Latest news with #parentsupport
Daily Mail
06-07-2025
- Health
- Daily Mail
Expert reveals how to comfort your teens after the 'post-exam emotional slump'
As exam season ends across the UK, many parents expect their teens to come home breathing a sigh of relief, but for some students, the finish line brings a sense of exhaustion. According to Lindsey Wright, who is a child learning specialist and Senior Tutor at leading education platform Tutors Valley, this post-exam emotional slump is far more common than many parents realise and it has both biological and psychological roots. 'A lot of students feel totally lost when the pressure lifts,' Lindsey explains. 'They've been in survival mode for so long and, once it ends, they don't know what to do with themselves. Some even feel guilty for not feeling happier.' While it can be unsettling to see your child experience this emotional dip, the good news it there are things you can do to help them reset. Lindsey revealed parents can help comfort their teens with five easy steps, including letting them sleep in and encouraging them to do some exercise. Meanwhile the expert stressed how important it is to 'praise their efforts' instead of focusing too much on results. She explained: 'The first step is simply recognising and validating how they feel. Let them know it's normal to feel a bit lost or low after a major event like this.' Next, Lindsey warned to avoid rushing to 'fix' the mood or dismissing it with 'you should be happy now' messaging. Instead, listen and let them speak openly. As we know, exercise boosts serotonin, which helps regulate mood, energy and well-being and this can be used to their advantage if feeling low. She said: 'You don't have to send them to the gym. A walk, a bike ride, or even something like swimming can help release stress and improve their mood.' Meanwhile Lindsey revealed that exams often come with significant sleep debt, which can worsen mood, anxiety and cognition. She said: 'Let your teen catch up - but aim for a balanced routine. Short-term catch-up sleep, including naps, can help. But restoring a regular sleep pattern is better for long-term mental health.' Elsewhere she added that students should be encouraged to reconnect with things that brought them joy before revision took over; that might be an old hobby, a creative outlet, or time with friends. Lindsey said: 'Even a small environmental change, like rearranging their room or taking a family day trip can help to mark the transition and take them away from a space they've been associating with stress.' Finally, avoid focusing solely on future results and make sure to praise the effort and resilience they've shown, regardless of what the grades might be. She added: 'Students need to hear that their value isn't tied to exam grades. If they learn that now, it will help protect their mental health far beyond this exam season.' Why some students feel worse after exams Post-exam blues are a well-documented phenomenon but they often catch students and parents off guard. Lindsey points to several causes: Cortisol crash During exam season, the body produces high levels of cortisol, a stress hormone that helps students stay alert and focused. But once the immediate pressure ends, the sudden drop in cortisol can lead to mental fatigue, disrupted sleep cycles, and a general sense of emotional 'crash.' 'It's like the body's been running on adrenaline and now it's empty. We expect a feeling of triumph, but many feel deflated instead.' Burnout from preparation The intense build-up to exams often includes months of revision, a lot of pressure, and possibly some sleep deprivation. This level of sustained stress leaves students physically and mentally exhausted - often too drained to enjoy their freedom. Anxiety about results Even when exams are over, the outcome still looms. Many students become preoccupied with 'what ifs,' worrying about missed questions, imagining worst-case scenarios, or obsessively comparing their performance to others. Perfectionism and self-criticism Students with perfectionist tendencies may find themselves ruminating over every answer, replaying their decisions, and focusing more on perceived mistakes than on the effort they put in. 'We see students who did brilliantly by any standard, but they're upset because they didn't answer one question perfectly'. Peer pressure and comparison culture Even after the exams are done, many students stay locked into competitive thinking. Social media posts and casual conversations about how others felt they did can intensify stress and prevent them from properly relaxing. Cultural and identity pressures In the UK and other academic cultures, achievement is often tied to identity and self-worth. The pressure to succeed can leave students feeling like exam results define their value, whether it's from parents, teachers, peers, or internalised expectations.
Forbes
30-06-2025
- General
- Forbes
Survey Says…Parents Matter In College Admission And They Feel It Is Rigged
Parents' Three-Word Descriptions of College Admission Even if you are not a follower of the long-running game show, Family Feud, you have no doubt heard their 'survey says' tagline. In the game, families compete by guessing the answers to survey questions on a range of topics, and it gets rowdy! College admission often feels like a similar face-off between families, leaving them confused, concerned, and conjecturing. It is not an solitary process where applicants must find their way without support. Experience has shown the critical role of parents in postsecondary planning. After all, we love our kids and want a future for them that is full of success. We also don't want them living in our basement for eternity! Recent surveys reveal, however, just how nuanced and complex this planning process is for parents to navigate. While high school counselors are the most qualified to offer students guidance on college admission and career pathways, they have a herculean job. They often have caseloads drastically exceeding the American School Counselor Association (ASCA) recommended student-to-counselor ratio of 250:1. Counselors are balancing the physical, intellectual, and social-emotional well-being of the students with whom they work, and despite the best intentions, their time and resources are limited. Sadly there are systemic failures. A recent survey from the Niche college search platform found that 1 in 5 juniors never meet with their school counselors, with 17% saying they received no guidance on the college search process. This is consistent with the findings of a 2019 Education Trust report. The reality is that even those of us (I am a high school counselor) who are fortunate to have smaller caseloads are not available 24/7. I am not at the kitchen table on Sunday morning or in the car with families on a summer night when they are often discussing college admission. Who is? Parents, but they often feel left out of the equation. A survey conducted by the American Student Assistance (ASA) found that parents have the greatest influence on their child's post-secondary path. Ninety-one percent of student respondents reported that they discussed their post-high school plans with their parents. Research by the enrollment management firm EAB confirms the ASA findings–the majority of students identify family as the greatest influence on which pathway they plan to pursue. But parents are not getting the information they want and need. A 2024 EAB study found that 73% of parents want direct communications from colleges. It also discovered that students who are not responding to outreach campaigns from colleges have a 47% greater likelihood of applying when a college has their parent contact information. Michael Koppenheffer, vice president of Enroll360 Marketing at EAB says, 'In an era of intensive parenting, it's not surprising that most parents expect direct and transparent communication from colleges. Concerns about cost, value, and campus safety are top of mind for today's parents, and our research shows that many parents now look for open, ongoing dialogue with institutions throughout the college search process. Colleges that engage families early across multiple channels build trust, ultimately influencing where students choose to enroll.' A May survey conducted by College Guidance Network (with whom I work) revealed not just a lack of communication, but also a significant trust deficit. Sixty-five percent of parents report that the system feels rigged against them and they are pleading for transparency, fairness, and insight into how to play the admissions game. While hoping for fairness may be a fool's errand (the process is simply not built for this), transparency and insight are reasonable expectations. Survey respondents volunteer words like "stressful," "confusing," 'tedious,' and "expensive" to describe college admission, and negative associations outnumber positive terms six to one. These attitudes are consistent across income level, school type (private/public/charter), and first‑generation status. Only 11% of parents report feeling 'very confident' guiding their student through the admission process and 63% say they are struggling, missing details, or need extensive guidance. The top concern of parents is that their teen is 'not competing on a level playing field,' followed closely by fear of making costly financial mistakes. As chief product officer at College Guidance Network (CGN), Michael Kolowich designed and conducted the survey of a national sample of 602 parents. He observes that 'college admissions has evolved over time from a straight sprint to a kind of escape room: the clues are scattered everywhere, but parents don't have a master key to solve the puzzle." CGN's research revealed four distinct parent mindsets that can help colleges better understand their concerns and needs: Anxious Planners, Confident Navigators, Skeptical Realists, and Hands-Off Hopefuls. Every one of them is hunting for a different kind of key to solve the puzzle. Here's more on the four segments the survey identified: Parent engagement strategies in high schools and colleges should incorporate the unique needs and concerns that characterize each of these styles. By doing so they will not only provide important guidance to those who are often the primary financial stakeholder, but as the EAB research found, colleges will also increase the likelihood that students in their inquiry funnel will apply. Parents are not just hungry for information about traditional four-year colleges. Judy Goldstein is the senior vice president of communications for American Student Assistance (ASA). She says, 'Nearly 90% of parents are interested in learning more about non-degree pathways for their children, and two in five want schools to start advising students about their post-secondary options as early as middle school,' Goldstein adds, 'Overall, there is a need for widespread access to the information, resources, and experiences focused on diverse post-secondary education and career pathways earlier in students' educational journeys. Doing so will ensure that young people–and their families–are equipped to make informed, confident decisions about the path after high school that meets their needs and aspirations.' The take-home message from all of these surveys is that we need to better support parents who often feel like they are flying without instruments. K-12 schools need to start earlier and be adequately funded to provide the resources necessary, not just for students but for parents as well. Colleges and universities must better understand the needs of parents and others who support applicants and find more effective ways to connect and communicate with them early and often. If not, families will continue to feud and make uninformed guesses as they navigate the escape room of college admission.
