10-07-2025
This sleeping pill turned me into a drug addict in my 60s
The day I realised I was a drug addict was heartbreaking. For four years, I was completely reliant on a daily pill to function and I'm embarrassed to admit that I never thought anything of it. From the outside, I was a normal woman in her mid-sixties – friendly and straightforward, with a nice home, a cat and a stable job in the NHS. It was only when my daily dose of Zopiclone – a sedative sleeping pill – was suddenly taken away that I realised I was in a situation no better than being an alcoholic.
For years, I lived happily in the USA with my husband and worked in a hospital job which I loved. However, I left it all behind to return to the UK when my father's Alzheimer's worsened. He wasn't receiving good care and, as his only child, I felt solely responsible for his health and comfort. My husband was dealing with his own family issues in the USA so we made the heartbreaking decision to separate. We still loved each other but had to prioritise our caring responsibilities. For two years, I helped to look after my dad before he sadly passed away.
After his death, there wasn't anything left for me in the UK. As much as I wanted to return to the USA, my husband and I had drifted apart and we had decided to divorce. My green card had expired and I never took citizenship. I could've retired, however I decided to keep working because I loved keeping busy and surrounding myself with people. I moved to Staffordshire and began working as an executive assistant in the NHS, which was demanding but very rewarding.
The beginning of my insomnia
My struggles with insomnia began shortly after I found a lump in my breast in 2015. I was fast-tracked through the NHS and diagnosed with breast cancer. As I went through the surgery, radiation, and treatment process, I felt very lonely and some of my colleagues at work became my vital support system. After a brutal round of radiation, they were there to check in and help take my mind away from the horrors of cancer. Yet still, I couldn't share my deepest fears with them or anyone else – I was terrified I was going to die.
My sleep began to worsen and I'd spend the nights walking in endless circles around my bedroom trying to calm my racing thoughts and force myself to be tired. I'd look out the window or sit in the garden trying to distract myself – I probably know more about the night-time habits of wildlife in my area than anyone else.
Knowing you're the only person awake at 3am is a horrible and isolating feeling. Throughout my entire cancer journey, I took just two days off work – after the surgery. On my radiation days, I'd work in the morning then have my treatment in the afternoon. My consultant said I should rest but I was determined to keep working because I desperately needed to socialise so I didn't feel entirely alone.
On a good day, I'd sleep for four hours. But there were many nights where I didn't get a single minute of sleep. It turned me into a different person. I was grumpy and irritable and had zero patience. I tried to warn my colleagues when I was feeling particularly awful because I didn't want to upset anyone. My thoughts were muddled and I didn't have the energy to do anything besides try to work all day and then return home and spend another night forcing my thoughts to settle and eyes to shut – to no avail.
Seeking professional help
After months of suffering, my insomnia was unbearable and it was almost impossible to complete a full day's work. I'd been trying to juggle too many balls and it felt like everything was finally falling apart. I can't tell you how much online advice I sought and the number of over-the-counter pills I tried but nothing helped. Eventually, I decided to seek professional help.
My doctor was young and newly qualified. She was very kind and understanding and prescribed me with Zopiclone – a hypnotic sleeping pill for short-term insomnia treatment. But she didn't really explain what it was, how it worked, or its addictive potential. That night, I took my first 3.75mg dose and the impact was immediate and incredible. I slept properly and peacefully for what felt like the first time in forever. After just one night, I began to feel more myself – a massive weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
Each night, I took the pill around half an hour before I went to sleep and it nearly always worked. For me, it was the perfect drug. I didn't suffer any side effects and when my alarm went off at 5:30 each morning, I felt alive instead of the grogginess and exhaustion I'd become accustomed to. By this point I'd long been given the all clear for my breast cancer and I had a new lease on life.
Zopiclone shouldn't be prescribed for any longer than four weeks and treatment should be as short as possible to avoid dependency, according to the NHS and Nice. Yet I took the drug every night for four years (albeit in a low dose). During that time, life was great and everything felt incredibly easy. Whenever I ran out of Zopiclone, I collected my new prescription from the pharmacy, no questions asked. I no longer spent my nights plagued by anxiety, walking in endless circles around my room, simply desperate to sleep. I had the energy to meet up with friends. I was finally 'normal' again.
Running out of medication
In 2020, I retired and, shortly after, everything came crashing down. One fateful day, I went to the pharmacy to collect my prescription. My usual medication was on the script however the Zopiclone wasn't listed. I spoke to the pharmacist who couldn't offer an explanation and so I called my doctor who (rather bluntly and unsympathetically) explained it had been pulled off the local prescribing list. 'We'll give you one more month of Zopiclone and that's it,' he told me.
Until that point, it had never even occurred to me that I was addicted to this drug. Because it was helping me and I felt my normal happy self once again, I hadn't given it a second thought. But faced with the looming deadline of my final Zopiclone dose, it finally dawned on me that I'd become completely dependent on this pill. I was an addict.
That final month was great but when the Zopiclone finally ran out, it felt like I fell off a cliff. My anxious thoughts and sleepless nights quickly returned and, within two days, I was an absolute zombie – struggling to make it through the day. I called and called the surgery, begging for more Zopiclone, but there was nothing they could do. I was frustrated and desperate – it felt like they happily prescribed me with this drug for four years and created the addiction within me, only to cut me off one day for no reason.
I turned to online forums and social media for answers and spoke to other people suffering from Zopiclone addiction but they all felt just as lost and helpless. During one of my worst and lowest moments, I considered knocking on the door of someone I knew who I knew sold weed to see if that might help to knock me out. Everything I did during that time was really embarrassing and not 'me' at all, but I was desperate to regain the feeling that zopiclone gave me.
The worst period of my life
After that, I began to lose all sense of time. It was the worst period of my life – even harder than my cancer battle. I wandered through the wilderness for nearly a year, feeling completely hopeless and alone. Some nights, I was so exhausted that I'd pass out for a little while but it was never restful and always short-lived.
As my struggles worsened, I turned to food. I remember attending a routine check-up that year and being told I was pre-diabetic. I didn't care about my health or what I looked like any more. I was filling up on sugary snacks to try to numb the pain and desperation.
Before this time, I often met up with two of my closest friends from work for a walk and chat. However, as I went through the withdrawals and my insomnia returned, I didn't want to admit my struggles to them and began to isolate myself. I've always been a social butterfly but I didn't have the energy or motivation to see anyone. I felt entirely alone.
Getting my life back on track
Again, I tried countless methods to help me sleep but nothing worked. However, everything changed in 2022 when I reached out to my doctor friend and she recommended a cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) program called Sleepio. It wasn't offered by the NHS in England at the time (although it was and still is in Scotland) however, in pure desperation, I called up the company and managed to secure free access to the program in exchange for detailed feedback. It's a six-week program delivered by a virtual sleep expert – the Prof – who teaches cognitive and behavioural skills to overcome sleep problems. I can't begin to explain how wonderful it was.
I think it worked so well for me because I really wanted it to. I fully committed to the program and, whilst it didn't cure my insomnia, it gave me the tools to tackle the anxious thoughts that fuelled my sleepless nights. After those initial six weeks, I continued with the it for another four months. Now, I get around six hours of sleep each night and – when I occasionally struggle to calm my racing thoughts – I log on and drift off to sleep listening to the Prof's calming voice.
One of the biggest lessons it's taught me is that if you can't sleep, you need to get up. Don't lie in bed for hours on end, letting your thoughts worsen and your anxieties escalate. Get up and do something – whether it's reading a chapter of a book or putting a clothes wash on. As long as you're not looking at a screen, it should help to calm your stress around not being able to sleep. During those early days, I'll admit I got up seven or eight times throughout the night, desperately trying to distract myself – but it worked.
Another important factor is where you sleep – you need to be in a comfortable and stress-free environment. I moved my bed into a different room and immediately I felt more calm and peaceful. Now, I struggle to step foot into that old room because it brings back the horrifying memories of my sleepless anxiety-ridden nights.
CBT (in-person or online) is recommended by Nice as the first-line treatment for chronic insomnia in the UK, yet GPs are over-prescribing hypnotic and addictive sleeping pills instead because – at present – they have no other choice. Yet in Scotland it is fully funded and available to all on the NHS. How can this disparity be right? In my opinion, they're turning more and more people into addicts by handing these drugs out to so many insomniacs.
My battle with insomnia was debilitating. Those sleepless nights were some of the hardest moments of my life and accepting that I was an addict is heartbreaking. I don't want anyone else to go through that. Whilst I'm not completely cured, I'm no longer anxiety-ridden or sleep-deprived. CBT gave me the tools and power to get my life back on track and the Government and NHS need to do everything they can to help other insomnia sufferers in the same way.
Z-drugs FAQs
Under NHS guidelines, patients with insomnia should be offered cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) as a first line of treatment. However, due to a lack of funding, the therapy is difficult for millions of patients in England to access. As a result, the NHS is overprescribing addictive sleeping pills known as z-drugs.
What are z-drugs?
Z-drugs, including Zopiclone and Zolpidem, are 'short-term sedatives prescribed for insomnia or sleep disruption', explains Dr David Garley, GP and director of The Better Sleep Clinic. 'Whilst they don't actually give you sleep, they have a sedative effect which starts quickly, within 20 to 40 minutes.' He says they're helpful for bouts of short-term insomnia, with an ideal prescription length of three to five days. They can ease the pressure of sleep for people struggling with stress, anxiety or bereavement.
Who is usually offered z-drugs?
Doctors prescribe z-drugs to a range of people suffering with severe insomnia, Dr Garley says. However 'they have to be used with more caution in older patients who can be more susceptible to side effects like falls and confusion'. This is also the case for people with respiratory problems or conditions like sleep apnoea, as it may worsen their breathing. Z-drugs must also be used cautiously for occupational drivers, due to them having a 'hangover effect' which can affect driving performance the next day.
Common side effects of z-drugs?
'Most people just fall asleep,' Dr Garley says, 'although they might feel a bit swimmy or sedated before that happens'. Most of the side effects are associated with the sedation, including feeling sleepy or tired the next day which has the potential to lead to falls or accidents.
However, whilst the benefits of taking z-drugs for a short period of time are well-established, the evidence base wanes for long-term intake. 'They've got a real addiction potential and most GPs prescribe them for longer than the recommended time due to a lack of other resources,' Dr Garley explains. Those who take z-drugs for a long time may need a higher dose as they grow a tolerance and possibly become addicted to the sedatives.
How many people in the UK are taking z-drugs?
Nearly five million prescriptions for z-drugs were issued to almost 770,000 patients in England in 2023-24, according to NHS data.
What are the common alternatives to z-drugs?
Benzodiazepines (such as Diazepam and Lorazepam) are commonly prescribed on the NHS to treat sleeping problems or anxiety. 'They also don't give you sleep, rather they're a sedative,' Dr Garley says. Daridorexant is another drug which has been recently approved by Nice and decreases wakefulness rather than acting as a sedative, which is 'much better'.
The best treatment is CBT for insomnia, known as CBT-I, which is 'talking therapy where you speak with a practitioner about the thoughts and actions influencing your sleep', Dr Garley explains. It has an 80 per cent success rate however isn't widely available, hence why GPs are prescribing pills instead.
As told to Ella Nunn
