Latest news with #sexdrive
Daily Mail
2 days ago
- Health
- Daily Mail
EXCLUSIVE Could your diet be ruining your sex life? Nutritionists reveal key foods to avoid - and the ones you should be sticking to instead
Loss of libido is a common problem thought to affect up to 1 in 5 men and 1 in 3 women across the UK. But thankfully, nutritionists have now shared the top foods to avoid to keep your sex life as active as possible - and the produce you should be sticking to instead. Vinny Kodamala, from LloydsPharmacy Online Doctor, and Kerry Beeson, a nutritional therapist from Prep Kitchen, revealed to FEMAIL the best and worst dishes for a low sex drive. Those to avoid included full-fat dairy, red and processed meats and baked goods, such as biscuits, cakes, and pastries. The products can increase high cholesterol, which can negatively impact your sex drive, according to Vinny. Meanwhile, Kerry suggested that the romantic oysters and champagne duo works perfectly as a starter during date night because they do actually have some scientific backing when it comes to being aphrodisiacs. She also suggested incorporating leafy greens and watermelon in your diet for their nitric oxide-boosting properties, which helps to widen blood vessels and aid blood flow around the body, including to the genitals. Read on to find out the food items that can help improve a person's sex drive, according to the nutritionists, and the ingredients to avoid... EAT WHOLE GRAINS & HEALTHY OILS Vinny explained: 'The food we eat plays an important role in maintaining our health. The same goes for sexual health, as eating the recommended amount of fruit, vegetables, and whole grain products can help reduce the risk of erectile dysfunction. 'Some dietary choices can also increase the risk of men getting erectile dysfunction. As erectile dysfunction is related to blood flow, your blood vessels need to be in good health. 'Therefore, eating healthier foods reduces your risk of common vascular problems caused by high cholesterol, high blood sugar, high triglyceride levels, and obesity.' 'Ensuring you're eating a balanced diet with the recommended amount of fruit, vegetables, and whole grains is a brilliant place to start,' continued Vinny. Examples of whole grain products include oats, brown and wild rice, barley and quinoa. Elsewhere, the best fruit and vegetables to eat are produce such as watermelon, pineapple, pomegranates and cucumber. Meanwhile, the expert added: 'Studies have found that a Mediterranean diet involving lots of fresh fruit and vegetables, and healthy oils like olive oil, can prevent or improve erectile dysfunction.' AVOID FOODS WITH LOTS OF SATURATED FAT Vinny warned: 'You'll want to avoid foods that contain a lot of saturated fat or raise triglyceride levels such as cakes, pastries and biscuits, as these increase levels of bad cholesterol.' Try to limit your intake of the following: fatty foods, full-fat dairy, sugars, processed and fried food, suggested the expert. Vinny continued: 'Saturated fats tend to come from animal products, though they can also be found in some plant-based foods. These are often referred to as "bad" fats, as consuming too much can lead to increased cholesterol levels.' Top sources of saturated fats are red and processed meats, including beef, lamb, pork, bacon, and ham, milk and cheeses, especially hard cheeses, full-fat milk, and butter as well as baked goods and snacks, such as biscuits, cakes, and pastries. The expert also warned against trans fat, a type of unsaturated fat, that are found in bread, margarine, doughnuts, cakes, and pastries and some fast food products. Vinny explained: 'They typically come from an industrial or artificial source, but they're also found in hydrogenated vegetable oil, a type of cooking oil that can be added to food to prolong its shelf life. 'Like saturated fats, trans fats can raise cholesterol levels in the blood, however, they are considered more damaging.' DITCH FAST FOOD 'Avoid eating large amounts of processed or fast food, as these are often high in fat and sugar, which can contribute to obesity,' warned Vinny. Continuing her advice, the nutritionist said: 'You'll want to avoid foods that can contribute to high blood sugar when eaten in large amounts - such as sugary and highly processed foods. 'While starchy foods like pasta and potatoes can be part of a balanced diet, it's important to enjoy them in moderation and opt for wholegrain or less processed versions where possible.' Meanwhile, Kerry insisted: 'High-fat foods like pizza and deep-fried foods are hard to digest, so you're likely to feel tired and sluggish afterward.' TRY OYSTERS AND CHAMPAGNE Kerry suggested that the romantic oyster and champagne duo works perfectly to help improve a person's sex drive. The nutritional therapist said: 'Oysters contain high levels of zinc, an important mineral for the production of testosterone, a vital hormone for sexual function in both men and women.' Discussing champagne, she continued: 'It's thought to boost nitric oxide production in the body. Nitric oxide helps to widen blood vessels and aid blood flow around the body, including to the genitals. 'However, while alcohol can relax us and may initially encourage libido, as Shakespeare famously said: "It provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance".' DON'T DRINK TOO MUCH ALCOHOL Vinny said: 'While some individuals may mistakenly believe alcohol is an aphrodisiac, excessive alcohol consumption can increase a man's risk of developing erectile dysfunction and can make it worse. 'If you drink regularly and you're experiencing erectile dysfunction, you should try and reduce your intake or give it up to see if this helps.' STICK TO NITRIC OXIDE-BOOSTING FOODS INSTEAD Instead of relying on alcohol to improve libido, Kerry suggested considering these nitric oxide-boosting foods instead, which can be incorporated into meals at home. 'Spinach, kale, and cabbage are rich in nitrates, which your body converts to nitric oxide,' explained the expert. She continued: 'Watermelon contains citrulline, an amino acid that your body converts to arginine and then into nitric oxide.' Kerry also suggested sunlight, saying: 'Did you know that sunlight can be a surprising ally in boosting your libido? 'Along with its role in vitamin D production, sunlight also stimulates the production of nitric oxide.' ENJOY SPICY FOOD 'Using strong flavours and spices can enhance the sensory experience of your meal. Chilis are also a known aphrodisiac - they contain capsaicin, which improves circulation and blood flow,' explained Kerry. She added: 'Beyond nutrients, the way you eat can be just as important in boosting your libido. 'Foods that you might eat with your fingers like asparagus, watermelon, or oysters, can heighten your sensory experience and add to the mood.'
The Sun
6 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Sun
Expert reveals how to reignite your sex drive after kids with 3 easy tips & how often married couples REALLY have sex
IF your sex drive has vanished since having kids, you're not alone. Relationship expert and Celebs Go Dating star Dr Tara has revealed her top tips for getting back in the mood. 3 3 She says a bit of effort in the bedroom can seriously transform your relationship and your confidence. Appearing on the Made by Mammas podcast, the sexologist and university professor gave a no-filter look into the realities of sex after kids and offered a simple 3-step fix. Here was Dr Tara's expert advice. Set the scene She explained that the first key to getting your mojo back is dealing with stress, which she says is the number one sex killer. 'You can't even think about desire if you're stressed,' she said. 'Stress is the brake. So you've got to remove the brake before you can accelerate.' Dr Tara recommends building a daily habit that calms your nervous system, whether that's deep breaths, a hot bath, meditation, or even a good brownie. After kids, it's easy to slip into routines where conversations revolve around who's doing the school run or what's for dinner. But if all you're sharing is screen time and chores, your spark can fizzle out fast. Georgie answers your sex questions Dr Tara said: 'Bring back affection.' That means carving out moments of real connection — and yes, even amid the chaos of family life. Try a seven-second kiss every day, not a peck, but a proper kiss. Or spend 20 minutes without phones just looking at each other and catching up, no distractions. You could even schedule what Dr Tara calls a 'sexy check-in' once a month, which is a chill dinner where you chat about what's working in the bedroom, what you'd like more of, and what's changed. She says it's not about pressure or performance. But just have an open, playful conversation that keeps intimacy on the radar. Because when you bring back laughter, affection and proper grown-up connection, desire follows naturally. Sexy Mindfulness The third tip was sexual mindfulness. She says sexual meditation has been proven to help women rebuild desire and enjoy sex more. The sexologist even has a guided meditation tutorial on Youtube. Dr Tara said: 'It's helped women recovering from cervical cancer feel sexy again. "If it works for them, it can work for anyone." And if you need a little help in the toy department, Dr Tara's got you covered there too, revealing her top pick for a quiet but powerful vibrator that's 'like the Dyson of sex toys.' 'It's so quiet you can use it in the car. It looks like lip gloss. I even wore it as a necklace – no one knew!' She recommends the Crave vibrator - a posh 24-carat gold vibrator that had her "shaking" till she was "numb". The vibrator retails for a pricey £125, but Tara claims it's worth every penny and even keeps one in her handbag. The doc also tackled questions from mums struggling with mismatched libidos, post- orgasm sensitivity and partners with no sex drive. Her advice was simple. Stop bottling it up and talk. Dr Tara said: 'You should be able to talk about sex with your partner. It's your chosen person. "If your drive is higher, take care of yourself first. Masturbate, feel empowered, then invite your partner in. "That confidence is magnetic.' And if you've ever wondered how often other couples are doing it, you're not alone. How long should you wait before having sex after birth? AFTER giving birth, it's generally recommended to wait six weeks before resuming sexual activity. This time frame allows your body to heal and recover, particularly after vaginal or cesarean deliveries. Here's why: Physical Healing: The body undergoes many changes during childbirth, including tears or incisions that need time to heal, as well as the uterus shrinking back to its normal size. The six-week period allows for proper healing of any stitches or incisions and reduces the risk of infections. Lochia (Postpartum Bleeding): After birth, you'll experience lochia, a discharge that can last up to six weeks. Resuming sex before this has stopped can increase the risk of infection. Hormonal Changes: Hormones fluctuate significantly post-birth, and you may experience vaginal dryness or discomfort due to lower estrogen levels. Waiting gives your body time to regain balance. Emotional Readiness: It's also important to be emotionally ready. The postpartum period can be overwhelming with physical recovery, caring for your newborn, and adjusting to new life dynamics. Take your time to reconnect with your partner emotionally and physically. Despite this, according to the NHS, "there are no rules about when to start having sex again after you have given birth." The NHS explained: "You'll probably feel sore as well as tired after your baby is born, so don't rush into it." Dr Tara says married couples of 10 years average sex once every two weeks. But she revealed that the happiest ones get down to it once a week. 'You don't need hours,' she said. 'Even 10 minutes can change the energy in your relationship and in yourself.' The sexologist claimed people who have a higher orgasm rate "make more money" and even help you to network as she claims orgasming can make a person "magnetic" to others. So if the spark's faded a bit post-babies, don't panic. A few mindful moves, a sexy chat, and a decent vibrator could be all it takes to bring the fire back.
The Sun
05-07-2025
- Health
- The Sun
Swollen breasts, rounded tummy… being pregnant makes me feel hornier than EVER – do I have a kink?
1 DEAR DEIDRE: MY rounded stomach and enlarged breasts make me feel hornier than ever and whenever I'm pregnant, I can't get enough of my boyfriend. We've had three children in quick succession and I'm itching to get pregnant again but he is doing his best to avoid me in the bedroom. At first he loved the fact I was insatiable. We went from having sex around twice a month to at least twice a day once those pregnancy hormones kicked in. I'd never experienced anything like it and really enjoyed feeling so incredible. When I'm pregnant, all he needs to do is look at me and I'll be tearing off his clothes. Whenever I'm expecting, I make sure we have sex before we get out of bed in the morning - even a quickie will tide me over. He used to say that my high sex drive makes him feel so good, invincible even. He lapped up my higher libido when I was pregnant with our first, the second time he was happy enough to go along with my requests, but by my third pregnancy I could see he was flagging. Whenever I hint that I like to start having 'baby sex' again, he looks horrified. Every time I try to make a move on him, he either has a bad back, feels knackered, or he hops out of bed making up excuses that he can hear one of the children. I'd love to have at least one more baby - to have those curves and sensitive nipples for a last time - but I'm getting the distinct impression he is avoiding it. Last night I started stroking his back and he snapped at me saying my pregnant fetish was off putting. After snarling that I needed to give it a rest he stropped off to the spare room. I feel so rejected. Have I got a fetish? I never thought of it like that. Dear Deidre on relationships, jealousy and envy DEIDRE SAYS: It isn't uncommon for women to have an increase in sexual desire when they are pregnant. As you rightly say, it's the increased levels of oestrogen and progesterone that are responsible for intensifying your sexual desire. Pregnancy also brings an increase in blood flow, in particular to the pelvic area, which can accentuate arousal. Add to that the physical changes that come with pregnancy, like engorged breasts and many women feel like they have a one track mind - full of sexual desires only. Your boyfriend is avoiding intimacy with you and you don't understand why. So it's definitely time to talk to him about how he's feeling. He may be worried about having a fourth child from an energy level or financial perspective. You have three young children already and it's very common for couples to feel distanced from each other as they prioritise their children's needs. So make sure you are making quality time for each other - time to properly talk and find out what is going on in each other's lives. Fetishes might sound like an extreme label, but many people have them and a pregnancy fetish is common. All it means is that you really enjoy sex while pregnant which is nothing to be ashamed of. My support pack Kinks And Fetishes explains more. Dear Deidre's Pregnancy Problems Deidre's mailbag is bursting with pregnancy predicaments. One woman is expecting a baby with her ex while still sleeping with her husband. Another man got his girlfriend pregnant after a threesome and now wonders if the baby is even his. And one reader fears she's just a rebound after falling pregnant by a new boyfriend who still has feelings for the mother of his other child. PREGNANCY AND DESIRE: A CLOSER LOOK A pregnancy fetish — also known as maiesiophilia — involves sexual attraction to someone who is pregnant, or to the idea of pregnancy itself. Like many kinks, it varies widely from person to person. For some, the appeal is physical: the shape of the body, fuller breasts, or the natural glow associated with pregnancy. For others, it's more psychological — linked to ideas of fertility, vulnerability, or dominance and possession. In heterosexual dynamics, it can be about impregnation — the act of 'breeding' someone — which ties into power and fantasy. In other cases, the pregnancy itself is not the goal, but a symbol: of transformation, femininity, or taboo. Pregnancy content is increasingly visible on adult platforms, and some performers cater specifically to this fetish — posting photos or videos while visibly pregnant, or roleplaying pregnancy scenarios using prosthetics. Like many fetishes, it becomes problematic only when it crosses the line into non-consensual behaviour. Fetishising a stranger's pregnancy without consent — especially in public — can feel invasive or objectifying. It's essential to approach these desires with empathy, boundaries and open communication. Ask me and my counsellors anything Every problem get a personal and private reply from one of my trained counsellors within one working day. Sally Land is the Dear Deidre Agony Aunt. She achieved a distinction in the Certificate in Humanistic Integrative Counselling, has specialised in relationships and parenting. She has over 20 years of writing and editing women's issues and general features. Passionate about helping people find a way through their challenges, Sally is also a trustee for the charity Family Lives. Her team helps up to 90 people every week. Sally took over as The Sun's Agony Aunt when Deidre Sanders retired from the The Dear Deidre column four years ago. The Dear Deidre Team Of Therapists Also Includes: Kate Taylor: a sex and dating writer who is also training to be a counsellor. Kate is an advisor for dating website OurTime and is the author of five self-help books. Jane Allton: a stalwart of the Dear Deidre for over 20 years. Jane is a trained therapist, who specialises in family issues. She has completed the Basic Counselling Skills Level 1, 2, and 3. She also achieved the Counselling and Psychotherapy (CPCAB) Level 2 Certificate in Counselling Studies. Catherine Thomas: with over two decades worth of experience Catherine has also trained as a therapist, with the same credentials as Jane. She specialises in consumer and relationship issues. Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you. You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page or email us at:
The Sun
27-06-2025
- General
- The Sun
My sexless marriage is pushing me into an affair with another woman – I didn't sign up to be celibate
DEAR DEIDRE: MY wife's total lack of interest in sex is pushing me into an affair with another woman. I have tried talking to her about it, but she just told me to buy myself a male sex toy if I felt that frustrated. I've tried everything to make her want me again. I didn't sign up to be celibate, so is it wrong for me to look elsewhere for sexual fulfilment? I'm 42 and my wife is 44. We've been married for 15 years and have three children. We always had a healthy, regular sex life. But since our last child was born three years ago, there has not been any intimacy at all. She says she has no desire for sex and thinks our only focus should be on the kids. When I try to be affectionate in bed, she pushes me away, turns over and goes to sleep. The problem is, I still have a very high sex drive. I think about sex all the time, so I feel constantly rejected and frustrated. I don't want a best friend and co-parent I live with. I want a wife and a lover. I'd be willing to compromise and have sex even just once a week — as I've told her — but she won't consider it. I've never cheated on her and I don't want to leave her for another woman. But her refusal to have sex is making me start to think about straying. Dear Deidre: Understanding why your man's gone off sex When I mentioned this was where my brain was going, hoping it might push her into dealing with our problem, she just changed the subject. Recently, I've been going online and talking to another woman. She's also in an unhappy relationship and has made it clear her sex drive almost certainly matches mine. I'm now on the brink of arranging a time and a place to meet her. I can't stop fantasising about it. Would it be so wrong? DEIDRE SAYS: Sexual intimacy is an important part of marriage. It's unsurprising that your wife's lack of desire is making you unhappy. She may be content to 'shut up shop', but she seems to be in denial about the effect this is having on you. That's unfair. This doesn't mean an affair is a good idea, or a solution. It will only cause many more problems. It's your wife you want. So before jumping into bed with someone else, ask her if she'd agree to counselling so you can talk openly and honestly and try to find ways to resolve this. Contact Tavistock Relationships ( to make an appointment. If she won't agree to discuss this, then you need to think about whether your marriage has a future. DEAR DEIDRE: YEARS of being in an unhappy marriage with an alcoholic had left me depressed, lonely and with no hope for the future, so I wrote to you. All I had in my life was work, but because I had to pay for everything, my salary was gone before I knew it. My husband had driven all our friends away. We'd been married for 25 years. I'm 50 and he's 53. I tried talking to him about it, but he didn't listen. He clearly had no interest in me, only in his bottles of wine. As I blamed myself for being in this mess, I felt I couldn't burden my family with my woes. You were so sympathetic and understanding, reassuring me that the situation was not my fault. You advised me to see my GP and to reach out to my family and old friends, saying they would want to hear from me and that I needed human connections in order to change things. You also sent me your support pack, Dealing With A Problem Drinker. Finally, you gently suggested I might need to think about exiting my marriage. I've started saving up so I can eventually leave, and I've joined some local groups to make friends. Thank you, Deidre, for making me see I deserve better and have a future. DEAR DEIDRE: I HAVE a huge crush on a boy in the year above me at school. I know I love him, but there are so many prettier girls in his class, I don't think he'll ever feel the same. I'm 13 and he's nearly 15. Sometimes, I tell myself he's flirting with me but, really, I think he's just being friendly. I can't talk to anyone about this. My friends would tease me. I think about him so much, I can't concentrate at school. What should I do? DEIDRE SAYS: Crushes are very normal, so you have no need to feel embarrassed. It's best to get to know him as a friend and take things slowly. If you have common interests, perhaps you could casually suggest going to the cinema or grabbing a soft drink together. My support pack, Learning To Love, will tell you more about developing a relationship. TOXIC MOTHER HARMING MY KIDS LIKE SHE DID WITH ME DEAR DEIDRE: IS it time for me to cut my toxic mother out of my life for good? She has always bullied me and her behaviour is now affecting my kids, too. Last time we visited, she kicked us out of her house! I'm 38 and have three young children. My own childhood was miserable because she was so cruel. She made me feel useless, stupid and ugly. My older sister, on the other hand, could do no wrong. I left home at 16 because I couldn't stand it any more, and I've been independent ever since. But I've tried to maintain a relationship with her. I guess I'm always hoping she'll see I'm a good person who has made a success of my life and start being kinder. I'm jealous of my friends who have good, loving relationships with their mums. Last weekend, I took my children to visit her for her birthday. We made an effort to look nice and brought gifts. Within a few hours, she was being nasty, making racist remarks – one of my kids is mixed race – and had my youngest in tears. When I finally stood up to her, she threw us out of her house, saying we were trash. I've realised she is evil and will never change. I don't want her to destroy my children's self-esteem the way she destroyed mine. Would it be wrong for me to break off contact for good? DEIDRE SAYS: You've tried again and again to win your mother's love and respect. In return, she's treated you – and now your kids – appallingly. None of this is your fault. You're a strong, capable woman, in spite of her. Perhaps it's time to accept she won't change and that you'll never have the relationship you crave. Talking to a counsellor about this may help you to make a decision. My support pack, How Counselling Can Help, explains further. Get more advice from Family Action ( 0808 802 6666). SCAMMED BY LONG-DISTANCE GIRLFRIEND DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my long-distance internet girlfriend asks me for anything, I don't seem to be able to say no to her. I'm starting to think she might be scamming me. I'm in my mid-40s, while she is 28 and lives in Poland. We've been talking online for six months and I've completely fallen for her. She makes me feel so special because she really listens to me and tells me I'm clever and handsome. I've been single for a long time, so I'm not used to that. When she said she wanted to start a business but didn't have the funds, I offered to send her cash. I've given her a lot more since then. Even though she never asks directly, I find myself agreeing to help. She has told me she can't wait to see me so we can sleep together at last. She even describes what she will do to me when she arrives. Now, she's asked if I'll book her a plane ticket to the UK so she can come over to stay. I'm excited, but also worried I am being used and that she isn't genuine. What should I do? DEIDRE SAYS: Follow your gut. If something is telling you this woman is manipulating you, then that's likely to be the case. She's much younger, has no money, lives in another country and probably sees you as a ticket to a better life. That doesn't mean she doesn't genuinely like you, but her motivation may be clouded by finances. Stop sending her money and offer to visit her instead. Her reaction is likely to reveal the truth. My support pack, Love Online, has more information.
Daily Mail
10-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Ulrika Jonsson reveals how she re-discovered her 'irrepressible sex drive' in her 50s following a 'barren marriage' after Gwyneth Paltrow admitted to grieving her lack of libido
has detailed how she re-discovered her 'irrepressible sex drive' in her 50s after Gwyneth Paltrow admitted to grieving her lack of libido. The presenter, 57, who candidly discussed her 'barren marriage' in which she had sex just twice in eight years, shared her thoughts on the actress' recent comments. Speaking on the most recent episode of her Goop podcast, Gwyneth, 52, admitted when her 'sexuality wanes she feels a grief.' Meanwhile, as she enjoys her 'newfound sexual revolution' in her fifties, Ulrika, confessed to experiencing the opposite. Writing in her column for The Sun, she explained: 'Little surprise then that I emerged from that long, barren relationship with my spark plugs replaced and firing on all cylinders — I was a thirsty girl. My sex drive was irrepressible. 'My other defence is that, as well as living for nearly eight years with only two sexual encounters, I also never did any of it when I was in my twenties either.' Ulrika added: 'At 52, Gwynneth is six years my junior and lagging a tad behind, but I certainly know where she's coming from. Or not coming from.' It comes in response to Gwynneth's previous comments as she confessed to struggling with her sexuality. She said: 'My sexuality has changed, and it makes me feel like I don't know myself anymore. When my sexuality wanes or libido or whatever hormonally, I feel, like, a grief. 'My sexuality was such a huge and important part of who I was. I do notice there's a bit of, like, anhedonia lately. 'There's something about this time hormonally where it's like the pleasure all around is just dulled.' Since launching her lifestyle brand Goop 2008, Gwyneth has become an increasingly extroverted over-sharer. She has shared lists of her favourite vibrators and provided tips on how her readers can improve their libido and have more fun in the bedroom - whether it's with a partner or by themselves. Gwynneth also caused quite the stir when she candidly opened up about her past relationships with Brad Pitt and Ben Affleck. In 2023, she revealed which of the on-screen stars was 'better in bed' and who of the two was the 'best kisser'. The admissions, made during an appearance on the sex-focused podcast Call Her Daddy, was the latest in a very long line of brazen 'bare it all' confessions from Gwynnie, who has in recent years readily offered up all manner of anecdotes about the most intimate aspects of her life. Meanwhile, Ulrika has been single since her 2019 divorce from third husband Brian Monet after the pair parted ways after ten years together. They have one son, Malcolm, 16. Her first marriage to cameraman John Turnbull was in 1990 and they have a son, Cameron, 30. The presenter's second marriage in 2003 was to Lance Gerrard-Wright who, at the time, was a contestant on her TV show Mr Right. They share a daughter, Martha, 20. The mother-of-four also has a daughter, Bo, 24, with ex-boyfriend hotelier, Marcus Kempen, who she separated from in 2000 after two years.
