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6 Signs You Were Raised By A Narcissist
6 Signs You Were Raised By A Narcissist

Yahoo

time4 days ago

  • General
  • Yahoo

6 Signs You Were Raised By A Narcissist

To outsiders, your dad is a larger-than-life social magnet who attracts people from all walks of life. Or your mom is the perfect woman, always looking to please and juggling everything with ease. But behind closed doors, all pretense falls away. Only you, their child, knows what it's like to endure their cold shoulders for days on end over a minor infraction, or bear the brunt of constant, age-inappropriate demands for perfection and strength. You know what it's like to be parented by a narcissist. Narcissistic Personality Disorder is one of 10 personality disorders described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, an authoritative psychiatric guide. Narcissists tend to have an inflated sense of self-worth and base their identity on the praise and approval of others. Their intimate relationships are superficial and focused mostly on how other people reflect on them, with little to no empathy for the other person's experience. They genuinely believe that they're better than other people, but they are also prone to feeling intense shame over critiques they receive or mistakes they make. Researchers estimate that less than one percent of the general population has evidence of 'full-blown' NPD, but anywhere from two to 16 percent of people who seek therapy have the disorder. That's usually because the loved ones in their lives have demanded they seek help or risk losing their relationship, career or other life privileges, explains therapist Wendy Behary, founder of The Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey and author of the book Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed. But children of narcissists are rarely in a position to demand that their parents seek help. In fact, they may not even realize that their parents were narcissists until they seek professional help for their own struggles, said Behary, who specializes in treating people with NPD and their 'survivors.' While narcissists come in all varieties and their symptoms vary across a spectrum, Behary notes that there are a few ways for adult children to tell they may have been raised by a narcissist. In the points below, both she and psychologist Craig Malkin, author of the book Rethinking Narcissism: The Bad — And Surprising Good — About Feeling Special, break down the signs of a narcissistic parent, and what adult children should do to break the cycle of destructive decisions. A narcissistic parent will trample all over their family to address their own desires without giving much thought to what anyone else needs. Because of this, some adult children of narcissists will actually overcorrect and bend over backwards to make sure no one could ever possibly perceive them this way. Alternately, they may have grown up all their lives being told that their needs don't matter. Either way, the result is the same: They let people walk all over them because they're not in touch with what they need and they don't know how to express it. 'They're not able to say, 'I matter,' and 'I have needs' because that feels narcissistic,' explained Behary. 'Someone who's fighting hard not to be a narcissistic parent ends up being trampled on.' 'I've seen clients whose parents made them feel sick, crazy, or selfish for expressing the most basic of needs,' agreed Malkin. 'One of my clients felt so worthless and frightened as an adult, he suffered from nightmares and cowered in the face of any authority figures because they reminded him of his abusive father.' What you can do: Learn as much about narcissism as you can, in order to be able to identify the dysfunctional messages you grew up with and start working against them. 'If I meet someone who has grown up with a narcissistic parent, or if I'm clued in that that might be the case, it's really important for me to make sure that they understand narcissism in all of its colors,' said Behary. 'We figure out together what type of narcissism their parent had, but even more importantly, we have to look for the part of them that got lost along the way.' Not everyone overcorrects in reaction to seeing narcissism. Some children see that the only way to avoid ridicule and abuse is to be like the narcissistic parent, and over the years, this survival tactic turns into the way they genuinely see the world. Adult children who adopted these coping mechanisms may find themselves putting others down out of a fear ― rooted in childhood ― that if they don't show strength first, they could be crushed, just like when they were young, explained Malkin. 'Extremely strong-willed children, more extraverted from birth, sometimes become narcissistic themselves in a game of 'If you can't beat 'em, join 'em,'' he said. What you can do: Seek the help of a professional to help you break out of abusive behavior patterns, especially if you already have a partner and/or children. 'Children of narcissists who find themselves name-calling and hurling insults aren't without hope, but they need to roll up their sleeves and work hard emotionally,' said Malkin. 'They need to become comfortable feeling ― and expressing ― vulnerable feelings like sadness, loneliness, fear, and overwhelm with those they love.' Narcissists have trouble with personal boundaries and view other people as extensions of themselves. In families with several children, one may be chosen to reflect the narcissist's best qualities. They get the most attention, praise and support, but are also under the most pressure to perform. Another child may be a target for the parent's blame and shame, and scapegoated as a burden that can never do anything right compared to the chosen child. They may also be blamed as the reason that a narcissistic parent is forced to act in an abusive way. Both projections are two different sides of a narcissist's personality, but the chosen child and the scapegoat will have two very different childhoods, and this pits them against each other, even into adulthood. What you can do: Reach out to your sibling with what you've learned. If you were the chosen child, you might resent your sibling for the fact that they were under a lot less pressure than you. But if you were the scapegoat, you might resent your sibling for soaking up all the praise and glory and leaving none for you. Understand that the narcissist pits people against each other on purpose, to serve their own needs, and that this dynamic wasn't your fault. 'Extremely narcissistic people love to put people on pedestals — almost as much as they enjoy knocking them off them,' said Malkin. 'Perfect people don't disappoint, so if you idolize people ― even your kids ― you needn't ever worry about being disappointed or hurt. Scapegoating accomplishes much the same thing. You never have to worry about expecting too much and being disappointed because none of us really expect anything from people we view as worthless.' There is hope for siblings who were put in this position as children, said Behary ― even if the only thing that unites them in the end is the shared experience of having a narcissistic parent. 'They can end up feeling extremely bonded to one another,' said Behary. 'Common hostages going through different phases of torture, based on how bad the narcissist might be in their life.' Not all narcissists command the spotlight with their bold, brash personalities. Some narcissists demand the attention of the room by playing the victim or describing their problems as greater than anyone else's problems. They may also try to control other people's actions by threatening to harm themselves unless a certain outcome goes their way. People with this kind of narcissistic parent may feel that they spend their entire childhood running to put one fire out after another, or trying to maintain the peace so that no one is hurt. Some of Behary's clients tell her that they felt more like their mother's husband than their mother's son, and this burden meant that they were doing more of the emotional supporting than the parent was. Or they felt their life was all about keeping their father from getting angry at the family. 'It's the sense of drama that the child feels they have to manage,' said Behary. 'In order to do that, they really have to forfeit a lot of their own innate childhood needs.' What you can do: Take time to acknowledge the young child that's still inside you, and ask what his or her needs were and still are. Behary advocates using the power of imagination ― aided, perhaps, by photos from childhood ― to acknowledge the emotional needs that weren't met and still aren't being fulfilled by your parents. 'She's still suffering in there and she needs someone to care about her,' said Behary. 'She needs to be able to feel that she's fine. She needs to know that she has rights too.' Some children of narcissists figure out that the only way to get along in this world is to do as their parent does and derive their self-worth from production, performance and achievement. While they may not be beset by the perilously low self-esteem and overwhelming sense of shame of a true narcissist, some adult children may take on behaviors like workaholism because their performance is the only way they've ever been taught to define themselves. 'The child of the narcissist learns that the only thing that matters is what I can produce in the world, not just my own little being,' said Behary. '[This] is very similar to the way the narcissist can be in the world, except children of narcissists may not have same brash overcoating ― they're more detached, more self-contained.' What you can do: Try to empathize with your parent, suggests Behary. You don't have to feel sorry for them, but it can be helpful to emotionally inhabit the feelings and choices of another person, to understand their thoughts and decisions, even if you don't agree with them. Because of Behary's work with narcissists, she understand that they are often intensely suffering because the survival tactics they learned in childhood are backfiring on them in adulthood. While some researchers think that there may be a biological basis that makes some people more vulnerable to narcissism than others, others agree that the personality disorder stems from a complex mix of factors that include exceptionally harsh criticism and/or praise in childhood, which causes the child to shield their low self-esteem with a strong, perfect persona. It also makes the child especially needy of praise, admiration and flattery in order to feel normal, while leaving them especially vulnerable to even the slightest criticism, notes the Mayo Clinic. 'I care about the [narcissists] I work with because I know they're suffering underneath,' said Behary. 'People will say, 'You're such a softie on them,' and I say I hold them responsible for their bad behaviors, but I don't blame them for how they were formed.' Behary emphasizes that while narcissists may have turned out this way through no fault of their own, it is solely their responsibility — not their children's — to do something about it. A telling trait of narcissism is grandiosity: thoughts or feelings that one is superior to others, even if one doesn't have the achievements to justify it. Narcissistic parents may see themselves as elite, but because they never achieved a certain level of success, they may find meaning in living vicariously through their children, explained Behary. 'Many children of narcissists will say, 'I'm not sure how I ended up in this career because I never really knew what I wanted,'' said Behary. Or, 'I always felt like I was poised to be more of a reflection of my mother rather than be my own person.' What you can do: Consider going low or no-contact with abusive or manipulative parents. Not all narcissistic parents are abusive, explains Malkin. But parents with extreme forms of narcissism can leave their adult children feeling like shells of themselves, and sometimes the safest thing for adult children to do is to limit their exposure to these toxic relationships, especially if the parents don't think they have anything to apologize for. Malkin says there are three signs an adult child should consider going low or no-contact with parents: Abuse, Denial and Psychopathy. No one should ever have to put up with emotional or physical abuse, and if parents can't acknowledge the fact that there's a problem in the first place, there's little chance that anything will change. Psychopathy, which in this case will look like a pattern of easy lies and remorseless manipulation, indicates that the parents aren't just bad at putting themselves in others' shoes — they may actually lack the ability to empathize with others, and may even lack a conscience. 'Abusers are 100 percent responsible for their abuse, and only they can stop it,' Malkin concluded. 'Until they do, interactions won't be safe.' This Is The Most Dangerous Type Of Narcissism I'm A Psychologist Who Specializes In Narcissists. Here's What We Need To Do To Stop Trump. Dealing With A Narcissist? You Need To Use This Genius 'Gray Rock Method'

Subway serves up a limited-edition strawberries & cream sub for Wimbledon
Subway serves up a limited-edition strawberries & cream sub for Wimbledon

Scotsman

time6 days ago

  • Sport
  • Scotsman

Subway serves up a limited-edition strawberries & cream sub for Wimbledon

Sporting royalty Carlos Alcaraz and Novak Djokovic have arrived in SW19, which can mean only one thing, the start of the Wimbledon tennis fortnight. Sign up to our daily newsletter – Regular news stories and round-ups from around Scotland direct to your inbox Sign up Thank you for signing up! Did you know with a Digital Subscription to The Scotsman, you can get unlimited access to the website including our premium content, as well as benefiting from fewer ads, loyalty rewards and much more. Learn More Sorry, there seem to be some issues. Please try again later. Submitting... More than 28,000 kilograms of strawberries and 10,000 litres of cream are consumed at Wimbledon annually, with over 140,000 bowls dished out for the spectators and players. And now fast-food chain Subway will be serving up their own tennis ace, with limited-edition strawberries & cream sub available on the opening day of Wimbledon. The Grand Slam treat will be available in select stores on Monday, June 30. Advertisement Hide Ad Advertisement Hide Ad Rusty Warren, Senior NPD and product innovation manager at Subway, said: 'We all know that the tennis is not just about powerful serves and perfect volleys – it is also about the iconic strawberries and cream. Limited edition strawberries & cream sub being prepared 'So, we thought, why not ace it and turn this legendary courtside classic into a one-of-a-kind Sub? The result? A deliciously indulgent sweet treat that is set to serve some serious summer flavour. Trust us, it is 30–love at first bite! 'Yes, strawberries and cream, in a sandwich. The delicious rally between sweet and savoury is a serve no one saw coming - but everyone will want to taste.' Subway is serving up this winning combo for free to fans who visit select Subway restaurants, including Wimbledon, for one day only on Monday 30th June 2025. The limited-edition Sub is a bold twist on the traditional strawberries and cream summertime treat. Advertisement Hide Ad Advertisement Hide Ad Featuring freshly sliced strawberries, clotted cream, strawberry puree, and Subway's signature Italian white bread, it is a match made in food heaven. Each participating Subway restaurant will have 100 6-inch Strawberries & Cream Subs to give away on its single day debut; so, fans desperate to get their hands on one will need to sprint to their nearest location before they are gone! The Strawberries & Cream Sub will be available at the following Subway® restaurants only: Wimbledon – 6/6A Hartfield Road Birmingham – 80 Smallbrook, Queensway Liverpool – Central Shopping Centre Derby – Pride Park Bristol – Galleries Food Court To discover participating stores, visit

Successful New Products Start with a Brief
Successful New Products Start with a Brief

Business News Wales

time20-06-2025

  • Business
  • Business News Wales

Successful New Products Start with a Brief

New products are the lifeblood of the food industry. 'New' is one of the best on pack messages to encourage shoppers to buy. Successful new products have kick-started and transformed food businesses. But if you watch Channel 4's Grand Designs, you probably know what happens when a house build starts and the plan is a bit vague, the budget isn't confirmed and there doesn't appear to be an architect involved. It usually ends up with ad hoc decisions, lots of tears, a massive overspend and the family living in a caravan for much longer than they wanted. Apart from the caravan, the consequences of starting a product development project without a brief are probably similar. During my career I've being involved in launching more than 1,000 new products including own label ranges at Tesco, branded products at McVitie's and supporting client businesses to launch their products. The larger companies have very structured and robust new product development (NPD) processes, which usually start with a very comprehensive product brief. At Tesco this was one of my responsibilities and in my group, with suppliers' support we would launch around 350 new products a year. Despite having NPD briefs, I've been involved in a number of NPD failures. A brief is no guarantee of a successful product launch, but the absence of one significantly increases the likelihood of failure. Bringing new products to market can be time consuming and costly. This sounds harsh, but it is irresponsible to start an NPD project without a formal and robust brief. The real benefit of a brief is that writing it ensures that some thought has been given to the purpose and requirements of the product. A brief helps to clarify thinking, to bring colleagues from different functions together and hopefully avoid costly mid-project changes. At ZERO2FIVE Food Industry Centre we use a comprehensive, seven-page NPD briefing document. This contains sections and questions to ensure adequate thought and research is put into writing the brief. It's better to agree requirements such as maximum retail price and allergens to avoid at the briefing stage rather than after the recipe has been signed off. We run workshops to support clients to complete NPD briefs and below are some of the suggestions from the workshop: Market and consumer insights- include a summary of market and consumer insights that have informed the new product idea. Define the proposition- include reasons why both the consumer and trade partner would want to buy this new product. What's different and what's better than competitors' products? include reasons why both the consumer and trade partner would want to buy this new product. What's different and what's better than competitors' products? Team effort- involve all relevant colleagues to contribute to the brief. They will feel more invested in the project and their expertise will make the brief better. For example, if the sales team require a 50% trade margin to gain listings, this should be built into the product costings from day one. involve all relevant colleagues to contribute to the brief. They will feel more invested in the project and their expertise will make the brief better. For example, if the sales team require a 50% trade margin to gain listings, this should be built into the product costings from day one. Set clear benchmarks- there are likely to be some mandatory requirements for the product to have a chance of succeeding. This could be out-scoring competitors on key sensory measures, meeting internal margin requirements, having a minimum shelf life etc. there are likely to be some mandatory requirements for the product to have a chance of succeeding. This could be out-scoring competitors on key sensory measures, meeting internal margin requirements, having a minimum shelf life etc. Be realistic- this is particularly important when setting time scales and financials. Very few NPD projects could be launched earlier than they are and even fewer deliver better margins than expected. In my experience, costs and timings rarely improve during the course of a product development project. this is particularly important when setting time scales and financials. Very few NPD projects could be launched earlier than they are and even fewer deliver better margins than expected. In my experience, costs and timings rarely improve during the course of a product development project. Focus on the details- a good brief will focus minds and avoid the mid project changes that often delay launches and cost money. For example, specifying in the brief that Shelf Ready Packaging (SRP) is required may seem trivial nine months before launch, but a late request for SRP can reduce margins, change pallet configurations, result in a poorly designed solution and delay the launch. a good brief will focus minds and avoid the mid project changes that often delay launches and cost money. For example, specifying in the brief that Shelf Ready Packaging (SRP) is required may seem trivial nine months before launch, but a late request for SRP can reduce margins, change pallet configurations, result in a poorly designed solution and delay the launch. Director level buy-in- having senior colleagues approve an NPD brief is important. This can also help to avoid senior colleagues interfering during the development process. having senior colleagues approve an NPD brief is important. This can also help to avoid senior colleagues interfering during the development process. Minimise changes to the brief- although changes to a brief are almost inevitable, if a senior colleague has to sign off amendments it will encourage colleagues to get it right at the first attempt. During the process it is essential to refer to the current (and original) version of the brief. This avoids mission creep and the proposed new 'six pack of organic sourdough rolls for £2.50' becoming 'a four pack of white burger rolls for £2.90'. Through the Welsh Government's HELIX Programme, we're running a series of New Product Development workshops for Welsh food and drink manufacturers in June and July. More details are available here: Training and events – ZERO2FIVE

Analysts See Value in Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (SPB) at Current Levels
Analysts See Value in Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (SPB) at Current Levels

Yahoo

time17-06-2025

  • Business
  • Yahoo

Analysts See Value in Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (SPB) at Current Levels

Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (NYSE:SPB) is among the best bear market stocks to buy according to analysts. On Wednesday, Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (NYSE:SPB) reached a 52-week low, declining to $54.54. Analysts believe that the stock is undervalued at its current levels, making it a valuable stock. With the company being loud on one thing: it will not chase short-term revenue at the expense of its robust financial position, we can expect it to have promising opportunities ahead. One strategy that Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (NYSE:SPB) is holding onto is new product development (NPD) to drive future growth. Investments in innovations are expanding core categories and boosting sales and new adjacencies. The company considers buying assets at a better price as the silver lining in this macro environment, making M&A initiatives highly likely. A person enjoying the convenience of their pet products, that simplify clean-up. The COVID era speaks volumes about the performance of the company. During the peak lockdown period, Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (NYSE:SPB) grew by more than 23% in 2020, in contrast to the broader market, which grew by around 17%. Thus, in similar circumstances, SPB has a high chance of outperforming its peers when there is demand uncertainty. This is supported by the one-year price guidance of $83.57 by Yahoo Finance, implying an upside of nearly 61%. Spectrum Brands Holdings, Inc. (NYSE:SPB), headquartered in Wisconsin, United States, is a diversified consumer products and home essentials company. The core offerings of the company include pet products, personal care items, small household appliances, and home pest control solutions. From North America and Europe to Asia Pacific and the Middle East, SPB has a powerful industry presence. While we acknowledge the potential of SPB as an investment, we believe certain AI stocks offer greater upside potential and carry less downside risk. If you're looking for an extremely undervalued AI stock that also stands to benefit significantly from Trump-era tariffs and the onshoring trend, see our free report on the best short-term AI stock. READ NEXT: The Best and Worst Dow Stocks for the Next 12 Months and 10 Unstoppable Stocks That Could Double Your Money. Disclosure: None. Melden Sie sich an, um Ihr Portfolio aufzurufen.

Diagnosed narcissist reveals how to tell for sure that you aren't one
Diagnosed narcissist reveals how to tell for sure that you aren't one

Daily Record

time14-06-2025

  • Entertainment
  • Daily Record

Diagnosed narcissist reveals how to tell for sure that you aren't one

Jacob Skidmore has shared with his 300,000 followers what it is like to live with narcissistic personality disorder. A diagnosed narcissist with his own social media account has revealed the 'real reason' you can tell that you aren't one. Jacob Skidmore has shared with his 300,000 followers what it is like to live with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). ‌ NPD is a mental health condition that gives an increased sense of self-importance, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. ‌ Skidmore, who is known as The Nameless Narcissist online, says he didn't tell people about his diagnosis for years. "Whenever I attempt to be vulnerable with my friends, it's like the shame catches the words in my throat and I psychically can't say it," he told LADBible. In a video uploaded to his TikTok page, Jacob said: "A lot of people will be like, 'Oh, I have those thoughts too sometimes. Does that mean I'm a narcissist?' And the answer is probably no, and it's not because necessarily that, 'Oh, if somebody considers they're a narcissist, that means that they're not a narcissist'. "I mean, obviously I've considered it, been considering it for a while, been diagnosed with it." The 'real reason why you probably aren't a narcissist' he says is because these thoughts have to apply 'to literally everything in your life'. ‌ "Not just 'Oh, man, I got a promotion at work, so I'm feeling a little grandiose and thinking a little narcissistically'," Jacob added. "No, it's, 'Oh, I took in the groceries today better than anybody who's ever existed'." Jacob said that narcissistic thoughts must be pervasive and ego-based, meaning there's no self-judgment involved. ‌ True narcissists don't feel the need to hide their thoughts or feel guilty about them, as they believe their behaviour is justified, he says. Jacob continued: "Like me, for example. I know that these thoughts are abnormal, but I don't have any cognitive dissonance regarding them. I'm not like, 'Oh, man, I can't believe I thought this narcissistic thought today'. No, I'm thinking, 'Everybody should think like this'." He added: "A genuine narcissist thinks it's okay and justified to be a narcissist." ‌ Join the Daily Record WhatsApp community! Get the latest news sent straight to your messages by joining our WhatsApp community today. You'll receive daily updates on breaking news as well as the top headlines across Scotland. No one will be able to see who is signed up and no one can send messages except the Daily Record team. All you have to do is click here if you're on mobile, select 'Join Community' and you're in! If you're on a desktop, simply scan the QR code above with your phone and click 'Join Community'. We also treat our community members to special offers, promotions, and adverts from us and our partners. If you don't like our community, you can check out any time you like. To leave our community click on the name at the top of your screen and choose 'exit group'. If you're curious, you can read our Privacy Notice. The content creator, who is better known online as The Nameless Narcissist, previously shared a clip with his hundreds of thousands of followers explaining there are three main signs which can indicate you don't have NPD. Jacob explained that he'd never met a narcissist who didn't 'do these things', but pointed out this is just his opinion. ‌ First, he explained that feeling 'genuine' emotions is a sign someone isn't a narcissist, as he finds himself 'faking' his, saying: "Narcissists don't have those normal emotional reactions, we have to emulate them half the time." Next is whether or not you believe every person on the planet has equal worth - as in his eyes, it's 'inconceivable that two people can have it inherently the same amount of worth.' Jacob said: "For me, there's always gonna be a better person and a person below." ‌ Lastly, if you love yourself, the diagnosed narcissist reckons you definitely haven't got NPD. "A lot of people think narcissists love themselves," Jacob said of the common perception around NPD. "No, we think we're better than everybody else. "We might love how we look. We might love our intelligence. But my internal monologue is a constant stream of 'You're so stupid. Why did you do that? You're better than all these other people. How could you be so stupid?' ‌ 'There is no self love. There is no self compassion there. It's just grandiosity."

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