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Yahoo
a day ago
- General
- Yahoo
People Who Were Spoiled As Children Act Like This As Adults
Feeling overly pampered as a child might have seemed like a dream come true back in the day, but it can shape some less-than-ideal adult behaviors. If you were constantly indulged, chances are certain habits have carried over into your grown-up life. Here's a quick dive into how being spoiled as a kid might be showing up in your adult life. You might find it hard to wait for things, expecting instant results and getting frustrated when they don't come. This is a classic carry-over from childhood when your every wish was granted at the drop of a hat. Your impatience tends to manifest in various areas, from waiting in line to expecting quick fixes in your personal and professional relationships. According to Walter Mischel's famous marshmallow test study, the ability to delay gratification is linked to better life outcomes, suggesting that patience is indeed a virtue worth cultivating. On the flip side, learning to manage your expectations can make a significant difference. Practicing patience can lead to more meaningful accomplishments and relationships. It's about rewiring your mindset to appreciate the process rather than just the outcome. Taking small steps to practice patience daily can eventually lead to a more satisfying life experience. Being spoiled as a child often leads to a sense of entitlement in adulthood. You might expect things to be handed to you without putting in the necessary effort. This mindset can create friction in the workplace and in personal relationships. People may perceive you as demanding or uncooperative, which can lead to conflicts. To counteract this, it's essential to develop a sense of gratitude and accountability. Recognize that the world doesn't owe you anything, and focus on what you can bring to the table. Embrace the idea that effort and dedication are key to achieving your goals. By adjusting your expectations, you can foster more fulfilling interactions and accomplishments. Spoiled children often grow up without understanding the true value of money. As adults, this can manifest as impulsive spending and poor financial planning. A study by Dr. Brad Klontz, a psychologist and financial planner, found that people who were spoiled as children are more likely to struggle with money management in adulthood. They may see money as a limitless resource, leading to financial instability. To improve your financial habits, start by setting clear budgeting goals and tracking your spending. Understanding where your money goes can help you make more informed decisions. Educate yourself on financial literacy topics like saving, investing, and debt management. Taking control of your finances can lead to greater stability and peace of mind. Spoiled children often grow up in environments where they rarely face criticism, which can make dealing with it as adults quite challenging. Hearing negative feedback might feel like a personal attack rather than constructive insight. According to Dr. Carol Dweck, a psychology professor at Stanford University, embracing a growth mindset can help individuals view criticism as an opportunity for development rather than a threat. This shift in perspective can transform how you respond to feedback. Instead of getting defensive, try to see criticism as a learning tool. Analyze what's being said without taking it personally, and assess how it can help you improve. You'll find that accepting and integrating feedback can lead to better outcomes in your personal and professional life. This ability to adapt will make you more resilient and open-minded. If you grew up spoiled, chances are you're used to constant praise and validation. As an adult, you may find yourself seeking approval to feel good about your accomplishments. This can become problematic because it puts your self-worth in the hands of others. Instead of internally validating your achievements, you may constantly look for the thumbs-up from colleagues, friends, or family. To counteract this tendency, start recognizing and celebrating your victories, no matter how small they may seem. Building self-confidence is about acknowledging your growth and progress independently of others' opinions. It's crucial to set personal benchmarks and appreciate the journey. The more you rely on your own judgment, the less you'll need external validation. Having been spoiled as a child might make it difficult for you to understand and respect boundaries in relationships. You may inadvertently overstep and expect others to cater to your needs, just as they did when you were younger. This can lead to imbalances and frustrations in your personal connections. It's crucial to recognize the importance of mutual respect and boundary-setting in healthy relationships. Begin by listening and observing how others establish their boundaries. Practice setting your own limits by communicating them clearly and respectfully. Remember that boundaries are essential for both parties to feel comfortable and respected. Over time, respecting boundaries will become second nature and enrich your relationships. If you grew up with everything done for you, it's likely that you might avoid taking responsibility as an adult. This could mean dodging tasks and commitments or even blaming others when things go wrong. A study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that taking responsibility for one's actions correlates positively with life satisfaction. Embracing responsibility can lead to personal growth and improved relationships. Start by acknowledging your role in situations, whether positive or negative. Accepting accountability can be empowering and liberating. It allows you to learn from mistakes and take control of your life. Taking small steps toward responsibility can lead to significant changes in your confidence and decision-making skills. Being spoiled might have led you to act without thinking, indulging in whims and desires. As an adult, this impulsiveness can be detrimental, leading to rash decisions and regrettable outcomes. Impulsivity might manifest in various forms, from making hasty financial choices to jumping into relationships without due consideration. This behavior can hinder long-term satisfaction and stability. To combat impulsiveness, practice pausing and reflecting before making decisions. Consider the potential consequences and weigh the pros and cons. Developing self-control and mindfulness can help you make more thoughtful choices. Over time, this can lead to more fulfilling and stable outcomes in various aspects of your life. Growing up spoiled can sometimes result in difficulty empathizing with others. Having been the center of attention, you might not readily consider others' needs or feelings. This lack of empathy can impact personal and professional relationships, as you may struggle to connect and understand different perspectives. It's important to cultivate empathy for healthier and more meaningful interactions. Start by actively listening to others and trying to see situations from their point of view. Engage in conversations that challenge your perspective and encourage you to think beyond your own experiences. Practicing empathy can transform your interactions and deepen your connections with others. You'll find that understanding and responding to others' needs enriches your relationships. Having been treated as special during your formative years might lead you to expect preferential treatment as an adult. This can create unrealistic expectations in various areas of your life, from work to social situations. Others might perceive you as arrogant or self-centered, leading to misunderstandings and conflicts. It's important to recognize that everyone deserves equal treatment and respect. To adjust this mindset, practice humility and view situations from a collective perspective. Appreciate the contributions of others and understand that everyone's role is valuable. By focusing on collaboration rather than personal gain, you'll build stronger, more cooperative relationships. This shift in attitude can lead to more fulfilling and harmonious interactions. If you were used to getting your way as a child, compromising as an adult might be challenging. You might hold firm to your desires and find it hard to meet others halfway. This rigidity can create tension in relationships, as collaboration often requires flexibility and understanding. Learning to compromise is essential for maintaining healthy, balanced relationships. Begin by recognizing that compromise doesn't mean losing; it's about finding common ground. Approach situations with an open mind and a willingness to listen. By valuing others' perspectives and being adaptable, you'll foster mutual respect and cooperation. This skill will enhance your interactions and lead to more satisfying resolutions. Spoiled children might grow up with the belief that anything is possible, which can morph into difficulty accepting limitations as adults. You might set unrealistic goals or feel frustrated when faced with obstacles. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy or disappointment when reality doesn't align with your expectations. Embracing limitations, however, is a crucial part of personal growth and resilience. To address this, start by setting realistic goals and acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses. Accept that limitations are not failures but opportunities for growth and learning. Embrace challenges as chances to develop new skills and perspectives. This approach will help you navigate life's complexities with grace and determination. Growing up spoiled might mean you're used to others handling things for you, which can impact your independence as an adult. You might find it challenging to tackle tasks or make decisions on your own. This reliance on others can hinder your personal growth and confidence. Embracing independence is essential for leading a fulfilling and self-sufficient life. Start by taking small steps toward self-reliance, such as managing your daily tasks or making decisions independently. Each achievement, no matter how minor, will boost your confidence and encourage further independence. By gradually building your capabilities, you'll feel more empowered and in control of your life. Independence will become a rewarding journey toward self-discovery and achievement.


Gizmodo
12-05-2025
- Science
- Gizmodo
New Twist on Famous Marshmallow Test: What Happens When You Add a Second Kid?
Our commitments to other people can have a big influence on how we act—even for children who are trying to keep themselves from snacking on a tasty treat right now. Peer support helped children pass the famous Stanford marshmallow test, which tests whether a child can resist a tempting treat long enough to receive an even bigger, better reward, according to a new study. The study, published May 7 in Royal Society Open Science, found that children are more likely to wait for a larger reward if they have a buddy who has pledged to hold out than if they're alone. The findings show that promises can be a pretty powerful influence on people's behavior, echoing previous studies that have found that explicit vows make children less likely to cheat and more likely to tell the truth. The original marshmallow test, conducted at Stanford in the 1970s, was fairly simple and exceptionally cute. An experimenter placed a marshmallow or other treat in front of a child before leaving them alone in a room. The experimenter told the child that if the marshmallow was still there when the experimenter returned, the child would get double the tasty treats. Follow-up studies found that children who 'passed' the marshmallow test by waiting until the experimenter returned had better outcomes later in life. But later studies challenged these findings, showing children who gobbled up the smaller reward were more likely to come from challenging homes and circumstances that may have made them less likely to trust adults. So, their relative levels of success later in life might have reflected the environment in which they were raised, not any intrinsic qualities. In the new study, a team of researchers, including psychologist Owen Waddington from the University of Manchester, sought to determine how interactions with others impacted a child's ability to wait for a better reward. 'Successful cooperation often relies, in part, on individuals maintaining delayed gratification,' the scientists wrote in the study. 'This sense of obligation can also lead to increased effort, and therefore increased cooperative success.' Researchers conducted the experiments online and paired each child with another child. The new experiments were conducted with children aged 5 to 6 years old and their parents. From their homes, a parent showed their child a familiar treat. The child was told that they would get an even better treat if and only if another child also waited for a larger treat under the same circumstances. The experimenters fibbed about a 'malfunctioning' Zoom link, which allowed participants to see the other child but not interact or communicate with them. Participants were shown a video of the child they were paired with. The other child either promised that they wouldn't eat the treat or expressed uncertainty about whether they could wait. The study showed that when one child promised to hold out, the other child waited longer before eating the treat than if their partner had expressed uncertainty. It turns out that promises can mean a lot, even for children. Compared to previous studies involving the marshmallow test, this study 'goes further to show that when a partner promises to wait for their treat, children's willingness to delay gratification is greater than when the partner expresses uncertainty,' the authors wrote. Younger children were more likely to last the whole time than older children, though the difference was not statistically significant. The authors wrote that this might be because with age, 'children encounter more broken promises and learn that commitments are not always fulfilled.' The findings indicate that promises promote cooperation in children, echoing earlier experiments in addiction research that buddy systems can prevent relapses. But the authors caution that they may not apply to all children, as the studies were mainly conducted on healthy children in northern England. Whether these findings apply to children across other cultures isn't clear yet. It seems a simple promise goes a long way.