Funny Childhood Misconceptions That Will Make You Laugh

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a day ago

Kids have very active imaginations. They see the world in a totally different way! Of course, this can lead to some pretty funny mix-ups, misunderstandings, and lots of make-believe. Reddit user Night_sky2025 recently asked, "What was the weirdest thing you believed as a child?" Here are some of the wild, hilarious, and wholesome responses:
"When I was pretty young, I learned the word 'fired' in reference to guns. I didn't know that it also referred to being terminated from a job. So it was with confused horror that I observed my mom casually inform my dad that her coworker, Jody, had apparently been shot to death at work for her subpar job performance. And it was unnerving how casually my dad reacted to it, with little more than a, 'Oh man, that's too bad.' For quite a while, I became quite invested in my mom's work performance."
"My dad was a pilot, so he was gone a lot when I was a kid. My mom often took us to Chuck E. Cheese when my dad was on a trip. I eventually noticed we only went there when Dad was gone, so I asked him why he never wanted to go with us. He told me he was the guy in the mouse costume and was always there; he just wasn't allowed to interact with us. For many years, I genuinely believed this. We laugh about it now."
"As a kid, I believed you were supposed to pray to God when you wanted good things to happen and pray to Satan when you wanted bad things to happen. Like, two separate customer service departments."
"Endora from Bewitched was real and could see me through the TV, so I had to clap and act super grateful for Bewitched or she would curse me."
"Someone told me Canadians eat toast upside-down because that places the toast toppings in direct contact with taste buds. Young me believed Canadians were very clever for coming up with this toast-eating method and would occasionally give it a go myself. I met a Canadian as a fully grown adult and asked him if my 'fact' was true. Understandably, he was politely mystified. "
"I believed that brown cows were the ones that made chocolate milk, and the black/white cows made the regular milk. Pink cows made strawberry milk, and farmers had to hide them in their barn because they were afraid someone would steal the pink cows because everyone loved strawberry milk."
"That we had two stomachs: one for liquids and one for solids. When people would say, 'It went down the wrong pipe,' I assumed it was liquids vs. solids, not solids vs. gas."
"I was told to leave my cuts and scrapes alone because when I went to sleep, little, tiny people would crawl into my bed and build the scabs themselves using their tools, and I'd be rude if I messed with their work by picking at it. I used to want to catch these little tiny people. To be fair, I never saw a scab develop. I'd just wake up, and it would be there, for it seemed legit. Thanks, Mom."
"That the new president of the US had beaten up the previous president to get the job. I spent so much of my young life hating Ronald Reagan, not for his policies, because I was unaware of them, but because I thought he had beaten up Jimmy Carter, and Jimmy Carter seemed like a nice man."
"So many things. One of my favorites is that my grandpa told me the neighbors behind them were building a shed for an elephant. It was big enough for one, and my grandpa worked with the circus, so it was totally plausible. It's still referred to as the 'elephant shed.'"
"My parents told me that TV was black and white before because the world was actually black and white. Then, a colorful meteorite struck the Earth and gave color to the world. In my defense, I was very little."
"That there could be cameras in our house filming a TV show like other families (The Brady Bunch, The Partridge Family, etc.)."
"You know, in infomercials, when they say, 'But you gotta call right now to get this deal!'? I used to think they kept track of what time their commercials aired, and started a few-minute timer after they aired, and if you called after the timer ran out, you wouldn't get the deal."
"I thought shooting stars were make-believe like unicorns and leprechauns. I was well into my 20s before I figured it out. Still never seen one though."
"I remember my dad telling me that part of his job was firing people. I imagined him taking them up on a hill at night, building a campfire around them, and lighting them up. I didn't understand why anyone would allow this to happen to them, even if they were bad at their job."
"My parents were raised Catholic and didn't want to force it on me, so I never went to church or read the Bible or anything. Didn't want to. It seemed boring. All of my religious influence came from outside sources that I felt pretty separated from, so I kind of didn't know Jesus was a religious figure. All I knew was what I saw on TV and read brief references. Seeing different versions of Jesus was especially confusing because if he were a real guy, we wouldn't be able to redesign him, right? So for a really long time, maybe until I was 11 or 12, I fully believed Jesus was a type of character. Like a wizard or the Good King sorta deal. He was just 'That Brand of Guy.' If you will, an improv prompt, or some kind of role that needs to be filled in for a story. I still think that, but I thought everyone else thought that, too."
"I used to believe the 'Gray Pumpkin' would come the night of Halloween to take some of the candy my brother and I collected in exchange for toys. As it turns out, this was just a fun little lie my mom told us so that I, a kid with a severe nut allergy, wouldn't feel as bad about not being able to eat like 75% of the candy I collected. Also, it was supposed to be the 'Great Pumpkin' (from Charlie Brown), but I misheard, so I always imagined a large, gray pumpkin with arms and legs sneaking into our house."
"I remember thinking our eyeballs hang by hooks. I don't remember anyone telling me that; I think I just came to that conclusion myself because I couldn't understand how else they are there."
"My sister made up a pop star named Rosie. Though I had never seen her or heard her music outside of my sister singing 'Rosie songs,' I was her biggest fan and would love to ask my sister all about her. I was shocked when my sister came clean after we were almost full-blown adults, haha."
"That you only had a certain amount of 'voice' allotted for your lifetime, and that's why old people's voices were very soft and shaky, because they'd used up all their voice when they were young. For a while, I was DETERMINED to have a booming voice when I was old, so I barely spoke to 'save' my voice for later."
"Have you ever gone on a highway and seen a sign that says 'speed limit enforced by aircraft'? I thought that they would just shoot you from the sky for speeding. It's not like a plane can give a ticket."
"That the opposite side of my knees were called 'leg pits.'"
"If you play Candy Crush in the car while it is pumped with gas, the car will explode."
"If you turn a light on in a car at night, you could get a ticket."
"That when you eat, the food would start to fill your entire body up, beginning at your feet. I thought people could cram food into themselves like you shove cotton into a stuffed animal."
"The left side of my body was sad because I was right-handed. So if I were eating, I'd always have the last bite on the left side of my mouth to cheer it up, etc."
And: "That 'made from scratch' meant whatever scraps were lying around."
What's the wildest or silliest thing you believed as a kid? Tell us in the comments or share anonymously using this form.
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.