Everything frowned on in Starmer's Britain is being celebrated thanks to the plucky Lionesses

Telegraph

6 days ago

It is probably sacrilegious to say this, what with the joyous Victory Parade in The Mall, and with a triumphant double-decker, military-band-accompanied route to Buckingham Palace, but the Lionesses didn't really 'win' the final of the 2025 European Championship. It's more that they refused to lose. The second half of Sunday's nail-biting climax saw Spain's annoyingly gifted players pretty much take up residence in England's half – and it's fair to say our girls rarely troubled the Spanish goalkeeper, who saw so little action she could easily have gone off for a coffee, or a pedicure.
Many of us hiding behind cushions on the sofa at home were resigned to our fate, thinking glumly that we'd lost to the better team. Except a couple of things were so very annoying that we went on longing, hope against hope, for our underdogs to bite back. The French referee, Frappart, kept falling for the Spaniards' theatrics – such blatant drama queens they could have been the men! – and she penalised England's divine super-sub Michelle Agyemang for a non-existent foul. La vache!
Agyemang is a devout Christian, who touchingly fell to her knees in prayer during the penalty shoot-out (worth a try!), but even she may have struggled to find forgiveness in her heart for that cheating lot. And what Briton didn't long for our cheeky girls to overcome the hatchet-faced, towering Spanish manager, Montse Tomé, a terrifying combination of Morticia Addams and Joyce Grenfell. There are friendlier peregrine falcons.
In the end, it was the sheer bloody-mindedness what won it. This is where we score, even when not scoring. 'When we were down against Sweden and down against Italy, we f---ing showed grit and determination and we came back,' said Chloe Kelly correctly, if not politely. 'You can't write the English off.'
No you can't, bless your sweary, patriotic heart, Chloe. It was live wire Kelly – the iconic winner in Euro 2022 when she famously took her shirt off – who came on in this final and instantly played a near-perfect cross onto the forehead of Alessia Russo, who headed it into the far corner. If you could bottle Kelly's bottle, you'd have a remedy for what ails our flailing nation.
And let us pause to salute a milk-lorry-full of bottle from Lucy Bronze, who admitted afterwards that she had played the whole tournament with a fractured tibia. Ouch, thrice ouch! The 33-year-old defender played 598 minutes across the entire competition, with only Keira Walsh, Alex Greenwood and goalie Hannah Hampton appearing on the pitch more for Sarina Wiegman's side. Weighing up excruciating pain against loyalty to your team, while knowing full well that your resolute blocking is key to protecting England's goalmouth… Well, that Bronze has some mettle.
Of course, there are still grumps who complain that women's football is rubbish, and it may well be that a bunch of 14-year-old boys recently beat the Swiss ladies' team, but so what? It is hugely entertaining, full of twists and turns sometimes lacking in more polished performances, and the girls look a lot prouder to be playing for the national team than their prima donna male counterparts, who often seem to be phoning in their England performance from their £2m Ferraris.
Determined and fearless, the women also banished the quavering ghost of many a doomed England penalty shoot-out – no mean feat.
It was wonderful to see so many young girls among the thousands cheering in The Mall. There has been a huge rise in participation in female football, at primary and secondary level, since England's previous victory, and it's great that a generation in which eight-year-olds are obsessed with make-up (to the point of addiction) have found some 'influencers' worth being influenced by.
'I am so proud to be English,' said an emotional Kelly. That remark, and all the St George's red crosses on a white background, must have given London mayor Sadiq Khan and Emily Thornberry conniptions. Remember, Thornberry was the Labour MP forced to resign from the shadow cabinet in 2014 after she posted a picture of a house in Rochester with three England flags and a white van parked outside. It was snobby, Islington-Lefty shorthand for, 'Eww, look at these racist bigots!'
Passion for this country has become the love that dare not speak its name – no other people on Earth are made to treat natural, nationalistic feeling with suspicion. But Kelly, and other girls like her from normal, working-class backgrounds, haven't been educated into Western self-loathing, or the contempt for patriotism that passes for sophistication. How refreshing to hear such a heartfelt endorsement for the English and for England without the obligatory 'multiculturalism' rider to render it palatable to our Leftist overlords.
It will make a great victory even greater if the Lionesses give young people the message that pride in your country is a wholesome and rather marvellous thing. A lesson for us all, actually, as we try to rescue our poor island from what feels like irrecoverable decline. Be more Chloe: refuse to lose.