Do Fussy Babies Belong in Restaurants? The Internet Is Divided

Yahoo

3 days ago

A mom says she was shamed for bringing her fussy baby to a restaurant. Now, she is curious: 'Was I out of line?'
'If you have your kid on a screen, you're a 'bad' mom — but if your kid isn't sitting peacefully, they're 'annoying,'' Lauren Winthrop, a mother in Los Angeles, tells TODAY.com.
On TikTok, Winthrop recalled a 6 p.m. celebratory dinner at a restaurant with her husband and 11-month-old daughter on his birthday.
'I desperately need to know who is in the wrong here,' Winthrop said in her video, adding that she chose a French spot that was, 'kind of fancy but not like, crazy fancy.'
Winthrop explained that an older woman seated one table over, was "rolling her eyes, huffing and puffing' at Winthrop's baby, who was irritable.
'Now, my daughter's teething, so she was ... kind of whiny, but not like, insane,' Winthrop said in her video. 'She wasn't throwing a tantrum, and again ... she's a baby.'
According to Winthrop, her daughter was not crying, but 'made the tiniest peep' every now and then.
Winthrop said she was made to feel 'so insecure' by the other diner that she and her husband considered boxing their main course and leaving early.
'Then, I finally looked at my husband and I'm like, 'This woman ... I don't know her, I'm never gonna see her again, it's his birthday,' Winthrop said in the TikTok video. 'My daughter's not even throwing a fit.'
Winthrop added, 'Is it preposterous to bring a baby to a nice restaurant on a Saturday night? Am I so rude for doing that? I just feel like we're entitled to still have life experiences even though we have a baby.'
The mom discerned between a 10-year-old child 'throwing a tantrum' and an infant. 'Dude, have some compassion,' Winthrop said in the video. 'Am I so out of line here?'
Winthrop asked, so TikTok answered.
'You are entitled to still have life experiences, even though you have a baby. You aren't entitled to ruin other people's life experiences because you have a baby.'
'Even if she was crying, that's OK! Children are allowed to take up space and exist in public. You're giving your daughter great experiences. Keep it up!'
'What moms don't think is a tantrum is definitely a tantrum to others. This isn't a place for a teething baby.'
'There are places that babies aren't welcome: Expensive restaurants, movies, shows, etc. Get a sitter.'
'Fine dining on a Saturday night is not the place for a baby.'
'This isn't Disney World.'
'You are downplaying how loud your kid was.'
'Babies don't need to be anywhere that requires a reservation.'
'It was his birthday? Perhaps it was also this lady's birthday.'
'Even at nice restaurants, the 6 p.m. hour ... is more the family hour.'
'People are entitled to live child-free, but not in a child-free world.'
'We're bringing our baby to Paris ... in a few weeks. I'm not getting a sitter in a foreign city so we can go to dinner. Girl, you did nothing wrong.'
'Feeling empathy for parents with a fussy baby is reserved for situations where the baby HAS to be there, like a plane ... as a parent, you should understand there are things you won't be able to do for a little while.'
Winthrop tells TODAY.com that children can't learn how to behave in public if they aren't brought to public spaces.
'We made an effort to pick her up and walk her around outside,' Winthrop explains of her baby. 'We were on top of it.'
Winthrop says the restaurant staff was friendly toward her baby and while there were no children's menus, there were highchairs.
After experiencing months-long postpartum anxiety, Winthrop was grateful to enjoy a meal out.
'If I saw a mom struggling like I was, I would have walked over to her and said, 'Don't worry about it,'' Winthrop says.
Do fussy babies belong in restaurants?
Infants — in any mood — should be welcomed in public places, according to Jacqueline Whitmore, a business etiquette expert in Florida.
'Babies get fussy and that's just the way it is,' Whitmore tells TODAY.com.
Whitmore says people can usually find humanity in a strained situation.
'If someone has a problem with a baby, they could ask to be re-seated — even if they arrived first,' says Whitmore.
She adds that parents can approach the other table and say, 'We're so sorry that our baby is making a fuss.'
When you break the ice, says Whitmore, 'People can often be very forgiving.'
This article was originally published on TODAY.com
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