Latest news with #silence
Yahoo
3 hours ago
- General
- Yahoo
13 Times Silence Says More Than Any Comeback Ever Could
Silence often speaks volumes. When words seem inadequate, there are moments when keeping quiet can convey more than any string of sentences ever could. Whether it's a tense argument or an awkward encounter, silence can be a powerful tool. Let's dive into the subtleties of silence and explore those moments when saying nothing at all is the best answer. 1. When Comforting Someone Sometimes, when someone you care about is going through a tough time, there are no words that can truly help. In moments of grief or heartbreak, your presence can mean more than any advice or platitude. Instead of trying to fix things with words, simply being there can be remarkably comforting. According to psychologist Dr. Guy Winch, offering a listening ear without jumping in with solutions allows people to feel heard and supported. Silence, in this case, acts as a vessel for empathy, allowing the person to process their emotions at their own pace. Your quiet presence signals that you are there to support them, no matter what they choose to share or not share. It gives them the space to express whatever they need, or simply to sit in silence with someone who cares. In a world that often prioritizes quick fixes, offering the gift of quiet companionship can be a rare and valuable gesture. This form of support can be more meaningful than any well-intentioned but ultimately hollow words. So next time someone you love is struggling, consider the power of simply being there in silence. 2. During An Argument Arguments can quickly escalate into a battle of words, with each person trying to outdo the other. When tempers flare, staying silent can sometimes be the strongest stance. By choosing not to engage, you give yourself and the other person time to cool down. Silence can act as a pause button, allowing for reflection and reducing the likelihood of saying something regrettable. It offers a chance for both parties to regroup and approach the situation with a clearer mindset. By not responding immediately, you prevent the argument from spiraling out of control. You demonstrate that you're prioritizing understanding over winning the argument. This can lead to a more thoughtful and constructive conversation later on. Silence in an argument is not about avoidance; it's about choosing the right moment to speak. Letting things simmer down can lead to a resolution that's respectful and mindful. 3. When Receiving Criticism Receiving criticism can be challenging, especially when it's unexpected or feels unfair. In these moments, the instinct may be to defend yourself, but staying silent can be more beneficial. Giving yourself time to process the feedback can lead to better self-reflection and growth. Psychologist Dr. Kristin Neff suggests that embracing silence allows individuals to practice self-compassion, which can lead to more productive outcomes. You can consider the validity of the criticism and decide how to respond thoughtfully. Taking a moment before reacting allows you to address the criticism with a level head. This pause can help prevent defensiveness from clouding your judgment. Silence gives you the opportunity to determine whether the feedback is constructive or simply a matter of opinion. By not responding immediately, you maintain control over your emotions and actions. Ultimately, this approach can lead to more meaningful personal development and improved relationships. 4. When Listening To Someone's Story Listening is an underrated skill, and silence is its key component. When someone shares their story, whether it's about their day or a life-changing event, your silence can speak louder than words. It signals that you're truly attentive and valuing what they're saying. Sometimes, people just need a space to be heard without any interruptions or advice. Silence can create that space, showing that you're fully present and engaged. This type of listening requires you to put aside your own thoughts and responses. By refraining from jumping in with your own anecdotes or opinions, you allow the other person to express themselves freely. Silence shows respect for their experience and perspective. It encourages the person to open up, knowing they're not being judged or interrupted. Sometimes, the most supportive action is to simply listen without the need to fill the silence. 5. In A Moment Of Awe A stunning sunset or a breathtaking view can often render words inadequate. In these moments, silence allows you to fully absorb and appreciate the beauty in front of you. This kind of silence connects you to the experience, letting you fully engage with your surroundings. According to research published by the Journal of Environmental Psychology, moments of awe can lead to increased feelings of well-being and connectedness to the world. By staying silent, you allow yourself to be fully immersed in the wonder of the moment. Silence in awe-inspiring situations can also deepen your connection with those around you. Sharing a silent moment can create a bond, a mutual understanding that words might only disrupt. It's a shared recognition of something greater, something beyond words. In these moments, silence becomes a language of its own, communicating appreciation and wonder. Next time you encounter something truly awe-inspiring, let silence be your response. 6. When Words Could Cause Harm There are times when saying what you're thinking could hurt someone or damage a relationship. In these instances, choosing silence can prevent unnecessary pain. It gives you the space to consider the consequences of your words and whether they're necessary or helpful. By holding back, you allow yourself the chance to reconsider your approach and find a more constructive way to communicate. Silence can act as a filter, protecting both you and the person involved from rash decisions or hurtful comments. This doesn't mean you should always avoid difficult conversations or truths. Rather, it's about timing and the manner in which you choose to express those truths. Silence can provide the pause needed to address issues with empathy and care. It ensures that what you eventually say is thoughtful and considerate. Sometimes, taking the time to be silent first can lead to a more meaningful and positive dialogue. 7. In A Moment Of Reflection Silence is an essential companion for introspection and self-discovery. When life gets overwhelming, a moment of quiet can help you navigate your thoughts and emotions. By removing the constant noise of daily life, you create space for clarity and insight. Mindfulness expert Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn emphasizes the value of silence in developing self-awareness and reducing stress. Taking time to be silent allows you to reconnect with yourself and evaluate what's truly important. In these moments, silence can guide you toward solutions and understanding that might remain hidden in the chaos of noise. It encourages deeper thinking and a more profound connection with your own values and desires. Silence in reflection can be a source of strength and resilience. It allows you to assess situations more objectively and make decisions aligned with your true self. So, when you're feeling lost or uncertain, seek silence to guide your way. 8. When You Don't Have Enough Information Sometimes, the best answer is no answer—at least not yet. When you're asked a question and don't have all the facts, silence can be a wise choice. Jumping to conclusions or giving half-formed answers can create confusion or even spread misinformation. Holding back until you're sure helps maintain credibility and shows that you take accuracy seriously. In both professional and personal settings, it's often better to say nothing than to say something uncertain. This approach also shows maturity and patience. It communicates that you're thoughtful and intentional with your words. Silence buys you time to gather more information, ask better questions, and return with a response that's informed and reliable. In a world driven by quick takes and knee-jerk reactions, pausing to think is an underrated strength. 9. During Meditative Or Spiritual Practices Silence plays a crucial role in many spiritual and meditative practices. It creates the space for inner reflection, connection, and mindfulness. In these moments, silence isn't just the absence of noise—it's an intentional practice of tuning into something deeper. According to meditation experts, silence can help reduce stress, lower blood pressure, and improve mental clarity. It offers a path to inner peace that words often fail to reach. Practicing silence through meditation can also enhance your emotional resilience and patience. It teaches you to sit with discomfort and find calm amidst chaos. Silence becomes a sanctuary where you can listen to your inner voice without distractions. Whether through formal meditation or simply sitting quietly, these moments foster a sense of grounding and awareness. 10. When Observing Others' Behavior Silence can be a powerful tool when you're observing how people behave, especially in unfamiliar situations. It allows you to gather insights without influencing the outcome with your words. By staying quiet, you can notice body language, tone, and subtle cues that might otherwise go unnoticed. This silent observation can reveal truths about a person's character, intentions, or feelings. It sharpens your perception and enhances your understanding of social dynamics. Remaining silent doesn't mean being disengaged—it often means you're paying closer attention. It positions you as a thoughtful observer rather than a reactive participant. Over time, this habit can help you navigate relationships and situations with greater wisdom. Listening and watching in silence often reveals more than speaking ever could. 11. When Giving Someone Space Sometimes people need space, not conversation. When someone withdraws or seems overwhelmed, silence can respect their boundaries without making things worse. Giving someone quiet time shows empathy and awareness of their emotional needs. It communicates, 'I'm here when you're ready,' without adding pressure. Psychologists note that honoring someone's need for space often strengthens relationships, rather than weakening them. Silence gives others permission to process at their own pace. It can lead to deeper conversations later when the person feels ready. Rushing to fill the silence with questions or reassurances might backfire. Instead, offering quiet patience shows trust in their ability to handle their feelings. Sometimes, silence is the greatest act of kindness you can offer. 12. When Practicing Gratitude Gratitude doesn't always need to be spoken aloud. Taking a moment of silence to reflect on what you're thankful for can deepen your appreciation. This quiet acknowledgment allows you to connect more fully with your emotions and the people or experiences that matter most. Studies in positive psychology highlight how reflective silence can boost well-being and happiness. By silently giving thanks, you cultivate a mindful awareness of life's blessings. These moments can be private rituals or shared with others during gatherings or special occasions. They remind you to pause, reflect, and honor what you have. Silence in gratitude reinforces the depth of your feelings in a way that words sometimes can't capture. Letting silence hold space for gratitude creates a profound sense of peace and fulfillment. 13. When Letting Someone Have The Last Word Not every conversation needs your final thought. Sometimes, letting someone else have the last word is the most generous and mature thing you can do. It shows you value their perspective enough not to counter or correct it. Silence in this context communicates confidence, security, and respect. It shifts the focus from winning the conversation to honoring the relationship. Choosing silence can de-escalate tension and foster understanding. It allows both people to leave the exchange with dignity intact. This restraint can strengthen connections and demonstrate emotional intelligence. Knowing when to stay quiet is a sign of strength, not weakness. Letting silence be your closing statement often speaks louder than any words could. Solve the daily Crossword


Arab News
a day ago
- Politics
- Arab News
Lost cause? Let the people of Lebanon have their say
There is a strange situation in Lebanon. For decades, politicians and their staff have been permanently present on the media scene — commenting, contesting, making their clan's voice heard, and, in short, occupying space. This was true whether in opposition or government. Today, there is a period of quasi-silence. This silence indicates a loss of direction and an inability to read what is coming next regionally. There is another serious and pressing element that is changing the equation: the erosion of security and the impact of the difficult situation in the Syrian Arab Republic. While the new leadership in Syria faces a lot of challenges and risks, the one that presents the biggest danger for Lebanon is not the military clashes between communities, but the lack of order and security, a threat that can easily spread. Syria's security forces are unprepared to fight crime due to corruption, fragmented control, and, as stated, much bigger issues than public safety. This situation creates great instability for Lebanon, as organized crime does not stay within borders. As the new president, Joseph Aoun, came to power, most Lebanese — some politicians included — hoped he would deliver on his promises to restore sovereignty to the country. Many imagined that a negotiated outcome with Hezbollah was possible and that soon Lebanon would be back to its short-lived 'Switzerland of the Middle East' model. Close to seven months later, the optimists — not to call them naive — agree with the cynics of the first hour that this is just quixotic. There was never going to be, and never will be, a negotiated outcome with Hezbollah. We nevertheless need to put things back into perspective. Aoun came to power after Israel defeated Hezbollah using strikes that brought the Iranian proxy to a level of vulnerability never witnessed before. This extreme weakness, and the shell-shocked status of Hezbollah with the change of regime in Syria, made people believe that this was the perfect time. Is it a lost opportunity, just like what happened in the 2000s, not taking the bold step needed and losing the window to make a real change? No one knows. Perhaps, despite years of US support and financing, the Lebanese armed forces still do not represent the stick that can challenge Hezbollah. Or perhaps the answer is simply closer than people think. There is no doubt that even if negotiated, projecting strength would be a necessity. This does not exist today. Organized crime does not stay within borders Khaled Abou Zahr There is also within Lebanon an echo of what we see in Western capitals. We cannot ignore the protest posters in New York showing an image of Iran's Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei with a slogan telling people to be on the right side of history. Yet, there are, even in Lebanon, people who are puzzled about what comes next. This is why it is time to leave the decision to the people in Lebanon. The electoral system for years has been carved out by politicians to accommodate their deals. They have been, in a sense, accomplices of Hezbollah. It is time to ask the people what they want. It is time to put forward two questions to the people of Lebanon. The first is: Do you back the sovereignty of the country? And the second question: Do you prefer a centralized political system or a federation? There also should be a two-level count — one for the entire nation and one for each community. It is now important to see what each community needs and wants for the future. There is no doubt that, for example, today the Sunni community — to which I belong — expects the change of regime in Syria from a pro-Iran to a Sunni one that is representative of the majority of the Syrian population to work to their advantage in the long term. In my opinion, Lebanon's specificity will clash with the uniformity of the Syrian model. This was true yesterday and will still be true tomorrow. The main objective should be to initiate a dialogue Khaled Abou Zahr Yet, it is this entrenched thinking that needs to be destroyed. This historical clan setup has partially been responsible for the ills of the country. Whether Hezbollah or the groups before it, it is the same cycle. I would like to see this setup and political system obliterated. I believe that federalism will bring stability to Lebanon. Yet, perhaps I am a tiny minority within the country or my community. This is why reverting to the people is important. It is also important to have a view of what each community needs and wants. This should be stated by the people and not the clan leaders who have perpetuated the cycles generation after generation. If we believe in the sovereignty and independence of Lebanon, we cannot be influenced by how the geopolitical shifts affect our community in the balance of power. It is contradictory. We need a system that gives each citizen within each community the capacity to lead a stable life. What would be the outcome of such referendums? How to manage fragmented results where a community or a group of communities vote differently? What happens if people vote against the state? Does this mean that all communities can arm themselves again? What if they vote for sovereignty — who will execute the will of the people? There are many unanswered questions. Yet the main objective should be to initiate a dialogue, or perhaps accept that, for now, Lebanon is still a lost cause. Either way, the people will know. And those who wish to be Don Quixote can still carry on.
Yahoo
2 days ago
- Sport
- Yahoo
Football club holds minute's silence in memory of boy who died in M60 tragedy
A minute's silence was held before Hyde United's latest match in memory of youth player Israel Iyabor - who died on the M60 over the weekend. The 15-year-old footballer died after emergency services were called to the motorway, near Blackley, on Sunday night (July 20). Greater Manchester Police (GMP) said that officers received reports of a 'concern for welfare.' READ MORE: Fireworks set off in 'memorial' for dead teenager as police called to 'disorder' READ MORE: He said he was 'doing a favour' for a friend, it landed him in court The ring road was shut at around 4.30pm as emergency services responded to what was described by transport agencies as a 'serious road traffic collision.' Never miss a story with the MEN's daily Catch Up newsletter - get it in your inbox by signing up here A teenager, later confirmed to be Israel, died at the scene. The Tameside non-league side Hyde United said he was a 'cherished' member of their junior setup. And the players gathered around the centre circle and held a silence in his memory before Hyde's home match against neighbours Curzon Ashton on Tuesday night. The club said on social media: "Thank you to everyone in attendance tonight for observing the minute's silence in memory of our Junior player Israel Iyabor who sadly passed away over the weekend. Join the Manchester Evening News WhatsApp group HERE "Our thoughts are with his friends and family." They said in a tribute to him issued following his death: "The club is devastated to hear the tragic news that Israel Iyabor, a cherished member of our junior football family, has sadly passed away. "Israel was more than just a talented young footballer — he was an influential, bubbly character whose energy, smile, and love for the game lit up every training session and matchday. "His coaches describe him as an absolute joy to coach and a privilege to watch on the pitch. "Hyde United sends its deepest condolences to Israel's family, friends, teammates, and everyone who had the pleasure of knowing him. He will be deeply missed by all at the club. "Rest in peace, Israel." Scores of floral and other tributes have been left near the scene of the tragedy, at junction 20 for Blackley. Whilst messages of condolence have continued to pour in on social media. One Facebook user said: "Awful news to be given. Such a character. "Spent many times chatting and laughing with him and his mum. My thoughts are with his family and friends and teammates. Rip." Another said: "Absolutely heartbreaking He will be missed by all that knew him. "Our thoughts are with his family and friends. Sending love, strength and hugs to all who need it. "He was talented and an joy to watch on the pitch. Xx" Whilst a third said: "Devastating news, such a talented and funny young lad who will be missed by so man."


The Guardian
5 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Guardian
‘Queer people were living, loving, suffering, surviving – but invisible': west Africa's groundbreaking gay novel 20 years on
When Jude Dibia first tried to sell the manuscript of his groundbreaking novel Walking With Shadows 20 years ago, he was aware of the silence around queerness in West African literature. While there had been books with gay themes, his is widely recognised as the first novel in the region to put a gay character at the heart of the story. 'The absence wasn't just literary; it was societal,' Dibia says. 'Queer people were living, loving, suffering, surviving – but largely rendered invisible or spoken of in hushed tones, if at all. That silence felt violent. It felt like erasure. 'Literature has the power to name what society refuses to see. Walking With Shadows was my small attempt to do that,' he adds. Initially, some publishers refused to touch the novel, considering it too controversial. Others suggested he rewrite the ending, either making the character renounce his homosexuality or killing him. When the book was finally published, Dibia was called names. He lost friends and was blacklisted from certain literary spaces. He was invited to events, only to later be uninvited once the organisers realised who he was and what he had written. Dibia's novel is widely recognised as the first Nigerian book to depict queerness with depth and empathy. It tells the story of Ebele 'Adrian' Njoku who has buried his sexuality in the past, become a husband and a father, but who has to confront who he really is when a co-worker informs his wife that he is gay. Ainehi Edoro, associate professor of English at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and founder of the literary blog Brittle Paper, says the novel marked a turning point. 'For a long time, queer characters in African literature were either invisible or treated as symbols of crisis, like their presence was a sign that something had gone wrong,' she says. 'So when Dibia wrote a novel that centred a gay Nigerian man as a full human being, that mattered. He pushed back against an entire archive of erasure.' The book, which turned 20 this year, was published by Blacksands in 2005 and republished in 2011 by Jalaa Writers' Collective. In 2019, it was adapted for the screen by Oya Media and a special film edition was released. But the initial backlash Walking with Shadows faced has not entirely disappeared, says Dibia. 'Some still view the book as too controversial, too political, too queer. But I've made peace with that. If a story makes people uncomfortable because it tells the truth, then perhaps discomfort is the first step toward awareness.' Dibia was forced to leave Nigeria and now lives in Sweden after the Same Sex Marriage Prohibition Act, a law that criminalises homosexuality, was passed in January 2014, fearing he might become a target for his writing. Since the publication of Walking With Shadows, an increasing number of books with queer characters at the heart of them have been published in West Africa and, specifically, Nigeria. There have been a slew of firsts: Chinelo Okparanta's Under the Udala Trees (2015) was the first novel to focus on lesbianism; Romeo Oriogun's Burnt Men (2016) was the first queer poetry book; Chike Frankie Edozien's Lives of Great Men: Living and Loving as an African Gay Man (2017), the first gay memoir; Unoma Azuah's Embracing My Shadows: Growing Up Lesbian in Nigeria (2020), the first lesbian memoir. Sign up to Global Dispatch Get a different world view with a roundup of the best news, features and pictures, curated by our global development team after newsletter promotion Dibia, who has published two more novels – Unbridled in 2007 and Blackbird in 2011 – considers the fact that his debut gave visibility to lives that had been systematically ignored as the book's most meaningful contribution. 'That's the legacy I'm proudest of: not the controversy, but the quiet courage it gave others to tell their own stories, in their own ways,' he says. Chike Frankie Edozien, author of Lives of Great Men, agrees. 'Each time I do something that examines the fullness and varying natures of our lives, I know that I'm continuing the work Jude began by adding to a canon that boldly debunks the prevailing narrative that queerness in West Africa is foreign or imported,' he says. 'We've been diverse as long as we've existed and I'm thankful for Jude's brave work that cracked open the door for the rest of us to kick down. All these years later, it [Walking with Shadows] still is for me a guiding light.' For the British-Nigerian gay rights activist Bisi Alimi, the book was liberating the moment he laid hands on it. 'Prior to that day, I had never really read any book as personal and relatable as that. Jude and the book did something to me,' he says. The writer and researcher Ayodele Olofintuade had a similar experience. 'The book came as it is, creating a new genre, queer literature,' she says. 'Encountering the novel about two years post-publication was a shift in reality for me. Walking with Shadows is a roadmap of what is possible.' Dibia's deepest satisfaction comes from readers all over the world who say that Adrian's story helps them feel seen. He sometimes wishes, however, that he had been better prepared for, and protected against, the fallout. 'But then again, maybe part of the novel's power comes from the fact that it was written without armour,' he says. 'I don't regret writing it. I only regret the climate that made it feel dangerous to tell the truth.' Today, Dibia still hopes people see the book as an act of courage and, more importantly, an act of care. Likewise, 20 years from now, he hopes the novel will still feel relevant yet like a historical document of a time outgrown. '[I hope it] becomes a reminder of what silence cost us, and how far we've come,' he says.


The Guardian
5 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Guardian
‘Queer people were living, loving, suffering, surviving – but invisible': west Africa's groundbreaking gay novel 20 years on
When Jude Dibia first tried to sell the manuscript of his groundbreaking novel Walking With Shadows 20 years ago, he was aware of the silence around queerness in West African literature. While there had been books with gay themes, his is widely recognised as the first novel in the region to put a gay character at the heart of the story. 'The absence wasn't just literary; it was societal,' Dibia says. 'Queer people were living, loving, suffering, surviving – but largely rendered invisible or spoken of in hushed tones, if at all. That silence felt violent. It felt like erasure. 'Literature has the power to name what society refuses to see. Walking With Shadows was my small attempt to do that,' he adds. Initially, some publishers refused to touch the novel, considering it too controversial. Others suggested he rewrite the ending, either making the character renounce his homosexuality or killing him. When the book was finally published, Dibia was called names. He lost friends and was blacklisted from certain literary spaces. He was invited to events, only to later be uninvited once the organisers realised who he was and what he had written. Dibia's novel is widely recognised as the first Nigerian book to depict queerness with depth and empathy. It tells the story of Ebele 'Adrian' Njoku who has buried his sexuality in the past, become a husband and a father, but who has to confront who he really is when a co-worker informs his wife that he is gay. Ainehi Edoro, associate professor of English at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and founder of the literary blog Brittle Paper, says the novel marked a turning point. 'For a long time, queer characters in African literature were either invisible or treated as symbols of crisis, like their presence was a sign that something had gone wrong,' she says. 'So when Dibia wrote a novel that centred a gay Nigerian man as a full human being, that mattered. He pushed back against an entire archive of erasure.' The book, which turned 20 this year, was published by Blacksands in 2005 and republished in 2011 by Jalaa Writers' Collective. In 2019, it was adapted for the screen by Oya Media and a special film edition was released. But the initial backlash Walking with Shadows faced has not entirely disappeared, says Dibia. 'Some still view the book as too controversial, too political, too queer. But I've made peace with that. If a story makes people uncomfortable because it tells the truth, then perhaps discomfort is the first step toward awareness.' Dibia was forced to leave Nigeria and now lives in Sweden after the Same Sex Marriage Prohibition Act, a law that criminalises homosexuality, was passed in January 2014, fearing he might become a target for his writing. Since the publication of Walking With Shadows, an increasing number of books with queer characters at the heart of them have been published in West Africa and, specifically, Nigeria. There have been a slew of firsts: Chinelo Okparanta's Under the Udala Trees (2015) was the first novel to focus on lesbianism; Romeo Oriogun's Burnt Men (2016) was the first queer poetry book; Chike Frankie Edozien's Lives of Great Men: Living and Loving as an African Gay Man (2017), the first gay memoir; Unoma Azuah's Embracing My Shadows: Growing Up Lesbian in Nigeria (2020), the first lesbian memoir. Sign up to Global Dispatch Get a different world view with a roundup of the best news, features and pictures, curated by our global development team after newsletter promotion Dibia, who has published two more novels – Unbridled in 2007 and Blackbird in 2011 – considers the fact that his debut gave visibility to lives that had been systematically ignored as the book's most meaningful contribution. 'That's the legacy I'm proudest of: not the controversy, but the quiet courage it gave others to tell their own stories, in their own ways,' he says. Chike Frankie Edozien, author of Lives of Great Men, agrees. 'Each time I do something that examines the fullness and varying natures of our lives, I know that I'm continuing the work Jude began by adding to a canon that boldly debunks the prevailing narrative that queerness in West Africa is foreign or imported,' he says. 'We've been diverse as long as we've existed and I'm thankful for Jude's brave work that cracked open the door for the rest of us to kick down. All these years later, it [Walking with Shadows] still is for me a guiding light.' For the British-Nigerian gay rights activist Bisi Alimi, the book was liberating the moment he laid hands on it. 'Prior to that day, I had never really read any book as personal and relatable as that. Jude and the book did something to me,' he says. The writer and researcher Ayodele Olofintuade had a similar experience. 'The book came as it is, creating a new genre, queer literature,' she says. 'Encountering the novel about two years post-publication was a shift in reality for me. Walking with Shadows is a roadmap of what is possible.' Dibia's deepest satisfaction comes from readers all over the world who say that Adrian's story helps them feel seen. He sometimes wishes, however, that he had been better prepared for, and protected against, the fallout. 'But then again, maybe part of the novel's power comes from the fact that it was written without armour,' he says. 'I don't regret writing it. I only regret the climate that made it feel dangerous to tell the truth.' Today, Dibia still hopes people see the book as an act of courage and, more importantly, an act of care. Likewise, 20 years from now, he hopes the novel will still feel relevant yet like a historical document of a time outgrown. '[I hope it] becomes a reminder of what silence cost us, and how far we've come,' he says.