
The shame of a middle-aged gym-goer
In the gyms I attend, the mirrors show a mix of the youthful and good-looking, the muscled and toned. Then there are the very fat, with their looks of wild hope or sinking doubt, the smattering of the ordinary and eccentric. And in among all these figures, lightly paunched and wearing a threadbare T-shirt that my wife would throw away if she could get her hands on it, is me.
On the upside, I can report that those who know me have commented occasionally on the amount I eat. 'Where does it go?' has been asked more than once. I am in shape. The shape in question is ovoid, but without the gym it might be triangular.
In youth, one comes into the inheritance of one's body. It can be intoxicating. Young men show the same sense when newly behind the wheel – they act like the car is an extension of their body and the thrill of it goes to their heads. When the world still has dew on it, a great deal does.
Back in the day I would put the hours in and my metrics – my weights, my speeds – would inexorably improve. No longer. Slowing my decline has become the only game I play. These days my left knee is not so good. Forgetting my greying hair, I sometimes wonder what a joint like that is doing in a kid like me. But perhaps never having had any great athletic talent makes it easier for me to continue to enjoy what little is left; I have no glory days to mourn.
I am in shape. The shape in question is ovoid, but without the gym it might be triangular
'In the face of the young man who sat on the terrace of the Hotel Magnifique at Cannes there crept a look of furtive shame,' wrote P. G. Wodehouse, 'the shifty, hangdog look which announces that an Englishman is about to talk French.' Such should be the look of a man of 53 about to lift heavy weights – which I happily no longer do. Powerlifting should, like ponytails and the use of emojis, be limited to the under-thirties. There are Americans who believe Robert F. Kennedy Jr's muscles make him fit to be Secretary of Health; my own presumption (I am suspicious of any attempt to hold onto youth pursued too long, or too single-mindedly) is that it suggests him to be dangerously vain.
Learning to love exertion is no bad thing, however – and keeping it is potentially honourable. For my part, I wish to keep the spring in my step and the sprezzatura in my appetite for as long as possible, and I enjoy retaining my taste for labour. 'Happiness,' said David Grayson, in his wonderful old book Adventures in Contentment, 'is ever a by-product; it is the half-conscious expression of a man greatly engaged in some other undertaking; it is the song of one working.' I am a 53-year-old man who can still get enthused about press-ups. I fear I deserve to be judged.
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The Herald Scotland
2 hours ago
- The Herald Scotland
Historic artefacts from 1,600-year history of castle go on display
The exhibition features historic objects from the Historic Environment Scotland (HES) collection, as well as loaned items from English Heritage and the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders Museum. Artefacts which were discovered during a 1970s excavation of Dumbarton Rock, where over 300 objects were uncovered as well as the charred remains of the early fortress, are also on loan from the Hunterian Museum. This includes a 1,000-year-old Viking sword pommel which may have come from the Viking siege of the Rock in AD 870. READ MORE: A 1,000-year-old Viking sword pommel, medieval coins and a replica of an embroidery panel created by Mary, Queen of Scots are among a number of historic artefacts on display as part of a new exhibition at Dumbarton Castle. The Rock of Ages exhibition, located in the Governor's House, has opened following an extensive refurbishment which includes conservation works to help ensure a suitable environment for significant objects to be displayed to visitors. The exhibition features historic objects from the HES collection, as well as loaned items from English Heritage and the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders Museum. Artefacts which were discovered during a 1970s excavation of Dumbarton Rock, where over 300 objects were uncovered as well as the charred remains of the early fortress, are also on loan from the Hunterian Museum. This includes a 1,000-year-old Viking sword pommel which may have come from the Viking siege of the Rock in AD 870. Jewellery box, believed to have been made by French prisoners held at Dumbarton Castle around 1815, Historic Environment Scotland collection. (Image: Scott Louden) Some of the objects on loan from the Hunterian Museum have never before been on display to the public. This includes iron arrowheads dated c.1300 from the Wars of Independence, silver coins from the reigns of Edward I (1296-1305) and Edward II (1307-1327), glass beads, and glass fragments dated from more than 1,500 years ago. Some of the pottery fragments that feature in the exhibition are from vessels which would have carried wine and perhaps olive oil, showcasing how well-connected Alt Clut, the early medieval stronghold, was to continental and Mediterranean Europe. Glass beads worn as jewellery by both the men and women of Alt Clut along with counters from ancient board games give further insight into life on the Rock. Items from the HES collection include a replica of a toucan embroidery by Mary, Queen of Scots which was one of 37 needlework panels created by her during her imprisonment in England before her execution in 1587. Mary was sheltered at Dumbarton Castle as a child in 1548 before boarding a ship to France. In addition, an early 19th century jewellery box, decorated using twists of paper which is thought to have been made by a French prisoner held at Dumbarton Castle during the Napoleonic wars, also features in the exhibition, as well as three decorated carved stones, weighing up to 183kg and dating as far back as the 10th century, which are now back on display at the Castle following an intricate operation to install them via crane. Iron arrowhead dating from the Wars of Independence (1296-1329), on loan from the Hunterian, University of Glasgow. (Image: Scott Louden) On loan from English Heritage is another rare item on display - a 150kg cannonball which was made to be fired from Mons Meg. In 1489, the six-tonne medieval cannon was dragged across the country from Edinburgh Castle to Dumbarton Castle as part of James IV's claim to reclaim Dumbarton Castle after it was seized by nobles. Visitors to the Rock of Ages exhibition can also enjoy a virtual tour of the Castle which will take them on a journey to key locations throughout the site including the top of Dumbarton Rock, offering alternative access to the steep slopes and spectacular views of the River Clyde. Stephen Duncan, Director of Marketing and Engagement at HES, said: 'This exciting new exhibition will allow visitors to discover the stories of Dumbarton Castle through the historic artefacts discovered there, giving a window into the extraordinary past of one of Scotland's oldest castles. It is a fantastic experience for anyone interested in exploring 1,600 years of Scottish history.' Paul Neeson, chair of Dumbarton Castle Society, said: 'This new exhibition is a welcome addition to Dumbarton Castle. To be able to display iconic and historic artefacts and interpretation to describe and illustrate the history of these items alongside the long and fascinating history Dumbarton Castle and the legends associated with it will be a huge boost.'


Edinburgh Reporter
5 hours ago
- Edinburgh Reporter
Looking back in time with The Old Edinburgh Club
This is the list for July: 1 July – In 1505, the Barber Surgeons of Edinburgh were formally incorporated as a craft guild of the city, and this recognition is embodied in the Seal of Cause (or Charter of Privileges); the organisation is now known as the Royal College of Surgeons of Edinburgh. And in 1999, Queen Elizabeth officially opened the new Scottish Parliament in its temporary home in the Assembly Hall on The Mound. 2 July – In 1919, in the early hours, the biggest airship in Britain (the 643ft-long R34) left its hangar at the airfield at East Fortune, took off and headed west; after a journey of four and a half days that encountered poor weather and engine problems the dirigible landed in the USA completing the first east-to-west aerial crossing of the Atlantic. 4 July – In 1505, the provost, bailies, and council announced that they had given Thomas Glendunwyne the post of burgh Bellman with the task of ensuring the High Street was kept clean. And in 1785, James Hutton, geologist, publicly read an abstract of his theory of uniformitarianism for the first time at the meeting of the Royal Society of Edinburgh. Also in 1884, the Theatre Royal burnt down. William John Macquorn Rankine 5 July – In 1560, the Treaty of Edinburgh (also known as the Treaty of Leith) was signed, the purpose being that French and English troops would withdraw from Scotland; and Mary and François were to agree to give up any claim to the English crown and recognize Elizabeth as the rightful Queen; the treaty was never ratified by Mary. And in 1820, scientist William John Macquorn Rankine was born in Edinburgh; Rankine specialised in thermodynamics and his detailed knowledge of the workings of steam engines was sparked by work he carried out as a teenager during study breaks, at the Edinburgh and Dalkeith Railway where his father worked. Also in 1847, the final run of the Edinburgh to London mail coach took place; henceforth mail would travel by train. 7 July – In 1548, the Treaty of Haddington was signed between the French and the Scots at the Nunnery of Haddington in which Mary was betrothed to the Dauphin of France; (See for full text.) And in 1559, John Knox became the first Protestant minister appointed in Edinburgh. Also in 1675, the council granted to Mr James Sunderland, a herbalist, a nineteen-year tenancy of the yard and gardener's house at Trinity College with the obligation that he keep the roof and yard walls in good repair. 8 July – In 1823, the death of Sir Henry Raeburn at his house in St Bernard's, Stockbridge, was announced. 9 July – In 1940, the first major air raid on Edinburgh began with five 250-pound bombs and six incendiaries falling near Craigmillar Castle, a 1,000-pound bomb fell beside Albert Dock, Newhaven, three bombs fell on railway lines at Leith and 48 incendiaries at Seafield Road; 38 civilians were injured and 8 died. 10 July – In 1633, the sailing ship 'Blessing of Burntisland' carrying gold, jewellery, and silver plate belonging to King Charles I, sank in the Firth of Forth; only two of its thirty-five passengers and crew survived. 12 July – In 1698, a fleet of five ships set sail from the Port of Leith for the Isthmus of Darien in Panama; the ships were launching the Darien Scheme, a project which aimed to establish a Scottish overseas colony in the New World to rival those of England and Spain; the scheme was to prove a disaster and caused the ruin of dozens of businessmen and landowners who had invested in the project; the main consequence was the subsequent Union between Scotland and England. And in 1838, the Reverend John Jamieson, lexicographer, philologist, and antiquary, died in a house in George Square. ⚓ 16 ships; only 1 returned 💀 2,000 deaths 📉 1 damaged economy The Darien Scheme was Scotland's failed colony. Explore this & other stories from the bookshelves of @welovehistory's Trinity House: 👉 🖼 Glasgow University Library. Licensor @Scranlife — Historic Environment Scotland (@HistEnvScot) December 22, 2022 14th Scottish National War Memorial 15th Scottish National Portrait Gallery, Queen Street,Edinburgh. National Galleries of Scotland. 14 July – In 1798, the United States' Consulate opened in Edinburgh. And in 1927, the Scottish National War Memorial opened in Edinburgh Castle. 15 July – In 1693, Mr James Sutherland, keeper of the Physic Garden, submitted a petition to the council explaining that he had paid his rent punctually but over the past 2 years the Gardener's House has become completely dilapidated. And in 1889, the National Portrait Gallery for Scotland opened in Edinburgh. 16 July – In 1859, the Prince of Wales arrived in Edinburgh to prepare for his entrance to Oxford. And in 1901, at around 12:30 an ear-splitting explosion broke out at the Tod Brothers flour mill in Baker's Place, Stockbridge, leaving a trail of devastation in its wake and claiming the lives of six people. Also in 1970, the 13th Commonwealth Games opened in Edinburgh. 17th Adam Smith 17 July – In 1790, Scottish economist Adam Smith died in Edinburgh at the age of 67; Smith is regarded as one of the founding fathers of philosophy and economics; his portrait has featured on both Scottish and English banknotes and he is commemorated by a statue at St Giles Cathedral. 18 July – In 1898, actor John Stuart was born in Edinburgh; he appeared in more than 150 films including The Loves of Mary Queen of Scots (1923), The Hound of the Baskervilles (1932), Escape From Broadmoor (1948), Sink the Bismarck (1960), and Superman (1978). And in 1940, bombs fell on Leith and Newhaven. 19 July – In 1911, the Foundation Stone of the Usher Hall was laid. 22 July – In 1913, Edinburgh Zoo opened for the first time. And in 1940, more bombs fell on Leith and Newhaven. 23 July – In 1637, the Wars of the Three Kingdoms (often referred to as the English Civil War) began by footstools being thrown at the preacher in St Giles in Edinburgh in protest against the new prayerbook proposed by Charles I; tradition has it that Jenny Geddes shouted 'Ye daur say Mass in ma lug!' and threw her chair at the pulpit. 27th – The Royal Scottish Academy 29th – James Craig's plan 27 July – In 1760, the Scottish School of Design was founded in Edinburgh; it later became the Royal Institution and finally the Royal Scottish Academy. 29 July – In 1565, the widowed Mary, Queen of Scots, married Henry Stuart, Lord Darnley, Duke of Albany, in the Palace of Holyroodhouse in Edinburgh, Scotland. And in 1767, the Town Council presented James Craig's plan of Edinburgh's New Town. 30 July – In 1335, a body of Scots led by the Earl of Moray at the Battle of Boroughmuir defeated an English force en route to join Edward III and his army at Perth; the English king had invaded two years earlier, marking the start of the Second War of Scottish Independence. And in 1496, Mr William Forbes, provost of the Collegiate Kirk of St Giles granted the land and chamber of the curate and the school below to the burgh in order to enable the city to enlarge the churchyard and parish burying-ground. Also in 1588, the Earl of Bothwell killed Sir William Stewart in Blackfriars Wynd. 31 July – In 1871, the Emperor and Empress of Brazil, Dom Pedro II and Theresa Christina Maria, visited Edinburgh. Compiled by Jerry Ozaniec, Membership Secretary of the Old Edinburgh Club, [email protected] Like this: Like Related


Spectator
12 hours ago
- Spectator
The shame of a middle-aged gym-goer
We are told being non-judgemental is a virtue, that discrimination is a vice, and that the avoidance of prejudice is not merely possible but laudable. Perhaps the quickest way to give the lie to these statements is to reveal to you that I am a 53-year-old man who regularly goes to the gym. What are we to make of someone of advanced middle age who nevertheless spends some of his few remaining hours lifting bits of metal up and putting them down again? Prejudice, I fear, suggests the worst. In the gyms I attend, the mirrors show a mix of the youthful and good-looking, the muscled and toned. Then there are the very fat, with their looks of wild hope or sinking doubt, the smattering of the ordinary and eccentric. And in among all these figures, lightly paunched and wearing a threadbare T-shirt that my wife would throw away if she could get her hands on it, is me. On the upside, I can report that those who know me have commented occasionally on the amount I eat. 'Where does it go?' has been asked more than once. I am in shape. The shape in question is ovoid, but without the gym it might be triangular. In youth, one comes into the inheritance of one's body. It can be intoxicating. Young men show the same sense when newly behind the wheel – they act like the car is an extension of their body and the thrill of it goes to their heads. When the world still has dew on it, a great deal does. Back in the day I would put the hours in and my metrics – my weights, my speeds – would inexorably improve. No longer. Slowing my decline has become the only game I play. These days my left knee is not so good. Forgetting my greying hair, I sometimes wonder what a joint like that is doing in a kid like me. But perhaps never having had any great athletic talent makes it easier for me to continue to enjoy what little is left; I have no glory days to mourn. I am in shape. The shape in question is ovoid, but without the gym it might be triangular 'In the face of the young man who sat on the terrace of the Hotel Magnifique at Cannes there crept a look of furtive shame,' wrote P. G. Wodehouse, 'the shifty, hangdog look which announces that an Englishman is about to talk French.' Such should be the look of a man of 53 about to lift heavy weights – which I happily no longer do. Powerlifting should, like ponytails and the use of emojis, be limited to the under-thirties. There are Americans who believe Robert F. Kennedy Jr's muscles make him fit to be Secretary of Health; my own presumption (I am suspicious of any attempt to hold onto youth pursued too long, or too single-mindedly) is that it suggests him to be dangerously vain. Learning to love exertion is no bad thing, however – and keeping it is potentially honourable. For my part, I wish to keep the spring in my step and the sprezzatura in my appetite for as long as possible, and I enjoy retaining my taste for labour. 'Happiness,' said David Grayson, in his wonderful old book Adventures in Contentment, 'is ever a by-product; it is the half-conscious expression of a man greatly engaged in some other undertaking; it is the song of one working.' I am a 53-year-old man who can still get enthused about press-ups. I fear I deserve to be judged.