Latest news with #generationalDifferences
Yahoo
a day ago
- General
- Yahoo
15 Ways Boomers Handle Emotion Differently
The generational tapestry of how we express emotions is ever-evolving, each era weaving its unique patterns. While Millennials and Gen Z often wear their hearts on their sleeves, Baby Boomers tend to navigate feelings with a different compass. Their methods may appear enigmatic, but beneath the surface lies a blend of history, experience, and societal influence. Let's dive into how Boomers handle emotions distinctively, offering us a lens into a world where restraint often trumps rawness. Boomers frequently project a stoic exterior, a characteristic that often leaves younger generations perplexed. This emotional restraint is rooted in a culture that encouraged keeping personal affairs private, a stark contrast to today's social media oversharing. According to Dr. Nancy Schlossberg, a renowned psychologist, many Boomers were conditioned to believe that displaying emotion was synonymous with vulnerability, an ethos passed down from their own parents who lived through the Great Depression. As a result, they've mastered the art of maintaining a calm facade while internally processing a complex array of emotions. Underneath this composed exterior, Boomers often engage in profound introspection. Their emotional landscapes are rich and varied, though not always visible to the casual observer. They might journal, meditate, or express themselves through art forms like painting or music, which serve as private outlets for their feelings. This internal complexity reflects a generation adept at navigating emotional nuances without the need for public acknowledgment. Silence is a language Boomers speak fluently, often opting for quiet reflection over immediate verbal expression. In a world that increasingly values vocal immediacy, Boomers find strength in the pause, a moment to collect thoughts before articulating them. This face-saving silence acts as a buffer, allowing them to process emotions before they surface in conversation. It's a way of maintaining control, ensuring that words are measured and meaningful. But don't mistake their silence for indifference. Boomers have honed the ability to listen deeply and observe keenly, often gaining insights that could be missed in a more hurried exchange. Their penchant for silence is, paradoxically, a tool for connection, allowing them to understand and respond with empathy. This calculated quietness is less about avoiding confrontation and more about fostering genuine, thoughtful dialogue when they do choose to speak. For Boomers, rituals serve as emotional anchors, grounding them in times of change or uncertainty. These rituals, ranging from morning coffee routines to annual family gatherings, provide a sense of stability and continuity. According to sociologist Dr. Christine Carter, rituals are a way for Boomers to process emotions through habitual practice, creating a comforting rhythm in their lives. This attachment to routine is a hallmark of their emotional resilience. Engaging in these rituals allows Boomers to navigate emotional waters without capsizing. The predictability of their routines offers solace, a structured space where feelings can be acknowledged and managed. Even mundane tasks, when performed with intention, become meditative acts that center their emotional state. For Boomers, these rituals are not mere habits but essential components of their emotional well-being. When emotions run high, Boomers often channel their energy into problem-solving rather than venting. This pragmatic approach is deeply ingrained, stemming from a time when resilience was revered and emotional expression was less encouraged. Instead of airing grievances, they focus on actionable steps to address the underlying issues. This methodical approach enables them to feel in control, turning potential emotional spirals into constructive outcomes. While some may interpret this as emotional suppression, it's more about reframing emotions as catalysts for change. Boomers view challenges as opportunities for growth, a mindset that prioritizes solutions over complaints. This doesn't mean they lack emotional depth; rather, they choose to express it through decisive action. By concentrating on resolution, they find a sense of purpose and fulfillment that alleviates emotional turmoil. Boomers often rely heavily on established support systems, valuing loyalty and trust developed over the years. These systems might include long-term friendships, familial bonds, or even community groups that have stood the test of time. Research by Dr. Robert Putnam, a social scientist, highlights how Boomers' deep-rooted connections foster emotional security, acting as a buffer against life's stresses. In contrast to newer social networks, these time-honored relationships offer a profound sense of belonging and understanding. This loyalty to tried-and-true support systems reflects their preference for depth over breadth in relationships. They cherish the familiarity and shared history within these circles, which provide a safe space for emotional expression. Rather than seeking validation from a wide audience, Boomers find solace in the intimate company of those who truly know them. This selective sharing nurtures a sense of emotional safety and continuity that is both comforting and empowering. Adept at compartmentalization, Boomers often manage emotions by neatly categorizing different aspects of their lives. This mental filing system allows them to focus on one issue at a time, reducing overwhelm and enhancing clarity. While it might seem like avoidance, compartmentalization is a strategic tool they use to prevent personal and professional spheres from colliding. By isolating emotions, they're able to tackle challenges with a clear head. This approach reflects their commitment to maintaining balance and order. Boomers understand that not every problem requires immediate emotional investment, allowing them to prioritize effectively. Compartmentalization offers them control over their emotional responses, ensuring that each situation is addressed with appropriate attention. This methodical separation of feelings becomes a powerful ally in both personal development and emotional resilience. Boomers often display a quiet strength rooted in self-reliance, a hallmark of their generational identity. Born into a world that celebrated independence, they learned to navigate emotional landscapes without heavily relying on others. According to Dr. Bella DePaulo, a respected psychologist, this self-reliance is not about isolation but rather a confidence in their ability to handle life's ups and downs. It's an emotional toolkit filled with personal insights and inner resources. This strength doesn't negate the importance of community but rather complements it. Boomers value the ability to stand on their own two feet, finding empowerment in self-sufficiency. By trusting their instincts and abilities, they cultivate an inner resilience that becomes a bedrock during times of emotional upheaval. Their approach to self-reliance is nuanced, balancing personal independence with meaningful connections. The "stiff upper lip" ethos is a legacy that Boomers carry, a cultural inheritance from previous generations. This mindset emphasizes the importance of maintaining composure and emotional restraint in public. While some might perceive it as outdated, for Boomers, it's a testament to resilience and dignity. They believe in the power of enduring adversity with grace, even if it means concealing their true feelings. However, this doesn't mean they lack emotional awareness. Instead, Boomers often save vulnerable moments for trusted confidants behind closed doors. They balance external composure with private emotional expression, ensuring their vulnerabilities are respected and protected. This duality allows them to navigate public and personal spheres with a sense of integrity and poise. For Boomers, actions often speak louder than words when it comes to expressing emotions. This preference stems from a belief in demonstrating care through tangible deeds rather than verbal affirmations. They might show affection by helping with a project, cooking a meal, or offering practical support, emphasizing the value of doing over saying. This focus on actions reflects their commitment to meaningful, impactful gestures. While some may interpret this as emotional reticence, it's actually a profound way of connecting. Boomers find comfort in the reliability of actions, which can sometimes be more enduring than fleeting words. This approach to emotional expression underscores their belief in the power of showing up and following through. It's a language of love and care that prioritizes sincerity and dedication. Family values hold a significant influence over how Boomers handle emotions, shaping their responses and priorities. Raised with an emphasis on familial duty and loyalty, they often view family as the cornerstone of their emotional world. This ingrained sense of responsibility guides their interactions, ensuring that family bonds are nurtured and preserved. It's a deeply embedded belief in the importance of family as a source of strength and support. These values translate into an emotional resilience rooted in familial connection. Boomers often turn to family during times of emotional upheaval, finding comfort in the shared experiences and understanding. The importance placed on family not only reinforces emotional bonds but also acts as a guiding compass in their decision-making. This enduring influence of family values is a testament to their commitment to emotional well-being and legacy. Boomers have mastered the art of distraction as a way to manage overwhelming emotions. They often engage in hobbies, physical activities, or volunteer work to redirect their focus and energy. This approach serves as a healthy coping mechanism, providing a temporary reprieve from emotional distress. By immersing themselves in activities that require concentration, they gain perspective and break the cycle of rumination. This method reflects their proactive stance on maintaining mental health and emotional balance. Boomers understand the value of stepping away, allowing for a reset before returning to face challenges with renewed clarity. Distraction, for them, is not about avoidance but about creating space for reflection and adjustment. It's a strategic pause that empowers them to return with a fresh mindset. Boomers often take a pragmatic approach to emotional expression, valuing practicality and logic in their interactions. This method involves assessing situations objectively, prioritizing reason over impulse. They strive to keep emotions in check, ensuring that their responses are well-considered and appropriate. This balanced approach reflects their preference for stability and rationality in emotional exchanges. While some might find this pragmatism detached, it's actually a means of maintaining clarity and perspective. Boomers believe in the power of addressing emotions constructively, avoiding unnecessary drama or escalation. They focus on finding solutions and compromises that satisfy all parties involved. This measured approach to emotional expression fosters open communication and mutual understanding. Humor serves as a potent tool for Boomers when navigating emotions, offering a lens to view situations with levity. They often use wit and humor to diffuse tense moments, creating a shared sense of relief and connection. This approach allows them to address serious topics with a light-hearted touch, fostering open dialogue without overwhelming intensity. Humor becomes a bridge, linking emotions with understanding and empathy. This use of humor reflects their resilience and adaptability in the face of emotional challenges. Boomers recognize that laughter can be a powerful antidote, alleviating stress and promoting camaraderie. By finding humor in life's complexities, they create a buffer that softens the impact of difficult emotions. It's a skill that transforms potential conflict into opportunities for connection and growth. For many Boomers, nature is a sanctuary that offers solace and rejuvenation in times of emotional turmoil. They often seek out natural settings, whether it's a walk in the park, a hike in the mountains, or a day at the beach, to find peace and clarity. This connection to nature provides a grounding presence, helping them to reset and recharge. Engaging with the natural world becomes a meditative practice that soothes the soul. This affinity for nature highlights their appreciation for simplicity and tranquility. Boomers value the quiet beauty of the outdoors as a counterbalance to the chaos of modern life. By immersing themselves in nature, they find a space where emotions can be processed organically and without judgment. It's a timeless refuge that nurtures their emotional well-being, offering a perspective that transcends the everyday hustle.
Yahoo
2 days ago
- Business
- Yahoo
Happy on the job? Your age could be why.
There's a vast gap in how happy workers are in their jobs between the oldest and youngest generations. While 57.4% of US workers under 25 report being satisfied with their jobs, that doesn't hold a candle to the 72.4% of those 55 and older who do, according to a report from The Conference Board. While the disparity between older and younger workers is notable, the sheer number of those who say "I love my job" is pretty stunning. Across the board, job satisfaction jumped 5.7 percentage points — the largest single-year gain in the survey's 38-year history. 'I'm surprised by the sharp jump in overall job satisfaction and maybe more surprised that we saw significant increases across the individual elements of job satisfaction,' Allan Schweyer, a principal researcher at The Conference Board, told Yahoo Finance. The survey measures a range of factors, including compensation, retirement and pension plans, sense of belonging, engagement, mental health, performance feedback, workload, hybrid flexibility, quality of leadership, and growth opportunities. The elements that make the most difference when it comes to loving your job are interest in work, followed closely by quality of leadership, organizational culture, workload, and workers' relationships with their supervisors. He said those factors mattered more to people than the value they placed on wages, bonuses, health insurance, and vacation pay. Gains were particularly strong for women workers, increasing by more than 8 percentage points. Women, though, continue to be less satisfied than men with their wages, bonus plans, and pension and retirement plans. Workers who earn six-figure salaries are somewhat more satisfied than those earning less. And workers in hybrid work arrangements are consistently more satisfied and likely to stay. Let's turn back to the older vs. younger disconnect. There are some underlying reasons for the difference in opinion. For starters — although who doesn't value manageable workloads and meaningful work — late-career employees prioritize these elements of a job at higher levels than younger colleagues, according to the researchers. But it goes deeper. 'In general, the older workers we work with are more hopeful, more determined, less frustrated,' Gwenn Rosener, partner and co-founder of FlexProfessionals, a recruiting and staffing firm for the Boston and Washington, D.C., areas, told Yahoo Finance. 'After years of navigating good and bad bosses, jobs, and economies, they are pretty realistic, resilient, and more satisfied,' she said. 'They have more tempered expectations about what a job should provide. They're not chasing the weighty ideal of changing the world like many in the younger generations. They want to contribute, feel valued, and enjoy their work, and, after years in the workforce, they know where they fit.' For the younger set, the fear of the unknown may have them rattled. 'Younger workers have begun to experience a tougher job market over the past year or two,' Schweyer said. 'New college graduates have a very high rate of underemployment. Their ability to improve pay and work experience by switching jobs has eroded as well.' It is also possible that younger workers are missing out on the benefits of working in an office, he added. By subscribing, you are agreeing to Yahoo's Terms and Privacy Policy I reached out to a handful of workers 55 and over to hear first-hand how happy they are with their work and why that is. 'What makes work so satisfying for me at this stage of my career is not only that the job itself is interesting to me, but it's a small organization that values my experience,' Tom Pavilon, 63, a strategic account manager for a Boston scouting firm, told Yahoo Finance. But it's the psychological cool that comes with years on the job that is a powerful component. 'At this age, you've seen it all, so things that used to get you worked up don't anymore,' Pavilon said. 'Certain behaviors that still exist in the workplace, you shake your head at. And there are things that younger workers think are blowing up the world that you know aren't. Having that perspective makes the work more fulfilling because you're not letting the noise bother you.'For Paula Harper, 56, who lives in northern Virginia and works part-time as a virtual executive assistant to an association president, her work 'keeps her plugged in, and the stress level is low.' That's in sharp contrast to her two-plus decades working full-time in higher education administration. Harper stepped out of the workforce for six years to be a caregiver for a family member. 'I am just dipping my toe back in this year, and the work now gives me a little bit of something that's my own, but at the same time, I don't have to have the pressure of a full-time, mid- or high-level role. I can stay in the game and make some small contributions. 'The biggest point: I'm doing something,' she added, noting that finding work wasn't easy after her break. One caveat about these happy workers that shouldn't be ignored: Employers and workers are on pins and needles these days. 'Job satisfaction may remain high for now because the economy, wage gains, and employment have stayed robust,' Schweyer said. 'If the uncertainty turns into recession and much higher unemployment, satisfaction is likely to drop significantly." Kerry Hannon is a Senior Columnist at Yahoo Finance. She is a career and retirement strategist and the author of 14 books, including the forthcoming "Retirement Bites: A Gen X Guide to Securing Your Financial Future," "In Control at 50+: How to Succeed in the New World of Work" and "Never Too Old to Get Rich." Follow her on Bluesky. Sign up for the Mind Your Money newsletter Error in retrieving data Sign in to access your portfolio Error in retrieving data Error in retrieving data Error in retrieving data Error in retrieving data
Yahoo
3 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
I've been in an arranged marriage for 18 years. Our relationship works because we see the world differently.
When I was 23 I agreed to an arranged marriage with a man who was eight years older than me. Through the years, I've realized that our differences are what makes us a strong couple. We've learned how to live and grow together, lessons I hope our kids are learning, too. At 23, while finishing my MBA, I agreed to an arranged marriage. My husband was eight years older, and we didn't know each other well when we said yes. There was no dramatic love story — just mutual respect, family introductions, and a quiet decision to give this partnership a chance. In many ways, we approached life very differently. He's Gen X. I'm a millennial, the kind whose energy leans into Gen Z territory. I was full of ambition — constantly planning, striving, measuring progress in visible ways. My husband had ambition too, but his was quieter, more inward. He wasn't chasing milestones like I was; he valued stability and contentment. I'm expressive, quick to react, and constantly questioning things. He's quieter, more rooted in a time where people didn't always talk about their feelings or challenge every rule. The generational gap isn't dramatic, but it shows at times. I see it in how we argue, how we manage stress, and how we make decisions. I was the kind of person who tracked everything including our kids' grades, the car we drove, the schools we applied to. I had a plan, and I wanted it to unfold just right. He was fine if it didn't. For a long time, I assumed we had to think alike to connect. But I've come to see that it's our contrast, not our similarity, that makes us stronger. My husband brought a kind of composure to my life that I didn't know I needed. He never dismissed my drive, but he reminded me (always gently) that it was okay not to control every kids didn't have to score at least 90% on every exam. That missing out on a particular milestone wasn't a crisis. He didn't ask me to dim my ambition. He just helped me see that not everything in life had to be a race, something to win, control, or finish quickly. And that was a kind of freedom I didn't realize I was missing. I've always expressed emotions loudly, whether it's joy or frustration. My husband is more reserved. For years, I mistook his silence for detachment. I couldn't understand why he didn't or wouldn't match my intensity. One day, during an argument, he held me by the shoulders, looked me in the eye, and said quietly, "Please understand. I'm not a woman. I don't process things the way you do. I never will." It wasn't an excuse. It was a truth. That moment shifted something for me. His way of feeling wasn't smaller, just quieter. And once I stopped looking for a mirror, I started noticing the ways he did show love in steadiness and in small, consistent acts. We've been married for 18 years and still argue — sometimes often. We parent differently. We see priorities through different lenses. There are days we get on each other's nerves, and days we can't stop laughing. But we've figured out how to disagree without tearing things apart. We give each other space. We pick our battles. We move on. Love isn't always a steady flame. Sometimes it flickers. Sometimes it flares. But we've kept it lit — not through grand gestures, but through a quiet, daily commitment to keep showing up. He grounds me when I spiral. I push him to open up when he retreats. When I'm overwhelmed, he brings calm. When he's tired or stretched thin, I step in often handling the emotional load, daily logistics, and sometimes even the smaller financial extras. I'm usually the one managing football lessons, birthday parties, and spontaneous pizza nights. He takes care of other the bigger responsibilities like managing household bills, school fees, and making sure things keep running smoothly at home and beyond. Nearly 18 years and three kids later, I hope our children see something valuable in what we've built. They've grown up witnessing our dynamic up close — two people with very different views learning how to live and grow together. What I hope they carry with them is simple but lasting: that love and respect can exist even when opinions differ. And when they're with their own partners one day, I hope they know it's okay to think differently, to see the world through different lenses. We see the world differently — and maybe that's exactly why we work. Like puzzle pieces that don't look alike but fit together, we fill in each other's gaps to make something whole. I now believe that's what a lasting marriage is: not perfect harmony, but a shared rhythm. Sometimes clumsy, sometimes graceful, but always grounded in trust, mutual respect, and the quiet choice to stay in it, together. Read the original article on Business Insider
Yahoo
3 days ago
- Business
- Yahoo
Happy on the job? Your age could be why.
There's a vast gap in how happy workers are in their jobs between the oldest and youngest generations. While 57.4% of US workers under 25 report being satisfied with their jobs, that doesn't hold a candle to the 72.4% of those 55 and older who do, according to a report from The Conference Board. While the disparity between older and younger workers is notable, the sheer number of those who say "I love my job" is pretty stunning. Across the board, job satisfaction jumped 5.7 percentage points — the largest single-year gain in the survey's 38-year history. 'I'm surprised by the sharp jump in overall job satisfaction and maybe more surprised that we saw significant increases across the individual elements of job satisfaction,' Allan Schweyer, a principal researcher at The Conference Board, told Yahoo Finance. The survey measures a range of factors, including compensation, retirement and pension plans, sense of belonging, engagement, mental health, performance feedback, workload, hybrid flexibility, quality of leadership, and growth opportunities. The elements that make the most difference when it comes to loving your job are interest in work, followed closely by quality of leadership, organizational culture, workload, and workers' relationships with their supervisors. He said those factors mattered more to people than the value they placed on wages, bonuses, health insurance, and vacation pay. Gains were particularly strong for women workers, increasing by more than 8 percentage points. Women, though, continue to be less satisfied than men with their wages, bonus plans, and pension and retirement plans. Workers who earn six-figure salaries are somewhat more satisfied than those earning less. And workers in hybrid work arrangements are consistently more satisfied and likely to stay. Let's turn back to the older vs. younger disconnect. There are some underlying reasons for the difference in opinion. For starters — although who doesn't value manageable workloads and meaningful work — late-career employees prioritize these elements of a job at higher levels than younger colleagues, according to the researchers. But it goes deeper. 'In general, the older workers we work with are more hopeful, more determined, less frustrated,' Gwenn Rosener, partner and co-founder of FlexProfessionals, a recruiting and staffing firm for the Boston and Washington, D.C., areas, told Yahoo Finance. 'After years of navigating good and bad bosses, jobs, and economies, they are pretty realistic, resilient, and more satisfied,' she said. 'They have more tempered expectations about what a job should provide. They're not chasing the weighty ideal of changing the world like many in the younger generations. They want to contribute, feel valued, and enjoy their work, and, after years in the workforce, they know where they fit.' For the younger set, the fear of the unknown may have them rattled. 'Younger workers have begun to experience a tougher job market over the past year or two,' Schweyer said. 'New college graduates have a very high rate of underemployment. Their ability to improve pay and work experience by switching jobs has eroded as well.' It is also possible that younger workers are missing out on the benefits of working in an office, he added. By subscribing, you are agreeing to Yahoo's Terms and Privacy Policy I reached out to a handful of workers 55 and over to hear first-hand how happy they are with their work and why that is. 'What makes work so satisfying for me at this stage of my career is not only that the job itself is interesting to me, but it's a small organization that values my experience,' Tom Pavilon, 63, a strategic account manager for a Boston scouting firm, told Yahoo Finance. But it's the psychological cool that comes with years on the job that is a powerful component. 'At this age, you've seen it all, so things that used to get you worked up don't anymore,' Pavilon said. 'Certain behaviors that still exist in the workplace, you shake your head at. And there are things that younger workers think are blowing up the world that you know aren't. Having that perspective makes the work more fulfilling because you're not letting the noise bother you.'For Paula Harper, 56, who lives in northern Virginia and works part-time as a virtual executive assistant to an association president, her work 'keeps her plugged in, and the stress level is low.' That's in sharp contrast to her two-plus decades working full-time in higher education administration. Harper stepped out of the workforce for six years to be a caregiver for a family member. 'I am just dipping my toe back in this year, and the work now gives me a little bit of something that's my own, but at the same time, I don't have to have the pressure of a full-time, mid- or high-level role. I can stay in the game and make some small contributions. 'The biggest point: I'm doing something,' she added, noting that finding work wasn't easy after her break. One caveat about these happy workers that shouldn't be ignored: Employers and workers are on pins and needles these days. 'Job satisfaction may remain high for now because the economy, wage gains, and employment have stayed robust,' Schweyer said. 'If the uncertainty turns into recession and much higher unemployment, satisfaction is likely to drop significantly." Kerry Hannon is a Senior Columnist at Yahoo Finance. She is a career and retirement strategist and the author of 14 books, including the forthcoming "Retirement Bites: A Gen X Guide to Securing Your Financial Future," "In Control at 50+: How to Succeed in the New World of Work" and "Never Too Old to Get Rich." Follow her on Bluesky. Sign up for the Mind Your Money newsletter
Yahoo
20-06-2025
- Lifestyle
- Yahoo
13 Common Phrases People Over 60 Use Without Realizing How Outdated They Sound
13 Common Phrases People Over 60 Use Without Realizing How Outdated They Sound originally appeared on Parade. Language is a wonderfully curious thing—always growing, always shape-shifting. Even when two people are from the same area, the way they use words can feel like different dialects from parallel worlds, especially across generations. For instance, a saying that once sparkled with relevance might now land with a puzzled blink when it's used, quietly revealing the era it came from at the same time. If you're curious what some expressions and sentences might fall into that, keep reading because we're revealing 13 common phrases people over 60 use without realizing how outdated they Dr. Jenny Shields, the founder of Shields Psychology & Consulting and Dr. Patricia Dixon of the podcast Healing Mentalit-Tea helped us round them up. They both not only call out certain phrases, but they also explain what they mean in case you're confused. Beyond decoding their original intent, they take it a step further by offering modern-day equivalents, giving helpful insight into how language has shifted and what expressions people might be using today out all of the outdated phrases below and see if you are guilty of using them, have ever heard them before or know someone who still uses them in their everyday vocab. You may be surprised to find out which ones our experts 'This phrase has been around for centuries—and it sounds like it!' Dr. Shields stresses. 'The message is solid: handle it now before it snowballs. But for younger people hearing it, it can sound like a folksy nudge from someone's great-aunt rather than a helpful reminder.''Today's generation might say something like, 'Nip it in the bud,' which has a similar vibe, but sounds a bit more modern,' Dr. Dixon explains. 'I've always understood this older phrase to mean that fixing a small problem right away can prevent it from turning into a bigger mess later—whether it's in relationships, business or even just keeping your house organized. The idea is that addressing issues early on saves you from having to do nine more stitches down the line.'Related: "If you've never used a pager, this phrase can land as a little out of touch,' Dr. Shields explains.'This outdated phrase basically means, 'Reach out if you need anything,' Dr. Dixon reveals. 'It's a polite way of saying, 'Let me know if I can help.' Nowadays, people might say, 'Hit me up if you need to' or 'Text me if you need me," which are both more casual and more immediate.' Ummm, what?! If you haven't heard this dated expression, Dr. Shields is breaking it down.'This phrase used to be about grit and self-reliance, but today it can come across as dismissive or disconnected,' she tells Parade. 'It assumes everyone starts from the same place, with equal access to support, time and stability.' 'This was a gentle way of saying, 'I'll tentatively schedule you,'' Dr. Dixon says. 'Today, people might say, 'I'll hit you up,' or 'OK, I've got you locked in.' It's all about keeping things flexible but still making sure it happens—just with a little more digital flair.' 'This classic saying used by people 60 or older means that being kind and friendly gets you farther than being sour or aggressive,' Dr. Dixon points out. 'It's about the power of kindness over harshness. Today's slang might include phrases like, 'That's a vibe' or 'Kindness over clout,' focusing on authenticity and positivity over negativity.'Related: 'This phrase used by people over 60 is a straightforward way of saying you've left a message, but let's be honest—answering machines are almost a thing of the past nowadays, which is why this is outdated," Dr. Dixon notes. "Now, we'd say, 'Check your messages' or 'I DM'ed you,' which is way more current and digital-friendly.' 'This outdated phrase has long been used to explain playful or impulsive behavior, often without harm intended,' Dr. Shields shares. 'However, today, with greater awareness around bullying, aggression and consent, it can unintentionally excuse actions that deserve to be taken seriously. Most parents and grandparents want to raise boys who are kind, respectful and accountable. Letting go of this phrase doesn't limit boys. It affirms how much we believe in who they're becoming.'Related: Not sure what this means? That's because "taping" something is pretty much a thing of the past.'This used to be a common way to ask someone to record a TV show on a VCR—back when we actually owned tapes and knew what a VCR was!' Dr. Dixon Shields adds, 'This outdated phrase reminds us how quickly the world has changed. If you're talking with someone younger, updating your wording a bit can help keep them in the moment with you, instead of trying to decode the reference.'Dr. Dixon agrees, telling Parade, 'These days, someone would probably just ask, 'Which streaming service is it on?' instead.' 'This phrase was once a compliment, meant to recognize women who built professional lives outside the home,' Dr. Shields says. 'Though, today it can sound outdated or even patronizing, as if a woman's ambition still needs to be called out or labeled. Younger generations expect women to have full careers, and pointing it out can make it feel exceptional when it's simply normal. It also reduces someone's identity to their job, rather than seeing them as a whole person.' If you're confused by this method of payment, it's because it was more common with other generations. That's why our experts say it's an outdated phrase in today's world.'That was a classic question from a time when writing checks was the norm,' Dr. Dixon states. 'The modern version of that statement would be something like, 'Can I Zelle or Cash App you?' It's much quicker and more digital-friendly.'Related: 'Someone 60 or older might use this as it means splitting the bill, which was the polite way to say 'We're sharing this,'" Dr. Dixon explains. "Today's generation might say, 'Let's split this' or 'Let's go half on this.' It's a little more straightforward and less formal, but just as clear.' This outdated phrase was often meant to express kindness or fairness, with the intent of saying, 'I treat everyone the same.'' Dr. Shields explains. 'However, if used today, for many people of color, it can feel like their identity and lived experience are being erased. The truth is, race often shapes the way people move through the world. What builds trust isn't pretending we're all the same. It's saying, 'I see your difference and I respect it.'' 'This old saying was meant to remind people not to toss out something valuable just because it's mixed in with something difficult,' Dr. Shields notes. 'Today, it can sound a little outdated or even a bit dismissive when someone is voicing frustration or rethinking how things have always been done. The heart of the message still holds, but younger folks might hear it as, 'Don't make a fuss.'' Up Next:Dr. Jenny Shields, psychologist, the founder of Shields Psychology & Consulting Dr. Patricia Dixon, psychologist, of the podcast Healing Mentalit-Tea 13 Common Phrases People Over 60 Use Without Realizing How Outdated They Sound first appeared on Parade on Jun 19, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Jun 19, 2025, where it first appeared.
