The true cost of marriage in Japan: Who really pays the price?
The overall number of marriages grew slightly in 2024, but Japan's birth rate crisis has only worsened. And yet a survey by the Tokyo Chamber of Commerce and Industry states that young people want to get married and have families. So what gives?
Marriage is a deeply complicated subject beyond any romantic or cultural notions of love. In order to understand it better, analyzing the deeper financial, physical and mental costs of marriage is vital. These, in turn, differ dramatically by gender.
For the purposes of this article, only heterosexual marriages will be considered, as they are the only form of marriage legally recognized in Japan.
The hidden costs of love and money in Japan
Short- and long-term financial issues can make or break relationships.
Image: anuwat Dangsungnoen/iStock
Most people have felt the ongoing cost-of-living crisis impacting their wallets. Staple foods and utilities have gone up, and overall wages have stagnated. Suffice to say, spending on dating is risky, but not spending is also problematic. According to the Japanese Gender Equality Bureau, not providing financially for a partner or paying one's share in a relationship is a form of domestic violence.
Being single doesn't imply financial security either. Men in their 20s, according to the 2022 Employment Status Survey by the Japan Statistics Bureau, earn an average annual salary of less than ¥3 million. Given that the Japanese gender wage gap puts women's income at roughly 70% to 80% that of men, more than half of young Japanese women struggle to make ends meet.
...more than half of young Japanese women struggle to make ends meet. Marriage is just as much a financial burden.
Marriage is just as much a financial burden. Aside from the average wedding costing around ¥4.15 million according to a Zexy.net article (Japanese), marriage itself involves making major, life-altering financial decisions. Unless both people are earning a commensurate wage, it can be very difficult to determine how to balance spending and saving as a couple.
Income and debts, spending versus saving, and long-term financial plans regarding homeownership and retirement — these are all fundamental questions a couple should discuss before marriage is even on the table. Financial instability puts an incredible amount of strain on both people in a relationship and can quickly become a point of contention.
'I earn far less than my wife each month because I'm an English teacher. I've cut back on buying things for myself, but even that doesn't seem to make things easier. We've put off having kids as a result, which I know she's not happy about,' said Steven, a 31-year-old American.
The physical price of partnership — especially for women
Marriages impact women's physical health more than you'd think.
Image: anuwat Dangsungnoen/iStock
Marriage — or long-term cohabitation — affects men and women differently in terms of their physical health. It's a well-established fact that in the majority of cultures, women are expected to take care of the home and any children, while men work outside the home.
Married men are typically healthier than those who are single, divorced or widowed, according to Harvard Health Publishing. The general consensus of these studies is that married men live longer because their wives keep track of their health and nutrition for them — rather than anything married men do that single men don't. This may also contribute to the statistic that men are more likely to die from 'broken heart syndrome' — a condition that prevents people's hearts from contracting properly according to an NBC News article — despite it being a condition more often found in women. Men suffer worse cardiovascular outcomes when they lose a spouse to divorce or death than women do.
Married women, on the other hand, are not better off physically when compared to single women, according to these same studies. The American Psychological Association found that marriage only benefits women's physical health when it comes with a high level of sexual and emotional satisfaction. Findings from the Canadian Longitudinal Study on Aging determined that married and single women were virtually identical in terms of overall physical health at any age.
Childbirth is another major factor to consider. Pregnancy has a major, lasting impact on women. According to a study conducted by Lancet Global Health, about 40 million women a year experience long-term health complications caused by pregnancy. These include pain during sexual intercourse (affecting 35% of postpartum women), permanent low back pain (32%), anal incontinence (19%), urinary incontinence (8% to 31%) and secondary infertility. This does not take into account the mental and emotional consequences.
Numerous studies have also found that women are far more likely to be divorced if they become seriously ill. A study published in the journal Cancer found a woman is six times more likely to be separated or divorced soon after receiving a diagnosis than a male patient.
Women are the least likely to benefit from marriage, no matter where they are in the world
'In sickness and in health, my ass. Men walk out as soon as they learn their wife is sick more often than not. They can't handle it. And if they don't walk out, they cheat and marry someone else as soon as their wife dies or the divorce goes through. It's sick, but I see it so often I'm not surprised anymore,' said Hannah, a 54-year-old Canadian oncology nurse.
Mental health and marriage: Who really benefits?
Mental health is just as greatly impacted by marriage as physical health.
Image: MTStock Studio/iStock
Married people are, on the whole, less likely to suffer from depression. One peer-reviewed study by Scimex found that unmarried people have a 79% higher risk of depression than married people. It further concluded that the innate support network of marriage and shared financial resources likely contribute to improved mental health for both spouses. A happy marriage is one that protects both spouses' mental health in direct and indirect ways; however, definitions of what constitutes a happy marriage vary greatly.
Divorce is hard, but staying in an unhappy marriage is worse. A Michigan State University study concluded that worsening marital quality contributed to a faster rate of cognitive decline in men, while staying can also lead to increased rates of depression for both spouses. These in turn can cause or exacerbate lifestyle- and stress-related medical conditions.
Comparatively, single women are far happier with their lives than married women, single men or married men. They report higher levels of satisfaction with their relationship status, life overall and sex lives, and a lower desire for a partner than anyone else.
The harsh bottom line on marriage in Japan: Women still lose out
Marriage may seem like a pipe dream in the near future.
Image: recep-bg/iStock
Communication issues can impact a relationship, but the financial, physical and mental costs can destroy one. Women are the least likely to benefit from marriage, no matter where they are in the world, and that in turn impacts men and childbirth rates as well. Can these costs be balanced in order to make marriage and childbirth worth it?
The short answer is: no, they can't. It's impossible to make things equal in society at present. In a decade or two, perhaps — but only if dramatic changes are made. The gender differences in the costs of marriage, if they continue as they are, will always mean one partner loses out.
© Japan Today
Hashtags
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
The Mainichi
44 minutes ago
- The Mainichi
More Japanese consumers in Gunma Pref. turning to foreigner-owned shops for rice
An increasing number of Japanese consumers in Gunma Prefecture, which has one of the highest ratios of foreign residents per unit of population in the country, were seen turning to foreign-owned stores to buy imported rice amid high prices and shortages of the grain in early June. In the prefecture, many shops and convenience stores operated by individuals from Asia and South America offer rice from countries such as Thailand and India. Since the outbreak of a rice crisis last summer, more Japanese customers have apparently been purchasing these products. At Alh Mini Mart and Restaurant in the city of Tatebayashi, more than 10 varieties of rice from countries such as Thailand and Pakistan are sold. According to Aung Tin, a member of the Rohingya Muslim minority from Myanmar who manages the establishment, most buyers were initially foreigners from Myanmar and other countries, but the number of Japanese customers has increased since last year. California rice is also sold at this store. Not only is Japonica rice, commonly consumed by Japanese people, selling well at the store, but so is the long-grain Indica rice. The basmati variety is often used in biryani -- a dish where rice and meat are cooked with spices. Biryani is served at the restaurant attached to the store. Aung Tin shared a cooking tip, saying, "We layer cooked rice and ingredients in a commercial rice cooker and steam them. The key is to keep the rice firm when cooking." According to the Gunma Prefectural Government, as of the end of December 2024, there were 81,396 foreign residents in Gunma, accounting for 4.3% of the prefecture's population. This ratio is among the highest in Japan, alongside Tokyo and Aichi Prefecture. The increase in stores and restaurants run by Vietnamese and Nepalese people has made foreign rice more accessible. At the south exit of JR Maebashi Station, where Japanese language schools operate and students take buses to part-time jobs, the convenience store Chyandora sells jasmine rice produced in Thailand and Vietnam. While 70% of the customers are foreigners, roughly 30% are Japanese. Neupane Bhesham Raj, a Nepalese representative director, noted, "With the rise in rice prices in Japan, purchases by Japanese customers significantly increased." The Vietnamese Japonica rice is particularly popular among Japanese customers. "The taste is quite similar to Japanese rice," he said. Private imports also spiked. Beliatta Lanka Co., a wholesaler and retailer in Bando, Ibaraki Prefecture, imports rice for Chyandora. Beliatta Lanka pays a tariff of 341 yen (some $2.30) per kilogram for private imports. The company's Sri Lankan representative director stated, "The demand for foreign rice is increasing, and retail prices are also rising." (Japanese original by Tetsuya Shoji, Maebashi Bureau)
Asahi Shimbun
44 minutes ago
- Asahi Shimbun
The ups and downs of luring rich tourists to less-known areas
Operators of overseas travel agencies catering to wealthy clients observe a craftsman working at a Kaga Yuzen workshop in Kanazawa in February. (Yoko Masuda) Japanese areas that may not be household names among international tourists are increasingly appearing on the bucket lists of rich travelers. The efforts of government and tourism agencies to bring affluent visitors to Japan's lesser-known regions appear to be paying off. Luxury tour packages are consistently filled, and the visitors have no qualms about opening up their wallets to pour money into local economies. But questions about such tourism packages are being raised by local residents, many of whom say they are not feeling the benefits of hosting wealthy foreigners. Critics say efforts to cater to rich tourists have fueled increases in land prices that have driven out residents and created imbalances in local labor markets. INTO CULTURE The Japan National Tourism Organization (JNTO) is pitching lesser-known regions to travel agencies that curate trips to Japan for deep-pocketed clients. One such destination is Kanazawa, the capital of Ishikawa Prefecture. At a workshop nestled in residential district of Kanazawa, six foreigners watched kimono fabric being dyed in the traditional Kaga Yuzen technique passed down for centuries in the city. The visitors were all travel agency executives who flew to Japan in February at the JNTO's invitation. Gideon Nurick, a visitor who runs a travel agency in Vancouver, said Japan's attention to hygiene has heightened its popularity among travelers in the post-pandemic era. He said he will recommend Kanazawa to his customers. The JNTO started offering such inspection tours for foreign travel agencies in 2017. Although a tour to a dyeing workshop in Kanagawa costs 50,000 yen ($345) per visitor on average, hordes of international tourists have signed up, according to the Kanazawa City Tourism Association. 'Eighty percent of visitors to our workshop are from overseas, and the rest are Japanese officials in the kimono industry,' said Hitoshi Maida, a Kaga Yuzen craftsman who guided the inspection tour. Many of the tourists, he added, snap up pricy products sold at the workshop, such as glass panels sandwiching a piece of silk kimono cloth dyed in Kaga Yuzen style for display. A large one costs up to 2 million yen. GROWTH IN RICH TOURISTS Japan saw a record 36.87 million international arrivals in 2024, who spent a record high 8.14 trillion yen during their stay. The average per person was 227,000 yen. But some forked out several times more, and these are the tourists that the JNTO's program is targeting. An affluent visitor is defined as someone who spends at least 1 million yen during the stay in Japan. According to a JNTO study in 2023, affluent visitors accounted for only 2.4 percent of all foreign tourists, but their consumption represented 19.1 percent of the total. McKinsey & Company Inc., a management consulting firm, expects tourism catering to the privileged to grow faster than other industries, citing a rise in the global population of people with $1 million in net assets. The Japanese government is focusing on bringing well-heeled tourists to local destinations to achieve its target of 15 trillion yen in tourism revenue by 2030. INFRASTRUCTURE DEMAND Big spending travelers feel discouraged from visiting areas with no five-star hotels or five-star services, according to the Japan Tourism Agency. Takehiro Okamoto, co-CEO of Tokyo-based travel agency Wondertrunk & Co., said high-quality infrastructure and services are a must for regional areas aiming to become destinations for prosperous travelers. 'No matter how charming local regions are, we cannot recommend visits to sites if the equivalent of five-star hotels and comfortable transportation are not available,' said Okamoto, whose agency arranges tailor-made tours for the super-rich via travel agents in the United States and Europe. He said its typical clients stay in exclusive hotels and travel in chauffeur-driven vehicles with a personal tour guide. They each spend about 3 million yen during their stay in Japan. Okamoto said his company's sales almost doubled in 2024 from a year earlier because of a surge in foreign tourists. The Japan Tourism Agency in 2023 and 2024 designated 14 locations as 'model' regional sites to attract affluent tourists. 'The economic benefit will be exceedingly high and contribute to the revitalization of the regional economy,' the agency said on its website. One of the model sites is the Setouchi region, which consists of seven prefectures, including Hyogo, Hiroshima and Kagawa, around the Seto Inland Sea. After the selection in 2023, Setouchi tourism officials attended the Monaco Yacht Show last year to better understand the type of tourism big spenders prefer. The officials' catchphrase now is that the rich can make a journey in the Seto Inland Sea on their large yacht. A trip on a luxury cruise ship has been popular in the region. The two-night, three-day cruise on the Guntu ship costs between 600,000 yen and 1 million yen per passenger. The cruises have been booked to capacity, according to the operator. One magnet in the region is Naoshima, a small island filled with museums and famed installations in Kagawa Prefecture. It has been called a 'modern art haven.' The number of tourists taking helicopter rides to Naoshima from Kyoto or Osaka is rising, according to local officials. At least eight upscale hotels, many of them using foreign capital, are expected to open in the region by the end of 2029, according to the Inland Sea, Setouchi Tourism Authority, a consortium of tourism companies from the seven prefectures. Among them is Mandarin Oriental in Takamatsu, Kagawa Prefecture, which is scheduled to open in 2027 with a spa and swimming pool. The room charge will start at around 80,000 yen. Another hotel with a quaint atmosphere is expected to open on Naoshima around the same time. Tourists to the Setouchi region provided 183.5 billion yen in revenue in 2024, up 45 percent from a year earlier, according to an estimate by the Inland Sea, Setouchi Tourism Authority. The figure is the highest since the organization began collecting such data in 2017. The average monthly wage in the lodging industry in the region was 250,000 yen in 2024, 23,000 yen higher than in 2018, the year before the coronavirus pandemic struck. The 2024 figure is lower than the national average of 269,000 yen for services industries. But the wage growth in the region's tourism-related sector is steeper than in other regions. A majority of locals are skeptical about whether promoting tourism will truly benefit their communities. In a 2024 questionnaire of residents in Setouchi, 44.2 percent said they felt the economic benefits of tourism, down about 4 percentage points year on year. The ratio of respondents who felt little or no economic upside from tourism stood at 55.7 percent. 'An increasing number of residents have begun to view foreign tourists, including higher spending travelers, in a negative light as they become more aware of the unfavorable aspects of overtourism that have cropped up in many parts of Japan,' said Hiroshi Sakamoto, senior managing director of the Inland Sea, Setouchi Tourism Authority. LABOR PITFALLS Yoshihiro Sataki, a professor of tourism policy at Josai International University in Chiba Prefecture, said hosting luxury accommodations in regional areas can put a strain on other sectors because job hunters will likely flock to the better-paying positions at upscale hotels. At Niseko, an internationally renowned ski resort in Hokkaido, a housekeeper at a luxury hotel could earn more than 2,000 yen an hour during high season, double the minimum wage for Hokkaido, in 2024. The trend of locals seeking jobs at high-end facilities makes it even more difficult for operators of nursing care centers and restaurants that are already suffering from chronic labor shortages. In Kyoto, construction of luxury hotels has led to soaring land prices and higher housing costs for residents. The trend has had disastrous consequences for the ancient capital. More Japanese residents moved out of Kyoto than from any other Japanese city for three straight years from 2020. The exodus included many families raising young children. Toshiya Miyazaki, chief researcher with Mitsubishi Research Institute who is well-versed in tourism policy, said focusing on big spenders can help the local economy, given their strong interest in the traditions and cultural heritage of their destinations. 'If they purchase expensive classical handicrafts of local regions that average Japanese cannot afford, it will contribute to the preservation of the traditional craft industry,' he said. But he warned against overreliance on tourism. He said while Nara Prefecture is widely seen as a heavily tourism-oriented prefecture, its tourism industry makes up less than 10 percent of the overall amount of local banks' outstanding loans. 'Relying on tourism as the largest single source of revenue is a wrong approach,' he said. 'A rise in higher-spending visitors alone will not be enough to bolster the regional economy.'
Asahi Shimbun
44 minutes ago
- Asahi Shimbun
Soft tennis champion Yuta Funemizu takes on U.S. pickleball
With new courts to conquer, Japanese soft tennis champion Yuta Funemizu is taking his championship game to U.S. pickleball. Funemizu, 31, has a sterling record in soft tennis, which is a variant of the sport using a lighter, softer ball and usually lighter and less tightly strung rackets. Funemizu was a Waseda University student when he played for the Japanese national team, which captured a world championship. As a working adult, he played for the powerhouse Nippon Telegraph and Telephone West Corp., recently renamed NTT West Inc., and made a name for himself as a leading professional player. But the sorrows and lack of recognition that came with being a star in a minor sport never really left him. 'We were never in the spotlight, even after winning 10 successive victories in the Japan (soft tennis) league,' Funemizu said. Funemizu was soon to turn 30 when Soichiro Minami, founder of the job transfer service operator BizReach Inc., introduced him to pickleball, which was surging in popularity in the United States. He was thus initiated to this fateful 'job transfer.' Pickleball players use 'paddles,' resembling oversized table tennis paddles, to hit a perforated plastic ball toward each other on a roughly badminton-size court. Invented in the United States in the 1960s, the sport saw a sharp rise in popularity during the COVID-19 pandemic. The main draw of pickleball lies in its ease, which allows players to enjoy rallying even as beginners. Some say more than 50 million people have played pickleball in the United States, where Major League Pickleball, a professional league, was founded in 2021. 'I found the sport so appealing that I decided it was worthwhile to stake my life on going after it,' Funemizu said. He enlisted Minami's help to go to the United States in January last year. 'I will compete in more matches than anybody else and acquire skills in a year that it would normally take three or four years to master,' Funemizu said he thought at the time. A team selected him during a draft in March this year, which made him the first Japanese major leaguer in the sport. Funemizu operates a YouTube channel, where he openly shares his impatience at having to sit out matches. He has also started a crowdfunding project for covering his tour expenses. 'I hope my donors will enjoy, with me, this journey I am making to the world's top place,' Funemizu said. The sheer grandeur and plainness of his dream appear likely to endear him to many a supporter.
