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7 Things I Decluttered After Divorce for a Fresh Start
7 Things I Decluttered After Divorce for a Fresh Start

Yahoo

time4 days ago

  • General
  • Yahoo

7 Things I Decluttered After Divorce for a Fresh Start

This article may contain affiliate links that Yahoo and/or the publisher may receive a commission from if you buy a product or service through those links. Going through a divorce is undoubtedly transformative. It's not just about changing your legal connection with someone; it can mean shifting who you spend time with, where you live, and even what you own. For someone like me, who is deeply connected to my environment, it wasn't a surprise that the process of separation also led to some serious decluttering. Here's everything I got rid of in the months after my divorce, including old photos, mementos, and more. (Most) Wedding Mementos After my ex and I got married, I held onto everything related to our wedding — from the cake serving set gifted by my stepmom, to cards filled with generic well-wishes, and all those other little keepsakes that seemed to carry meaning. I wanted all of the memories readily available for us and our future kids. But now, I have pared it down to just a few items: my veil, thrifted vases we used in the floral arrangements, copies of speeches from family members, and our vows. That last one might seem like an odd choice, but it's important to me that if our daughter ever wonders, she can see how much love there was between us. Excess Kitchen Supplies As an avid home chef, my ex took care of most of our meals, which led to an impressive — though overwhelming — collection of kitchen gadgets. After our split, I was more than ready to simplify. Cooking has never been my forte, and while the gadgets were technically useful, they made me feel anxious rather than inspired. I couldn't handle the extra clutter when I was already juggling so much. Our Bed My ex and I moved in together immediately after college, meaning we shared the same bed for seven years. After our separation, I couldn't bring myself to keep it — though I tried, as furniture can be so expensive. It had become more than just a bed — it was a symbol of the emotional and physical intimacy we'd shared. I didn't fully realize just how much the presence of that bed weighed on me until it was gone. Once I got rid of it, I noticed a difference almost immediately: My sleep improved, which confirmed I wasn't being dramatic about its emotional impact after all. Photos of Us Despite our split, my ex and I share a daughter, so I didn't go as far as shredding all our photos or deleting digital files. She deserves to have access to those memories should she want them. What I did do, however, was get rid of anything framed or on display. As time passed and our daughter got older, I kept a few photos of the three of us and of her with her dad around my home. It's one small way we can continue to show her that, while our family dynamic has changed, we are still a loving and united unit. Decor We Compromised On I've always had a very specific aesthetic, so it was (admittedly) frustrating when my ex and I disagreed on home decor. When I moved out, I donated everything we had met each other halfway on. In a way, it became a physical reminder of compromises I'd made — and not just for the sake of home decor. Getting rid of these items cleared up space for pieces that I actually found beautiful and meaningful. It was surprisingly empowering to create a space that truly reflected who I am. Clothes He Liked I never bought clothes solely based on my ex's preferences, but I did gravitate toward certain items he liked for special occasions or date nights. After our divorce, those pieces lost their appeal. I wanted my closet to be filled only with things I loved, not items that were a reminder of someone else's taste. It felt freeing to shed that extra layer of connection. Anything 'Extra' The chaos of divorce led me to embrace a sort of 'if it doesn't serve me, it's gone' mindset. If something wasn't useful or didn't spark joy, it was out the door. This is probably an effective way to declutter in any circumstance, but for me, the act of purging felt incredibly necessary. Despite thinking of myself as relatively minimalist before, this process left me with less stuff than ever — and during such a difficult time, that was a huge relief. Further Reading We Used Our New 'Room Plan' Tool to Give This Living Room 3 Distinct Styles — See How, Then Try It Yourself The Design Changemakers to Know in 2025 Create Your Own 3D Room Plan with Our New Tool Sign up for Apartment Therapy's Daily email newsletter to receive our favorite posts, tours, products, and shopping guides in your inbox. Solve the daily Crossword

I'm a step-parenting coach and I see families make the same 5 mistakes. Here's how to avoid them.
I'm a step-parenting coach and I see families make the same 5 mistakes. Here's how to avoid them.

Yahoo

time5 days ago

  • General
  • Yahoo

I'm a step-parenting coach and I see families make the same 5 mistakes. Here's how to avoid them.

I've been a stepmom for 16 years and now coach families on how build healthy relationships. Blended families often face challenges due to grief and complex emotions, which can be overlooked. It's important for stepparents to focus on support, not control, to foster healthy relationships. Before I became a certified step-parenting coach, I myself was a stepmom drowning in a role I didn't know how to play. As a new stepmom, I was incredibly optimistic about our future as a blended family. But within the first year, I found myself feeling anxious, insecure, and attempting to micromanage everyone and everything around me. No one had prepared me for the emotional landmines that come with blending a family. I have been a stepmom now for 16 years and have had the opportunity to work with hundreds of stepparents through my coaching business. Through the years, I've often seen the same mistakes repeated by many families. These mistakes do not make you a bad stepparent. They make you human. With time, support, and realistic expectations, it is possible to build blended family relationships that are deeply are the five top things every stepparent should avoid, and what to do instead. Having expectations of an "instant family" It is easy to get caught up in the societal pressure to create a real family before the relationships are fully ready and able to support that. Many stepparents come in "love blind" and assume the rest of the family will meet them with the same energy. The hard truth is blended families are formed from some form of loss. Whether it's a divorce, death of a parent, or the lack of a family unit from the start, there is grief involved. When you expect instant connection without allowing space for those complex emotions to exist, you set yourself up for disappointment. Relationships in blended families are slow to develop. They are often one step forward, two steps back. The goal should be allowing them to evolve naturally and on their own unique timeline. Being overly involved in your partner's coparenting relationship It's easy to think you're just being helpful when you offer suggestions, share insights, or ask for things to be done differently, especially when those decisions directly affect your home, your routines, and your peace. But getting too involved too soon in how your partner interacts with their ex or other coparent can lead to more tension, not less. Your role is not to fix or manage their coparenting relationship. It's to support your partner from within your own relationship. That often means protecting your peace by setting clear boundaries, not by trying to control how they communicate, make decisions, or handle parenting with their ex. You can honor your own values without micromanaging every part of a dynamic you did not create. Comparing yourself to the ex Comparison is the fastest way to lose your sense of identity in this role. Whether it's how your partner's ex parents, the bond they have with their children, or the history they share with your partner, it is easy to measure yourself against them and come up short every time. You are not here to compete with anyone's past. You are here to build something new. Needing validation from your stepkids We all want to be liked, especially by our stepkids. As a stepparent, it is easy to read into every interaction, scanning for signs of approval or acceptance. But expecting your stepchildren to consistently reassure you puts pressure on an already fragile relationship. It is not your stepkids' job to make you feel secure in this role. Their only job is to be a deserve the freedom to be kids, not peacekeepers or emotional caretakers in a complex adult world. That validation and support should come from your partner and when needed, a trusted professional. Taking things personally When a stepchild pulls away or refuses to engage, it can feel deeply personal. The same is true when a coparent refuses to acknowledge you, communicate directly, or include you in important decisions. But it is often not about who you are. It is about what you represent. You may be a reminder of the family they lost, the control they did not have, or the changes they never wanted. Recognizing that their behavior stems from their own narrative can shift your entire perspective. Read the original article on Business Insider Solve the daily Crossword

Matt Poole's new girlfriend hits back at troll who claimed she was 'trying so hard' to be the mother of Tammy Hembrow's daughter
Matt Poole's new girlfriend hits back at troll who claimed she was 'trying so hard' to be the mother of Tammy Hembrow's daughter

Daily Mail​

time7 days ago

  • Entertainment
  • Daily Mail​

Matt Poole's new girlfriend hits back at troll who claimed she was 'trying so hard' to be the mother of Tammy Hembrow's daughter

Matt Poole's girlfriend Annelyse Oatway has hit back after an online critic accused her of 'trying too hard' to be a 'mother' to the former Ironman's young daughter Posy, who he shares with ex Tammy Hembrow. Poole, 34, welcomed the baby in June 2022, but later split with Hembrow that December. He started dating Annelyse in early 2023, and in May this year, the couple welcomed their first child. Taking to her Instagram stories on Thursday, Annelyse spoke frankly about her relationship with three-year-old Posy. She made her comments during a question and answer session, after one user asked, 'Why do you act so hard to be Posy's mum when Matt hasn't even proposed to you?' From A-list scandals and red carpet mishaps to exclusive pictures and viral moments, subscribe to the DailyMail's new showbiz newsletter to stay in the loop. Annelyse kept her cool during her lengthy reply though she was clearly irritated by the intrusive question. 'This one has come up quite a lot in the last few months so I think I should address it,' she began. 'First of all I want to start off by saying what does a ring have to do with anything? 'Things happened quite fast with Matt and I as it was, so we are just taking our time with what we need to.' And then in a surprise twist, Annelyse revealed a heartbreaking secret about her own family life. 'As to 'acting' like Posy's mum,' she said. 'I grew up in a broken family with a step mum who I did not get along with. That really affected me growing up. I never ever wanted Posy to feel the way I felt growing up.' She then stated firmly that she had never 'ever, ever, ever' tried to be Posy's mother. 'I always make it clear to her that I am her bestie,' she said. Annelyse also shared intimate domestic details. 'I include her mum in things. She [Posy] has always got her momma. That's not my role. Still, she added: 'I have helped raise her since she was one and a half. I have taken her to appointments, to swimming, to dancing and toilet trained her. 'And she's family to me.' It comes after Matt Poole appeared to take a thinly veiled swipe at his ex, Tammy last month. The swimming coach, who split from the fitness influencer at the end of 2023, shed light on the difficulties of co-parenting after receiving 'fifty missed calls and messages' from Tammy. He said it was 'never easy' raising children separately, especially when it comes to travel arrangements. Tammy, 31, fled the country in the wake of her split from husband Matt Zukowski, 29. At the time, she shared to Instagram she was heading to Queenstown with her kids. Matt and Annelyse's romance, meanwhile first sparked in early 2023, following his split from Tammy in December 2022. Their relationship blossomed and, after two years of dating, they have now grown their family. Annelyse, who keeps a relatively low profile online despite her 10,000 Instagram followers, is originally from the Gold Coast, Queensland.

Asking Eric: Daughter's boyfriend declared himself king of the house
Asking Eric: Daughter's boyfriend declared himself king of the house

Washington Post

time22-07-2025

  • General
  • Washington Post

Asking Eric: Daughter's boyfriend declared himself king of the house

Dear Eric: My daughter has a 'live-in boyfriend' who, since he moved in, thinks he is the king of the household. He is very disrespectful to me, her dad and her stepmom. I tolerated the stuff he said about her dad, and I tolerated him skipping paying my daughter his share of the mortgage for a few months. But when it got so she almost lost her house, I was very upset to say the least.

115+ Nicknames for Stepmoms as Unique as She Is
115+ Nicknames for Stepmoms as Unique as She Is

Yahoo

time22-05-2025

  • Entertainment
  • Yahoo

115+ Nicknames for Stepmoms as Unique as She Is

A stepmother can be such a beautiful, additional blessing in a child's life. Many lucky children not only get one mom who loves them, but they get two! Make sure your stepmom knows that she has a special place in your heart with these interesting and unique nicknames for stepmoms. Take the word "mom" and give it a tweak. It might end up being the perfect nickname for the other mother in your life. Mimzie Mumzie Mimi MM - stands for "My Mom" S-Mom Mamacita - means "little mother" Mamoo Mams Aunt Mom Mama Bear Meems Momette Mombo Stom - a combination of "step" and "mom" Steppers Stepsie Mams Mammie Momily Momaloo Your stepmom is a boss lady. She is a take-charge, run-the-world superhuman who you admire and took up to. Let her nickname reflect her top dog nature. Alpha Mom Boss Lady Queen Bee Miss M -stands for Miss Mom Toughie Ma Maj - her majesty Sec - short for a mom who is the family secretary Exec Momager Enforcer Keeper - she is the keeper of the home Wonder Woman Honcho Super Steps Master S Major Mom Kitchen Queen Empress Team Leader F.C. - family coordinator If the banter and playfulness between you and your stepmom is something that you love and cherish, give her a funny nickname that will bring a smile to both of your faces. Mom Bomb Tiger Mom Faux Mom Stepmonster Dos - Spanish for the number 2 Twin Mom Mother Hen Uddermudder Other Mother The Repeat Mom 2: Electric Boogaloo Mamadukes M & M - because she is just too sweet ESM - evil stepmother, which is only funny because she totally is not evil Mama Llama S-awesome - for an awesome stepmother She has saved you in so many ways and while she didn't give birth to you, she is your mother in every sense of the word. Your stepmom deserves a sentimental nickname that highlights your love for her. MaLo - a combination of Ma and love Lovie - any child with a mommy and a lovie is a lucky kiddo Bonus Mom - because she really is a bonus to your life 2M - for second mother SS - sweet stepmom My (her name) - examples: My Christina or My Maria SheMa O-Ma - stands for "other mom" Mom-i-cle - part mom and part miracle The Beat - she is the beat of your heart Hero - enough said Mom-Star - she is a star to you Sugar Key - with her your secrets are under lock and key She raised you just like you were her own. These nicknames work for a stepmom who never thought twice about dedicating her life to you. ReMa - sweet nickname for someone you consider to be your real mom or a redo mom Net or Nettie - she is your safety net Hugs - your favorite thing from her Mama Soul - because she has yours G.A. - stands for guardian angel Glory Stepshine - play on sunshine Rock Faithful Step-Steady Compass Things between the two of you have not always been easy, but through it all, you and your stepmom continue to love and support one another in good times and in bad. These nicknames suit a stepmother who can be both a prize and a pill. Chain - you are the ball to her chain Sparring Partner Rumble Storms Fire - she is fire and you are ice, but you love each other, nonetheless Bumps Momplicated Rainbow - because there is beautiful after a storm Use your stepmother's first name to help you come up with a creative and personalized nickname for her. Here are some examples of stepmom nicknames that use birth names. Mamy - Amy Momica - Monica Mama "B" - a stepmother whose name begins with the letter "B" Marge in Charge - Marge Memma - Emma Momaline - Madeline Momstina - Christina Mava - Ava Millian - Lillian Mo Jo - Joleen, Joellen, Josephine Mummaliese - Annaliese If you call your biological mother "mom," think about using culture and heritage in your nickname for a stepmother who means the world to you. These words mean "mom" in different languages. Màna - Greek Matka - Polish Ammi - Urdu Mammy - Irish and Scottish Madre - Spanish Muminka - Czech Maman - French Mae - Portuguese Motina - Lithuanian Ema - Estonian Haha - Japanese Tina - Samoan Ina - Filipino Me - Vietnamese Mati - Croatian Anya - Hungarian While relationships between stepchildren and stepparents can be wonderful, beautiful, and enriching, they can also be tedious. With two moms in your life, you will want to make sure that each lady knows that they hold a special and unique space in your life. Choose nicknames for moms, both your birth mom and stepmom, that illustrate an equal footing and status. Nicknames can be witty and funny, but should never be offensive. Do not choose something that might cause hurt feelings.

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