Billy Joel reveals he tried to ‘end it all' with two suicide attempts after affair with best friend's wife

New York Post

06-06-2025

He was an angry young man.
In his new documentary, 'Billy Joel: And So It Goes' — which had its world premiere at the Tribeca Film Festival on Wednesday night – the piano man, 76, opened up about a dark time in his past.
When he was in his early 20s, Joel was in a band called Attila with his then-best friend, Jon Small.
10 Billy Joel and wife Elizabeth Weber circa 1981 in New York City.
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During that time, Joel fell in love with Elizabeth Weber, who was Small's then-wife. Joel attempted suicide over the affair – twice.
'I was just in a lot of pain .. so I just thought I'd end it all,' he said on-screen.
10 Billy Joel performs on stage at the MCG on 10th December 2022 in Melbourne, Australia.
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After surviving, he quipped, 'You can't even do yourself in.'
The 'Uptown Girl' singer has previously revealed his suicide attempt as early as 1990, but he went into more detail in the documentary.
'Bill and I spent a lot of time together,' Elizabeth shared in the doc. Small recalled that Joel told him, 'I'm in love with your wife.'
10 Billy Joel and drummer Jon Small of the rock band 'Attila' pose for a portrait in 1970.
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'I felt very, very guilty about it. They had a child. I felt like a homewrecker,' Joel said.
The 'Vienna' singer added, 'I was just in love with a woman and I got punched in the nose which I deserved. Jon was very upset. I was very upset.'
In the fallout, Attila broke up, their friendship ended for a long time, and Joel had a downward spiral.
10 Elizabeth Weber and Sean Weber-Small attend the 'Billy Joel: And So It Goes' Opening Night Premiere at Beacon Theatre on June 04, 2025 in New York City.
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10 Billy Joel with Elizabeth Weber in 1979.
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'I had no place to live. I was sleeping in laundromats and I was depressed I think to the point of almost being psychotic,' he said.
The 'Only the Good Die Young' singer added, 'So I figured, 'That's it. I don't want to live anymore.' I was just in a lot of pain and it was sort of like why hang out, tomorrow is going to be just like today is and today sucks. So, I just thought I'd end it all.'
His sister, Judy Molinari, was working as a medical assistant at the time and gave him sleeping pills.
10 Billy Joel attends MSG Entertainment and Billy Joel special franchise announcement at Chase Square at Madison Square Garden on June 01, 2023 in New York City.
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'Billy decided that he was going to take all of them… he was in a coma for days and days and days,' she said in the documentary.
She emotionally recalled, 'I went to go see him in the hospital, and he was laying there white as a sheet. I thought that I'd killed him.'
The 'We Didn't Start The Fire' hitmaker said that he was 'very selfish' at the time.
10 Billy Joel with his wife Alexis Roderick and daughters Della Rose Joel and Remy Anne Joel attend the 66th GRAMMY Awards at Crypto.com Arena on February 04, 2024 in Los Angeles, California.
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10 Billy Joel, at home in front of some of his gold discs, New York City, 25th January 1978.
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He recalled waking up in the hospital thinking he wanted to do it again — but this time 'right.'
The next time, he drank a bottle of 'lemon Pledge,' Molinari said.
Small took him to the hospital, which ultimately caused the two men to mend fences.
10 Billy Joel circa 1969.
Redferns
'Even though our friendship was blowing up, Jon saved my life,' Joel said.
Small explained, 'He never really said anything to me, the only practical answer I can give as to why Billy took it so hard was because he loved me that much and that it killed him to hurt me that much. Eventually I forgave him.'
Following his suicide attempts, Joel got back together with Weber, who went on to become his manager. They were married from 1973 to 1982. She was the first of his four wives. His other exes include Christie Brinkley, Katie Lee, and his current wife, Alexis Roderick, whom he married in 2015.
10 Billy Joel appears on SiriusXM with John Mayer at SiriusXM Studios on October 11, 2024 in Los Angeles, California.
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Meanwhile, Small took the high road after Weber inspired Joel's 1971 debut, 'Cold Spring Harbor.'
'You could tell from the lyrics that he was really in love with Elizabeth,' Small said of songs such as 'She's Got a Way.'
The music legend was absent from his big night after revealing his shocking brain disorder diagnosis two weeks ago. However, Weber was in attendance.
The two-part documentary will premiere on HBO and HBO Max at an unannounced date later this summer.
If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts or are experiencing a mental health crisis and live in New York City, you can call 1-888-NYC-WELL for free and confidential crisis counseling. If you live outside the five boroughs, you can dial the 24/7 National Suicide Prevention hotline at 988 or go to SuicidePreventionLifeline.org.