say anecdotally they're encountering it more frequently as well. 'The sheer volume of information on the internet means that we can find something to confirm almost any fear we have,' explains Dowling. 'Increased feelings of anxiety can inhibit our brain's ability to critically analyse information and increase our tendency to look for information that confirms our fears rather than alleviates them. The internet is great for many things, but self-diagnosis is not one of them! We're way too biased about ourselves, and particularly about our children to gather and interpret information effectively.' Instead, Dowling suggests reaching out to speak to your GP or a psychologist if you suspect you might be suffering from health anxiety by proxy. 'Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is generally the most effective form of treatment for health anxiety, as it involves identifying distorted thinking and uses evidence-based reasoning to challenge the thoughts,' she explains. 'It will also include relaxation techniques, exposure therapy and behavioural activation to ensure that a person is still able to fully participate in life, because one of the major impacts of leaving health anxiety or healthy anxiety by proxy untreated is the risk of disengaging from everyday activities. 'You may stop socialising, take your child out of school or daycare, or simply stop engaging in activities that once bought you or your child joy, out of fear of serious illness. The excessive worry and preoccupation about illness makes it challenging to enjoy life - which is something that it is definitely possible to treat.'
Spectator
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- Spectator
The Ministry of Lesbian Affairs is as sweet and comforting as a knickerbocker glory
The Ministry of Lesbian Affairs is a comedy that feels as sweet and comforting as a knickerbocker glory. The show is set in a leaky scout hut where a bunch of lesbians meet to perform choral music. The conductor, Connie, has the bluff, good-natured energy of an RAF squadron leader. 'Snippety-snap,' she calls as she encourages the 'ladies' to warm up. Correct pronoun usage doesn't interest her. Nor does non-binary language. She's an OWL (older wiser lesbian) and she runs the choir like a drop-in centre for strays, fugitives and sexual rejects in need of a substitute family. The newest arrival, Dina, is a Qatari princess who lives in a luxury apartment with her controlling brute of a husband. Dina catches the eye of Ellie, the choir's in-house seductress, but Connie puts a stop to their flirtation. 'Try not to sleep with any new members,' she tells Ellie. 'They're too scared to come back.' When Lori arrives with her long-term girlfriend, Ana, the tensions in their relationship spill out into the open. Lori is a closeted lesbian who hates to be seen hugging Ana in public. Ana, meanwhile, is about to leave London in search of a new job because she works for a racist university. 'They're understandably embarrassed at having an all-white post-colonial literature department.' In Act Two, the choir perform at a Pride festival where Dina sports a T-shirt that defines a lesbian as 'a woman who loves a woman'. Some in the crowd take exception to this bland statement and the choir's performance is cut short. Public accusations of transphobia are made worse when followers of Mumsnet join in the controversy. 'They're expressing solidarity with us!' says Fi, in horror. (The script is full of double-edged gags like this.) The women find solutions to their problems and the show ends on a happy upbeat note. Even the conflict over trans rights is resolved with smiles all round. The production by Hannah Hauer-King looks and feels terrific. There are great performances from Serena Manteghi as the innocently beautiful Dina and from Shuna Snow as Connie, the inspirational leader. She wields her baton like a clown mimicking a pretentious maestro conducting the Berlin Philharmonic. A beautiful piece of physical comedy. What's refreshing about this production is that each character qualifies as a 'victim' on paper. If you want a tick-box show, here it is. Ellie and Lori are black lesbians, Fi uses a wheelchair, Bridge is a trans woman, and Ana is on the run from racist bigots. And yet the show makes no special appeal to the supporters of each cause. Like the best comedy, it just wants to be amusing, open and humane. It gives everyone what everyone needs: a sense of common ground. Cruel Britannia opens with a contrite announcement made by an unnamed Australian voiceover. He solemnly expresses his remorse for the expropriation of lands from the aboriginal peoples without their consent. An odd start for a play staged in a basement near Waterloo. Then a shift of tone. A figure appears in a spangly jacket, a lacy black skirt and a pair of shiny DMs with mismatched laces – purple and orange. The figure is male and his tanned body is copiously adorned with tattoos. He tells a story set in the 1980s about two friends named Frank and Harry. Both are Millwall supporters and they enjoy travelling the country fighting with rival hooligans. The location flits all over the place. Sometimes Frank is on a train bound for Manchester. Sometimes he's in a Soho alleyway. Occasionally he enters his dead mother's wardrobe where he wraps himself in a crimson party frock infused with her scent. To complicate matters, Frank appears to be the main character as well as the narrator. There are cryptic references to the 'ICF' which will puzzle those who are unaware that hooligans in the 1980s gave themselves semi-official nicknames like 'intercity firm'. Likewise, a 'man who works for the coal board' refers to a Thatcherite opponent of the miners' strike of 1984-85. In the middle of this puzzling monologue, something happens to Harry. Murdered perhaps. Jail time is mentioned but the references are oblique. Later, we learn that Frank is gay, which explains his penchant for alleyways in Soho. And Harry appears to be gay as well. Perhaps that's the point here. From the late 1970s, football violence declined as society grew more tolerant of homosexuality. This show hints that the thugs who clashed outside football stadiums on Saturday afternoons were closeted gay males seeking a socially acceptable outlet for their passions. The script would be of interest to social historians if the narrative were better orchestrated and signposted. But it can't escape its riddling obscurity. The show has no idea what it wants to say or why. Take the opening apology to Australia. What's that for? Lord knows.
