Chris McQueer: ‘Misogyny and loneliness. My novel's a barrel of laughs'
Chris McQueer is a Glaswegian author and former crime scene cleaner. He's been described by the actor Martin Compston as 'like Charlie Brooker on Buckfast'. McQueer published his first novel, Hermit, in February.
My maw picking me up from nursery. I remember sitting on a bench while she helped put my trainers on — the wrong feet. I remember both of us laughing at how funny it looked. My maw was quite young when she had me and was still figuring it all out along the way.
Camping with my granny and granda, maybe in Loch Lomond. My granny slept in the motor because my granda's snoring was quite incredible. Tensions were high but I had a great time.
A chicken kebab from Cookies on Hope Street in Glasgow. Me and my pal, both joyously three sheets to the wind, stood using a bin as a dining table, and devoured our kebabs in silence. The only communication we had was the odd glance, mid-chew, and nodding. Nothing has ever come close.
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. I think it's the most perfect film ever made, and I have to watch it once a year or else I fear I may die. I remember as a wee guy wanting Charlie to find a golden ticket so badly I was almost sick. When they go into the chocolate factory for the first time I still get goosebumps. It's endlessly quotable as well; I often myself blurting out, 'I want a bean feast!' for no real reason.
I had arrived back at the Tolbooth on Saltmarket after going to a Celtic game up at Tannadice, I think. I was the last person off the supporters' bus, steaming of course, and, in front of a crowd of dozens of people, missed the last step, slipped and landed square on my arse in a puddle.
The road through Glencoe. Beautiful, dramatic landscapes. Surreal light. It's got everything.
It was, and still is, my granny. She's always been the one to put an arm around my shoulder or give me a kick up the arse when needed. I've never seen her back down or shy away from any situation, no matter how difficult. I always aspire to be like her.
Probably every single Gladiator when I was a wee guy but the first celebrity crush I ever had a poster of was Katie Price, believe it or not.
Timmy, my old dug who no longer lives with me but with my granny and granda. We had a one-sided falling out a couple of years ago, he decided he no longer wanted to be my pal one day. I've clearly annoyed him or slighted him in some way, unbeknownst to me, so I'd apologise to him for whatever it was.
Joesef at King Tut's in 2019. Seeing Joesef on stage, this guy I vaguely knew online for years and through mutual pals, in front of a sold-out Glasgow crowd with his gorgeous voice was incredible. Some boy.
Probably Hogganfield Loch in the east end of Glasgow. I've lived just down the road from it for most of my life and going there for a wander during the height of summer or the dead of winter is always magic. Taking my old dug, Henry, there for the first time after we adopted him is my favourite memory. Me, my maw and my granda, letting the dug off the lead for the first time and him running and jumping headfirst into the loch was absolutely class to see.
This Must Be the Place by Talking Heads, specifically the Stop Making Sense version. It's an absolutely unbelievable song which, to me, perfectly encapsulates that feeling of being in love where everything feels joyous, whimsical, surreal and amazing. When it comes on in the motor, I have to listen twice, sometimes three times in a row.
It's about a wee guy called Jamie and his maw, Fiona. Jamie is struggling mentally, is absolutely bogging and can barely leave his room. He spends his time online talking to his wee pal, Lee, who is being radicalised into misogynistic ways of thinking which is starting to poison Jamie's mind too. Fiona is dealing with the aftermath of leaving her abusive ex-partner and has no idea what Jamie is up to in his room. She is caught blindsided when he disappears. The book looks at things like toxic masculinity, the rise of online misogyny, loneliness and mother/son relationships. A real barrel of laughs!
Chris McQueer's novel, Hermit, is out now (Wildfire, £18.99). Order from timesbookshop.co.uk. Discount for Times+ members. See him at the Edinburgh International Book Festival, Aug 22, 5pm, with Elaine Castillo and Catherine Prasifka, edbookfest.co.uk
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