Latest news with #Sexpert
The Sun
4 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Sun
I'm terrified my kinky fetish will turn off my hot new girlfriend – what if it makes her question my sexuality?
I'LL never forget the biggest bedroom buzzkill I've ever experienced - and no, it's not what you're thinking. It wasn't bad breath, questionable hygiene or someone wearing socks in bed (though let's be honest, those are all heinous crimes against sex). This was something different. Something way, way worse. I was reminded of it recently when I read a letter from a reader asking how to introduce a new kink. It brought back a deeply scarring memory: the time an ex tried to spice things up by saying: 'Me and my ex used to love this.' Excuse me? Did he really just invoke the ghost of orgasms past? It gets better - he then pulled out a toy he'd used on her and suggested we use it, too. Look, I'm all for saving the planet, but if you want to save your sex life, recycling old toys is not the one. Yuck. If there's one way to kill the mood faster than a cold drought, it's bringing your ex (and her old vibrator) into the bedroom. I'm The Sun's Sexpert, and this week in my no-holds-barred sex series, I'm tackling a powerful question from a reader struggling to open up about his kinks to a new girlfriend. Q. I've recently started seeing a beautiful woman, and I'm really worried my love of anal play might scare her off. Like a lot of straight guys, I sometimes worry that admitting this might make her question my sexuality. Georgie answers your quickfire sex questions I'm not gay - I just really enjoy the sensations. In a previous relationship I used anal beads and absolutely loved them. How can I introduce them into our sex life without making things awkward? Georgie says: 'It's a shame there's still such a taboo around straight men enjoying anal play - especially when there's a biological reason it feels so good. In case you didn't know, men have a prostate gland (often called the male G-spot) located inside the anus. When stimulated, it can create incredibly intense orgasms. In recent years, the stigma has started to shift. The sex toy market for men has exploded, with more guys exploring vibrators, buzzing butt plugs, and yes - anal beads. Anal beads are a sex toy used during intercourse - either together or solo - to enhance your orgasm. That said, bringing this kind of play - or any new kink - into a new relationship can be daunting. Naturally, you can worry that opening up about your inner desires may put your new partner off, but it's important to be open about the things that turn you on. Here's how you do it… Positive communication 5 Create a safe space for you and your partner to talk. Don't do it when they're tired or stressed, do it when you're both in a good mood. Start with a relaxed, open conversation - ideally outside the bedroom. Ask them what their fantasises are first, this will open up the conversation and they will ask you back. You might say something like, 'I've explored anal play in the past and found it really enjoyable - I'd love to share that side of myself with you if you're ever open to trying it.' Start slowly If your partner is up for trying the kink you'd like you to, move slowly. Suggest using a toy on her first, which might lead to a natural exchange about mutual curiosity. Some couples find it hot to try toys on each other - and if she sees how much you're enjoying it, she might be turned on, too. Be open-minded Remember that kink is a broad spectrum. The definition is basically anything outside of 'traditional' sex - but what's considered kinky to one couple might be totally normal for another. What matters most is that you and your partner feel safe, excited, and respected in exploring whatever brings you pleasure. So don't be ashamed. Be curious, be communicative - and most of all, be honest. Use the traffic code system New positions, cheeky toys or wild fantasies can seriously crank up the heat in the bedroom. If you've got a few sexy scenarios rattling around in your head, jot them down and share them with your partner. Not sure how they'll react? Use the good old traffic light system. Green means 'let's do it!', amber is 'maybe, if I've had a glass of wine,' and red is 'not in this lifetime'. Meet our sexpert In her eight years at The Sun, there's not much our Georgie hasn't seen - or done - and she's loved every outrageous minute. "People often ask how I became a sexpert," she says. "Well, I've been fascinated by sex and relationships for as long as I can remember. "As a teen, I devoured women's mags full of scandalous confessions and steamy tips - and I was obsessed with Sex and the City. "Maybe I was manifesting my inner Carrie Bradshaw from day one. "I'd always dreamed of working at The Sun - and when I finally landed the job, I found my niche fast: going to sex parties and oversharing about my frequently chaotic love life. "Over the years, I've built real trust within the kink and swinging community and I've interviewed hundreds of people about their sex lives. "Add to that my own, um, 'field research,' and let's just say I know what makes good sex great." Georgie says being a sexpert is about having life experience, curiosity, a sense of humour - and plenty of adventures along the way. "There's not much that shocks me these days," she continues. "Except maybe a man who doesn't believe in foreplay. "But nothing makes me happier than hearing a reader say my advice helped them feel more confident (and satisfied) in bed. "Now I'll be answering your burning sex questions - and dishing out practical advice to help get you back in the saddle." Spruce up your top drawer What's that old saying? If it's within reach, you're more likely to use it — and no one ever got hot and bothered rummaging through a drawer full of granny socks. Ditch the dull cottons and make space for things that actually spark joy — like sexy lingerie and a few buzzing besties. And don't worry, gone are the days of sneaking into a shady adult shop in oversized sunglasses. You can now pick up a decent vibrator while grabbing a pint of milk - some supermarkets sell them for as little as £11. Check out the Durex Intense Delight Vibrating Bullet available at Sainsbury's. Show, don't tell 5 If you're introducing a new kink to your partner - and you're the seasoned pro while they're a total newbie - sometimes it's sexier (and smoother) to show, not tell. This keeps things playful, takes the pressure off them and helps ease you both in gently. Set the mood, start slow, and if you're bringing in a new toy or sex aid, demonstrate how it works. Think of it like a very hands-on tutorial… minus the PowerPoint. Crucially, never say 'me and my ex used to do this'. No one wants a mental image of your past sex life, so keep the conversation firmly in the present. By showing instead of explaining, you reduce the risk of awkward misunderstandings - and make the whole experience more exciting and inviting.
The Sun
20-07-2025
- General
- The Sun
I watch FIVE hours of incest porn a day and can no longer enjoy real sex with my girlfriend… so I fake orgasms instead
WHEN an ex lover slipped out of bed after a steamy tryst and headed for the bathroom, I thought he had gone for a shower to cool down. As I basked in that blissful post-orgasm glow, I had no idea what he was really up to. 5 To my surprise, he was sneaking off to the bathroom to finish the job himself — with porn playing on his phone. Wracked with guilt, he later confessed about his spiralling porn addiction and how he'd become so hooked on hardcore porn, real sex now seemed boring. I'm The Sun's Sexpert, and this week in my no-holds-barred sex series, I'm tackling a powerful question from a reader who is also struggling with porn addiction. Reading his brave letter brought back raw memories of my own experience supporting someone through the same battle — and the emotional toll it can take on both parties. If you're in a similar situation, know this: there is light at the end of the tunnel. With the right support and mindset, you can rediscover real intimacy — and enjoy a healthy, satisfying sex life again... Q: People presume it's only women who fake orgasms, but men do it too. I should know, I've been doing it for the past six months with my partner. I've become so addicted to porn, I now find 'real sex' boring. It's not stimulating enough and I feel so guilty for my girlfriend because she has no idea. I especially love incest porn, like step-mums with step-sons. Perhaps this is because I had a secret crush on my step-mum growing up. It's starting to take over my life, and I'm spending hours on it a day while I work from home. How can I find real sex enjoyable again? Georgie answers your sex questions - Tips for tiny Peckers Georgie says: 'First of all — you're not alone. Porn addiction is becoming increasingly common in the UK. Last year porn addiction treatment providers at The UKAT Group surveyed 2,000 adults aged over 18 on their porn habits. The results revealed that a staggering 8.8 million UK adults are watching porn on a weekly basis. The majority - 3.7 million- of those viewers are aged 18-34; 3.3 million are aged 35-54, and 1.8 million are aged over 55. Worryingly, other reports indicate the average age of first exposure to porn is around 11 years old, with some research indicating it's as young as eight years old. Among under-18s, approximately 60 per cent display levels of porn consumption that meet the criteria for addiction. Part of the problem is just how easy it is to access porn in today's digital world. Whether it's on your phone or laptop, it's always just a few taps away. And with platforms like OnlyFans booming - and even mainstream social media flooded with explicit content - porn has become completely normalised, making it harder to escape if you're caught in a cycle of addiction. That said, watching porn isn't inherently bad. It can be a brilliant tool to explore fantasies, self pleasure and learn new skills. But if your porn consumption is impacting other areas of your life then you could have a problem - which may require professional help. But if you're wanting to enjoy 'real' sex again, here are some tips to help you reconnect with your body, your partner, and rediscover real pleasure. Because while porn might be useful for tapping into fantasies, it can never replace true intimacy - for that, you need the human touch. 5 Open up Communication is the key to good sex. Being able to share your fantasises with your partner and say what works and what doesn't is essential for a vibrant and varied love life. Skip the blame game — instead of saying, 'I don't like it when you do X, Y, Z,' try, 'I love it when you do X, Y, Z,' and lead with what's working in your sex life before bringing up anything new you'd like to explore. Taking a positive approach puts your partner at ease and makes them far more open to talking about what turns you on — and what you'd like to try next between the sheets. Write a sex bucket list Sometimes it's hard to open up about your desires face-to-face - people get embarrassed or simply don't know what to say. A fun way around this? Write your own sex bucket list and get your partner to do the same. Then go through each item together, using a traffic light system to share your turn-ons and boundaries: Green for 'oh baby, yes please'; Amber for 'maybe, let's talk about it'; Red for 'absolutely not, hun!' It's a playful, pressure-free way to communicate - and a great reminder that sex should be fun, not serious. Meet our sexpert In her eight years at The Sun, there's not much our Georgie hasn't seen - or done - and she's loved every outrageous minute. "People often ask how I became a sexpert," she says. "Well, I've been fascinated by sex and relationships for as long as I can remember. "As a teen, I devoured women's mags full of scandalous confessions and steamy tips - and I was obsessed with Sex and the City. "Maybe I was manifesting my inner Carrie Bradshaw from day one. "I'd always dreamed of working at The Sun - and when I finally landed the job, I found my niche fast: going to sex parties and oversharing about my frequently chaotic love life. "Over the years, I've built real trust within the kink and swinging community and I've interviewed hundreds of people about their sex lives. "Add to that my own, um, 'field research,' and let's just say I know what makes good sex great." Georgie says being a sexpert is about having life experience, curiosity, a sense of humour - and plenty of adventures along the way. "There's not much that shocks me these days," she continues. "Except maybe a man who doesn't believe in foreplay. "But nothing makes me happier than hearing a reader say my advice helped them feel more confident (and satisfied) in bed. "Now I'll be answering your burning sex questions - and dishing out practical advice to help get you back in the saddle." Try tantra If you're recovering from a porn addiction, chances are you've been overstimulated and conditioned to expect fast, furious, goal-driven sex. Slowing everything down and getting back in touch with your body can be a game-changer - and that's where Tantra comes in. Tantric sex isn't about rushing to the finish line. It's about connection, touch, and the journey. Start by lying next to your partner naked for ten minutes each night, simply caressing one another. You can hover your hands over each other's genitals, but don't engage in foreplay or intercourse. Just enjoy the intimacy, the build-up, the tease. Do this nightly for a week, gradually increasing the intensity - and when you do finally go all the way, the suspense and connection can lead to longer, deeper and more satisfying orgasms. Take sex out of the bedroom It may sound simple but taking sex out of the bedroom can actually help you reconnect with your partner and make things more exciting. Couples who report a healthy sex life often mix up locations and positions to things spontaneous and spicy. Shower sex can be a great way to do this. Just make sure you invest in a bathmat first; there's nothing sexy about a trip to A&E. Have a 'one night stand' If you're in a relationship, cast your mind back to when you first met — that blissful just-met sex, when you couldn't keep your hands off each other. What made it so exciting? In the early stages of a relationship, we're in what's called the limerence phase — often dubbed the honeymoon period. It's when everything feels electric, we overlook flaws, and the desire is instant and overwhelming. As time goes on most couples naturally fall into a routine. That wild, rip-each-other's-clothes-off urge starts to fade. In long-term relationships, our bodies often shift to what's known as responsive desire — where one of you initiates and the other gets turned on in response, rather than both feeling that instant, primal lust. But you can absolutely recreate that just-met spark. Book into a hotel and have a cheeky one-night stand — with each other. Go full roleplay: meet at a bar, pretend you're strangers, and seduce each other all over again. It's a fun and naughty way to bring back the thrill. Book a sexcation If you're coming out of a porn addiction, there are lots of reasons you might have turned to it in the first place. One way to reconnect with real-life intimacy is by booking a sexy getaway — ideally with your partner if you're in a relationship. Turn off your phone, and turn each other on. There are plenty of adults-only hotels designed for just that — from luxury stays with private dungeons to swinging retreats and everything in between. And if kink isn't your thing, no worries. A romantic break somewhere sunny can work wonders too. Soak up that vitamin D — because sunlight is brilliant for boosting both your mood and your libido.
The Sun
06-07-2025
- Entertainment
- The Sun
I'm convinced my tiny penis was to blame for girlfriend dumping me – now I'm terrified to have sex with my new lover
WHEN I think back to the best sex I've had, it's not the size of the pecker I remember, it's the whole package. It's the guys who took their time, who slowed things down and explored me from head to toe. The ones who genuinely cared about my pleasure and wanted to understand what really turned me on. They might not have been blessed with the biggest kit, but they knew exactly how to use the tools they'd been given. You may recognise me from some of the steamy stories I've covered over the years - from hush-hush high society sex soirees in Venice to entering an orgasm contest in New York to mark the 30th anniversary of When Harry Met Sally. I'm The Sun's Sexpert, and now I'm launching a new no-holds-barred sex series to answer YOUR biggest bedroom conundrums, sharing my wild real-life experiences and practical tips to help you fulfil your wildest dreams between the sheets. If you're struggling in the sack, hiding a secret kink or want any other advice, be sure to send in your sex conundrums using the form above. Here I kick off by helping a reader out with an, ahem, small problem... Q: I'm quite a big guy (6ft 2) so women always expect me to be well endowed, but my penis size is just 3.5 inches when erect. Whenever I meet a woman I like, I start to dread getting it on as I'm worried I'm going to be a total flop. I'm convinced my last serious relationship broke down because of the size of my manhood. What's more, I don't think I've ever given a woman an orgasm. Some exes admitted to faking it to spare my feelings. Now, if I meet a woman I like, I end up ghosting her before sex as I can't handle the thought of disappointing her. I had a vagina makeover including a 'vampire' lift & infamous 'O-shot'...it's transformed me from a knackered mum of two to sex goddess having best orgasms of my life Is there a way I can still be a good lover when I'm not blessed downstairs? Georgie says: Contrary to common belief, you don't need to be hung like a porn star to rock a woman's world. When it comes to actual pleasure, technique trumps size every time. And here's the science bit. The average penis size is around 5.1 inches, and the vaginal canal is roughly 3 to 4 inches deep - so anything much bigger is actually a bit of a waste. That said, if you're short on inches and worried about hitting the spot there are lots of clever tips and tricks you can do to maximise contact and boost pleasure. Because in the end, it's not the size of the ship - it's whether you know how to steer it… Be present When you're fully in the moment, you're more in tune with your own body - and your partner's. You can read their reactions, adjust your touch, pace, and position, and make everything feel more intense and pleasurable. One of my worst sexual encounters? With a ridiculously hot guy who was well above average… but who actually took a phone call mid-session! Yes really! I had big expectations but despite his pornstar package, he was a total flop. So here's the deal: turn off your phone - and turn on your partner instead. Being present isn't just polite - it's one of the sexiest, most essential ingredients for great sex. Use the 10:5:10 foreplay rule A whopping 75 per cent of women won't orgasm from penetrative sex alone, so it's time to prioritise your starters before diving into the main course. Enter the 10:5:10 foreplay rule – a simple but seriously effective formula that always leaves me begging for more. And no, you don't need a stopwatch to do it. First 10 minutes: Focus on everything above the neck. That means deep kissing, lip biting, hair pulling, nibbling earlobes – basically, hitting all those glorious erogenous zones that get her mind and body in sync. Next 5 minutes: Move south, from neck to belly button. Nipple play is key here – with 82 per cent of women reporting increased arousal from stimulation, it's a guaranteed way to ramp things up. Final 10 minutes: Now comes the grand finale – all the attention below the navel. This is clitoral central, so use your hands, your mouth, or bring in a toy to tease, tantalise and truly take your time. Meet our sexpert In her eight years at The Sun, there's not much our Georgie hasn't seen - or done - and she's loved every outrageous minute. "People often ask how I became a sexpert," she says. "Well, I've been fascinated by sex and relationships for as long as I can remember. "As a teen, I devoured women's mags full of scandalous confessions and steamy tips - and I was obsessed with Sex and the City. "Maybe I was manifesting my inner Carrie Bradshaw from day one. "I'd always dreamed of working at The Sun - and when I finally landed the job, I found my niche fast: going to sex parties and oversharing about my frequently chaotic love life. "Over the years, I've built real trust within the kink and swinging community and I've interviewed hundreds of people about their sex lives. "Add to that my own, um, 'field research,' and let's just say I know what makes good sex great." Georgie says being a sexpert is about having life experience, curiosity, a sense of humour - and plenty of adventures along the way. "There's not much that shocks me these days," she continues. "Except maybe a man who doesn't believe in foreplay. "But nothing makes me happier than hearing a reader say my advice helped them feel more confident (and satisfied) in bed. "Now I'll be answering your burning sex questions - and dishing out practical advice to help get you back in the saddle." Invest in a sex cushion I'll never forget the moment an ex - let's call him Mark - whipped out this inflatable sex cushion and started blowing it up. I won't lie, it didn't look like the sexiest contraption, but looks can definitely be deceiving. What really stuck with me was how Mark owned the fact he was below average and wasn't afraid to try something innovative to up his bedroom game. One of my worst sexual encounters? A guy who answered a phone call mid-session! Georgie Culley And honestly? He was on to something. The humble sex cushion is one of the greatest inventions ever. It helps you master nearly every position by supporting your body at just the right angles, so you get deeper thrusts and longer, stronger orgasms. There are loads of sex aids out there, ranging from £17 to well over £100, but this one from Amazon is a winner - and it's priced at £42.99. Try the pairing technique A helping hand – so to speak – during sex can make all the difference when it comes to helping a woman cross the finish line. While vaginal penetration alone isn't enough for most women to orgasm, adding clitoral stimulation – whether with fingers or a toy – can significantly boost both the likelihood and intensity of climax. This technique is known as 'pairing', and so many women tell how it's a total gamechanger for them. One standout toy that's firmly in my top drawer? Ann Summer's Moregasm+ Clit Stim. Made from silky silicone that moulds beautifully to your body, it's the perfect shape to slip between you during sex — without getting in the way. Best bit? It stays on target, even when things get really steamy. Improve hip flexibility You don't need to be a gymnast to level up your sex life — but improving your hip flexibility could seriously elevate your bedroom game. Being a bit bendier between the sheets allows for deeper penetration, smoother thrusting and more adventurous positions without the awkward cramping. The hip flexor stretch is a simple exercise to help open your hips. Kneel on one knee, with the other foot in front at a 90-degree angle. Gently push your hips forward to stretch the front of your hip. Hold for 30 seconds each side. Mix up your positions 5 Doggy style is a classic for a reason and my go-to position if a guy isn't that well endowed. That's because it allows for deep penetration, so you can make the most of what you've got. To do it, have your partner on all fours - or for even deeper sensations, on their elbows and knees - while you enter from behind. It's also great for pairing with a hand or a toy for extra pleasure. Elevated reverse cowgirl is a twist on the usual. Your partner straddles you, but instead of facing you, they face away - towards your feet. To give you extra depth, pop a pillow under your hips. You'll be lying back on the bed or floor, while they sit on top, facing away, riding you. The flatiron might sound like a hair tool, but it's also a sizzling sex position. Have your girlfriend lie flat on their front, legs squeezed together. Add a pillow under her pelvis to lift her hips slightly. You then lie on top and enter from behind. The tightness of her thighs ups the friction and sensation - and helps both of you feel every inch.
